Page 5 of Hunted Pack (Her Vicious Pack #7)

Luca

I feel like I’m being torn apart on the inside, split into two. I’m so happy that my family is safe and that they’re here and that I can see them and hold them and talk to them.

For years, I lived with the fear that even though the Hearts told me that they were still alive and that they would stay safe, as long as I did everything they wanted me to, that those were all lies.

For years, I didn’t know if my family, if everyone I loved, was alive or dead.

I didn’t know if they were out there, living happy lives, or if they were…

I swallow hard.

No. No going there anymore!

They’re here. They’re safe!

I can finally breathe again, stop carrying the pain of the unknown.

But also… My pack. The pack of contradictions and impossibilities.

A pack with a dangerous but cute female Omega, a dangerous and strong male Omega, a controlled and protective male Alpha, a female Alpha who seems to understand me without me having to tell her anything and a male Alpha who looks out of place with the others, though fits in with them perfectly at the same time.

From the moment I reacted to Mathew’s pheromones all those years ago, I already knew that if I ever found my fated mate or mates, that things would not be easy. Life for people who get away from the Suits is never going to be easy, never without danger.

What I didn’t expect was how dangerous and complicated things would become.

I never expected that I wouldn’t be able to be around some of my mates, not for some ‘expected’ or ‘common’ reason, but because of things that the Hearts did to me.

I never expected that the Hearts would purposefully harm me in ways that would not just hurt me in the short-term but that would keep hurting me, years if not decades later.

And not just me. That would hurt my pack, including Mathew, for a long time even if I ever did manage to get away from the Hearts.

There are so many people caught up, so many people hurt, just so the Hearts can get ‘back at’ Mathew for leaving them over a decade ago…

I have no idea how some people can be so cruel, I’ve never been able to understand it.

The door to the pack’s bedroom opens and I jump to my feet, feeling awkward for sitting in the hallway like some lost puppy. Even though I feel exactly like that, a lost puppy who doesn’t know where he belongs, where he’s supposed to be.

Vera steps into the hallway, her puffy and red-rimmed eyes falling on me, a short spark brightening them, until she glances away, her gaze dulling. She looks guilty, like she’s somehow the one who put me through all of this horror, when she’s as much a victim of the Hearts as I am.

It’s not her fault. None of this is her fault. This pain I feel is not her fault…

I reach out to her, wanting to hold her, desperate to hold her, take away the agony in her eyes.

But when her soft honey pheromones reach me, darkness settles in my mind and my heart races in terror, my pheromones going even deeper bitter, my body shaking.

How can I want to be with her, be as close as possible to her, and so afraid of her at the same time?

It hurts.

It hurts so much .

“I’m sorry.” Her quiet words reach me and I want to tell her again that she’s got nothing to apologise for, but no words come out. My throat constricted.

I hope she understands that I want nothing more than to be able to be close to her, that I want nothing more than to be able to hold her, without everything going wrong.

When we talked out on the balcony, before my family arrived, I could be near her, even if it wasn’t close enough to touch her, but it was still nice. But inside the house, pheromones are stronger, more concentrated, which means we have to keep more distance… We can’t even be in the same room.

The only two people from the pack that I can be around without problems are Riley, the female Alpha who seems much too familiar with my situation, and Jorge, the male Alpha who immediately wrapped me in his pheromones when we first met.

Mathew too, in some ways, but that’s more because he lacks pheromones. When I do catch them, they might not set my fear off like Vera and Caleb’s do, but it still isn’t good for my mind. Too many memories, too much pain, too much trauma.

Someone comes up the stairs and I automatically take a step back, trying to go up into the walls of the hallway —an automatic response from years of training— until I notice it’s one of the Alphas who helped my family, the less scary one of the two in charge.

Vera goes up to him, alert. “Any more information?”

“Not that I know, but check with Mathew or Derrick, I’ve mostly been shackled to my computer since we came back.

” He looks to me, slightly smiling. “Which is why I’m here.

I’ve got a new phone for you. It’s clean.

All of our numbers are already on it.” He comes over, holding out a brand new phone, much newer than the model I used to have.

“Thanks.” I force the word out as I stare at it, not really believing it yet. “What about...” I gave my old phone to Eli, the Omega who helped get the kids and me to the house, he said that he needed to make sure I couldn’t be tracked through it. That is was for our safety.

The Alpha nods. “Of course, you’ll get the old one back too. As soon as I’ve got time, I’ll make sure that it can’t be used in any malicious way, and you’ll get it back.”

I quickly shake my head. “I don’t need it back. But there are...” There are things on it that I don’t want to lose.

“I’ll sit down with you to get anything you want from it. Does that sound good?”

“Yes. Thank you.” I glance up, finding Vera staring at me.

Wait, if her number is on the phone, we can talk without having to be near each other.

I swallow hard. That’s actually...

That’s actually good!

I unlock the phone, trying to locate the messaging app, but not spotting it.

“This one.” The Alpha points to one of the icons, then he steps past me. “I’m going to check on your family. I’ll get them clean phones as soon as possible too.”

I nod, tapping on the app he pointed at and a whole bunch of names appear. Looking through them for Vera’s number, I spot the name ‘Timothy’ and realise that’s the name of the Alpha who gave me the phone. I should probably try to remember that.

Timothy is the slightly less scary one, Derrick is the scary one. And Eli is their Omega. I think I got that right.

Then I click on Vera’s name and then send a simple message, feeling embarrassed. ‘Hello.’

Vera’s pheromones flare, making my hands shake, and I stumble back a step. I’d almost calmed down. Between Timothy’s steady cinnamon scent and Vera sending out soothing pheromones, I’d almost calmed down, but I’m now back on high-alert.

Fuck...

‘Welcome home.’ Her reply makes my heart skip and brings tears to my eyes. When I look at her, she’s quickly wiping at her cheeks.

She’s so cute.

Fuck the Hearts, for messing me up like this.

‘I’m going downstairs. They need me. But feel free to message me whenever you feel like it.’ She gives me a small wave before going down the stairs. Her footsteps stop and a new message comes in. ‘I want you to message me. I want to be able to talk to you, no matter how. I want it.’

Then her footsteps fade away, just like her honey scent.

Instinctively, I take a step after her, but then stop. It’s no use trying to follow her when we can’t be near each other. Messaging is a much better idea.

She’s right. If this is how we can talk without things going bad, then this is how we’ll have to talk for now. It’s better than nothing, and it’s definitely better than either of us having to be in pain.

‘I will.’ I smile slightly, remembering how she looked wearing the shirt I just gave to Jorge. ‘You look cute in that shirt.’

My cheeks flash with heat, and I quickly put the phone away. Well, no matter how badly I react to her pheromones, that doesn’t stop my body from reacting to her in much more positive ways when her pheromones aren’t involved.

I follow Timothy to the rooms where my family is staying. My parents, two of my siblings and my little nephew.

Before tonight, I had no idea I’d become an uncle. While I don’t want to bring this up to my sister, I’m pretty sure I know who the little boy’s father is.

My sister had gotten involved with some bad people. Her kind heart abused by them, especially by one of them. I tried anything to get her out, but in the end, the only way I could was by giving myself up instead.

That’s how I got involved with the Hearts. They had their grip on my sister, their control over her tightening day by day, and the only way to protect her, to make sure that they would never contact her again, was to offer myself up.

Now, knowing she was already pregnant at the time, I’m more glad than ever that I did. I don’t want to consider what they would have done to her if the Hearts had found out about the pregnancy back then.

My older brother comes over, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

“I’m so happy you’re alive and look well.

After all those years, I never wanted to believe that.

..” He swallows hard, letting out a tight breath.

“I’d always hoped we’d find you some day.

And here you are.” He pulls me tighter against him and I lean into his embrace.

I want to tell him how glad I am that they’re all alive and that they seem to be doing well, but no words come out. Not that Leo needs words, he simply holds me tightly.

“We looked for you everywhere. The police got involved. The media. We posted about you on social media. But nobody could find you. You were gone. Vanished without a trace.” His voice is lower, quieter, making sure only I can hear him. “What happened? Where were you?”

No guilt. No accusations. A simple plea for explanations. For closure. For something to make sense of the situation.

I was right here, under their noses, but the Hearts are great at making you disappear if they don’t want anyone to find you. They did station me at a few other locations over time, but most of the time, they kept me in the same place I’ve always been, the same city.

And, once they found out I was a scent match for Mathew, they kept me in the same exact building I’ve been in for years. I was never far. Which made it all the more painful.

I want to explain everything, but at the same time, I don’t want to relive any of it. From how Vera, her pack and some of the people working for Mathew have reacted, they know what I’ve been through. Or at least enough that they don’t ask questions.

But my family has no idea. My family doesn’t have any connection to that world. And I want to keep it that way.

I don’t want them to know all the painful things.

I don’t want to hurt them.

I’ll come up with something, some explanation, a softer version of the truth. But not tonight.

Not tonight.