Page 4 of His Perfect Mistake

Arrow had made mistakes before but nothing as senseless as this. He felt like a fool. He felt childish and helpless. Even when Elina left, he had never felt this helpless. Now he had taken a complete stranger and expected her to conform into his life without even a fight. He had first thought she did not have a life and she would willingly conform to his. And he had not even asked her.

He had to tell her. Mercy deserved choices. She did not deserve this.

“Talise is my daughter. She is seven winters. Tarlo is my son. He is five summers."

She just looked at him like she wanted to hit him. “You have a family.”

“I have two children. I do not have a family.”

Her eyes narrowed. She was smart. Too smart for her own good. She knew his plan.

“You want me to take care of your children."

"No. You lost a child. I want you to be their mother.”

“You are mad.”

“I am not angry."

“No, mad.” She sighed as if greatly irritated with him. “Crazy. Why would you even think—I’m not even from the same world as you.”

“That is why I chose you. You do not know my people. I want you to assimilate with them and raise my children so that they will not be taken from me.”

“You are daft.”

She was correct. The more this foolish plan played out the more he realized how big a mistake it was. He should take her back. He would lose his children, but in reality he had already lost them months ago.

“This man does not know what to do.” Arrow hated the part of him that was exposed to her now. He had never in his life been vulnerable to a woman or to anyone. A warrior simply did not let his guard down. Ever.

There was something about this woman that made it so easy to be who he was. He did not even think about it. It just came naturally. He liked and hated that about her all at the same time.

Without thinking, he removed his knife from his belt and cut her bindings. He would take her back if she desired. “You are free to go.”

“Go where?”

“Back home."

She took a step toward him. “You’re just freeing me? Without me knowing the way?”

“Yes.”

“Is this a trap?"

“No."

“Why would you do that?”

He stared at her for a long while. “Perhaps I am not so bad after all.”

Mercy didn't know what to say. There was no way she could find her way home out here. Yet he was not going to kill her, and strangely she believed him. “How many people have you killed?"

She knew his question took him off guard. She didn't know why she asked. Perhaps because of all the stories she had heard of the bloodthirstiness of the Mohawks.

“Does it matter?"

She knew he wasn’t going to answer so she did not press the issue.

“I do not know. Too many to count.” He finally answered, taking her by complete surprise. "Does that change your opinion of me?"

“I don't know you well enough to have an opinion of you.”

“You kissed me. Does that not mean you know me well?"

“I could easily kiss a stranger and know nothing of them.”

“Do you often kiss strangers?"

“No. Besides my late husband you are the only man I have ever kissed.”

Something in his expression softened, as if that made him feel good. Perhaps she was just imagining it.

“I cannot take you home.”

“Why?”

“There is no time. I have to meet with the council when I return and we will plan our next round of attacks upon the Colonials."

“So what will happen to me?"

“You are free to come with me.”

"To be your prisoner?"

“To take care of my children."

“For how long?”

“The rest of your life."

Confusion fought with understand and Mercy felt her head spin. Arrow had just set her free. All she had to do was start walking back in the direction she came from. Could she make it? What life would she have left? John and Sarah would wonder where she had been, and the truth would frighten them. John was already wary of her reputation with dealing with the British. Something said she was a spy and should be tried for treason. Mercy didn’t even know if she still had a place of employment and a room to stay anymore. What would she do if she came home to nothing?

She would be homeless.

She had a feeling Arrow would never leave her homeless.

But taking care of another woman’s children? Children she did not even know. Not only were they complete strangers, they were from another world. A culture she did not even know anything about or understand. She would be better off facing a life of uncertainty than live as a Mohawk.

What if the others saw her as an enemy and killed her?

She stared at Arrow, met his look of uncertainty. Whether he was waiting for her answer or not she was not going to lie to him. Part of her was flattered that he had chosen her. Something coiled in her heart and she had a feeling it would stay there for as long as she lived. He had been the only man other than Trevor that she had ever kissed. She would keep it to herself in a special room in her heart, and she would think about it often and wonder what would have been had she taken him up on his offer.

She touched his bicep. It was hard, coiled with muscle. “Thank you for your offer. I am flattered, but I cannot stay with you. I have a life in German Flats. I have work there.”

His expression turned hard, and she knew she had offended him.

“I appreciate your offer. I truly do, but here is where I must bid you goodbye.” She took his hand in both of hers and without thinking--or perhaps thinking too much--she brought it up to her lips and kissed it.

She turned from him and walked back in the direction she had come.

~ * ~

Mercy’s eyes fluttered and she groaned. Her head hurt uncontrollably. Her entire body felt like dead weight. She concentrated on the sounds around her. Items being knocked together, as if someone were working around her. Two people talking. Little people. Children’s voices. They were not speaking English.

“Shh...."

More speaking in an unrecognizable language. A man’s voice. Strange but familiar.

She opened her eyes. Above her was a wooden roof with bark slats. There was a hole cut in the center where the roof peaked to a dome. She turned her head to see a small fire lightly burning nearby.

Two children quickly rushed to her side and stared down at her. Dark skinned, black eyes. The boy looked about five. His hair was shaved close to his head. The girl looked older. Her hair was a disarrayed mess.

Mercy saw them and immediately startled. She quickly sat up, sending her head spinning.

Arrow was by her side, and Mercy knew exactly where she was.

“What did you do to me?”

He looked apologetic, almost ashamed. “It was the only way you would come with me.”

Mercy saw two of him for a moment and blinked hard.

“The drug will wear off soon. Do not worry."

She swung to hit him but missed. “I told you I would not live with you so you drug and kidnap me?"

“It was only morning glory seeds. They are not fatal."

“What are you a doctor or something?”

“My mother and sister are trained in the ways of medicine.”

“You had no right.”

Mercy wanted to hit him again. She fell back down, took in a deep breath and winced. She closed her eyes, opened them to find all three of them staring down at her, only inches from her face.

“Get off me!”

They backed off and she sat up. Three sets of black eyes stared back at her. Mercy didn’t know what to do. She could get up and simply walk out of here, but what would be awaiting her outside of this lodge? Hostility? Others who also want to kidnap her?

Arrow and his children continued to stare at her. It was as if they were waiting for her next move. She should get up and leave. She had a life to get back to. Her life was not here.

Arrow said something to the girl in his native tongue. She immediately rose and brought a wooden bowl filled with something. She handed it to her father who passed it to Mercy.

“More poison to finish me off?”

“This is hominy. It is made from corn. It is good.” He pushed the bowl toward her.

Cautiously, Mercy took the bowl. She smelled the white and yellow concoction, picked a small piece between her thumb and index finger, and gingerly tasted it. It tasted sweet and buttery.

“Do you like it?” The girl asked in perfect English.

“You speak English?”

She nodded.

"This is my daughter, Talise."

“Talise."

“It means Beautiful Waters.” She proudly proclaimed in English.

Arrow smiled, as if he sensed her surprise.

“If they are to survive the White Man, they must be fluent in his speech.”

Mercy nodded, slowly taking another bite of hominy as her stomach growled with hunger.

“Hello, Talise. I’m Mercy Whitstone. How old are you?”

“Seven.” She held up the proper number of fingers.

“This is Tarlo.” Arrow gently pushed a reluctant toddler toward her.

“His name means Bearcub,” Talise piped up.

“Does not!”

“Does too.”

“It means Bear.” His eyes were wide as he explained to Mercy.

“It’s nice to meet you, Bear. You have a strong name. One to be very proud of.”

Bear chewed his fingers thoughtfully.

“Mercy is a funny name,” Talise said.

“It’s the name my mother gave me.”

“Who is your mother?”

“She’s no longer living,” Mercy blurted, then thought perhaps she should not talk about death to someone so young. “She is at peace in heaven now.”

“Our mother is gone too.” Talise looked down. “We don’t know where she went.”

“What do you mean?”

“She left us.”

Their mother hadn’t died? Mercy did not know how to respond. The look on Talise’s face was wrought with grief. No child deserved to be abandoned, to be left to question what they did to make their mother leave. Mercy immediately wanted to go to her, gather her up in her arms and take away her pain. She recalled the hurt in Arrow’s expression when he told her he was alone when they were in the forest.

The little boy wore an equally sad expression. Not just sad…lost.

What woman in her right mind would walk out on her children? They weren’t objects to grow tired of. They were living souls you carried inside yourself for nine months; lifelong commitments to love and teach and watch grow into hardworking, caring adults to hopefully become a pillar to society. Mercy recalled the pain of losing her daughter. Evan, as she would have named her had she lived. For weeks Mercy had sat around in a grief-stricken fog, wanting to die, no care or thought how she would go on. Children shouldn’t have to wonder why their mother had abandoned them.

“Are you our new mother?” Talise's expression was strangely hopeful.

Arrow put his hand on Talise’s back, said something to her in their native language. Talise frowned, looked down at her hands then obediently went outside, taking her brother with her.

“Coaching them already?” Mercy touched her forehead, feeling another wave of dizziness.

“What does that mean?”

“You promised your children a mother. Why did she leave?”

“I don’t know.” Arrow sighed. “We fought often. She wanted other things.”

“What did you fight about?”

“She did not like that I was gone often. She wanted me home so she did not have to do most of the work raising them. She did not want anything to do with them.”

“Did she hold them?” Mercy felt tears well at the backs of her eyes. She remembered how she had held Evan’s deceased little body. How Trevor had to pull Evan out of her arms to bury her. Evan had looked like she was sleeping. A perfect little sleeping angel. Mercy had wrapped her up in her best quilt, one her grandmother had made. Trevor had fashioned a little pine box from the same wood that he had made the cradle that she never got the chance to sleep in.

“We had to get others to wet nurse them. Their mother refused. She said she was not like the white man’s cow.” Arrow’s words were filled with disdain. “She left months after Tarlo was born. We have not seen her since.”

“Do you think she is still living?” Mercy pictured the woman alone and falling victim to the elements. A fate any less would clearly be deserving for abandoning her children.

“Some have said they saw her at other Gageagaono villages. She was seen with another man at last winter’s White Dog Ceremony.”

Mercy had no idea what that was, but she didn’t really care. Her head was still reeling over the fact that she had left her children. Leaving Arrow was one thing, but a mother simply did not abandon her children. That was a one way trip to hell as far as she was concerned--and deservingly so.

“Do you like them?” Arrow’s tone was soft, vulnerable in a way she had never witnessed.

“Of course--how could you even ask me that?” Mercy could not believe his audacity. Children were not puppies to decide if they wanted to be kept or not.

Arrow had tears in his eyes and he frantically wiped them away. Something broke in her heart. This man infuriated her, drove her crazy with both lust and misunderstanding, kidnapped her--even drugged her.

Yet she felt for him. Something in her wanted to take him in her arms and tell her that everything would be all right. Of course she couldn’t do that. She would not lead time on, making him think she was going to stay because she couldn’t. She had a life back home. Exactly what sort of life she would be going back to she did not know. If she had to start over some way completely different from what she was used to she would. She had done so before and she would do it again if need be.

“I wanted you to like them.”

“Who wouldn’t like them?”

“My former wife.”

“I am not your former wife. I lost a child. I know what that kind of pain feels like.”

“Then why would you not want to make them yours?”

Mercy didn’t understand how Arrow could think she could just accept this new life at the drop of a hat. Guilt hit her hard and fast. The longer she stayed here the more she would hurt the three of them when she left.

Her thoughts shocked her. Arrow had kidnapped her, tied her up like an animal, even drugged her and here she was worried about hurting his feelings.

It was easier to stay mad.

She squared her shoulders, raised her chin and met his gaze. “I cannot stay here, and you know that. You kidnapped me. You drugged me. That was wrong.”

“You would not have come otherwise, and the drug was not harmful. I made sure of that.”

“I don’t care. You don’t do that to people.” She really was angry now, and it felt better than feeling sorry for him.

Arrow sighed. “I am sorry. This man will make things up to you. This is my promise to you.”

He reached for her hand and held it. Strong fingers circled her hand. They were calloused but warm, made her feel secure. Safe.

“I don’t want your promises. I don’t trust you.”

“I will make you trust me somehow.”

Mercy highly doubted that was possible but she said nothing. She was tired of fighting, tired of feeling bad, tired of being scared. She just wanted to rest. She just wanted peace.

“I need to ask you something.”

Immediately, Mercy felt her guard go up again. She pulled her hand from his. “What?”

I need you to watch my children while I go to council. It is many days walk from here. I will be gone for many nights, possibly the rest of summer.”

Mercy couldn’t believe his audacity. Kidnaping her to a village of strangers who would likely rather kill her as to look at her, then taking off for God knows when. “No deal. I’ll run away before then."

“Do not force me to make you my prisoner.”

Mercy struggled to keep her anger in check. “How do you keep me prisoner when you’re not here?”

“I will have my family to watch you.”

“They will imprison me as I watch your children.” She shook her head in disbelief. “Do you know how senseless that sounds? Why don’t you get your family to watch them?"

“They want to take them away from me. If you are here, I will be able to keep them.”