Page 20 of His Wicked Little Christmas
“I can feel your thoughts churning,” he whispered when she believed he’d slipped to sleep, a feat he accomplished quicker than anyone she’d ever known. Turning on his side to face her, he mirrored her posture, head in hand, gaze drowsy but steady. “I’ll pay a halfpenny for them but no more. That’s my final offer.”
“I think I’ve misled my apprentices,” she blurted, then hoped she’d recover without admitting what she was feeling. Too much, too befuddled, too jumbled. And Dex would pounce on her confession like a starved lion.
A tiny dent flowed between his brows. Another fascinating thing she’d noticed, this worrying dink. “How so, Georgie girl?”
Her gaze roamed the rug with the tattered edge, the ceiling with the spider crack, the narrow slice of moonlight shooting through a grimy windowpane. The manor she’d leased wasn’t in the best condition, but she loved it, was cozy and happy and satisfied.
But she feared her happiness was all due to Dex.
“Uh-huh.” He tipped her chin until her gaze had nothing to do but return to him. “How so?”
His quiet way of listening had proven hazardous to her secrets, encouraging her to tell him everything about her disaster of a marriage, her resentment toward her father for putting her in such a position, her hopes for the Duchess Society.Everything.
Except for theI-love-youpart.
“I didn’t know it could be like this, I could be like this,” she murmured. “I had such bitterness in my heart and my view that my marriage was representative when perhaps it was not, and now I’ve unintentionally provided erroneous guidance. Toxic guidance even. A veritable Ice Countess releasing venom on society. A bad example, when I never imagined I would be, tainting what I touch.”
“I didn’t know it could be like this, either. Therefore you’re forgiven.” His tone was impassive, hard to decipher. His lids drifted low like they did when he wanted to hide his feelings. “You’re realizing what we have. But I can see from the firm set of your lovely jaw you’re still set to make us pay for Arthur’s mistakes. Me, especially, when I’d kick the man’s arse from here to Piccadilly if he still took air. It’s ludicrous the statutes you’re imposing but my hands, as they were last night against these very bedposts, are tied.”
A bitter gust raced in the open window and drifted across their skin, still moist from loving each other this eve. Twice, in relatively rapid succession. Georgiana shivered, Dex cursed. With a twist, he yanked the counterpane from the bed and tossed it none too gently over her.
She pulled her head out from beneath the coverlet, blew a strand of hair from her face. “What would you have me do, Dex?”
He snorted, his eyes when they met hers flashing with fury. Banked to the color of a fallen tree, a dozen shades of brown and black. His palm slapped the floor as he reared to a sit. “Really, Countess Winterbourne? Shall I go down on one kneeagain?”
“You haven’t gone down onanyknee, Dex. You’ve only suggested what I should do, in your opinion. Always in your opinion. When you know I’m confused. When you know I used to do anything you asked of me, which is part of the problem. You expect my compliance, demand it even. Come along, Georgie girl, and do what I request of you. Don’t think about it because I’ve done the thinking for you!”
He stilled, considering what she’d said. It broke her heart, made her love him more. She’d never known another man who actuallylistened. “Had I asked for your hand all those years ago, would you have said yes?”
Her breath caught as they stared, unable to look away from each other. This was a dream she’d once wished for, prayed for.Oh, if only…if only… Beneath the counterpane, her hand tightened into a fist.
In the end, she nodded, the silent admission ripped from her.
“A most remarkable blunder.” His oath was violent. “My hands are still shaking,” he said and held them out so she could see them trembling. “Just so you know, I’d stalk right from this chamber to fully communicate my despondency if my legs would hold me.”
“I’m not in any better shape to bring you back like I did last night.” But his apology, offered on the sweeping staircase leading to her bedchamber, had beendelightful.
He slumped against the bedpost, head hanging, throat flexing. “You’re leaving tomorrow, Georgie. I know I agreed to this, but I’m starting to panic.”
She licked her lips, crimping the counterpane’s frilled seam between her fingers. “What if you came to visit me occasionally?—”
“What about my wife? That silly duchess person.” He made an inane gesture, an insult to his future spouse. “Do I bring her as well? Tell her not to worry as we’re childhood friends-turned-lovers. Pay no mind, darling, everyone in thetondoes it. Very progressive, this marriage. No fault of yours it’s with the wrong woman.”
Georgiana pressed the heel of her hand to her belly, forcing back the queasiness rippling through her. “Oh, God.” She drew her knees up, dropped her cheek to them. “That won’t work. I’ll scratch her eyes out if I get within reach.”
The silence thumped like a heartbeat between them. They’d done this before, waited out the hush until one of them broke. Usually her. She was finding Dex to be extremely hard of head and steady of mind. A log snapped in the hearth, a mantel clock counted off the seconds. The scent of lavender and sandalwood, smoldering birch and mating bodies, filtered in and gave her heart a hard twist.
“You’re not really going to leave, are you?” he finally asked in a stark murmur.
She rolled her head to look at him just as he lifted his to look at her. His eyes were losing their acidity and sliding back to a pale, approachable hue. “I have an interview with the Earl of Nottenworth’s daughter in four days. Camilla is beautiful and temperamental and practically abandoned by her family. Her father has gambled away the fortune. Her brother, Vincent, is an absolute bounder. She cannot enter the upcoming Season without support. She simply cannot.”
A muscle in Dex’s jaw flexed. “Your support.”
“Mine and Hildy’s.” Her partner, Hildegard Templeton, had agreed to manage the Duchess Society while Georgiana traveled for the holiday but this was a temporary arrangement. Georgiana’s temper sparked as Dex continued to stare as if his searing gaze would change her mind. They were naked, after all, and it had happened before. “Why is your surveying so important, all those blessed fossils, every split of rock from here to India, when my work is not? Is it because I’m a woman? Please enlighten me, Dex. I’d love to hear why my career, unique though it may be, is not valuable to society when yours is.”
His top lip canted, escalating her irritation. She’d no idea why her displeasure often made him smile. “I have an idea, Georgie girl.”
“Oh,” she whispered and dug her face into her knees. Dex’s ideas were legendary. Legendary debacles. Like the time they’d spent the night in one of those limestone caves he cherished after misjudging the daylight and getting lost. It had been exciting, a remarkable adventure, even as she’d questioned if they’d make it home. It was one of her fondest memories of Anthony. Her brother had laughed as the darkness rushed in on them, fearless, the most daring man, aside from Dex, she’d ever known.