Page 16 of Highlander’s Wild Lass (Wild McLeans #1)

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A nthony didn’t sleep the rest of the night, he laid in his bed—their bed now, he supposed—unable to sleep. Unable to sleep with Celestia sleeping beside him, cheek pressed against his chest.

He had his arm over her back, and she had her arm draped over his torso, puzzled together under the sheets. She fit perfectly beside him, and he never wanted to spend a night without her by his side.

Something happened last night. There was lust, there was passion, there was...love—and damnit! He hadn’t thought that it would happen so fast. Especially to him.

Especially with her.

Her skin was so soft underneath the coarseness of his palm, and her breath was hot against his skin. A jolt of pain slithered its way through his chest, and he did not want to admit what he was feeling—he did not want to feel this way.

He promised her that this marriage was only to help one another out of their own tough situations, and now...now there was something else there for him.

Anthony thought it could possibly be love; he remembered the way his mother and father would describe it to him, how it felt falling in love, how it felt to love someone.

But was it truly love?

This fast?

Nay, surely not .

Yet there, again, was the pain in his chest.

Anthony slowly peeled himself from underneath Celestia and threw on his shirt. He turned to see if she’d woken up, but she—thankfully—hadn’t moved.

The sky was still dark, but Anthony could see the faint glow of the coming day. He needed to get some distance from this, from her, and see if these feelings lingered on into the rest of his day.

He quickly dressed, scribbled a quick note for her and placed it on the pillow, and left. He needed to get to work anyway and there was no better time than now.

Anthony built a fire in his office, lit a dozen candles around the room, and sat at his desk. First, he needed to secure tutors for Celestia’s brothers and sister. He needed the best ones he could find. Then, as he promised Celestia, he would write to her father’s customers reassuring them that his wife was more than capable of running the distillery.

He wrote letter after letter until he heard the rooster crow and the castle come alive beneath him. He sealed each envelope with a wax seal, a monotonous task that helped him keep his mind from her.

And yet, he could not.

Flashes of last night came to him. She on her back, looking up at him with heavy eyes, running her hands down his back. The feel of himself inside her. How she tightened around him...

“Anthony?” Celestia called from behind his study door.

“Come in,” he called.

The door opened slowly on its hinges and in stepped Celestia through a crack, dressed only in her shift.

God...

He knew he was staring, but he couldn’t help himself. The morning light was streaming through the window and causing the outline of her body to glow from underneath.

The arousal was there, within him, outside of him.

“Mornin’,” he said lamely, glancing away to pour the wax onto an envelope. He poured it slowly, hoping that if he didn’t look, she would disappear, as would his excitement.

She clasped her hands in front of her, sounding uncertain as she spoke, “Do ye have another plaid for me to wear? I need go to my room.”

His eyes flew to her. “Yer room?”

“Aye, I need to get dressed and I am nae puttin’ my weddin’ gown on to simply walk to my room.”

He closed his eyes for a moment. Right, her clothes were still in her old room. “Of course, there should be a plaid in the top drawer of the dresser.”

“O-oh,” Celestia stammered, turning to leave.

He sighed. “Wait...”

She turned toward him again.

“Do ye feel alright? After last night...”

Celestia shrugged, a small smile alighting her features. “A bit tired, a bit sore. But alright.”

She closed the door behind her, and Anthony fell back in his chair, dragging his hands up and down his face. He knew he could love her, despite how stubborn and difficult she could be, no matter how frustrating she was to him. This marriage could be a love match after all, if he wasn’t terrified that she didn’t love him.

But he would be damned if he didn’t make good on his promise and care for her and protect her for the rest of their lives together.

* * *

Celestia had easily found a plaid, wrapped it around her, making her way to her bedroom. The family quarters were quiet, and all the bedroom doors were shut; she knew that her brothers and sister would not be awake for hours after last night.

She wasn’t even sure how she’d woken up so early. Maybe because she felt a colossal space where she expected Anthony to be. Celestia never learned what happened after the wedding night, no one ever spoke of it.

Celestia half-expected Dara to be waiting for her, but the room was empty when she pushed open the door. She quickly changed, her thoughts going back to last night. How his hands trailed up the length of her body, getting to know every inch of her. How she explored him with an urgency she’d never felt in herself before. How it had hurt for a moment but the feeling of him filling her up felt better than anything she felt in her life.

She expected to feel differently, body and soul, afterward. Last night she felt as if her heart would burst with how he made her feel, how intimate they had been. His hesitancy this morning shocked her a bit, but maybe this was just how he was after being with someone.

Even if she was his wife.

She thought it best to busy herself with a task and found herself in the kitchens. Maids were bustling about and Mrs. Duncan was at the center of it.

“Good mornin’, m’lady!” Mrs. Duncan called.

Celestia moved to her. “Oh, please, Mrs. Duncan,” she said, laying a hand on the older woman’s forearm. “Ye’ve ken me since I was a wee thing, please just call me Celestia.”

Mrs. Duncan grinned wide. “Aye, of course, Celestia,” she said, brushing her hands on her apron. “I’ve taken tea and breakfast to yer Da, and if ye want to take breakfast with him, I can fix ye a tray.”

“Aye, in a bit,” she said, looking around the kitchen. “I was wonderin’ if ye needed any help cleanin’ or cookin’ this mornin’?”

Mrs. Duncan was rendered speechless. “Y-ye want to help? Help m-me and the maids in the kitchen?”

Celestia nodded. “I need somethin’ to keep me busy and I always enjoyed cookin’...” She saw the look on Mrs. Duncan’s face. “Perhaps nae, then? I dinnae mean to overstep or—”

“Nay, nay, nay, Celestia. Ye just took me by surprise, dearie.” Mrs. Duncan snapped her fingers and a maid stood at attention at her side. “Get the lady an apron, will ye please, Faye?”

The maid’s eyes shot to Celestia in wonder and shock, but she said nothing and disappeared into the rooms just beyond the kitchen, quickly returning and handing the apron to Celestia.

“We’re gettin’ breakfast ready. So, if ye’d be kind enough to cut the onions. I’ll be mixin’ them into the egg dish I’m makin’.”

Celestia grabbed a knife and settled at the center table with a pile of onions to cut. She could have given a thousand excuses as to why she found herself here of all places, but Mrs. Duncan offered an old childhood comfort that she desperately needed at the moment.

* * *

Anthony had finished his work for the day, way too early for his liking. He was sitting in his study, avoiding Celestia with Sebastian standing before him, arms crossed and looking exhausted.

“Did ye have a good night?” Sebastian asked.

He only nodded. “Did ye?”

Sebastian smirked. “I always do. Where is yer new wife? She isnae in yer bedchambers.”

Anthony arched a brow. “Ye went into my room?”

“Nay, the door is wide open. I simply just peered in as I passed.”

Anthony shrugged. “I dinnae ken.”

“Ye daenae ken where yer wife is? I figured ye would still be in bed with her—marital bliss and all that, ye ken.”

Anthony closed his eyes. “It was blissful.”

“Then why are ye in here and Celestia is nowhere to be seen?”

He shook his head, steepling his fingers together and tapping them against his mouth. “She must be somewhere.”

“I’m sure she’s somewhere, but... ye almost seem distressed.”

Anthony stood up. “I am nae distressed.”

Sebastian lowered his voice to a near whisper and crept closer to Anthony’s desk as he said, “Was it nay good last night? Are ye not...compatible.”

“Nay, Bas! Good lord, nay!”

“Then what the hell is goin’ on?”

Anthony paced. “I truly dinnae ken. One minute I can’t stand her, even up to the moment before she agreed to the marriage. But now, after last night—maybe...even before—I think I care for the lass.”

Sebastian made a face. “Obviously, ye care for the lass. Ye wouldnae have put on a big show of askin’ her to wed ye if ye dinnae.”

“But she is...so...”

“Beautiful? Headstrong? Maternal?”

Anthony shot a sideways glance at Sebastian. “Of course, she is all those things.”

“Then what is it?”

Anthony collapsed into the armchair before the fireplace. “I think...well, I think I might—”

The grin slowly crept onto Sebastian’s face, building and building until it completely took over and Anthony had a full view of his teeth. “My God, ye love her.”

“Nay!” Anthony stood abruptly, casting a glare at Sebastian. “I dinnae. I dinnae love her.”

Sebastian held his hands up in forfeit. “Fine, ye dinnae love her. Shall we go for a ride before yer uncles wake up and entrap us in some sort of ridiculous sword fight.”

“Aye, but I’m sure they will find us nay matter our efforts to avoid them.”

* * *

When it was time for bed, Celestia was hesitant to return to their chambers. Hesitant because she thought maybe what happened last night might happen again, despite how badly she wanted it to.

She spent most of the day with Mrs. Duncan in the kitchen and in the gardens. It felt good to harvest the food she would be eating at each meal, helping the people who now served her and her family.

Anthony hadn’t come to look for her once.

She had spent some time with Auralia and her father exploring the two-story library, while the twins had taken off to ride their horses citing that they wanted to get familiar with their new home.

Still, she had not seen Anthony. Not even at the midday meal or supper. Though she had spotted him in the field from the hall windows with Sebastian fending off his uncles in what appeared to be a friendly duel. When she walked into their bedroom, she found him undressing for the night.

“Who won?”

“Hmm?” he said, looking a bit startled as she came in. As if he had forgotten she was here. But she supposed this was how they agreed to live—separately.

“I assume yer uncles?” she said, beginning to undress. Her pulse settled when she realized it didn’t seem like he was in any state to be intimate.

“Oh, that, ye saw that?” He watched her nod. “My uncles were winnin’ at first, slammin’ the butts of their swords into our arms and stomach, but Bas and I got them in the end.”

“Very good,” she said, pulling the pin from her bun and letting her hair fall down her back.

“Where were ye all day?”

She removed her bodice and let her single skirt fall to the ground. She was in her shift finally, and the ache in her limbs from gardening and climbing every ladder in the library had exhausted her.

He was folding his kilt neatly and placing it on top of the dresser while Celestia flattened her skirt and draped it haphazardly over the back of a chair.

“Well?” he prodded.

“I was with Mrs. Duncan for most of the day. Helpin’ in the gardens and the kitchens.”

Anthony blinked as if he heard her wrong. “Helpin’...”

“Then,” she continued, feeling like Anthony was about to object to her working alongside the servants. “My sister wanted to get familiar with the library, so Da and I accompanied her—ye ken, they both love to read. I appreciate ye lettin’ them use it.”

They climbed into bed, Celestia laying stiff on the pillow. Anthony prodded and fluffed the down feather pillow before he settled into the sheets. He clasped his hands on his stomach, peering up at the ceiling.

“Are we—” she said, her voice just a breath, turning her head to look at him. “Are we goin’ to do what we did last night...again?” She felt foolish for even asking it.

His smile was quick to appear and even quicker to vanish. “Nay, nae tonight, lass. A married couple doesnae have to do it every night.”

Celestia nodded her head, somewhat relieved, somewhat disappointed. She closed her eyes, hoping she would fall asleep easily, but she felt Anthony’s eyes on her. She slid one eye open. “What are ye lookin’ at?”

“Ye.”

“Why?”

“Did ye really spend the day with Mrs. Duncan and helpin’ the servants?”

Both eyes were open now. “I did. I wanted to get to ken the people who work for...us.” She found it difficult to verbalize that she and Anthony were one now, that her family was his family too. “Do ye think I shouldnae have done that?”

Anthony shook his head. “It is odd, I daenae remember much of my maither doin’ things like that, and Eleanor would never be caught in the servant quarters.”

Celestia let out a laugh. “That doesnae surprise me about, Eleanor. But I remember my maither tellin’ me about how they would always help about the castle.”

Anthony turned then, wrapping his arms around her waist, and pulling her to him. She found herself relaxing into the warmth of his body and loving the heaviness of his arm around her waist.

“Eleanor is a spoiled thing, but I’m sure ye ken that from growin’ up with her.”

“I do,” she said, hoping it didn’t come off as too insulting to his sister.

The desire pooled in her belly every time she felt Anthony’s breath. The closeness was too much, but she dare not pull away from him. She needed a distraction, something to keep her attention until the feeling passed.

“I think I’m goin’ to ride to Inverness tomorrow,” she said. “I’ve been gone far too long.”

“Ye’re goin’ to ride by yerself to Inverness?” he said, squeezing her closer to him. “The roads are nae safe for a woman.”

“I would never. I bumped into Da’s apprentice this mornin’—he must have passed out in the hall because he was in the same clothes he wore to the kirk. I told him to meet me in the courtyard at sunrise.”

“Were ye goin’ to ask me?”

She stiffened in his arms. “For permission? Or to go with me?”

He exhaled. “For permission.”

Celestia turned to face him, the usual annoyance she felt for Anthony returned. She enjoyed this feeling so much more than what had remained in her heart after their first night together. “Anthony, ye told me we would lead our own lives in this marriage. Ye told me I could do whatever I wished.”

Anthony nodded, placing a heavy hand on her cheek. “Aye, aye, aye, yer right. I did tell ye that.”

She placed a hand on his chest, unsure if she just wanted to touch him or was getting ready to push him away. “Are ye a man of yer word?”

He brushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “I am a man of my word. Go to Inverness, I’ll see that ye have everythin’ ye need before ye leave.”

She patted his chest with the palm of her hand. “Good.” She tucked her arms closer to her own body and scooted closer to him, wanting to be surrounded by his warmth. The very scent of him made her eyes heavy.