Page 12 of Homesick, Lovesick (Harper Valley Witch #3)

He woke up to the sound of Benny's strident voice, and jerked up. Damn it, had Match let him sleep on and on, forcing himself to stay awake? He glanced belatedly at his watch, which said it was a little after seven in the morning. When he'd gone to bed it had been a little after one. No way they should be here already, with prep work, a five-hour drive at least, probably longer, and then hiking out to them. Well, driving, 'cause he didn't doubt Benny had in fact come in on four wheelers.

Climbing out of bed, he stepped from the tent and looked around. Yeah, four wheelers. Five of them, and could seat two apiece. Benny, Traci, Minerva, and a dude he didn't recognize, but who was clearly a cop by his black and purple uniform.

Ronan had never entirely liked cops. He'd seen far too many of them be entirely too buddy buddy with people like his parents. And he hadn't forgotten the way they'd been treated while that dirtbag mayor had been trying to oust Match. But cops were important, because if the Guard had to handle all the petty ass bullshit like bickering neighbors and kids doing dumb pranks with magic, they'd never get any of their real work done.

This one didn't give off asshole vibes, though.

"Hey,"

he said, then cleared his throat and tried again.

"Hey, nerds!"

They all turned around, and Traci shrieked before bolting over and hugging him tightly.

"Hey, Ro. Sorry if we woke you. How are you feeling?"

"Homesick, honestly."

He hugged her back just as tightly, then slowly let go.

"How did you guys get here so fast? You should barely be finished driving with all that stupid construction."

Benn scoffed.

"Driving, please. I called in a favor, and we took a helicopter."

"A…you…a fucking helicopter?"

"Yep. Landed close to the camp—with permission and everything, I didn't skip that part, don't give me that look—and immediately set to work. Penny is supervising the people I called to take care of your car. I related everything you told me to Minerva and some of the others."

His face said he wasn't terribly impressed with most of them.

"I also told the police. Two of them stayed behind at the camp to start questioning people and looking into things. One is retrieving the tent you had to leave behind. And Officers Lockley and Thomas came with us. We just arrived a few minutes ago. We were about to wake you up. Would have been here sooner, but meeting up with everyone at camp and coordinating how to get out here to you took some time. Sorry you couldn't sleep longer."

"It's fine. I'll crash when we're home. Where's Match?"

"He went with Officer Thomas to examine the golem. Poor thing,"

Benny said, looking angry and sad. His first kill, the one that had definitively made him a paladin, had been a rabid golem. He had a soft spot for them, and always did his best to get them home rather than kill them, no matter if it took them hours to do it. He glared across the clearing where Marvin and Lynwood sat like their whole world was ending. Fucking good.

Minerva looked somber, and twenty years older, as she faced Ronan.

"Apologies aren't enough, Ronan, but I do apologize for the behavior of my son. I did not authorize such things, I did not know about them, which is a failing all its own, and I am deeply, deeply sorry they violated and endangered you that way. I am ashamed to call Lynwood my son right now, but his failings are my responsibility, and I won't shirk them. He'll be properly punished, and recompense paid."

"I don't need recompense, I'm well aware that just because some of a family is shitty doesn't mean the whole family is shitty. I'm sorry he let you down in such an awful way."

"You're kind."

She touched his arm lightly, then strode across the clearing to crouch down and speak with Lynwood.

Ronan turned back to Benny.

"I don't understand why. I mean, Lynwood I sort of get. He wanted to impress Match, I think, while also making me look bad. Not sure why he was so determined to hook Match, but I mean, I get being crazy about him. Not that crazy, but…"

It was Officer Lynley who said, "I can't really say much as it's an ongoing investigation, but it seems to me there's a lot of politics and internal turmoil at play…"

He shrugged.

"May I examine your arm?"

Ronan stripped off his fleece hoodie and held out his right arm. Lynley touched a tattoo on the back of his right hand and pressed it to the scar much like Match had hours ago, and a faint orange light emitted from it before fading again. He snapped several pictures with a small camera he pulled from a pocket.

"Confirmation of both a draw spell and a time spell."

He put the camera away, pulled out a small notebook, and jotted several things down. After he was done writing, he put the notebook away and pulled a laptop from the bag on the ground. Once he'd opened it and logged in or whatever, he said, "So tell me the whole of the tale from your perspective. Every last, seemingly stupid detail you can think of."

Ronan sorely wanted a cup of coffee first, but the idea of a random cup of coffee that could have come from anywhere just made him tense, so instead he grabbed his water bottle from his tent really quick and then told the whole sordid tale. He started with meeting Lynwood and went through to tying the bastards up and going the fuck to bed.

When he was done, he was ready to crawl back into bed. Or just sleep right there on the ground, he genuinely didn't care.

"Thank you, I'm sorry you had to do that,"

Lynley said.

"Sit down, get some rest. I might have more questions as this goes along, but for now just relax."

He walked off toward the group across the clearing, and Ronan looked around for something halfway decent to sit on.

"Hang on,"

Benny said with a grin.

"I came prepared!'

Ronan smiled.

"Of course you did."

Whistling cheerfully, Benny went to the four wheelers and with Traci's help, soon had improved their campsite by miles. Chairs, a little grill, coolers. Ronan hadn't even noticed until now that two of the four wheelers had little trailers on them. Of course they did. Benny was nothing if not thorough, and a chance to grill outside? Comfort his stressed, unhappy friends? He'd probably run to the grocery store and left Traci to do most of the other packing, the dork.

Just as Benny was taking hotdogs and hamburgers off the grill, Match and Thomas returned.

"You're awake!"

Match said.

"I was hoping they'd let you sleep, but I guess that wasn't possible."

Ronan stood and caught him up in a tight hug, kissed him briefly.

"What did you do with the golem?"

"Burned it, poor thing, but it will go to the forest now, which is something."

Match yawned.

"Food smells awesome. What did you do, Benny, bring an entire pantry?"

"Obviously. Figured we'd be out here with the questioning and stuff for a bit, and that you'd like better than whatever freeze dried bullshit you've been eating."

"Amen,"

Ronan said.

Benny went into the cooler and pulled out a can of Ronan's favorite iced coffee. Well, as canned iced coffees went.

"Here, looks like you could use it."

"I could use straight caffeine in an IV drip. Thanks."

He popped the tab and drank a third of it straight down.

"That's fantastic."

Grinning, pleased, Benny pulled out a fruity green tea thing for Match and handed it over.

"Food's ready. Unorthodox breakfast, but I figured you wouldn't care."

"I do not care remotely. It smells awesome."

Also fighting the way he had, and all the magic Match had used, had burned serious calories. Burgers, hot dogs, potato salad, macaroni salad, and so much more all sounded goddamn perfect, even if it was way too early in the morning.

"Thanks for doing so much, Benny."

Benny scoffed.

"Like I don't love feeding people, and I look after my team anyway."

He kissed Traci as she came up to him, then filled a plate for her and playfully swatted her ass as she went to sit down.

By the time Ronan had finished round two and was going for three, the cops were coming back over to them.

"We're all finished here. Gonna transport those two back to headquarters for booking. You're free to go. We'll call if we have further questions."

Lynley ripped a sheet of paper from his little notebook.

"Here's the case number, our names, should appear in the system after about seventy-two hours."

When they'd gone, Ronan sighed and went back to his food.

"Still wish I knew why they did it."

"Desperation,"

Traci said.

"Penny has been digging. Apparently that bitch with the really ugly, ostentatious ring—"

"Carmen."

Benny cast her an amused look.

"I kept calling her Diamond in my head until I knew her name,"

Ronan said.

"It really was an ugly ring. Like, people like what they like, I guess, but I'm judging her anyway."

Traci snickered.

"Anyway, there's apparently talk of her territory being absorbed into Minerva's. The three Guards watching over it, headed by Carmen, haven't been doing a great job, and Minerva's Guard needs more help. That they had to call in outside help for something as important as wards makes that painfully clear. Carmen also has a lot of complaints lodged against her, and her job security wasn't looking great if the merger went through."

"So…they thought drugging and spelling me would accomplish…what exactly?"

Benny finished eating the last bite of his burger, then said, "As you already surmised, that was to get you out of the way and also make Lynwood look like a better paladin by far. Because of course that's the only reason Match loves you."

Benny rolled his eyes.

"People are so dumb. Anyway, get rid of you, convince Match to join them… Lynwood gets Match, gets all that comes from being the main squeeze of one of the best witches in the country, including forming his own Guard, and he promised Carmen and Marvin they'd be on the team."

"That is so beyond stupid, I don't know where to start,"

Match said flatly.

"I have told everyone a thousand times that I have no desire to leave Harper Valley. It's my home. It's where all my family is, going back to the town's foundation. My grandfather gave his life to give me magic, and these assholes think I'd just lightly skip off for popularity and money? I don't do this job for the money. Obviously,"

he added sourly, because yeah, he'd made next to nothing for way too fucking long.

"Nevermind what leaving would do to the town, as I tore down the wards because anyone who replaced me would have to rebuild them, and that puts everyone at risk for a long fucking time. Fuck, I can't wait to be home again, everything hurts. I can't believe they thought I'd just drop all of my family, my entire life, for speaking gigs and being popular. I'm a witch."

Benny smirked.

"Yeah, they should have offered you a gingerbread cottage in the woods and a really fancy herb garden. That might have gotten them somewhere."

"I will put you in a stew, Benny,"

Match retorted.

"You're meaty enough to make a good one."

Benny slapped his stomach with both hands.

"USDA Prime."

"Prime dumbass,"

Traci said, smacking his ass.

"Sit down and finish eating so we can pack up and go home."

"Yes, mistress,"

Benny replied cheerfully.

Traci grinned at Ronan.

"Speaking of prime, that ring is top tier. Congrats on your engagement, sorry the excitement is dampened by all this bullshit."

"Nothing could dampen my happiness that Match said yes,"

Ronan replied.

"Nobody and nothing will take that high from me."

"Dork,"

Match said, looking the happiest Ronan had ever seen him.

"Oh! Speaking of things that please me, I can't believe I forgot. Lynwood!"

Ronan wrinkled his nose.

"What about him?"

"He drugged the golem and the troll. That's why he was able to kill the troll all by himself. But he used the same poison on the golem, which wouldn't work the same because they're so different. Instead of leaving it confused and weak, it sent the poor thing in the opposite direction. That's why he didn't help you. He's a shitty ass paladin who was in over his head and pissing himself."

He sneered.

"Difference between nepotism and properly training your successor, I guess. So determined he was the greatest ever, but he can only kill a troll when it's drugged while my fiancé singlehandedly took down a berserked, aggroed golem. Suck on that. I wish he was here so I could say that to his face."

"You're a fucking dork,"

Ronan replied, but he was absolutely grinning through the whole rest of the meal.

Once all the food was gone, which never took them long, Ronan helped pack everything up and get it loaded. Mostly because if he held still for too long he'd fall asleep standing.

After that, it was only the driving left. He guzzled another coffee, took a quick bathroom break, and then climbed on. Match settled behind him, Benny took off to lead the way, and finally they were leaving.

If Ronan had his way, they'd never see this shitty place ever again.