Page 58 of Immortal Consequences (The Souls of Blackwood Academy #1)

Olivier

There wasn’t enough cheap champagne in the world to mend what he had broken.

How could he have spoken to Emilio like that?

With such bitterness? With such disregard for his feelings?

But this outburst was just another reminder that perhaps Olivier hadn’t changed as much as he thought he had.

He still held on to his proclivity for pushing people away—his tendency to lash out when faced with panic and indecision.

He was like a wild animal, desperately gnawing off his own arm in an effort to save himself.

He reflexively went to grab another champagne glass but stopped himself, shoving his hand back into his coat pocket.

What would drowning his sorrows in drink prove?

It was just another way of escaping what he had done.

No… he should face the consequences of his actions with as much dignity as he could muster.

He should turn back around and run straight to Emilio and plead his case. He should—

“I don’t know what I did wrong.”

Olivier glanced over his shoulder, only to find Emilio standing in front of him. God…he had never hated himself more. Emilio was watching him with red-rimmed eyes, nervously wringing a napkin between his hands.

“Emilio.” Olivier sighed, rubbing his face in exasperation. “You did nothing wrong. I’m just a careless drunk. Really.”

“It’s more than that. There’s something you’re not telling me.”

“Of course. But what is a man without his secrets?”

Emilio didn’t budge.

“Olivier.”

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Right. You’re not going to let this go, are you?

” When Emilio didn’t respond, simply staring at him with unwavering resolve, Olivier knew he had lost this fight.

“All right, fine. I suppose being drunk off champagne is as good a time as any to tell you…” He let out one final quivering breath before summoning up the courage to say the two words he had hoped never to speak out loud. “I’m…forgetting.”

Emilio blinked.

“Forgetting what?”

“I’m forgetting, ” Olivier repeated. “My memories.”

And there it was. The one thing Olivier had wanted to avoid. The one thing he knew would break his heart into a million fractured pieces. That terrible, anguished look in Emilio’s eyes once the truth washed over him.

“No.” Emilio shook his head, denial twisting his features. “That…that can’t be. You can’t…”

“Afraid so.” Olivier masked his heartache with a shrug, leaning back against the wall behind him. “If I’m not crowned the Decennial victor, it’s bye-bye memories and hello eternity spent roaming the Ether.”

“How can you be so callous?”

The question pierced Olivier in the chest—a searing blade straight through his heart.

“Excuse me?”

“How can you stand there and act like all of this is some big joke to you?” Emilio sputtered. Whatever sadness had been clouding his eyes was replaced with an unfamiliar look of anger that made Olivier want to evaporate on the spot.

“It isn’t that simple—”

“Of course it isn’t!” Emilio shouted, his voice hoarse. “If you transitioned…if you were sent into the Ether…it would change everything. You would never—you would never be allowed to enter Blackwood again. You would never—”

“You honestly don’t think I know that?” Olivier shot back, the restraint inside him finally slipping, the mask falling away.

When he spoke next, his words were laced with desperation.

“You don’t think that this has been eating away at me?

That I haven’t been drowning in my own misery?

Knowing that I stand to lose everything? That I stand to lose you ?”

Emilio flinched. The words rang out between them.

He stepped closer, his eyes softening. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because…” Olivier rubbed his face in exasperation. “Because I’m an idiot. Because I didn’t want to put this on you. I didn’t want to be a burden, to be something to be looked at with pity—”

“A burden?” Emilio choked out. “You could never be a burden to me. You are—you are everything to me. Don’t you understandthat?”

Olivier felt his heart stutter—the most wonderful and glorious pain. You are everything to me. He wanted to tattoo the words onto his skin. Burn them into his mind. Hear them recited for the rest of eternity.

He gently cupped Emilio’s face before he could even comprehend what he was doing.

Emilio seemed equally shocked, his eyes widening and mouth parting slightly.

It suddenly dawned on Olivier how easy it would be to close the distance between them.

How had he never realized how simple it all was?

It was just a single movement. A tiny, insignificant leap of faith. A second of bravery.

But clearly the universe must have been conspiring against him, because it was in that same moment that Masika appeared beside them, chest heaving up and down as she attempted to catch her breath. Behind her stood Josie, Carter and Irene—all of them with the same panicked look in their eyes.

Olivier swore under his breath, dropping his hands from Emilio’s face.

“Impeccable timing, Masika.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” she muttered, mustering an apologetic smile. “ Truly. But…you two need to come with us to the garden.Now.”