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THIRTY-SEVEN

Alderney State Penitentiary,

Dear Amethyst,

Our conversation this morning meant everything to me. I hope you understand that my attraction to you goes deeper than your beauty and the blood on your hands.

I find you to be a queen among killers. You’re a kindred spirit, who is equally as imprisoned as I. Under my guidance, I will free you of the shackles of your psychiatrist and parents.

You are loving. You are strong. You are sane. You are mine. I am all you need to survive. If they withdraw financial support for not taking medication, let them. I will meet your needs.

Would you believe that I came to enjoy my missions as a child assassin? At first, my tutors explained that our targets were powerful criminals who evaded justice. We needed to render them unconscious to allow a team of investigators to infiltrate their homes and gather enough evidence to hand to the police.

It’s embarrassing to admit, but I swallowed their lies and even pictured myself as a Dickens-style pickpocket, targeting rich marks and exacting a form of street justice. It was easy enough to get close to these men. I would attend functions or crowded events, pretending to seek out my parents .

As a small child, I would get the freedom to roam wherever I pleased and was almost invisible to security staff. All that was required of me was to inject a target with a potent poison, using a needle with a narrow gauge.

The girls in my intake were not so fortunate. I didn’t know about this until much later, but they attended extra classes, where they were taught to be Lolita assassins.

You may be aware of the term in popular culture being used as a seductive or sexually precocious young girl, but our female counterparts were anything but. They were mostly runaways, although one of them was the daughter of our tutor with a background similar to mine.

While the boys returned from missions triumphant and ready to enjoy rewards like new games for our consoles, the girls came back traumatized and withdrawn. Some girls never returned at all.

Our tutors explained that they weren’t like us. They were weak and couldn’t handle the pressure. I was too young to understand the true cause of their anguish.

Fan questions:

I don’t have a celebrity crush as I refuse to fixate on a stranger without knowing what’s in her heart. Of course, there are some I believe are visually pleasing, but it’s all a facade. With enough time, any half-trained assassin can change their appearance and make themselves unrecognizable. I do, however, enjoy female characters who rise from the ashes of degradation and defeat to exact revenge on their abusers.

Unfortunately, Bianca the cat was my last pet. I prefer cats over dogs because they’re aloof, independent, and have a mysterious allure that keeps me intrigued. Affection from a dog is easy, attention from a cat feels like a reward. Do I like a particular breed more than others? I’ve always been intrigued by giant Maine Coons.

Yours,

Xero

P.S. Were the photos I sent alright? I forwarded them at the lowest resolution so as not to encroach on our time together at the blind spot.