Page 38 of Hockey Halloween

Kelli

Jokes are supposed to be funn y

I smiled at the Halloween decorations on the lawn as I walked up the driveway of my parents’ house.

The fake tombstones had been there since I was a kid, and they definitely looked the worse for wear.

My folks loved Halloween. I winced and corrected myself.

Mom did. Even though Dad had been gone for five years, I wasn’t used to it.

Mom had asked me to come and take care of any trick-or-treaters till she got home from the wedding expo she had a display at, since it was wrapping up today and she’d be late packing her stuff. I didn’t have any other plans for the evening, and I enjoyed seeing all the kids in their costumes.

I adjusted the red wool wig on my head. My scalp was itching after wearing it all day, but when you worked in a pediatric dentist’s office, dressing up for Halloween was required.

Other than the wig, the Raggedy Ann costume wasn’t too bad, at least as far as comfort went.

It was about as far from sexy as you could get.

The dress came down past my knees, meeting my striped socks, so I didn’t have to worry about bending over and flashing anyone.

I’d had to touch up the makeup at lunch and before I left the office so that the red dots on my cheeks and big fake lashes didn’t drip down, making me look like a melting doll.

I hoped it had survived traveling here on the subway and bus.

Dylan’s car was on the street, so he was at the house for something. What? My brother wasn’t giving out candy because he was attending a costume party with his girlfriend. Maybe Mom had helped with what he planned to wear so he’d come by to pick it up. I wanted a picture if so.

I headed to the side door, using my key to get in. Normally I’d take off my shoes, but they were part of my costume so I left them on. I headed down the basement stairs first to get the stuff Mom had asked me to find.

Her sewing room took up half the available space, with wedding dresses on a couple of mannequins. At least she was organized, so it only took me a couple of minutes to grab the seam binding tape Mrs. Han wanted to borrow and head back upstairs.

Dylan came out of Mom’s bedroom buttoning up one of Dad’s old police shirts. He was wearing the uniform pants, shoes, even had handcuffs hanging from his belt. Fortunately, he didn’t have a gun. Those had been turned in when Dad died.

“What the hell, Dyl?”

He glanced at me. “What are you doing here?”

“I told Mom I’d take care of the trick-or-treaters till she got back from the show. What are you doing in Dad’s uniform?” Dad had been proud of serving as part of the Toronto Police Service, and if Dylan was doing something stupid…

He smoothed the shirt down, tucking it into his pants. “It’s for the Halloween party.”

“I thought you were going as Barbie and Ken.” That was all his girlfriend had gone on about at our last family dinner. Not that my brother looked much like Ryan Gosling, but beyond the blonde hair, she didn’t look like Margot Robbie either.

“Lisa found out someone else is dressing up as Barbie and Ken. So she’s going as a sexy prisoner and I’m the cop arresting her.” He picked up the handcuffs and spun them around his finger .

I blinked. A sexy prisoner? Like a prostitute? I bit back a snort. “Did Mom say it was okay?” I couldn’t imagine she’d be happy about Dylan using Dad’s uniform like that. I sure as hell wasn’t.

The doorbell rang before he could answer.

He paused in tucking in the shirt. “That can’t be Mom.” His eyes were sliding around, and damn it, he must have tried to sneak in to get the uniform when he knew no one was home. It had to be guilt bothering him, because Mom wouldn’t be ringing the bell.

I was tempted to let him worry but he’d soon see who it was. “It must be Mrs. Han. Mom asked me to get some seam binding for her.” I passed by him to open the door.

Dylan followed me. “You gonna ask her about Laaarrry?” He stretched out the name.

I turned and poked his chest. “No, and you aren’t either.” When I was a kid and Dylan discovered my crush on Larry Han he’d made my life miserable with teasing. I’d hid anytime Larry came over to birthday parties at our place. “Or I’ll stuff those handcuffs in your mouth to shut you up.”

I pasted a smile on my face to greet my mother’s old friend. But when I opened the door, it wasn’t Mrs. Han. It was Larry himself.

I froze, limbs stiff while my heart doubled its beat.

Larry fucking Han. Time had been good to him.

He’d been one of the shorter boys in Dylan’s class back in school, but now he was close to six feet tall and one hundred and ninety pounds, give or take.

I might have followed his hockey career and memorized his stats.

But I’d never run into him since he was drafted, even though his parents lived a block away.

“Hey, Lair.” My brother wasn’t tongue-tied. But who knew what he might say?

I squared my shoulders, reminded myself I was a grown-ass woman, and opened my mouth. “Hi, Hanny. Um, Larry.” I was glad my cheeks were already painted red to cover my blush. And damn it, I was meeting Larry Han as a grown-up and I was wearing a Raggedy Ann costume. FML.

“Watcha doing here anyway? Looking for a party?” Why did my brother have to be at home right now ?

“Hi, Dylan, Ann.” Larry had a little smirk which shouldn’t look so good on him, but yeah, it did. “I have a problem with my costume, so my mother’s fixing it.”

I elbowed Dylan in the ribs. “Mom said you needed seam binding?” I held out the bundle in my hand. He reached for it, but my fingers weren’t cooperating and I had to force them to let go.

Dylan moved up beside me, avoiding my elbows.

“Sure you don’t want to come in? Ann here would love to talk to you.

” I flipped around, furious with my stupid brother.

I reached for the handcuffs, ready to follow through with my threat to shut him up.

Grinning evilly, he snapped one end around my arm.

And then locked the other end to Larry’s wrist.

For a moment I just stared. My left wrist was locked to Larry’s right one. Larry gave a tug on his end. My arm jerked in response.

“Dylan, what the fuck are you doing?” he asked, voice flat but tension underneath.

Dylan laughed. “Just a little joke. Kelli had a crush on you back in school and used to peek at us when we played games here, like Seven Minutes in Heaven. Thought I’d finally let her have her chance.”

I dug a finger into his ribs, where he was the most ticklish. “I’m going to kill you, Dylan. Get the fucking cuffs off!”

My brother stepped back, but I couldn’t follow him because I was handcuffed to the man standing in the doorway.

My brother laughed again. “No problem. I’ve got the key right here.” He rolled his eyes. “Some people can’t take a joke.”

“Jokes are supposed to be funny,” I snarled. I was mortified that Dylan had shared those things about me. I would never be able to look Larry in the face. Assuming I ever saw him again.

Dylan slid his hand in the pocket of Dad’s pants. Why did he have the keys there? What was he hoping to do with the handcuffs? Eeeww… I was so telling Mom.

He pulled out the key and I reached for it. I didn’t trust him not to prolong this and embarrass me further. He jerked his hand back, losing his grip on the key. I tried to grab it, but I couldn’t move while I was tied to Larry, standing behind me .

The key fell to the floor, bounced, and slid, hitting the edge of the heating grate and popping up just enough to drop between the slats and disappear from view.

For long seconds my brother and I stared at the grate.

Larry stepped up beside me. “What just happened?”

Dylan’s mouth was hanging open. The idiot.

“Dylan just dropped the key into the furnace.”

“Not my fault.” He raised his hands and stepped back.

So whose fault did he think it was?

“Have you got another?” Larry’s voice was tense.

“I’ll check.” Dylan headed for the bedroom and I followed, Larry dragging behind me.

My stupid fucking brother.