Page 49

Nat

There was a time when I hated Day River. When all I wanted was to find a way to ensure my daughter didn’t get stuck here, living the same day over and over, watching the same people over and over, like spinning tires in a muddy rut.

But now, I stand atop a snowy mountain looking down on my glistening city, and I think how beautiful it is, in the right light. Life is like that city—how it looks is all about the light you shine on it.

I never realized that until the man beside me popped into my life—one minute nowhere, and then everywhere, all at once. My little ghost, haunting me, in the dark and in the light. My ghost, my salvation, my comfort.

My reminder to look at the world and smile.

“So, how’s Syd’s internship going?” he asks now, his voice a whisper on the wind. “She always seems, you know, Very Busy, but in like, a good way?”

“I like you.” I laugh, wrap an arm around him, and pull him in close, just so I can breathe in the soft scent of strawberries, the faint undertone of coffee. “And yes, Syd loves her internship. Kid’s always been a rink rat.”

“So I imagine she’ll want to keep doing this kind of stuff?” He cocks his head towards me. “You know, after school’s done? ”

I shrug, keeping my arm around him. “She hasn’t decided yet. She’s been talking to Jesse a little about opportunities he might be able to help her with.”

“That’s awesome.” He shifts in my embrace so he’s half turned towards me. “How do you feel about . . . you know. Jess?”

His name still makes me feel a little cold. But it’s not quite like it used to be—like a knife wedged between my ribs or an electric shock. “Better, I guess. He’s good with her, so I appreciate that.”

“It’s a start.” Olli nods. “But there’s a lot of unresolved stuff between you two.”

“Yeah,” I agree. “Don’t know that it’ll ever really be resolved, but I guess at least we’re amicable?”

“Right.” Olli tilts his head against my shoulder, nestling into my side. “And what about Syd? Think she’ll leave Day River in her pursuit of Great Things?”

“Dunno.” I shrug again, keep my eyes on the city. “I mean, that’s what I wanted, right? For her to get out? But at the same time, I think she’s a Day River girl. Maybe she’ll go, but I think she’ll come back.”

“If she goes, would you?”

“Nope.” I plant a kiss on his nose. “You’re here. My team is here. So I’m here too.”

Besides, the cold’s in my blood, same as it’s in Avery’s blood and Syd’s and maybe, I think, Olli’s too. The future isn’t certain or decided by any stretch of the imagination, but right now, this moment feels damn good.

In this moment, this is exactly where I want to be—who I want to be.