Page 34 of Ink Sworn (Greatdrakes #3 | The Fae Universe #24)

V alentine waited until everyone had finished eating and catching up. He was tired and wanted to take Yelena back up to her tower and have his wicked way with her. There was no hope of that.

"Taranis? Can the boys and I use one of your meeting rooms?" Cosimo asked.

His uncle nodded. "Take the lounge. Quinn, Charlotte, and I want to show Lachie and Bridget some other parts of the city."

"I'll come with you," Yelena said, and her hand lightly squeezed Valentine's under the table. "Find me after."

He wanted to make her stay, but this conversation was for his brothers and father alone. Their mates would be there to comfort them afterward if they needed. Valentine had selfishly wanted Yelena to be there. She was the only one who knew the whole story, but she knew better. She always did.

Valentine filled up his wine and went and sat beside Bas. He didn't want Apollo's messy emotions, and he was struggling to look at his father as it was. Bas could be relied upon to be calm in any situation that didn't involve his mate in danger. They all had their limits.

"Okay, Valentine. It's just us. What is this all about?" Cosimo asked.

Valentine had a mouthful of wine. "If I tell you, you all have to promise not to interrupt until I’m done, or I won't get through it."

They all looked at Apollo.

"Oh, come on, that's not fair," he said and then grumbled. "Fine! I won't say anything."

Valentine ran his hands through his hair and cleared his tightening throat.

"About a week before Mom died, I had a vision of her being in an accident. I thought it was a nightmare. I had been getting a lot of them, and I wasn't good enough back then to be able to tell what was real or not," he began and drank more wine.

"I didn't say anything at the time. It was just my stupid anxiety.

I was always so worried that something was going to happen to one of us.

I... I had started to hear a voice inside of me.

It was telling me things. It was in the dream that I had of Mom.

I thought the Greatdrakes curse had finally started. "

"Val..." Cosimo whispered before shutting his mouth.

"After Mom's accident, I knew it was my fault.

If I had said something—anything—maybe she wouldn't have been on the road with Apollo that day," Valentine continued, his voice cracking.

He stared at his hands. "I couldn't tell anyone about the vision or the voice.

Dad had lost it. We were all confused and grieving and were doing the best we could.

I decided I wasn't going to let the Greatdrakes madness take me away when you all needed me to protect you. "

He touched the scars on his chest and the ruins of the sigil.

"I learned binding magic, and I locked down the voice that had been talking to me.

It cut off part of my magic, so I created more to keep it in check.

I thought if I put limits on my abilities, I would always be able to control the magic and the madness. "

Valentine dared to look up at his brothers. They all looked pale and upset, but not angry. That was a relief. He wouldn't be able to deal with their anger on top of everything else.

"Everything was working fine until the fae returned. It was the beginning of the struggle with my bindings," he said and cleared his throat again, needing to force the words out.

"Once again, I thought I had gotten a handle on it, and then the uncles came back and started to fix magic, and none of my usual tricks were working.

Taranis told us that he thought we had dragons inside of us, and I began to think about the voice I had mistaken for madness.

I released some of my bindings to help Apollo in France, and I couldn't get the power to go back in its cage.

When Yelena was kidnapped, I shifted, but the bindings were still there.

I knew with her help, I wouldn't hurt anyone when I finally removed the last of it.

I can finally control it, and the magic, too.

I promise I'm not going crazy, maybe for the first time in years. "

Valentine finally looked at Cosimo, and hot, horrible tears filled his eyes. "I'm so sorry about Mom. I'll never be able to make it right. All I have ever wanted was to protect you all from what I am, and what I thought I was becoming."

Cosimo got up and sat down on the other side of him. He pulled Valentine into a hug, and somehow it was worse than any anger could be. The hard lump in Valentine's throat finally broke free in a sob, and he covered his face with his hands.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Dad. I'm so sorry. It was all my fault..."

"My poor boy," Cosimo sighed, holding him tighter. "If anyone is to blame for your mother's death, it was me. I was meant to be taking Apollo to his friends that day, but I was too caught up in my research, and I made Lisa go. "

"But I saw it! If I had said something..."

"Then what? She would have never driven again? We all would have thought it was a nightmare too," Cosimo tried to soothe. "Tell me something—have you had any visions like it since?"

Valentine sniffed. "Only about Yelena, and that's why I had to go after her and save her. I knew it was different, and not just a normal nightmare."

"I guess that explains why your aura is so different," Bas said and rested a hand on his back.

"I thought it was his dragon shift, but I hadn't seen it like this since we were kids," Reeve added. "I knew it was connected somehow."

Apollo wiped at his cheeks. "No wonder you turned into such a moody asshole."

Valentine flipped him off, making Apollo laugh and wipe his tears again. "I'm with Dad on this, Val. You can't blame yourself for Mom's death anymore. I was the one who made her drive that day, too, so if anyone is to blame, it's me and not you or Dad."

"How about you all just stop trying to take the blame at all?

" Reeve said and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"It was an accident, plain and simple. Mom loved all of us, and to be honest, she probably would be pissed off at us right now.

She would have wanted the best for us. That's not binding our magic or holding guilt over her death.

It's been almost twenty years. Maybe it's time you all found a new hobby or something to obsess over.

Like, do you guys know Valentine has three heads when he shifts? "

"What?" they all said at once.

"Thanks, Reeve, you dick," Valentine said, sitting back upright.

Cosimo left an arm around him, and for once, Valentine didn't feel like he had to count down to remove it .

"Why three, I wonder?" Bas said, his magician's brain already ticking over.

"No one knows. Taranis and the others said it's rare. I'm also an alpha, which I guess is a power level thing. Yelena is, too," Valentine replied.

Cosimo pulled out a silk handkerchief and wiped his eyes. They were glowing with a deep violet, and Valentine wondered if he was even aware of it.

"I wonder if Dad would change if you shifted and roared at him too," Reeve said.

"Let's not try it," Cosimo replied quickly. "My body has had enough shocks for one day. Do you have any more secrets you'd like to share while we're here, Valentine? Just in case I need more gray hair."

Apollo piped up. "At least it suits you, Dad."

"Strangely, that isn't helpful, son."

Valentine knew his biggest secret would likely get him locked in the nearest dungeon, so he went with the second biggest.

"My dragon thinks Yelena is my mate."

"No shit," Apollo said and laughed. "I mean, you might be dyads and all, but the mates thing makes sense too."

Cosimo rubbed his thumb over his stubbled chin. "But she's not fae. She's wild. How does that work?"

"I don't know if it's two-sided? She hasn't said anything to me about it. All I know is that my dragon is insistent about it," Valentine replied. "Neither one of us is a normal type of dragon. Maybe it's because we are both alpha? It could be a million things."

"Well, I think it's adorable," Bas said with a wide grin. "Baby Girl Galadriel is hooking up with our own little Sauron. Layla is going to have a field day."

"Layla's probably already written the fanfiction," Apollo said, with a wicked little cackle. That set off all the brothers, and Valentine let them have their teasing to lighten the mood.

"No more secrets, Val," Cosimo said softly while his other sons carried on.

Valentine couldn't promise that. "I really did think it was my fault. I was only trying to protect the family."

"And that was never your job. It was mine," Cosimo growled. "I failed you boys after Lisa's death. I fucked you all up more than her death ever did."

"That's not true. You lost your mate," Reeve said, silencing Apollo and Bas. "If something happened to Charlotte, I don't think I'd be able to live with myself."

"Don't say that," Cosimo snapped. "You think I would be able to handle losing any of you? This family has had enough death and loss of mates. Yes, it was horrible, and I lost my fucking mind, but I was also a father and should have been there for you."

"You couldn't even be there for yourself, Dad," Valentine said, and his father flinched. "We were all old enough to take care of each other and Reeve. None of us resents what happened then. We didn't know how to help you, but we didn't blame you."

"Bloody hell, I'm going to start crying again," Cosimo complained. "I am sorry, boys. No one could have helped me understand any of it, and I'm so grateful that you all have Taranis and the other dragons to help you if something happens to me."

"Nothing is happening to you," Apollo said, poorly hiding his panic. He shut his mouth for a second before mischief sprang in his golden eyes. "Except maybe finding another mate."

"You are still old enough to get grounded," Cosimo warned, making the rest of them laugh.

"He's right, Dad. You might have another one out there like Taranis and his dragons said," Bas argued, making Cosimo curse in Italian .

"Boys, I love you and the fact that you all have found your mates, but I'm too old to be dealing with that kind of nonsense.

My dragon will cause a shift when it is ready to.

I don't need, or want, another mate," he said firmly.

"If I wanted to remarry, I would have done so by now.

I tried dating. It was terrible. Dragon or not, sometimes there is only one person out there for us. "

Valentine raised a brow. "When did you try to date?"

"None of your business. It wasn't for me. I'm happy being a bachelor," Cosimo said sternly.

"You are now, but what if you come across someone you really like again?" Apollo argued. "You know we wouldn't care, don't you? You deserve to have someone, too."

Cosimo got up. "And that's enough of this conversation for me."

"Dad, we are being serious," Reeve said, crossing his arms. "We wouldn't care if you wanted to remarry or mate or whatever. We know it wouldn't mean you loved Mom any less, but she wouldn't want you to be alone either."

Cosimo let out a tired sigh. "Thank you for your opinions, but I'm content with how my life is now. I'm not lonely. I'm happy. Now, I suggest we all get some sleep."

"Ah, huh, way to deflect the conversation, now it's about you," Valentine teased, but got to his feet too. He felt lightheaded, like a massive weight had finally been lifted from him.

"Val, a final piece of advice?" Cosimo said, making him pause. "Don't wait too long to tell Yelena that she is your mate. This fight with Midir is going to be horrible and messy before it is over. Don't go into another fight with it weighing on your heart."

Valentine hugged him. "Thanks, Dad. I love you."

"I love you, too." Cosimo held him tighter. "Don't ever hurt yourself like that again, or I'll be tempted to kill you myself. I have never once thought that the family madness would claim you. "

"I'm starting to think there was never a family madness," Valentine replied and let him go. "Maybe it was just their dragons all along."

Cosimo's face fell. "Gods, you could be right. Something for us to look into when this mess with Midir is over."

"Count me in," Valentine replied, and he smiled his first unguarded smile in decades. He turned to Bas, his plan taking a better shape in his head. "Hold on, baby brother. I have some questions I need to ask you."