Page 59 of Happily Undead in Dark River

“I need two houses and the Immortal Cupcake warded against Lucius.” His eyes quickly dart to me. Miranda placed a hand on his arm, before Nico could move away. Her eyebrows arched prettily, and she looked between Nico and me. “You too?”

She appraised me and seemed to find me wanting, yet again.

Nico kept his expression cool. There was no love lost between Vampires and Witches apparently. “What is the cost?”

She looked at him appraisingly. “You know the answer. A quart of your–” she stopped herself. “No. A quart of her blood.”

Nico was shaking his head. “No.”

I didn’t see what the big deal was. I’d had barely a taste of Nico’s blood, and it was like drinking tequila in a hot tub after not eating for a week. It blew your socks clean off and then flung them into the next State. Honestly, if she wanted my weak fledgling blood, then I was all for it. Was I a little worried she might do voodoo on it and make my tits fall off? Maybe a touch. “Sure. I don’t see why not.”

I’m not sure if it was the calculating look in Miranda’s eye as she grabbed my hand and palmed her ceremonial dagger, or the sight of my blood itself that made me feel a little clammy, but suddenly a cold sweat ran down my spine. The ceremonial knife slid right through my flesh like it was butter, and I didn’t feel a thing until I watched it bleed. And then that bitch hurt. She must have clipped a tendon. To distract myself, I looked at the swirls of the knife, the blackened indentations that were probably dried blood and I was suddenly really glad that I couldn’t get hepatitis anymore. When she’d filled a tiny little glass bottle of my blood, she released my wrist. She gave Judge a cool look. Guess they still weren’t BFF’s. “Are you going to lick it clean like last time?” she said haughtily.

X laughed, a cold humorless sound, and grabbed my hand. “Waste not, want not, right Love?” And then his tongue lapped over the cut in a way that was completely pornographic and went straight to my lady bits. He lapped at it like it was an ice cream coated nipple, and I suddenly forgot what we were doing and who I was.

Judge was still having a stare-off with his former lover, Nico was looking at us like we’d all gone mad and Walker was pinching the bridge of his nose like he was wondering if he could retire to the mountains somewhere and become a hermit. Only Tex was focused solely on me, and that was probably because I was so wound up by X’s tongue bath I smelled like McDonald's after a hunger strike.

Finally, the silent stare-off between Miranda and Judge must have reached its climax, because the witch shrugged and got to work, warding everything.

We did the whole knife door ritual again because it was hard to ward a place to keep one vampire out. It was easier to ward all vampires out and then make an exception. “Unless you have some of Lucius’ blood just lying around?”

I looked hopefully at Nico, because how could I do this ritual at the Immortal Cupcake and keep it open. Then I mentally slapped myself. I wasn’t reopening the Immortal Cupcake. I wasn’t going to step into my friend's life like I had the right, after it was my fault her world turned to shit.

When I said to skip the Immortal Cupcake until we got some of Lucius’ blood, Miranda had grinned. “You say that like he’d just hand it over. Good luck, Fledgling. Witches have been trying to take Lucius down since he subjugated his very first one over a millennia ago. The beast is meticulous about not leaving behind any part of his DNA for our uses. But if you do manage to get some? My Coven will pay you whatever you desire to have it.”

Duly noted. It would be nice to have some bargaining power over the witches, though I wanted nothing to do with supernatural politics. I just wanted to stay in my small town, have copious amounts of sex with way too many hot guys and live a reasonably happy eternity. Was that too much to ask?

She held up my vial of blood to the moonlight, twisting and turning it as if she could divine all my secrets just from looking at it. Hell, maybe she could. It just looked like blood to me, leeched of its ruby color by the starless night. She opened up her interdimensional vagina portal and smiled at me. “I will see you soon, Raine Baxter. But damn you have an ugly shaped head. For the sake of us all…” She paused, and my scalp began to itch. When I put my hands up to scratch it, I felt a hand fulls of my hair. I looked at the locks, the same ruby color they’d been before. She looked between X and Judge. “Take care of them.”

Judge stepped forward and halted her with a hand on her wrist, and she looked down at the appendage with such sad, resigned longing. Hell, maybe she had loved Judge once, rather than just wanting the thrill of the chase like Judge had suggested. I bared my fangs. I didn’t care if she’d just restored my hair, Judge was mine.

I must have let out a tiny growl, because both Miranda and Judge looked over at me, and X laughed hysterically.

Judge reached out and handed Miranda a second vial. “Payment. We are square.”

Miranda nodded, tucking it into the pouch that hung on her waist. Then the slit collapsed in on itself and she was gone. I looked at Judge, who would be a mean poker player because his face gave nothing away.

“Payment?”

He nodded, coming over to wrap an arm around me. He didn’t look nervous or guilty or anything like that this time. “To secure my way through the ward at Nîso the first time. Brody was there, it was all above board, but I would have gutted her and used her blood to cross the Ward if she’d disagreed. You were dying. I needed to get to you.”

Fuck me. Be still my beating heart because that was the most romantic thing I’d ever heard that contained the words gutted and dying. I kissed him gently. “Let's go to bed,” I said softly, walking with him across the threshold of the house. He held his breath, waiting for the zap to his nuts that always happened the last time Miranda had done a ward for me. But nothing happened. I let out a relieved sigh, but I remained cautious. I wasn’t stupid enough to think that Miranda was suddenly over he love/hate relationship with my sexy-as-sin drifter. When everyone was through the door, I let out a relieved sigh. I struggled to keep my eyes open as I walked to my bedroom. I could hear the guys chatting in the kitchen, but none of them tried to follow me. Somehow they must have known I wanted space. Or maybe they just rathered each other's company to the sound of my snores. Either way, I was beyond caring. I wanted a nap and several days of uninterrupted sleep.

When my head hit the pillow, I was out like the dead. Literally.

Tex makingcoffee woke me the following morning, and I slipped out from under Judge and Walker’s assorted body parts to shuffle to the kitchen. My body had decided it had slept enough, and now it was screaming for caffeine.

As I shuffled through my living room, someone knocked lightly on my door. I was going to blame the lack of caffeine and my confidence in Miranda’s wards for opening it like a dumbass.

Standing at my door was a youngish guy, with pale skin, big black eyes. He was looking at the ground perplexed, and I looked down too.

Fuck.

“Did you realize there was a severed head on your doorstep?” The man asked, and I sighed.

“No. But I can’t say I’m surprised.” I didn’t recognize the face which was both a relief and a cause for concern. “Can I help you with something?” The dude might have had a young face, but he had a real big energy. He also had a rapid heartbeat that marked him as alive and some serious heat blowing off him that he could almost be a furnace.

The man grinned, and I felt Tex come up behind me, his body vibrating with… something? Fear? Terror? Excitement?

I didn’t want to take my eyes off the stranger to judge what it was.

“Forgive my rudeness. I am Alexander. I believe you have found my progeny?”

Alexander. Alexander? Why did that name sound familiar.

When the shoe dropped, all the blood left in my body dropped away from my face and fell to the floor.

Holy Mother of Fucking Dragons.