Page 35 of His Stolen Duchess (Stolen by the Duke #7)

Chapter Twenty-Nine

G eorgina took deep breaths as she walked along the halls of their townhouse. She was looking for Lysander, but had been unable to spot him anywhere. The residence was not gigantic, but she was having a difficult time finding him, as though he didn’t want to be found.

She tried not to think about the lake incident earlier that day. She had been trapped in the middle of the lake with two options. Either tread water until she ran out of energy and drowned, or make her way back to the shore where the masked men stood.

You don’t need to worry about that anymore. They weren’t there for you; it was only bad luck that you were using the lake.

Still, all three men had approached her while she swam, and she shuddered to think what might have happened to her if Lysander had not gotten there in time. They were there to burgle the house, and they wouldn’t have let her escape to get help.

That was part of the reason she needed to find Lysander. She felt much safer in his company. She looked around the hallway she’d walked down. Of course, she was safe now, but she wouldn’t truly feel it until she was in his arms again. She didn’t want to leave his side.

When she reached the library and looked in, she saw him with his back turned to her, looking out of the window and into the darkness outside. She stepped into the room, seeing his reflection in the glass, but he didn’t notice her enter.

She stood there for a while, looking at his broad back. She smiled as she thought about the way he had dealt with all three men by himself. She didn’t entertain violence as an option, but it had been called for by their nefarious actions.

The same strong arms that had taken down those men were the same ones in which she would soon be wrapped.

Georgina went to him, placing her hand on his back.

Lysander immediately jumped and spun around. Georgina stepped back, worried he might accidentally swing at her after the events of that morning.

“It’s me,” she soothed.

Lysander took one look at her and stepped away from the window. He paced toward the bookshelf on the west wall, then turned and headed for the door.

“Lysander,” she said. “Please don’t go. I never got a chance to thank you properly for what happened this morning. If it wasn’t for you, who knows what might have happened to me.”

“It was a burglary,” he muttered. “You would have been fine.”

“Still, you were there, and you saved me. For that, I’m truly grateful. I don’t know what I would have done. I didn’t want to get out of the lake, but the thought of succumbing to the cold and running out of energy makes me shiver to think about it.”

“Do we have to talk about this?”

“No, of course not. I only wanted to thank you for what you did for me,” she replied. Georgina stepped towards her husband, hoping that he would finally take her in his arms and offer the comfort she had been seeking. “Seeing you fight those men. It was…”

“What?” he asked.

Fire smoldered in his eyes. She hadn’t seen it at the lake, but only because she had been too far away.

Still, from the way the men had cowered from him both during and after the fight, she knew he must have had the same blaze in him then.

That fire was back, but it was a troubling fire, as if he wanted to fight her as he had fought the burglars.

“Well, it was almost beautiful. I am no fan of violence, but they needed to be taught a lesson for attempting to take what was not theirs. What you did was justice, and I can’t help but admire that you did it so effortlessly.”

“Is that something to celebrate?”

The tone of his question clearly held two vastly different answers. Georgina thought he had accomplished something commendable, but the dour timbre of his words let her know that he thought the opposite.

“Saving me is something to celebrate, isn’t it?”

“I will always protect you, Georgina.”

Finally, some reason from you.

“But it all hinged on the speed and tenacity of a street urchin,” he finished.

“I beg your pardon?”

“I sent him to get the blacksmith. If they had returned later or it had taken longer to mend the coach, I would not have made it in time. I was only able to protect you because of others. There were two dozen things that could have hampered me. I was only able to protect you because I was lucky.”

“No,” Georgina claimed. “How can you put it like that? You saved me, Lysander. Don’t you see that?”

“And what about next time?” he asked.

“Next time?” Georgina frowned and looked at her husband as if he had grown a third ear in the middle of his forehead. “It was all a case of bad luck and good luck, wasn’t it? There won’t be a next time.”

“We cannot foretell that,” he countered. “I didn’t expect there to be a first time, so how can we discount anything else? What if I can’t save you next time, just like?—”

Georgina stepped forward, shaking her head. “No, don’t say it.” She tried to lay a hand on his shoulder, but he backed away from her. “You can’t compare this to what happened to your brother. This is not the same thing at all.”

“I was lucky,” Lysander said. “I got to you just in time. I was able to save you through good fortune. If I had swum in a different direction when looking for my brother, I might have saved him, too. Is that what it comes down to? Good luck and bad luck?”

“No, of course not.” She tried to step closer to him again, but he backed off. “All that matters is that I am safe, and we are together again. That’s the most important thing, right?”

“My brother died, and you nearly died,” the Duke said. “It doesn’t matter what I do to try to save someone; it’s not down to that. It’s down to luck and fate.”

“I didn’t almost die,” Georgina claimed.

“I’m fine. Once I became tired, I would have gone back to the shore, or maybe they would have come into the water for me before that.

They wouldn’t have killed me, though. Maybe tied me up or threatened me, but they wouldn’t have hurt me.

Everything is fine. Can’t you see that?”

“Can’t you see that everything is not fine?

” he snapped. “This arrangement was not meant to be anything other than just that: An arrangement. We were married for one reason only, and that was to have an heir. You might be with child already, but if not, I will ensure you are soon. Apart from that, we don’t need to see each other, do we? ”

“What?” Georgina gasped. “How can you say that?”

“Did you really think this would turn into something?” the Duke asked.

“You knew exactly what you were getting into, and you did so willingly. Are you so egotistical to think that you can change me? I have news for you, Duchess. I have been like this for two decades, and I’m content with who I am.

I don’t need you to come into my life and change me.

I have done just fine without you in my life.

I won’t put you in a similar situation again. ”

“You didn’t.” Georgina grimaced with the effort it took her to keep her ire under control.

She needed to keep calm so she could convince him that things really were good, but he was making it so hard.

“It was bad luck, that was all, but we can’t shut ourselves off because something bad might happen. ”

I know you still carry the pain of your brother’s death, but don’t let that stop you from having a marriage.

“But you can shut yourself off from the world. I’ve done just that for as long as I can remember, and it’s worked for me. We are not the same person, and we don’t see the world in the same way, Duchess. You and I have had vastly different lives. You can’t ever understand what I have been through.”

“No, not fully.” She reached out and took his arm, and for once, he didn’t shrug her off.

“Still, I do understand some of it after you shared it with me. You can help me understand more. I know you have pain that you’ve carried around for a long time.

That’s why you won’t let yourself get close to me, isn’t it?

Because you are afraid of losing someone you love. ”

“I’m afraid of very little, Duchess.” His blistering gaze landed on the hand that grasped his arm.

Georgina could almost feel her skin scorch and removed her hand.

“Do you really think you could walk into my life, and I would magically fall in love with you, and we would live happily ever after? That’s not how the world works, so don’t be so foolish. ”

“I’m not asking for that.” I’m wishing for that. “We can carry on as we have been. I’m not asking you to change any more than you have; I’m only asking you not to change back to who you were. We have something together, Lysander.”

“No, we don’t,” he stated.

It felt like an arrow through her heart. She took half a step back, reaching out with her arms to grab onto something and finding nothing. She staggered and almost fell, but the Duke didn’t try to catch her. He stood watching her as she struggled.

Is that what you think about us? That we have nothing? How could I have been so na?ve?

“I apologize,” she said calmly. “I can see that I’ve disturbed you when you have better things to think about. I should go.”

The Duke didn’t reply to her words. As she walked toward the door, she thought he would call out after her, but he remained cold and silent. The only sound she could hear was the echo of her own footsteps as she left the room alone. She held in her tears—she wouldn’t let him see her cry.

Maybe you don’t feel anything, but I do. I should have kept myself closed off from the world the way you have done. That would have made everything much easier.

Lysander lay awake in his bed. It was long past midnight, and the household was silent. He wondered if Georgina was asleep or if she lay awake in her bed like him. He knew he had hurt her. He had seen it written on her face as plain as day, but he had to do it to protect them both.

Every time he tried to close his eyes and find sleep, he saw his brother in the water, his arms desperately flailing before he went under. Then Georgina in the water, surrounded by masked men. He tried to think about anything else, but it was an impossibility.

It wasn’t just about losing her; it was about how that would destroy him.

Twenty years after his brother had died, he was still a shell of a man.

On the outside, he was a fighter, a good Duke, protective, even caring.

Yet, inside, he was empty. All his feelings and emotions had drowned with his brother.

No, that’s not strictly true. She has dragged some of them back to the surface, and that has become a painful reminder of what might happen again.

He couldn’t let himself get any closer to Georgina.

He hadn’t realized that until that morning at the lake.

If he had been a moment later, his heart would have been ripped from his chest. He had grown too attached to her, too fond of her.

He should have learned his lesson from his experience with his younger brother, but he had become too lax, too forgetful.

She talks about being closed off as if it were a dreadful thing. That is the only thing that has helped me to survive all these years.

They had agreed to live separate lives when the time came, and that was the best thing to do. It would protect what they had. Their marriage was fragile. It was best if it was only brought out when needed or for special occasions.

Lysander placed a hand over his chest. His heart still beat with the agony of what had almost transpired.

If he let himself fall for her, the pain would only be worse if she were taken away from him.

He could not bear the risk. He would deal with Lady Eastbeck, then he would lock away his feelings, and the less he saw his wife, the better.

Lysander took a deep breath. In a way, he was thankful for what had taken place at the lake.

He had been walking into a lake of his own feelings, unaware that there was a drop off.

If he plunged into his emotions, they’d cling to him like silt.

If he fell for her and lost her, he would not recover from it.

It’s better this way. It has to be better this way.