Page 23 of James (Big Northwest #6)

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

JAMES

“ I T’S GOING TO be fine.” Phillip reached across the car to slide his hand around hers, giving it a squeeze. “Take a deep breath.”

“I don’t want to take a deep breath.” She did anyway. “I want to hyperventilate until I pass out.”

Phillip chuckled, the sound low and deep. “I don’t think it’ll go over well if I show up and you’re unconscious.”

She let her head fall back against the rest of the rental car they picked up at the airport after landing in Seattle. “Fine.” She rolled her eyes toward him. “I guess I don’t want my sisters to murder you.”

“For the record, I don’t think they’ve directly murdered anyone.” Phillip’s lips pressed into a frown. “There was a slightly suspicious story about a couple of guys who were accidentally eaten by bears on the outskirts of town though.”

“Interesting.” At least something exciting had happened while she was gone. It gave her hope that living in Shadow Pine wouldn’t be a complete slog. “I’m sure they deserved it.”

Phillip squeezed her hand, offering up a wickedly sexy grin. “Vicious.”

“I can’t help it.” James looked out the window at the sea of trees lining the road. “It’s genetic.”

She was happy to finally be seeing her sisters again. Couldn’t wait to get her hands on Jude and Lily. Part of her was even a little excited to see how much the tiny town she and her sisters owned had changed while she was gone.

But most of her was twisted up and miserable. Yesterday had given her a peek at how different her life could be if she just figured out how to keep her tiny little reflexive rage issue under control. She could work in a place like Phillip’s office. Live in a city with tall buildings where something was always happening. She could travel. For real this time.

The problem was, she didn’t want to live in a random city or work in some random office. She liked Chicago. She liked Phillip’s office.

She liked him.

Even though he didn’t sex her up last night. Hell, he didn’t even feel her up. Just made her an amazing dinner, snuggled her on the couch, and then tucked her into his luxurious bed and took his spot as the big spoon, holding her close while they slept.

And she fucking loved it. Loved every minute of being with him. Even the ones where they were climbing out of windows and hitting men with cars. Even when they argued and even when he was a little bit of an idiot. She was a little bit of an idiot sometimes too.

But now that was all over. Because freaking Enzo had to show up and force her hand. If he’d just stayed away a little longer maybe she could have figured something out. Found a way—a reason—to convince Phillip she should probably stay in Chicago.

Instead she was in the middle of nowhere Washington. Feeling like a total ass for being less than excited.

Her stomach clenched again when Phillip made the final turn, angling the fancy SUV he rented onto the road leading into Shadow Pine. It’d been years since she’d been on this stretch of asphalt, but it was still so familiar it easily dragged her back in time. Back to when she thought the world was her oyster and limits didn’t exist.

Before she found out oysters were gross and she was a whole limit herself.

She gripped Phillip’s hand tight as the sign he’d been standing in front of in that photo on his phone came into view. Then the trees broke and the tiny scrap of a town she’d left behind filled the windshield.

Only it wasn’t so tiny anymore. Still small by most people’s standards, but compared to the one in her memory, it was huge.

When she left, Shadow Pine was little more than a post office that also served as a bare-bones general store, the abandoned storage building adjacent to it, and the large block building across the street where they all lived. There was also a garden in the back and they’d been in the process of building a structure with a commercial kitchen in it for Sam to make bread out of, but that was it.

Now there was… a lot. Lots of buildings. Lots of houses. Lots of cars.

Lots of people. The place was packed with visitors. They milled the sidewalks and lined the road, carrying deep green bags printed with the same logo carved into the welcome sign.

Fight the Patriarchy in Shadow Pine

Fuck yes.

Phillip slowed down as she gaped at the changes, offering up a commentary on all he knew about her former home. “On the right is where Danny has her shop. She lives in that two-story behind it with Jude and Craig.” His head tipped to the other side of the street, nodding toward a set of cute little houses that sat away from the road, a stretch of grass separating them from ‘downtown’. “Those houses belong to Charlie and Alex.”

They crept up on the abandoned storage building which now sported a crisp white exterior and window boxes filled with flowers. The side entrance had a pretty new door that was painted deep green and topiary style trees filled planters at either side of it. “That’s where Alex and Edward have their office.”

James perked up a little. “Alex works with her husband?”

“As far as I can tell, most of your sisters work with their husbands.” Phillip eyed her. “JD used to work with Danny at her shop, but now he spends half his time helping Frankie out with her logging business.”

That was an interesting little tidbit of information. “Too bad I don’t have a job. How will I lure some unsuspecting man into the mountains of Washington to do my bidding?”

Phillip’s hand flexed around hers and his jaw clenched. “Is that what you want?”

No. It wasn’t what she freaking wanted, but now that they were there, she felt like an even bigger asshole saying a life in Shadow Pine wasn’t what she’d been dreaming of.

Luckily, a familiar face saved her from having to admit the truth. “ Stop .”

Phillip hit the brakes, jerking her forward as she fought free from the belt holding her hostage. The second it released, she jumped out of the SUV and raced toward the little boy she’d missed so much it made her insides ache.

“ Jude .” She all but tackled her nephew, squeezing him tight.

“Aunt James?” His voice was muffled against her shoulder. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to see you.” She leaned back but didn’t let him go, looking over the little boy who’d grown so much while she’d been gone. “I can’t believe how big you are.”

Jude’s face had lost its baby fat and his frame lacked the chubbiness it once sported. Even his voice had deepened, and it had tears biting at her eyes. She’d missed so freaking much. All because she couldn’t make herself be happy here.

Jude stared back at her. “Mom’s going to crap her pants when she sees you. Craig told her you couldn’t come back yet.”

“ James ?” The yell carried down the street, straightening her away from Jude.

“Holy shit.” Frankie gaped at her wide-eyed from where she stood in front of one of the new buildings lining the main street.

As one, the crowd of people packing downtown—mostly women—turned toward her.

“Uhh.” She took a step back, shoving her nephew behind her body. “Ju-Ju. Why are all these people staring at me like that?”

“Because you’re famous, duh.” Jude had apparently also grown a little bit of a tween attitude while she was gone. “You better get ready. They’re all gonna want to hug you.”

Just as the herd started to shift, Phillip stepped in front of her, blocking her with his body. “Give her room. I’m sure we can arrange for her to be at the cafe for the meet-and-greet.”

The fuck was he talking about? Meet-and-greet?

“Come on.” Phillip hooked one arm around her and collected Jude with the other, quickly leading them past where he’d parked the car, straight to the field separating Charlie and Alex’s homes from downtown.

But instead of directing her to one of her sisters’ houses, Phillip turned, revealing two, much bigger structures that had been hidden by the office and general store. “What the fu—” She managed to catch herself before dropping a bomb in front of her nephew. “Who lives here?”

“Your half-brother, Lance, stays in that one when he comes to town with his family.” Phillip motioned to the smaller of the two while all but dragging her and Jude toward the porch of the bigger one. “And this is the bed and breakfast Alex’s in-laws run.”

“So it’s not just husbands who move here, but also their families?” She was trying to wrap her head around what would make so many people want to move their lives to such an isolated location.

“I guess they all found the place that made them happy and decided to stay.” Phillip hurried them up the steps and through the door into a soaring entryway.

She sucked in a breath at how pretty the inside was. “I guess I can’t blame them if they get to live here.” Never in her wildest dreams would she have expected a place like this to exist in Shadow Pine. The three-story building had a Victorian feel even though the finishings were crisp and clean.

“Hello?” a male voice called out. “I’ll be right there.”

Phillip leaned close, his lips close to her ear as he warned, “Brace yourself.”

An older man rounded the corner, wiping his hands on a towel. His feet skidded to a stop on the hardwood floors as the towel hit the floor. He stared at her a second as both palms went to rest on his cheeks, mouth hanging open. “I can’t believe what I’m seeing.” He blinked a few times, eyes misty.

Then he rushed her.

Phillip wasn’t kidding when he told her to brace herself.

She struggled to breathe as she found herself pinned in the most all-encompassing hug she’d ever experienced in her life. It was freaking weird and unexpected and bizarre and…

Kinda not awful.

The man was full-on crying now, sniffling as he continued squeezing her. “Oh, honey.” Another sniffle. “I’m so glad you’re home.”

She widened her eyes at Phillip, hoping he would save her from whatever was happening.

“She needs to breathe, Jeffrey.” Phillip gave the man a pat on the back. “There’ll be plenty of time to smother her.”

“I know.” Jeffrey released her and wiped at his eyes. “I’m just so happy she’s finally here.” He grabbed her hands, gaze fixed on where she stood. “You’re just as pretty as your sisters.”

“Thanks.” James pushed on a smile even though guilt was already eating her insides. This guy clearly thought she was back for good. Expected her to come back to Shadow Pine and seduce some random dude into moving here with the rest of the peas in his pod.

“You two are probably hungry.” He hooked one arm around James’s shoulders and the other around Phillip’s, leading them into the kitchen where Jude was already perched on a stool eating through a plate of cookies. “We weren’t expecting you so soon so I don’t have anything fancy made.” He parked her on a stool and dropped Phillip right beside her, hustling around the island to the fridge, opening it right as a whole lot of voices filled the entryway she’d just left.

It was the only warning she got before her sisters were on her, led by Frankie. She was hugged and squeezed within an inch of her life as they passed her around, getting just as weepy as Jeffrey was.

Especially Sam.

She’d been the one who stepped in the most after their mother died, taking up the vacant spot as well as any little girl could. Her eldest sister held her the longest and cried the hardest, refusing to let go until a giant man with a big beard gently pulled her away so someone else could get a turn.

“I guess I have to stop being mad at you.” Danny poked Phillip in the shoulder as she smoothed down James’s hair. “I am a little pissed you said she would call us and then instead showed up without warning.”

“And how would it have gone over if I’d warned you?” Phillip bit off a chunk of cookie, chewing through it. “Then you would have all been lined up waiting as soon as the sun came up and these pricks,” he motioned to the men loitering around the edge of the group, “would have kicked my ass when I got here because you didn’t get enough sleep.”

Not a single one of the men argued, making her think Phillip might not have been exaggerating. And that was also weird. So fucking strange to see men this close to her sisters. To know that they uprooted their whole lives to make her sisters happy. Came to Shadow Pine to help them build an empire.

And that’s what it seemed to be. An empire of sorts. One built from spite on the bitter memory of the man who made them who they were. And now was being nurtured by the men who showed them what they weren’t.

Her eyes drifted to where Phillip sat. His gaze was fixed on her, pointed and intense. She couldn’t imagine him here any more than she could imagine herself here. His fancy suits and thriving business didn’t belong in Shadow Pine.

And even though it was so much bigger than she remembered and filled with all sorts of people, she didn’t belong there either.

That’s why, when the day was done and her sisters had all gone home to their own houses and their own beds with their own adoring men, she snuck out of the room Jeffrey and his husband Kenneth put her in. Creeping down the hall, being as silent as she could since many of the people staying there would love nothing more than to have the undivided attention of a Karlson sister, she made her way to Phillip’s room.

He’d told Jeffrey he was going home in the morning, and there was no way the man was leaving without hearing what she had to say.

As she lifted her hand to knock, the door opened, sending her jumping back in surprise.

Phillip was still dressed in his suit, but it was a little rumpled. His hair was wild and unkempt, as if he’d been raking his hand through it. The way he did when he was upset or overwhelmed.

“James.” Her name rushed through his lips in a way that almost sounded like relief. Like he’d been waiting for her. “I was just…” His hand went to his hair, confirming her suspicions. “What are you doing here?”

She opened her mouth, planning to explain all the reasons he shouldn’t leave tomorrow. That he should stay for just a little longer.

And then take her with him when he left.

Instead, she jumped, launching herself at him, arms and legs wrapping around his body as he caught her. Phillip kicked the door closed as his mouth claimed hers, sealing them together.

And for the first time today, things felt right.