Page 23 of Howl for Me (Moonlight Magic Studios #1)

Chapter Twenty One

Johnny

I’m pacing just outside the house, hands balled into fists, blood still smeared across my knuckles.

I can smell him on me. That piece of shit, Hugo.

If they hadn't dragged me off him, I would’ve ripped his fucking throat out.

And I don’t regret it, not even a little.

I’m about to go back in, consequences be damned, when the door opens.

She walks out, the look on her face cutting me to pieces.

My mate. Her lip is swollen, split. I see it in the glow of the porch light and it makes my chest burn like someone poured gasoline on my ribs and lit a match.

“You sure you’re okay?” I ask, voice low, jaw tight.

She nods and walks toward me, soft, careful, like she’s not sure she should. I can see her hesitation, and I want nothing more than to pull her into me and whisper that I’ve got her now, that no one’s ever touching her like that again.

But then..

“We need to get you out of here right now.”

Naomi barrels out like a freight train and grabs me by the arm.

“Before Hector finds out. What the hell were you thinking?” Her nails bite into my skin like talons, dragging me back toward the driveway.

I look past her, right at Cassidy. Her expression shifts.

She deflates, just a little. But I see it.

I want to scream, no, it's not what it looks like, don’t walk away, please don’t believe for a second that I don’t care.

Naomi turns to her, voice still fierce. “Are you okay? That fucking sicko had it coming.”

Cassidy gives a small smile. “I’m okay, really.”

God, she’s so damn brave. I want to tear the world apart just to keep her safe. Naomi’s already pulling me again. “We need to go. Hector’s going to lose his shit if he finds you here.”

“Too fucking late.” Hector’s voice hits like a whip. He steps around the corner. His glare is straight fire as he walks up, jaw clenched so hard I swear I hear teeth grinding.

“What the fuck was that, Johnny?” he barks.

He’s in my face before I can answer. “I told you not to fuck up, and you fucked up in a big way. You want to ruin everything we’ve been working for? Huh?” I open my mouth, ready to defend myself, but Cassidy steps forward.

“It wasn’t his fault.”

Hector turns, mid-rage, as she continues. “That guy, Hugo, followed me into the bathroom. He tried to force himself on me. Johnny stopped him. He saved me.”

Silence.

Hector blinks, his jaw loosening. Then he exhales and turns to Cass. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” His voice drops, suddenly respectful. “I’ll make sure Hugo’s dealt with. Immediately.”

I don’t miss the flash of feral behind his eyes when he says it.

He turns back to me, sighs, and shakes his head.

“One more shot, Johnny. That’s it. You better show up on time for the shoot tomorrow.

And you better be fucking perfection. You hear me?

If it weren’t for Cassidy sticking up for your sorry ass, I’d have tossed you tonight. ”

Cass puts her hand on his arm. “He’ll be there. You can count on it.”

I swallow hard, still staring at her. I don’t deserve her. Hector narrows his eyes at me one last time, then jerks his chin toward the street. “Fine. Get the fuck out of here.” He walks away and I reach for her.

“Come with me.”

She blinks, caught off guard. “It’s okay. I can get a ride.”

“Cass,” I cut her off, softer this time. “Please.”

She hesitates, eyes flicking to Naomi like she needs permission. Naomi’s already a step ahead.

“I’ll catch a ride,” she says, like its nothing. “Go.”

Cass still looks confused, but after a long pause, she walks toward me and we get in the car.

The ride is silent, unbearably silent. I grip the wheel tighter than I should. I keep glancing over at her, but she’s looking out the window. “I’m sorry,” I finally say.

She doesn’t say anything back. And I hate it. Not her silence, just not knowing what she’s thinking. Not knowing if I ruined everything by being who I am. We get to my place, and as soon as I unlock the door; she walks in like a ghost.

“I just need to lie down,” she mumbles, already moving down the hall.

But I can’t let her go. Not yet. I catch her wrist and pull her gently toward me.

“Cass…” I say, and when she turns, I cup her face in my hands.

Her skin’s warm, soft beneath my fingers, and it only makes the tightness in my chest worse when I look at her lip.

It’s not as bad as I feared, but it doesn’t matter.

I saw him touch her all night. I heard her cry out. I should’ve killed him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t ask you to come with me,” I say, my voice low. “I just assumed you would. I assumed you’d be there…with me. That wasn’t fair.”

She nods, but still won’t look at me.

I tilt her face slightly, eyes searching hers. “Cass… look at me.”

Her gaze finally lifts and I feel it; that static pull between us. The invisible current, too strong to ignore.

“I’m sorry,” I say again. “For all of it.”

“It’s okay. Really.”

It’s not. But she says it like she means it.

I’m still holding her face, and her lips are right there, parted just enough for me to notice how wrecked she looks, how exhausted and beautiful and untouchable she feels in this moment.

I don’t want it to end. I don’t want to pull myself from the way she’s looking at me right now.

This is going to change everything, but… fuck it.

“Can I kiss you?” I ask, because I won’t make another mistake with her. Not this time. She looks at me, then at my mouth. Then back at me.

“Yes,” she whispers.

I press my lips to hers, soft and slow, every ounce of me pouring into that kiss.

Even though I want more. Even though the way she sighs into me almost undoes the last thread of control I have, I keep it tender.

Because she deserves tenderness, especially after what that asshole did to her lip.

Because this kiss isn’t about me, it’s about her.

I pull back, just enough to breathe her in, to look into her eyes and say the truth I should’ve said weeks ago.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” I admit, my thumb brushing her cheek. “I should’ve said something. I was wrong for staying quiet.”

That’s when she steps back. Just a few inches. But it feels like a chasm.

“What are we doing, Johnny?” she asks, her voice tight. Uncertain.

“We’re being honest,” I say, jaw clenched. “Or at least I am. I want you, Cass. I’ve felt it since the first damn day. I tried to fight it, I really did, but I don’t care anymore.”

Her lips part, like she wants to say something, to stop me, but she doesn’t.

“This can’t happen,” she finally says, quiet but firm. “Not with the tight line you’re walking after tonight. Hector is this close to pulling your contract, Johnny. If he finds out about this…about us... he won’t stand for it.”

I take a step closer. “Fuck Hector. Fuck the contract. I’m not asking about him. I’m asking you. How do you feel about me?”

She flinches like I struck something raw inside her. “It doesn’t matter…”

“How do you feel about me, Cass?”

“I like you, okay?” she snaps, eyes flashing. “There. I said it.”

I feel my heartbeat thunder against my ribs.

“I like being around you,” she continues, softer now, like the truth costs her something. “When I’m with you, I don’t want to leave. That kiss? That’s something I’ve wanted for a long time. And it scares me, Johnny, because your soul is on the line. Hector won’t hesitate to take it, and then what?”

I exhale, shaking my head, stepping close enough that I can feel the warmth of her again.

“I don’t care,” I tell her. “My soul saw yours the first day we met. You don’t understand, Cass, I lost my soul that day. It belongs to you now.”

Her eyes shimmer, her head shaking like she’s trying to push my words away. “That’s too much.”

“Is it?” I ask. “Because I can pretend it’s not. If that’ll make you happy. I can pretend I’m not completely in love with you. I can play it cool. I can act like this is nothing but a crush or a fling, if that makes this easier for you.”

She doesn’t answer. She just stands there, eyes wide and wet, like everything inside her is unraveling.

“But I need you to know something,” I say, voice low, steady. “You’re my mate. My heart? That’s yours. And there’s nothing I can do about that.” I pause.

“So if you want me to pretend…” I force a small, crooked smile. “Then fine, I’ll take this as slow as you need me to,” I say. “But I’m not going anywhere. And I don’t give a fuck about Hector.”

She smiles, soft and sad. “I don’t need you to pretend,” she whispers. “I just need you to understand.”

My jaw tightens. “Understand what? What is there to understand? I want you and you want me. Why can’t that happen? Why are you making this so difficult?”

Her smile fades, and the heat behind her eyes turns sharp, angry and wounded.

“Because, Johnny,” she says, voice shaking, “do you understand that I’ll lose my job?

That you could lose your soul? And I don’t even think either of us really understands what that means.

You can say you don’t care, but what if that means he takes you from me? Then what?”

She swallows hard, and I feel every inch of her pain like a knife in my ribs.

“I’d rather have you like it was before,” she continues, her voice cracking, “than risk losing you completely. So yeah, we can be honest tonight. We can say what we feel. But that’s it. We have to leave it there.”

I feel my body tense. My fists clench at my sides.

“This can’t happen,” she whispers. “I’m sorry.”

She takes a shaky breath, her hands fidgeting at her sides like she’s trying to keep herself from falling apart. “This is just how my life is. I finally found someone that makes me feel like I want all those things I’ve always run from, and I can’t have him.”

Her voice breaks completely then, and the tears spill down her cheeks.

I step toward her without thinking. I can't stand there and do nothing when she’s unraveling in front of me.

I pull her in gently, resting my forehead to hers.

I know she’s right. God, it kills me, but she is.

It’s not fair. It’s not fair to let ourselves fall into this when Hector could rip me away from her at any moment.

When the cost of being with her might be leaving her behind, unprotected and alone.

And that? That’s a risk I can’t live with.

“Then fine,” I whisper. “Let me kiss you one more time. We’ll go back to what we were before. But that won’t change how I feel.”

I tip her chin up, brush my thumb under her eye where a tear’s just clinging there.

“You’re mine, Cass. Never doubt that.”

And this time, she kisses me. There’s nothing hesitant about it.

No fear. No holding back. She kisses me like it’s the last time we’ll ever have, like she’s trying to burn the memory of my mouth into her soul.

Her hands are in my hair, her body pressed against mine, and all the ache I’ve tried to bury tears through my chest like wildfire.

It’s a kiss that feels like goodbye.

And it wrecks me.