Page 10 of Jorax (Arixxia Fields #4)

Chapter Ten

S yrryn

I drift awake, enveloped in warmth, the solid bulk of a muscular chest rising and falling steadily beneath my cheek. For a disoriented moment, I tense, confused about where I am and how I ended up using this hulking beast as a pillow.

Then memory filters back—stargazing with Jorax, oohing and ahhing over the meteor shower, laughing over his surprisingly profound comments about the meaning behind the streaking lights.

Sleep overtook me at some point, along with the insane urge to snuggle against his sturdy frame as if he were a humongous version of a favorite stuffed toy from childhood.

As I awaken, my first impulse is to jerk away in embarrassment, but the weight of his arm around my shoulders is undeniably comforting. Now that awareness has returned, I have to admit… I feel safe here. Protected.

I breathe deep, catching traces of cedar and harsh soap wafting at me from Jorax’s warm bulky frame. The scent triggers a swell of affection in my chest. I can’t remember the last time I awoke feeling so content.

My mind drifts back over the past weeks: the easy camaraderie between us in the lab and Jorax’s shy smiles when I asked him to join me exploring the falls or little cafes around Arixxia Fields.

So different from Icaron’s polished charm and bold invitations to fancy restaurants and cultural events, yet so much more genuine—and comfortable .

When did I start looking forward to my humble outings with Jorax more than the prospect of lavish dates with my striking supervisor?

The realization hits me like a thunderclap: I haven’t missed Icaron at all these past weeks.

Truth be told, I was relieved when he canceled, even though it pissed me off that he did it last minute, and by comm.

With Jorax, I feel completely myself, appreciated just as I am without the makeup and slinky dresses. We connect on a deeper level, built on trust and understanding rather than attraction.

I lift my head carefully from the steady rise and fall of his chest, peering up at Jorax’s craggy profile, silvered by starlight. He looks almost peaceful in repose, the tension that usually tightens his shoulders is blissfully absent.

Unable to resist, I reach to smooth my fingers over one perpetually furrowed brow, marveling at the texture of his skin under my fingertips. How can it look so harsh and yet be soft as rose petals?

Overhead, the meteors continue to blaze across the sky in brilliant flashes.

I watch their glittering trails reflect in Jorax’s eyes when they blink open to meet mine.

My breath catches at the emotion laid bare there: hope, longing, and perhaps a glimmer of fear that I’ll pull away now that this dreamy interlude has ended.

Impulsively my gaze drops to his full lips, chapped from anxious biting but infinitely gentle when he speaks with me. I wonder how they would feel pressed to mine, if he tastes as earthy and wild as he smells.

Forcing those thoughts to the far reaches of my mind, I start a conversation. Instead of the intimacy of kissing, I pursue a different type of intimacy—emotional.

“I never told you why I’m so passionate about curing Eryxi.” I may not have the nerve to kiss him, but I courageously wind my fingers through his. Though his eyes flare wide in surprise, he doesn’t yank his hand away, in fact, he grips me tighter.

“I’ve wondered, but didn’t want to pry. ”

“It’s hard to talk about, but Eryxi took my older sister.

” I try to relate this without expressing too much emotion.

Over the years, I’ve managed to overcome most of the pain.

“I was still in elementary school, but I still remember every detail of watching her fall increasingly ill and then slip away.”

Jorax tightens his grip on my hand, then tugs me closer, my head on his chest so I can allow a few tears to fall without feeling as though he’s intruding.

“That must have been torture,” he husks. “Watching her fight the devastating disease and feeling powerless to help.”

“Exactly.”

“You were just a child. I’m sure you know there was nothing you could do.”

How sweet of him to try to soothe me.

“But there is something I can do now. That’s why I’m here, at the best research program in the galaxy with the most brilliant scientist at the helm—you. This is my life’s work.”

“Brilliant?” He clears his throat nervously. “I don’t know about that, but having two passionate people steering this project bodes well for a good outcome. Sometimes I can taste how good it will feel when we crack the code to cure this disease.”

Our gazes catch and hold. Our connection feels deeper than co-workers, more powerful than two people passionate about putting an end to this disease.

“I felt drawn to cure Eryxi for a different but very personal reason. The brentian form of the disease can be disfiguring. I know full well how challenging it can be to receive pitying, or worse, repulsed looks. One day, perhaps because of our work, children will never have to deal with that.”

I turn to look at him, feeling more connected in this moment than perhaps I’ve ever felt with anyone. Not only do we share such deep passion for this cure, but Jorax just pushed himself outside his usually private comfort zone to share one of his deepest secrets, what makes him tick.

Affection for this kind male barrels at me. I’ve been feeling it for weeks, but have pressed it back, minimizing and denying it. But I can no longer pretend I don’t have feelings for Jorax.

Before I can lose my nerve, I lift my chin, drawn to him like gravity. Easing to my knees, bravely keeping our gazes connected, I touch my lips softly to his. Though he watched my slow approach through increasingly wide eyes, he stiffens in surprise, muscles coiling tight.

For an endless moment, he’s frozen, stunned perhaps, that anyone would want to kiss his monstrous face. Then a ragged, desperate moan escapes him that seems to well from the depths of his soul.

“Syrryn?”

That word is as eloquent as if he’d asked a novel’s worth of questions.

My whispered, “Yes,” answers each and every one of his questions in the affirmative.

He tentatively kisses me back, his hands hovering uncertainly at my waist as if afraid I’ll shatter under his hulking strength.

My fingertips glide over his masculine features, learning the rugged landscape of furrows and hills of his flesh as well as the metallic plate on his forehead.

I trace the proud ridge of his brow, and the prominent slope of his nose, memorizing through touch alone since our lips remain locked together.

His mouth is firm yet pliant against mine, his skin is warm under my seeking fingertips.

My pulse thrums faster when I nip his full lower lip and another broken sound rumbles through his chest. The kiss grows heated as our lips move together with building urgency, all the suppressed longing between us catching ablaze.

When I boldly trace his sculpted lip with my tongue, he clutches me tighter with a muffled groan, our bodies aligning in a way that steals my breath. I drag my nails down his corded neck muscles, avoiding the railroad track scar that travels up one tendon.

He shudders hard, pulling me closer until no sliver of starry night can creep between us. We’re fused together by lips and questing hands alone as I shift so my knees can straddle his masculine hips.

We finally come up gasping, foreheads touching as we share ragged breaths under the vast infinity of space.

The meteors blaze trails of light at the edges of my vision, but I only have eyes for him.

His smoldering yellow eyes, naked in their vulnerability, sear me to the very core.

They’re so different from Icaron’s aloof, practiced allure.

I banish all thoughts of Icaron, vowing not to give him another moment of my time when I’m in the presence of Jorax. My feelings for this male are too full and he’s too tender and important for me to sully our time together.

I smooth a slightly unsteady palm over Jorax’s chest, feeling the thunder of his heart under my hand. His lips crush desperately to my temple and I wonder, could this be his first kiss? If not, for some reason I know it’s the only one that ever mattered across his long, lonely years of existence.

“Wow,” I whisper when I can form words again.

No one has ever kissed me with such sweet restraint yet crackling passion.

His emotions have been kept on a tight leash for so long.

As if he was pouring years of secret longing into this single perfect moment, yet is still afraid it will slip away like stardust if he moves too quickly.

“Yeah…” His voice is hoarse with wonder.

Although I don’t know exactly what he’s affirming, it doesn’t matter. I imagine he’s saying yes to everything.

I layer light, reassuring kisses over his cheeks, his eyelids, and the vulnerable line of his throat. He groans, pulling me tighter against him until I don’t know where I end and he begins. “Why do I feel like that’s something we’ve both wanted for a while?” I ask softly .

A shudder runs through his powerful frame. “Maybe for longer than I realized.” His tone holds a note of awe that makes my heart twist behind my ribs.

I smile against his fevered skin as joy wells up to almost choke me. “How can I wonder what took us so long when at the same time I’m glad we waited?”

Jorax’s humongous hand cradles my jaw so gently, I could weep. His yellow eyes shine bright with hope and so much tender affection that my heart clenches. When he kisses me this time, still restrained but no longer tentative, it feels like a new beginning written in the glittering stars overhead.