Page 40 of I Think I’m in Love with an Alien

SquidHead: How’s everyone today?

Jeneticist: Just doing a little stargazing. I mentioned the telescope before, right? ???

Stargazer: I’ve always imagined that shooting stars are aliens writing in our skies.

FarfromHome: How would you reply?

JazzyPlum: Music is a universal language, right? ?? Maybe aliens dig jazz…

Seeker: I enjoy it. Especially Clifford Brown.

Stargazer: Does that mean you’re an alien?

Seeker: …

SquidHead: I read octopuses might be aliens. ?? So I’m basically an expert in xenobiology.

FarfromHome: I’ve always wondered, why are you so obsessed with squids anyway?

SquidHead: I started going bald at like 17. And people started calling me SquidHead.

Stargazer: Aw, kids can be so mean! ??

SquidHead: I dunno why, because it’s not like squids have hair and lose it. They’re hairless to start.

JazzyPlum: Did you take ownership of the name they gave you?

SquidHead: That was why at first. But then I got really interested in squids for their own sake.

Jeneticist: I might regret this, but…lay some interesting octopus info on us.

SquidHead: So glad you asked! ??

SquidHead: They have one central brain and more in each arm. They have the largest brain-to-body ratio in any invertebrate. They can navigate through mazes or open jars!

SquidHead: They can even use tools or wield external weapons, like how the blanket octopus carries tentacles from the Portuguese man-of-war.

Stargazer: This is actually super interesting. Didn’t know any of that!

SquidHead: One final fun fact. They do group hunts with other species, and they’ll even punch fish to keep them on task.

Jeneticist: ??Hahahaha, OMG, so glad I asked.

JazzyPlum: Now I’m pretty sure octopi are aliens.

Seeker: Sounds accurate.

FarfromHome: This is the most I have ever enjoyed any of our conversations. Thank you, SH.

Stargazer: Okay, game time! You know I can’t let a chat end without us learning a little more about each other.

Stargazer: 2 Truths and a Lie—I’ll start.

1. I’ve seen a UFO.

2. I own a meteorite.

3. I sleep under the stars every night.

SquidHead: Hmm, I call #3 the lie.

JazzyPlum: How can you own a whole meteorite? #2 is a lie.

Jeneticist: I dunno, it could be a trick. I had glow-in-the-dark stars on my bedroom ceiling as a kid. #1 is the lie.

FarfromHome: Statistically, #3 seems improbable.

Seeker: Gotta be #3, unless you live in a planetarium.

Stargazer: Jen wins! Wish I’d seen a UFO but never have. I have a small chunk of meteorite as a paperweight, and I still have those glowing decals on my ceiling.

Seeker: Who goes next?

Stargazer: Jen got it, so it’s her turn.

Jeneticist: OK, here we go.

1. I have two cats.

2. I cook a delicious beef Wellington.

3. I minored in mythology.

Stargazer: Oh, well played. These are all plausible. Those are the hardest to spot!

SquidHead: Mythology and astronomy don’t match. I think #3 is the lie.

FarfromHome: I don’t know what beef Wellington is. #2 is the lie.

JazzyPlum: It has to be 2 or 3. I’m going with SH on #3.

Seeker: Then I choose #2 along with FFH.

Jeneticist: Winners! Seeker and FFH got it. I don’t like beef Wellington and I certainly can’t cook it.

Jeneticist: Hot take, beef Wellington is a corn dog for snobs.

Stargazer: Since we have two winners, FFH goes next, then Seeker, regardless who wins FFH’s round. Then Seeker’s winner will go if they haven’t yet. ??

JazzyPlum: The judge has spoken! ??

FarfromHome: Fine.

1. I am vegan.

2. I have an extensive home garden.

3. I have a pet rooster.

JazzyPlum: This will be tough. But I can’t imagine you keeping a rooster. #3.

SquidHead: I vote with Jaz. #3

Seeker: I think it’s #2.

Stargazer: I honestly am not sure, but I think it’s #1.

Jeneticist: I’ll vote with the bloc. #3 from me too.

FarfromHome: I am stunned to declare Star is the only winner. ??

Stargazer: Woo-hoo!

Jeneticist: Back up, you’re not vegan and you have a pet rooster?? Really?!

JazzyPlum: Yes, we need details. ??

FarfromHome: I eat honey, so technically, I am not vegan. Removing it doesn’t hurt the bees if one is careful. And the rooster is named Kevin.

SquidHead: …you named your pet rooster Kevin?

FarfromHome: He came with the property. He was already named Kevin.

Stargazer: This might be my favorite convo we’ve ever had.

Seeker: Same. ??

Jeneticist: Would love to see pics of your garden sometime, FFH.

JazzyPlum: Me too!

SquidHead: Hate to break up a good time, but I gotta go. I’ll take my turn next time.

JazzyPlum: Bye, all!