Page 19 of Hutch (Minnesota Raptors #2)

“We had a place like this where I’m from.

It’s probably twice as small as this. We had the counter stools only.

No tables. The only thing they served was hot dogs, ice cream, and the best fries in six counties.

I remember if you wanted coleslaw, you went there.

They didn’t want to sell it because it was only for their hot dogs, but if you knew the owner, then they’d slide you a cup of it here or there. ”

“Sounds like a greasy hole in the wall.”

“It is and I love it.” The smile that graces her lips is beautiful to behold. I think it’s the first real smile I’ve seen. I thought her smiles before were awesome, but this…this is like seeing into her soul.

“So, you like these kinds of places?”

“I love food, but I particularly love places like this that have better food than most restaurants.”

I file that away for future use. I’ll need to look up more places like this throughout the city.

“I have a sweet tooth much to my coach’s disgust. Give me sugar and I’m happy. Keep me completely away from it and I can turn into a grouchy monster.”

“Are you completely staying away from sugar?”

“I tried. I really did, but even Coach told me to eat a piece of candy.”

She frowns. “Don’t do that. There are ways to get your sugar fix without ruining your diet.”

“How so?”

“My best friend growing up was diabetic. Her mom made sure she didn’t miss out. There are ways to eat sugar without it being detrimental to your diet.”

“Chocolate?”

“Chocolate is a little harder, but it can be done.”

“Hmm…I’ll ask Mom to look into some diabetic friendly recipes that involve sugar.”

“Your mom reminds me a lot of you. You both tend to ignore the word no and just bulldoze ahead.”

“I don’t ignore the word no. But when I set my mind to something, I can be very focused.

Like now, I want to be your friend and I get it might come off pushy and if it does, just say that.

I’ll dial it back a notch. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable or dread seeing me. That’s the last thing I want.”

“You are very pushy.”

“Sorry.” Dammit. If I back off, she’ll push me even further away. How to keep her close and make her not feel pressured?

“I don’t really have anyone. Nana died, my brother’s in an unknown location, and I’m always scared a soldier will show up on my doorstep to tell me he died in the line of duty.

My friends either went to college or moved away.

The ones that stuck around…well, let’s say they ended up in a dead end job, some on drugs, and others drifted away naturally.

I’m trying to get my life together and learn how to not depend on anyone but myself.

It’s hard. Most days it’s all I can do to get through. ”

Fuck. “I’m sorry.”

She waves that away. “I’m afraid if I let people in, they’ll just go away again and I’ll be back to being alone. It’s better to keep it that way than to lose so much again. It has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with me. Can you understand that?”

“I can, but that’s a hell of a lonely way to live.”

She shrugs and looks out the window. “It is, but it doesn’t end up hurting so much.”

“Or it ends up costing you more pain in the long run. If you let people in, they can share the pain with you.”

“Maybe.”

“All I’m saying is maybe think about not pushing me away so hard? I really do want to be your friend.”

“You want to be more than my friend.”

“I do, but if all you can deal with is being my friend, then that’s what’ll I’ll be until you can handle more.”

“And if I can’t handle more?”

“Then we’ll just be friends. We all need friends, Daisy. It’s not healthy to cut yourself off from any sort of external relationships.”

“I know that, but it’s hard.”

“I’m worth the effort, though.” I give her my dimpled grin in an effort to lighten the mood. I don’t want to bring her down and she looks so sad right now.

“You’re full of yourself.”

“That too, but still worth it.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“You’re worth the effort too.” Before I can say anything, our breakfast arrives. That was quick.

“Thank you,” Daisy murmurs.

“Let me know if you need anything else.” She sets a fresh carafe of coffee on the table along with a container of fresh cream for the coffee before hurrying off to the next table.

“This smells so good.” Daisy leans down and takes a deep breath. I can smell the strawberries and cream from my side of the booth. Makes me wish I’d ordered her crepes as well.

“Best place for breakfast in the city for a reason!” someone across the way shouts.

I look up to see Gordan Socks, our second line defensemen, sitting with a few of the other hockey players a few booths down.

How did I not see them when we came in? Nor did I realize they were close enough to hear our conversation.

Daisy seems to have come to the same realization as her body posture has gone from relaxed to tense. The openness in her expression is gone as well. It feels like all the progress I made seems to have gone by the wayside. I’m hoping that’s not the case.

“Who’s this?” Gordon nods to Daisy.

“Daisy, meet the guys. Guys, this is Daisy. Now shut the hell up and mind your business.”

They all laugh and go back to their food.

She glances at them and then back out the window.

“They’re idiots. Harmless idiots, but still idiots.”

Daisy shrugs and starts to eat, leaving us both in silence. It’s not until the hockey players leave that she seems to relax again. That bothers me.

“You good?”

“Fine.”

“I know you’re fine, but are you good? You seemed to clam up when the guys were here. And now that they’re gone, you seem less tense.”

“I uh…” She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. “I’ve had some bad experiences with teammates you could say.”

“This have to do with the ex that shall not be named?”

She stares at me for a full minute before she makes a decision. “Joseph was on the football team. Quarterback. State and regional champion for three years. He had an ego and so did his friends that were on the team. Let’s just say that ego led to comments I didn’t appreciate from his friends.”

“He didn’t tell them to fuck off?”

“It was funny to him.”

“That’s not cool.”

“There’s a lot of things I see now that wasn’t cool. When you’re seventeen and in love, you tend to ignore all the red flags because you think the relationship is special.”

“When you’re ready, I’m here to listen about all of his assholery and we’ll come up with a diss track or something.”

“You can write and mix music?”

“Fuck no but doesn’t stop me from helping you get all that anger out.”

“You think I’m angry?”

“Yeah, sweetheart, you are. I can see it in your posture, your tone, and your eyes. But it’s okay to be angry. He was an asshole and let his friends say some shit he shouldn’t have. I’d have kicked all their teeth in had I heard it.”

She sighs and slumps down. “I really don’t like to talk about it.”

“Then let’s not talk about it. Why don’t you spend the rest of our time here telling me a little bit about growing up in West “by God” Virginia as I’ve heard it called.”

“I can do that.” She gives me a hesitant smile and I sit back and listen to her tell me about growing up in a small mountain town where everybody knows everybody.

By the time the bill’s paid and I’m dropping her at her class, she’s back to the same relaxed person she’d been before the guys showed up.

And maybe a little closer to letting herself accept me as her friend.

That’ll be enough until she learns she can trust me.