Page 3

I softly hummed a tune as I stood in front of my computer, waiting for it to spit out the next couple. I stared at the little bubble as it loaded, working through all the math and the information I had input.

Anger flared as I thought about how Henrik told off the guy who spoke to me the other day.

A part of me was happy that someone wanted to stand up for me, but the other part was annoyed that it was him.

He had made himself perfectly clear, so why the hell was he still hanging around me?

Why was he asking how I was doing when he didn’t want to waste time on me? It didn’t make sense.

I took a sip of my coffee and surveyed my lab.

It was clean, and everything was organized carefully.

I enjoyed it, but Sam always thought it was a little too white.

I had a few pictures of us hanging over my computer and a few that sat on my desk.

I had to hand it to her. She knew how to spruce up a place.

The little pictures added color and made it feel a little less empty.

I sighed, staring at the pictures. Sam and I went out to a restaurant. Another was when we were going hiking. There was even one at her baby shower with everyone. This was before Henrik rejected me, of course.

“Nope, enough of that,” I grumbled, looking away from the last photo. “It’s in the past. Let’s leave it there where it belongs.”

Henrik made his point. I could move on. It was just going to take longer than a few months. Besides, he was going to be married to a woman in no time, so he would be someone else's problem. Maybe then he would leave me alone.

My computer beeped, and I turned my attention to it. I read the screen. “Match found.”

I glanced at the printer as it started to print the results.

I couldn’t help but be impressed, considering this was my baby.

The algorithm behind the system was made by my own head.

It churned through everything put in and worked quickly to assemble information.

I had used it before to help the women find blood matches and quickly realized if I put in more information, it would be able to find matches for people.

The printer threw out the results, and I grabbed the paper and quickly scanned it. My eyes froze as the names were in bold letters right next to each other.

This had to be a sick joke.

My name sat next to Henriks.

I shook my head and started frantically typing into my computer, trying to get it to recompute because that couldn’t be right. There was no way I was Henrik’s perfect match. We had nothing in common. We had no similar taste, and the man disliked me. The marriage would fail.

But the computer spat out our names together once more.

I started to panic and shook my head. “No. No. This can’t be. There is no way.”

But my computer didn’t lie. It had never been wrong. That was the thing about math…you only got the right answer.

I grabbed my purse and threw the papers onto the table. I made my way out. I wasn’t sure if it was from fear of the results or just needing to walk away and clear my head. Either way, I needed to get away from everything.

I got to my car and took a few deep breaths. I pressed my forehead against my steering wheel and sighed.

“This can’t be happening.”

How?

How was it that we matched? Where did it put us together? Sure, I understood that I had a healthy body, but it also took in hobbies and activities with the equation as well. It took in everything.

I knew what was on my profile. A fat, pale lab scientist who spent all her time at home or work. She had odd hobbies, such as collecting bugs and working on math equations.

I didn’t know what was on Henrik's profile, but I was sure none of what was on mine would match with his. Henrik was built like a god, and he deserved someone who could hold her head high. I was not that person.

What if I plead my case? Told the council it was a mistake. No. They would argue that I told them there was no such thing. But this had to be! This had to be the exception.

I couldn’t tell them. They would make it happen. I wouldn’t get an option.

I could just ignore this match. I could say it was inconclusive. I could just move on to someone else. I could burn the papers and act like it never happened.

My stomach sank as I remembered that everything was uploaded to them. They would know I ran someone; if I ran another, they would expect two couples.

“Fuck!” I growled, running my hands through my hair. I was in too deep. I would have to tell them I was paired up.

God! Why had I thought I could do this? What made me think I could take on a project this big? There had to be better scientists out there.

I started my car and drove home. But my mind wouldn’t shut off. It spiraled.

You are unworthy of this entire situation. You’ll fail, Henrik, and you’ll fail everyone else here. You’ve only managed to get a few women pregnant during this entire endeavor. Someone else would have figured out a solution already.

I shook my head as I got out of my car. That couldn’t be true. I worked hard. I did good work. I was figuring things out. Slowly, but I was doing it.

But not perfect. You’ve failed. You were supposed to bring results and answers, but you haven’t. You’ve hardly done anything.

I didn’t even realize I was packing up a bag inside until I was looking around my apartment, trying to think of anything I couldn’t live without.

I was leaving.

It was the only answer that made sense. I didn’t know what would happen if I got caught, but that meant I needed to be good. I had to give fast answers.

I took a photo of me and Sam. Some clothes to last me a week and some food. I left my phone on my counter, knowing it could be tracked.

As I hurried out to my car, Dahlia, my neighbor, waved at me. “Afternoon, Katie. You staying at the lab overnight again?”

I shifted the bag on my hip and nodded my head. “Yep.”

“Seems like a large bag for an overnight.”

I nodded. “Might stay a couple. I have a lot of work.”

She nodded her head, giving me a gentle smile. She was a fragile old lady who had no real family. She lost her husband and kids years ago. She had always been sweet to me, and I was going to miss talking to her.

“Well, we will see you when you get back.” She gave me a wave as she headed inside her apartment.

I continued to walk, nearly running to my car. I threw my bag inside and started the car up. I looked at my gas, knowing I would need some, but I wasn’t stopping. I could stop once I was out of town.

I didn’t know where I was going. I didn’t even know how far I was going to drive, but I needed out. Everything was suddenly suffocating me, and it was all too much.

A doctor would call it a panic attack, but I just called it being honest. I always gave myself a reason why I never had results, but maybe it was simple. I just sucked. I wasn’t cut out to be the person running this entire project. The Council had made a mistake picking me.

I parked in front of a hotel after the sun set, and I started feeling numb. I didn’t know how long I’d been driving or how far out of town I was. But I was exhausted. My entire body ached for sleep.

I headed inside and got myself a room. The hotel smelled of chlorine and cigarettes.

As I headed to my room, the smell of alcohol and musk mixed with everything else, and I cringed.

So, I hadn’t picked a good hotel, but it was going to be fine.

I would only stay a day and leave. It was just one stop, and I wouldn’t even remember it later.

I unlocked my room and stepped inside, flicking the light on.

The light flicked on and off for a solid moment before flicking on.

The room was filled with a dim light, showing a single bed and a small desk pushed against a closed window.

The room was cold, and I shut the door, walked towards the air conditioner, and turned it off.

I looked at my watch and checked the time. It was a little past ten. I should just sleep. I headed into the bathroom and cringed as I took in a semi-decent bathroom. The tub looked gross, but the sink and toilet looked freshly cleaned.

I looked at myself in the mirror. A tired version of myself stared back, looking as I had expected.

My dark brown hair was pulled back in a bun that was half falling out.

My dark green eyes stared at me, looking lifeless.

I was pale from lack of sun, and slightly bigger because, lord knows, I didn’t have time to work out.

I dug out a baggy sweater and a pair of jeans from my closet.

I felt tears build up, knowing this was the downward spiral for me.

I would never get a good job again, at least not one in science. The council would look for me and if I wrote anything about this life on a resume, they would find me. I think that hurt more than anything. Just how fucked my life had become in a matter of moments.

Tears built up, and a few broke free. I quickly wiped them away and flicked the light off. I opened my bag, grabbed a pair of pajamas, and quickly changed into them. Afterward, I walked towards the bed and yanked the sheets up. I wanted to hide under the covers and never reappear.

The sheets at least smelt clean, so I sank into them and stared at the window. I could hear the wind howling outside. I shivered, pulling the sheets even tighter against myself.

My mind doesn’t settle, though. It keeps churning, going over every mistake I have made. It kept telling me how I’d screwed everything up. I should never have accepted the job from the Council. I was just a mediocre scientist, and my research would never amount to anything.

I curled into a tighter ball, feeling tears breaking free as my mind spiraled even more. I couldn’t make it stop. Because it was all true. I had failed.

I heard the sound of a door click, and my body tensed up. I watched as light flicked into my room and then went black again. The sound of the door shutting made my heart race as my hair stood up on my body. Someone was in my room.

I searched for anything and grabbed the lamp on the side of my bed, holding it close as I quickly turned around. I pulled the lamp up, prepared to hit whoever was in my room. I would have to run since I didn’t have my phone. I doubted the police would even help me, considering I was a runner.

Light filled the room, and my eyes widened as I took in Henrik. He looked exhausted as he stood there. His eyes narrowed on me, and his jaw ground together, but he looked relieved at the same time as he stared at me.

“What the hell are you doing, Katie?”