Page 33 of Her Blind Deception (The Dark Reflection #2)

Chapter Thirty-Three

I was reeling. Everything I thought I knew was whirling around me in a sickening hurricane, torn from foundations I’d never thought to question. A thousand times he’d looked at me, smiled at me, kissed me, held me with such fierce longing, and I’d never once seen the horror or the pity I’d seen in the faces of others.

‘Then it was all a lie,’ I whispered, a new horror dawning on me. That he’d been playing me the entire time. That he’d never wanted me to start with. That he was the kind of liar I couldn’t even fathom.

He touched my cheek. Swept his thumb over my skin. Over my scars. He didn’t grimace, didn’t hesitate. ‘I’ve told you before that I’ve never lied to you.’

‘Stop. Just stop. I need a minute to think.’ I pulled away from him, put my hands up like a barrier between us. The tenderness in his expression dissolved.

‘You can have time to think,’ he said, rising to his feet. ‘Because I have to fix what you’ve broken. We’ll talk after.’ And he was walking away like the floor hadn’t dissolved beneath him, like everything was the same as it had been a few minutes ago. He was leaving me still on my knees, shattered glass spilled around me.

He was leaving me to go and find Gwinellyn.

I jolted to my feet, scrubbing away the tears I hadn’t realised I’d spilled, and went after him, glass crunching beneath my shoes like it was nothing, like it was just grit and dust and a life I’d never really lived. And something, an instinct, a premonition, made me pause, turn, go back for that knife I’d hauled all the way into the Yawn with me and all the way out again. It was crammed into the draw of the bedside table, still in its scabbard, and I yanked it up without really thinking much about what I planned to do with it.

Then I ran.

I tore through the palace, down the endless hallways and up infinite stairwells, skidding around corners and almost crashing into a gaggle of courtiers whispering about burning priests, wrenching away from them as they gasped in horror at the sight of me, expecting at any moment to catch him and never managing it. But Lester had said she was in the tower, and surely that only meant one place. If I was wrong, if they’d taken her somewhere else, she might be killed before I could reach her.

Because surely that was what he planned to do.

I reached the path to Sentinel’s Tower and the absence of guards at the entrance was enough of a sign to send me hurtling inside. There was only one set of stairs, but how many rooms? How many doorways and corridors and cells? Where would they have taken her? My mind flashed back to the room I’d been led to once, the memory of three men kneeling on the floor. He’d had prisoners taken there before. It was worth a try .

I raced up the stairs, took a left down a corridor two stories up, found the non-descript door. The little voice of survival finally caught my attention as I paused to catch my breath, and instead of flying straight into the room, I pressed my ear up against it and listened hard. Nothing.

Slowly turning the handle, I found the door locked. Was it worth trying to pick it? It was a simple keyhole lock, with a metal latch securing it in place. I drew the dragger from its scabbard. It wasn’t ideal, but it was slender and pointed, and I had nothing else.

Carefully inserting the tip of the knife into the keyhole, I began to work the internal components, hoping to catch the latch and release it, applying gentle pressure. It had been a long time since I’d had to pick a lock, but my fingers took to it immediately, my muscles remembering. I felt the resistance, the subtle clicks as the knife met the tumblers within, and with each movement I adjusted my technique, testing the tension and carefully guiding the knife’s tip. It was a delicate dance of precision and patience.

My hands were sweating. Any moment, I expected someone to catch me. Finally, a faint metallic sound resonated through the keyhole. I kept twisting slowly, methodically, until the latch inside the lock gave way with a satisfying click.

But now I had to go through. I wasn’t really sure what I was going to do if I did. I wasn’t brave, nor was I a fighter. And I had no interest in endangering myself for anyone else. Would Draven be in there? Could I talk him out of hurting her? Swallowing, I touched my fingertips to my face. Surely not like this.

The knee-jerk assumption met reality with a clang.

I’d never been anything but this to him.

Blowing out a breath, I pushed open the door .

Immediately, I caught sight of Gwinellyn. Her eyes widened, but she said nothing. It took me a moment to realise she was gagged with a strip of fabric. She backed away from me as I crossed the room. ‘Are you hurt? Where are the guards?’ I asked, realising only when she flinched that I’d yelled the words. ‘We need to get you out of here.’

‘You poisoned me,’ she spluttered as I pulled the gag from her mouth. I grasped her arms, keeping her from backing away further.

‘Listen to me,’ I said, shaking her slightly. ‘Listen! There are people here who are going to hurt you. You have to come with me to get away.’ Thankfully, her hands weren’t shackled behind her back, only tied with rope. I quickly sliced at it.

‘How do I know you aren’t going to hurt me?’ She struggled in my grip, and it took me a moment to force myself to let go of her, fighting the instinct to drag her out with me kicking and screaming.

‘Because I’m here trying to help you now. For fall’s sake, at least let me finish cutting your bonds,’ I snapped. My hand was clenched so tightly around the knife I felt like my fingers were going to crack. I forced myself to drop it. It clattered to the ground and I held my palms out in supplication. ‘Listen, I picked the best option I could. I had the apple altered so it would only put you to sleep instead of killing you and I always meant to come back and wake you.’

‘But why—’

‘Can I explain more while we run?’ I barked. ‘I promise it’ll make sense, but we need to go.’

Her eyes widened, her gaze flickering over my shoulder .

‘I don’t know why you want to keep giving her chances to prove me wrong. She never does.’ Lester’s voice. I spun round just as he closed the door and I came face-to-face with Draven. ‘I suppose a bit of betrayal keeps a marriage exciting,’ Lester continued, folding his arms.

‘You were testing me,’ I said as realisation settled over me. Of course. He hadn’t put more than a locked door in my way from betraying him again. He wanted to see if I would.

‘And you failed.’ Draven scanned my face like he was reading tea leaves, looking for a future in muddy dregs. Almost imperceptibly, he shifted his stance.

‘I told you, I won’t let her be your sacrifice.’

I’d dropped the fucking dagger. If I bent to get it, I’d be vulnerable. But if I didn’t, I’d have no weapon. I dropped down. Draven moved. He was so fast I didn’t have time to do more than snatch the hilt of the blade and cut it through the air in a few haphazard arcs, more reflex than anything. He evaded the blade, but his gaze was sharper now as I faced him down.

‘So you’re willing to give up everything to keep her alive? Everything you’ve fought for? You want it all to end by being dragged before a court and executed for treason?’

‘Why does it matter if she lives?’ I asked, my tone cracking with desperation. ‘You’ve squashed the Sanctum under your thumb, the council is afraid of you, and the Guild has barricaded themselves in. What does it matter if someone else has a greater claim to the crown?’

‘She’s a rallying point,’ he hissed. ‘It would take just one hint that there’s someone else with a right sit on that throne and we will go down. Those afraid will find their courage, they’ll regroup, and I’ll have nothing to answer them with. I don’t have the brute force of an army. We work in subterfuge.’ His gaze travelled to Gwinellyn, and he solemnly considered her. She shrank down, as thought she was trying to make herself smaller, even less of a threat than she already was. ‘And she wouldn’t let you just continue on with your life after this. She knows you’ve been working to get her out of the way. She’s too dangerous to you to be allowed to live.’

Lester was slowly edging forward on my other side, and I struck out in his direction, slashing the blade through the air chaotically.

‘Alright, alright,’ he said, stepping back with his palms up in surrender. ‘You two sort it out between you. I’ll just stand over here.’ He retreated to the wall, leaning up against it while muttering under his breath.

In that moment of distraction, Draven moved again, and before I could dart out of the way, he had a hand on my arm, fingers closing around my wrist like a vice.

‘I’ll fucking stab you,’ I snarled.

‘You won’t hurt me.’

‘I think you’ll find I definitely will.’ With a sharp jerk, I yanked him forwards, pulling him off balance as my knee shot up, aiming for his groin, because I certainly wasn’t going to fight fair. He saw it coming and dodged my knee, but it was enough to distract him and I twisted my hand, breaking his hold. I lurched away, spinning to face him, catching sight of Gwinellyn making a run for the door, her bonds dropping to the ground behind her. Lester saw her a moment after I did. He grabbed for her a fraction too late, managing to snatch only a handful of air as she slipped out of sight.

‘She’s headed up,’ he said, sticking his head out the door.

‘Go after her,’ Draven said, his eyes never leaving me.

Lester darted out of the room, his heavy footfalls quickly ascending and then fading away. Now it was just the two of us and the crackling tension as we sized each other up.

‘Why don’t you just force me to submit?’ I demanded, trying to grasp enough rage to drive me to actually use the knife as a weapon instead of a threat. ‘I know you could do it.’

‘I promised I never would again after I took Vanaria’s name from you. I never have.’

‘I don’t believe you.’ I made a few slow moves to the right and he mirrored them perfectly. ‘You’ve made me feel things that aren’t real. I’m sure you have.’

A vicious smile tore at his mouth. ‘That would be convenient, wouldn’t it?’ He lunged forward, and I yanked the knife back in a reflex that was going to damn me. He caught my free hand, yanking it above my head, and I fell against him as he held me captive there. ‘But that’s not what this is and you know it. We’re meant for each other. You can run from it all you want. You can betray me and attack me and try to take me down, but nothing will ever change that.’

I pushed the tip of my dagger against his side. ‘Don’t make me kill you.’

‘Don’t you remember what I told you, my dear?’ he said, leaning closer. ‘You have to want it.’

I gritted my teeth. I could stab him. Should stab him. But my hand wouldn’t press that blade any harder. With a yell of frustration, I swung the knife up and smashed the hilt into his wrist, twisting as I did, taking advantage of the moment of pain to break his hold and shoot free. In a moment, I was chasing up the stairs after Gwinellyn .

I tore up the staircase, past the door to the cells where I’d slit a man’s throat, higher and higher until my legs were burning and breathing was a wrestling match, and footsteps below chased me the entire way. A spill of light down a corridor caught my attention. An open door. I surged through it and found myself outside. Pale light filtered through angry grey clouds above and a cold wind battered at me. There was nothing up here, just a square of stone ringed with a waist-height parapet, a balcony for stationing guards. Lester was pressed up against the wall like he was trying to make himself as small as possible. And it quickly became clear why.

Above, something was swooping through the sky, dipping close enough to hear the beating of wings. I ducked down as it dove, even though it pulled up well above us and circled upwards again. It looked like one of those lizard creatures I’d seen in the Yawn. Gwinellyn was leaning over the parapet as though she was judging the distance to the ground, then looking up at the creature, her dark hair whipping around her in the wind.

‘I wouldn’t go out there if I were you,’ Lester said. ‘That thing’s taken a liking to her. It tries to chomp me every time I get close.’

Was that what Gwinellyn had arrived on? Had she really flown here on that? Surely, she didn’t have that kind of pluck.

‘Gwin!’ I called. Her gaze flashed to mine for a moment, then she steadied a foot on the parapet like she was planning on climbing onto it, withdrawing it a moment later as her nerve failed her.

‘The wyvern’s drawn an audience. Go downstairs and deal with them.’ At the sound of Draven’s voice behind me, I turned.

‘Are you sure?’ Lester hesitated.

‘’When you’ve moved them on, come back.’

I brandished the dagger as Lester disappeared back through the door, placing myself between Gwinellyn and the man I’d brought into her life. Like a curtain. Like a shield. As though it made a lick of difference.

‘Back off,’ I said. ‘Between me and the lizard, you’re not going to touch her.’

‘I don’t need to touch her.’

I caught a whiff of that bitter, smoky smell, of magic , on the wind, and froze, waiting for it to grip me, for my thoughts to turn slow and sludgy. They didn’t. But a quick glance behind me showed me that Gwinellyn was trying to climb onto the parapet again, her movements deliberate and smooth, her expression now strangely blank. Dread climbed up my oesophagus.

Draven grabbed my hand, jerking my attention back to him. ‘Did Baba Yaga tell you why I came to find you in the Winking Nymph that night?’

‘ What ?’ The strangeness of the question split my concentration. If it was a distraction, it was a good one.

‘Remember when I told you about talents with magic? The witch reads fate, glimpses the future. I didn’t pick you at random, Rhiandra. I knew you’d want revenge for what was done to you. The Guild paid and protected those vermin who scarred you, and together we can bring them down, bring the whole kingdom down. But this will be the sacrifice.’

I just stared at him, stunned by his urgency, feeling as though I was seeing him for the first time as his words swept through me like gale force winds. ‘But you were at the Winking Nymph before I was attacked,’ I said slowly. ‘You’d already picked me then.’ The memory was blurry and bleary-eyed as it surfaced from what felt like an entirely different life. Draven sitting with his arms slung over the back of the bench seat, smirking at me as I approached just after my clash with the men who would change me forever.

A string of words rang through my memory.

It won’t be the last you’ll see of him.

Unmistakable. Remembered with perfect clarity. They punched a hole through my stomach.

‘You knew.’ The realisation shook my bones, trampled my lungs. ‘You knew what they were about to do to me. You didn’t warn me.’

I wanted to be wrong. Desperately. I wanted him to deny it, to tell me of course he hadn’t known what was going to happen, that he would never have let me go through that if he could have stopped it.

But he didn’t say a word.

‘You saw me that night, knowing what they were going to do, and you just let it happen. You let them burn me.’ My mind raced down the line of my thoughts, making connections, each one rocking me, crushing me. ‘No, it’s worse than that. I never would have agreed to your deal without the scars. You needed them to burn me.’

‘I had nothing to do with them,’ he said quickly, as though that was the line he wouldn’t cross. ‘It was your fate already. I swear I wasn’t involved.’

‘But you stood by and let it happen! You could have stopped them, or you could have told me not to go out that night. But you needed me for your plan, so you let it happen without doing anything.’

He squeezed my hand tighter, pain written all over his face. But not enough pain. Not like the pain I’d felt that night. Not like the pain I’d felt every day since when I had to look into that mirror and see what they did to me.

‘I didn’t know what you’d mean to me then,’ he said, the words raw, tender.

I angled the blade, tightened my grip.

‘I was just another sacrifice,’ I spat.

His pewter eyes didn’t flinch away from mine. There was something there in their depths that I hadn’t seen there before.

Fear.

But he didn’t release my hand.

‘I’m going to protect you now like I should have then,’ he murmured. Then his gaze moved past me. ‘Jump,’ he said, the word ringing with authority.

I moved without thinking.

Or maybe I did think.

I surged forwards and there was hardly any resistance. The blade was sharp.

He folded, his mouth falling open in a groan of pain that made something in me throb with agony. He finally released me as his hands went to his stomach, and he looked down, seeming surprised to find a knife buried in him. Red blood began to bloom around the hilt, leeching into his shirt, drawing it in to cling close to his skin, and I released the hilt of the blade with a startled inhale, stumbled backwards. He staggered, his hand shooting out to the wall for support. I couldn’t breathe.

A shriek from the winged lizard above me snapped my attention back to that parapet. Gwin was standing up, her arms spread out either side. I vaulted towards her, grabbing a hold of her dress just as she stepped off the ledge. She seemed to fall in slow motion, her skirt billowing out around her as I scrambled to hold on to her, feeling the moment I lost her in a tearing of fabric and a sudden loosing of the weight at my hands. The monster in the sky dove after her. Her fall was broken as she collided with a protruding beam two floors down, folding in half around it and then slipping off.

It was just the pause the monster needed to catch her. Before she could free fall again, it had her in its grip, talons clutched around her bodice. It beat its wings, struggling to keep a grip on her, before it swooped down towards the ground, gently depositing her on the grass, where she collapsed.

‘Fuck!’

I turned at the expletive to catch sight of Lester kneeling by Draven, who was leaned against a wall, his breathing shallow, his eyes closed.

‘She fucking stabbed you!’ Lester gently touched the edge of the wound, and Draven hissed, wincing.

I had to get out of there. I had to get away from the sight of the knife hilt, from the way his shirt slicked to his skin with blood. I edged behind Lester, and just as I reached the door Draven’s eyes opened. He found me, and in a moment everything that had been, that could have been, passed between us, fractured, shattered, falling to the stone around me.

I wanted to tell him I was sorry. I wanted to fall to my knees and hold his face in my hands. I wanted to beg someone, anyone, to stop the blood seeping out of him.

I did none of those things. I didn’t know how to do any of those things. I slipped through the door, proving once again that I was the coward he said I was, and tore down the stairs, seeing nothing but the memory of his eyes as he’d watched me leave.

When I reached the bottom of the staircase, I touched my face, and found it wet with tears.