Page 24 of Hero & Villain (Super Serum Billionaires #1)

“Yes, you also had right away. The other car was driving recklessly.”

“Oh. So I should also drive recklessly?”

“No, you should drive defensively. Pull into the next driveway on your right.”

I turned and found myself pulling into a restaurant, using the term loosely. Young girls on roller blades were bringing out trays to cars parked around a little island with fake grass and a few bushes. “What is this?”

“Lunch. You’re buying. You owe me for teaching you how to drive.”

I frowned at him. “I guess I’m glad you’re cheap.”

“You can’t afford much. Jezebel went through your clothes and told me your net worth.” He whistled and shook his head.

“I’m going to shoot you.” I took the hair band out of my pocket and shot the elastic at him, hitting him on his taped nose.

He caught the elastic and stared at it before looking at me.

“Just for that, I’m going to order twice as much.

You did say you wanted to fatten me up.” He pulled out his cell phone.

“I’m in parking space eight. I’d like your turtle burger with a gravel malt and two servings of curly fries, plus a blooming onion and fried mushrooms and a side salad.

Hold on.” He put his phone to his chest. “What do you want?”

I shrugged. “Make that two.”

He grinned and said, “Double that order. We’ll wait.” He put his phone away and put his arms behind his head and closed his eyes.

“Give me back my hair thing.”

“Is that the technical term? Sh. I’m tired.”

“Don’t sleep around me. That’s a sign of disrespect.”

“It’s not disrespect, it’s exhaustion. I had a very long night.”

“That’s the ninja gig, or didn’t anyone ever warn you about job hazards? Poor Jerk Badger.” I patted his head.

He snapped his teeth at me, but didn’t open his eyes.

With nothing to do, I closed my eyes and sank down into the seat. Mm. There wasn’t anything wrong with the cushioning cream leather. I didn’t expect to sleep, but after that night I couldn’t help drifting off. I woke up with a start to find a perky blond smiling at Dirk like he was an appetizer.

“Thank you,” I said, holding out my hands for the tray, but she kept smiling at him.

He opened his eyes and gave her a lazy smile. “Hey, Tansy. I must have drifted off.”

“Death-Hammer shouldn’t work you guys so hard, but it is why you win so much,” she said with a giggle that made me literally nauseated.

“Hey, Tansy, I’m paying, so if you could look at me long enough to take my money, I’d appreciate it.

Yes, you have to stop staring at Dagger like he’s pizza.

He’s not pizza. I’ve tasted him and he’s much closer to chocolate.

Am I supposed to shove the money down your bra and pat your butt, or is that a stigma? ”

She blinked at me until I finally had her full attention.

I smiled and leaned closer to her while I took the tray. “I’m a female in a car with a male. That means you address me, or you don’t get a tip.” I dumped all the bags on Dirk’s lap and shoved the tray with a wad of cash back at the girl. “Now run along, sweetheart.”

She took the tray and glanced at Dirk with an open mouth, but he was looking at me with a funny expression, closer to amusement than shock and horror. She marched off full of indignation.

“The next time you come here, someone will spit in your food,” he said, handing me a wrapped turtle burger, whatever that was.

“She definitely has spit designs.” I took a big bite of the actually incredibly delicious burger.

“Doesn’t it bother you when girls objectify you?

” I asked before taking another big bite.

Was it okay for me to eat such high fat carb food?

Would he mind if I put on some weight? I could eat around him and then be neurotic about food when I was alone.

I was so tired of being neurotic about food.

If he wanted to be my big brother, I could eat whatever I wanted.

He scratched his head and peeled the wrapper back. “Is that what she was doing? What’s the difference between a girl being friendly and objectifying me? Just for future reference.”

“Whether she’s pretty. It’s the same thing, really, and the same with men. A rich, handsome man can get away with all sorts of behavior that a poor ugly man would be arrested for.” I took another vicious bite.

“So many injustices in life. I’m handsome and wealthy, ergo, I can get away with all sorts of things. What do you let me get away with, Princess Pink?”

“I’m not motivated by looks or money. It’s one of my quirks. I’m actually less likely to find a pulchritudinous male attractive. That’s a lie. It makes absolutely no difference. Money, though, I definitely despise men with money much more than poor musicians.”

He laughed and stuck a gooey deep-fried vegetable in my mouth. It was incredibly good, so I took another one, dipping it in the sauce without his permission.

“Your ex wasn’t rich?” he asked.

“Of course he was rich. I shouldn’t have overlooked it, but we all make mistakes.”

“If he was poor it wouldn’t have ended badly?”

“It would have been much different. He was okay. He’d make me laugh sometimes. He took me to the symphony the opening night of anything new. I liked his mother.”

“Huh. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a woman say that they liked their significant other’s mother.”

“Well, he was a pervert, so she hoped I’d fix him. I think that’s why she was so nice to me.”

“Did you fix him?”

“I should have.” I made a snipping motion and then took a bite out of his sandwich.

Not that mine wasn’t fine, but his looked better.

Why was I talking so much to him? Maybe I was just trying to put down his guard by pretending to believe that he wanted me to be his little sister, or maybe I was tired of pretending and just wanted to exist as myself for a little while, whoever that was.

“Hey, Pinkie, you don’t steal other people’s food. That’s foul criminal behavior.”

“I paid for it. I even tipped. Twice really, because I gave Tansy excellent advice about dealing with couple customers.”

He leaned over and took a big bite out of my sandwich at least three times larger than my bite had been. “Mm.” He chewed noisily and then licked his lips. “Yours is better.”

“You’re disgusting. Trade.”

“No, it’s only better if you’re holding it. It’s a law in Physics. I had a whole class on it at Harvard. Harold Bingham the Fifteenth made an excellent point about it.”

I hesitated then took another bite out of his. It really did taste better when he was holding it. “Who can argue with science?” I asked after swallowing the huge bite that I’d barely been able to chew.

“Anyone can argue with anything.”

“That’s you. You argue about everything, don’t you? Someone told you not to be a ninja, and it started this whole debacle that ended in the desert with a migraine.”

“You’re really proud of that whole thing, aren’t you? Some people would be ashamed. I didn’t have a migraine. I was just fine. Not even a trace of dizziness.”

“How could I not be proud of that? Do you know how many people can perfectly render someone unconscious without any lasting side-effects?”

“You’ve clearly had a lot of practice.”

“Yes. My cousin…” I blinked and started eating as quickly as I could, because having my mouth occupied was apparently the only thing that could shut me up. I’d talked to him way too much. I mean, I’d talked about Clint’s mother. Who does that? No one.

“Tell me about your most recent fling’s mother,” I said, frowning at him.

He raised a dark brow. “I don’t think you mean fling. I don’t know the mothers of my flings. That would be awkward.”

“Oh. Right.”

“The last serious girlfriend I had was a very nice girl I met at Harvard. Harold made a play for her, but I let her steal my sandwich and the rest was history. Literally, because it ended over five years ago. Her mother was friends with my mother. They probably still think we’re going to get married. ”

“Did you like her mother? I mean, if she’s like your mother, does she feel like family, like another aunt or a second mother?”

“No. Austere is a good word for her. She would accept pristine roses and a chaste kiss in the air next to her cheek. I was allowed to ask about her dog and her husband’s health.”

I laughed and curled up on the seat, getting more comfortable. “What kind of dog did she have?”

“A pug named Harold Bingham the Fifteenth, or something equally preposterous. What’s your mother like?”

I wiped my hands on the napkin and buckled up. “I’ve taken enough of your time.”

“Your mother isn’t your favorite person?”

“She might be if she wasn’t dead.”

“Ah. My bad.” He squeezed my shoulder. “That number I gave you…”

I turned and bit him, not quite hard enough to draw blood. He pulled his hand back and frowned at me. “You gave it to me. I took it. I’m already regretting it. I know that I seem like a mess that can’t manage her own business, but you caught me at a low.”

“You mean if you were doing better you wouldn’t make me bleed so much?”

I frowned and pulled out into the road. “There isn’t any blood. You can’t just touch me whenever you want.”

“Why not? You kiss me right when I’m getting furious until I forget what I’m angry about. Then I remember because someone snaps my recently broken nose with a hair band.”

“Sorry. I’ll try not to kiss you.”

“Try? Is it that hard not to?” His voice was soft, like his eyes would be if I looked at them. I wasn’t going to look at him, to see that dimple or the mouth that felt so right and tasted so much better than chocolate.

“It’s not that I don’t want to kiss you, but never when I actually do. I don’t go around kissing people.”

“I remember from the tower. You were as confusing back then as you are now.”

“Thanks. You too.” I sighed and focused on driving, signaling for three long seconds before changing lanes or turning. I drove around until I found my way back to the compound.

“Dirk,” I said once I pulled in front of his tech building. “Thank you for letting me stay.”

He squeezed my shoulder, but his hand felt very different from Trix’s, gentle, warm, irresistible. “You shouldn’t thank me until you get what you want.”

My heart pounded as I turned and looked at him, his lips inches from mine. “What do I want?”

He smiled, a heartbreaker smile that was all bad boy with that one dimple. “I can’t tell you that, but maybe therapy will help you figure that out even more than taking down stalker ninjas.”

“Some people would be ashamed of breaking and entering.”

“You think just anyone can break through Jezebel’s security? I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you pesky kids.”

“Was that a Scooby Doo reference? You are such a nerd. Give me directions to her house.”

“So imperious. How do you know Scooby Doo?”

“Doesn’t everyone? Go on, Prince Badger.”

“Now I have to go home and watch a marathon of Scooby Doo episodes. Do you want to come?”

A rush of confused delight went through me that I mercilessly cut down. Dirk Dagger was not asking me on a date. He was offering to be my big brother. Why did that make my chest ache? “I have things to do.”

“Right. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Unless we don’t. You’ve done your civic duty by teaching me not to commit vehicular manslaughter. You also know that if there is screaming, it’s not a thing worth bringing out your ninja suit.”

“Jezebel probably won’t give me back my night vision goggles, will she?”

“You could ask.”

He grinned. “I’ll call it her Christmas present.”

I waited for him to go, but he lingered, taking his time to gather up all the trash and a stray fry on the floor mat.

He was strikingly adorable with hands full of wrappers and a taped nose.

The impulse to kiss him was almost too strong for me to resist. Like a good villain in danger of losing her mind, the second he got out I hit the pedal and sped towards the gate, leaving a cloud of dust in the air behind me.