Page 45 of I Choose You (Wilder #2)

“Hey,” she said. Her voice was low and soft, like she was soothing a scared mountain lion.

“It’s okay. I mean, it’s kind of hot when you get all incensed on my behalf,” she laughed, easing some of my tension.

She thought I was angry about her boss, and sure, that always pissed me off.

But it wasn’t what had caused my dark mood.

I rubbed my hand on her thigh and put the truck in park. She reached for the door, but before she could open it, I wrapped my hand around her head and pulled her to me for a deep kiss.

Our tongues mingled together, and my fingers caressed her scalp, tugging slightly on her hair to move her right where I wanted her, where I needed her.

Her hands framed my face as she scratched her fingers down the back of my neck .

“Wow, what was that for?” she asked when we finally pulled apart.

I should tell her. I wanted to tell her. I had never said the words to anyone other than my family and Kayleigh.

Would I be saddling her with guilt when she left, knowing that I loved her? Or did she deserve to know how I felt about her, regardless of how or when this ended?

Thoughts pinged through my head at rapid speed, but I must have been silent for too long because Claire wasn’t waiting for my answer anymore. She kissed me one more time and then hopped out of the truck.

I followed her into the house, my chance to tell her behind me. But honestly, I still wasn’t sure if I should or not.

Claire went to set up her laptop in the bedroom and make sure everything was caught up before the weekend when Wyatt walked in without knocking, carrying Jane.

“Hey, big girl.” I took Jane from Wyatt’s arm and settled her on my hip.

“We are going to have the best time today, aren’t we?

” I snuggled my nose under her chin and pretended to eat her chubby little neck.

It always made her laugh. She tried to mimic my actions back to me, leaving a mess of drool in her wake.

“You do that to yourself, you know,” Wyatt said sagely as he passed me a paper towel.

“It’s worth it.” I shrugged.

After giving me a quick rundown of his plans, Wyatt dropped the diaper bag on the counter, gave Jane a kiss, and left to meet Maeve for their doctor’s appointment.

Claire came down the hall, having changed into yoga pants and one of my T-shirts, her blonde hair pulled into a hair clip.

“Sorry I missed Wyatt. I was just getting changed into something more comfortable.”

“He’ll be fine.” My gaze raked her up and down.

“Hi, Janey Bee,” Claire sang to her as she waved wildly in my arms. “Are you ready to have a fun-filled day with Uncle Reid?”

Jane leaned toward her, ready to tumble out of my arms to get to Claire. She pulled Jane onto her hip like she was made for it. My chest suddenly felt tight. I could see Claire in the future, a baby of her own on her hip. My baby.

I put the TV on cartoons for Jane, not that she watched them. She was mobile now and was far more interested in all the things she could get into.

“Hey, sweet girl. What are you doing?” I cooed to her. She was crawling over the couch, throwing the pillows onto the floor and laughing. I would pick them up, and Jane would throw them onto the floor again and again. She was entertained by literally everything. It made me laugh.

Jane nearly tumbled off the couch, but I scooped her up before she could fall. Putting her on the floor, I sat with her, pulling out some of the small toys Wyatt had left.

Claire sat with us. She picked up Jane’s squishy pink camper van and drove it up her arm and over her head, coming down the other side. Jane laughed so hard she fell over backward. Reflexes had my hand cushioning her head before it hit the ground.

“I’d have one of these one day,” I said.

“What? A baby?” Claire asked, her gaze shooting to mine.

“Yeah. For a minute, I wasn’t sure, but growing up, I always saw myself as a father.”

“Really? I don’t know why, but I guess I never really thought about guys specifically wanting to be fathers. I always thought that was a girl’s thing, wanting to be moms.”

“Hey,” I scoffed. “Guys want to be dads too. If you saw my dad when I was growing up, you would want to be just like him too.”

“That is the cutest thing,” she said, a bright smile on her face.

“Just what every guy wants to hear,” I deadpanned, shooting her a look with my brows furrowed.

She just laughed at me. “Seriously though, what did you see for yourself growing up? How many kids did young Reid want to have.”

“Four.” My answer was quicker than I expected. I hadn’t thought about this future in a long time. My plans and dreams had changed over time, but young me—and current me—wanted a big family.

“Wow. That’s a lot of kids.”

Jane was hitting Claire along the side of her face with the camper van in her version of playing. Claire placed her hand on top of Jane’s and guided her up and over Claire’s head.

“So, what about you? What did young Claire see for her future self?”

“What did I see for my future, or what did I want?” she asked.

“Are those two different things?”

She leaned against the back of the couch next to me, reaching out to stroke Jane’s head once. She had a smile on her face, but it was one of her sad ones. The kind that dimmed the light in her eyes.

“I saw the future my parents wanted for me. For Dad, that was law school. Big-time lawyer that would join his firm. He would be able to tell everyone how proud of me he was. Mom’s vision was different.

She was fine with law school, until I married, of course.

Once a child or two came into the picture, I would shift to being a stay-at-home mom, raising the kids while my husband provided for his family. ”

My brows quirked at her. “So, you compromised and got a history degree.” I nodded like that made perfect sense.

Her laugh was genuine, and I felt like I could breathe again.

“Well, I did go to law school. I just didn’t make it all the way through.

I dropped out, much to my father’s disappointment.

It was by far the most rebellious thing I had ever done.

But I knew that law wasn’t the right fit for me.

I went back to school a few years later to get my degree in history.

I would be a terrible lawyer, and I think deep down, my father knows that too,” she laughed.

“So that was what you saw. What did you want?”

Jane had crawled away and was now exploring the living room. She would walk a couple of feet and fall. Pull herself up and do it again. Claire and I both had our eyes on her but left her to the small world of independence she had now that she could walk.

“I wanted it all, of course. A career of my own. A family that I loved and adored. A couple of kids that I could raise to be strong, independent people,” Claire said wistfully.

“You can, you know. Have all of it. If that’s still what you want.” I brushed her hair away from her face where it had fallen out of her clip.

“I always felt like, to be successful, I would need to choose. Be a high-powered career woman or a stay-at-home mom. Trying to have it all just meant doing multiple things badly instead of one thing great.”

“Not if you have the right person behind you, supporting you.”

Claire’s eyes roamed my face, and then her soft, plump lips met mine. I closed my eyes and breathed her in, kissing her slowly one more time before I had to pull away and get my eyes on Jane.

Claire and I played with Jane and fed her the dinner that Wyatt had left us. Jane was lying across my lap, her blanky clutched in her little fist, eyes drifting closed when he and Maeve showed up a few hours later.

“Hey, sleepy girl.” Maeve pulled Jane to her.

“How’d your doctor’s appointment go?” Claire asked Maeve as we helped Wyatt pack up her things, which had somehow managed to get scattered throughout the living room.

I pulled Wyatt aside, my eyes trained on Claire as she talked to Maeve about her pregnancy.

“I need to convince Claire to stay,” I told him. “I can’t lose her. Wy, she’s it for me. I can’t lose her.”

“Alright, brother.” He nodded. “We’ll think of something. Although, for the record, I still think telling her that you’re in love with her should be step one.”

I shook my head. I couldn’t do that to her until I knew where her head was at. I had to come up with a way to show her that she could have everything she wanted right here. In Calla Bay. With me.