Page 63 of His Flawed Ride

There is no grief smacking him in the face. There is no loss of breath at the news. The fucker smirks and asks, “You’ve seen her? She’s actually dead and it’s not a scam?”

“No, Cas. I was the one who found her.”

“Yeah, I heard you’ve been tapping her. Well, not anymore, unless you’re into that shit.”

Fucking hell. I don’t know what to say to that.

“Lily’s gone, and I reckon Harper’s gonna need ya.”

I step away and turn to leave when he says, “Don’t waste your time mourning her, she would’ve dropped you when a new sucker came along.”

I don’t have the energy to explain we weren’t anything more than a few fucks, but I do have a heart, and I don’t relish in a woman ending her own life.

“At least we don’t have to put up with her anymore,” are Cas’s final words before he steps into his house and shuts the door.

His coldness sends a shudder down my spine. I wonder what’s happened in Cas’s life to make him be so cruel.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Lily

Dear Harper, my beautiful daughter,

You’ve said that you don’t want any more apologies from me, but I can’t seem to stop myself. A hundred years of apologising still wouldn’t be enough for the years of uncertainty and upheaval you went through because of me. Out of everyone, it’s you that knows me the most. You’ve seen all my ugly, and even now, you’ve still welcomed me into your home so I can heal from yet another bad choice I made. I used to believe I could change. That one day I’d turn my life around and I’d find the happiness I’ve been chasing since I was girl. Change always seemed possible, but it was always unachievable. Please don’t see this as anything you’ve done or said or didn’t say. For the first time, I am in full control of my own life.

I seek peace, and not just for a few days before I mess up again. I want it to last. I don’t know what waits for me now, but I believe that it’s going to be better than this.

I’m tired of everything. I want you to go on having the best life, giving your son everything I never gave you. I love youso much and have only wanted the best for you. I now realise I was never the one who could give you that. I should have told you who your father was years before I did. I should have stayed in town and raised you with him. It pains me to say but Cas has been a good father to his boys, you should have had the experience of a father like they did. Too many should haves to write but I should have done them all. Live your life for yourself. You have the perfect family you’ve created regardless of me not having shown what that was like. Cherish it, Harper, and never let it go. Tell Slade I could never repay him for being an amazing brother in life, he has done so much more than a brother should and I love him so much.

Goodbye.

I love you.

Mom.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Leo

News of Lily’s suicide has spread around the club and Harper’s worrying me. She hasn’t said a word, only clutching what I’ve been told is Lily’s note to her. Lily’s body was taken away an hour ago and Harper hasn’t moved from the swing seat on the front porch since.

Dad sits beside her just as quiet and every now and then, she grasps onto his hand, squeezes it, and then places her hand back onto her lap.

I light a cigarette, not wanting to be here but not wanting to leave her. I give her the silent support she needs at the moment.

Until she says, “I don’t blame or hate her for doing this.” Her voice barely above a whisper. “I was so short with her, even after she came back beaten.”

“This is not your fault, darlin’,” Dad tells her.

If she were to look in his eyes, she’d see anger that Lily has done this and left Harper, though not in floods of tears, but still in obvious pain.

“Deep down I know that. She wasn’t my responsibility, and she could always manage to find herself in some sort of trouble, but she was lonely and when you’re not in a good place, you don’t make good choices.”

“I could argue with you, but you’ve lost your mom and I’m not gonna add to your grief.”

She offers dad a small, sad smile and the still, quiet air is disturbed by a motorcycle riding around the corner of the clubhouse.

Luca.