Page 25

ALICE

It was strange lying in this bed with him. Strange and comforting. His arms and legs were wrapped around me as if he never wanted to let me go again, and I didn't mind it.

I had never been the spooning type. I enjoyed sex, but I had always preferred to sleep alone after. Now though… I think I can get used to this , my mind whispered as I listened to Xyrek's slow and deep breathing. He had fallen asleep soon after our second round of sex.

That sex!

Oh my God, I could get used to that, too. It was addictive.

I wiggled my ass closer against his already growing erection. Even in his sleep, he wanted me, which gave my self-confidence a boost I hadn't expected. This man was unlocking parts of me I hadn’t even realized were locked down. Slowly, steadily, he was shifting the ground beneath my feet—and somehow, I didn’t want to run from it. He was changing me in ways I never saw coming… ways that felt good. Real. Like happiness wasn’t just possible but already happening, right here—with him. It was like he was making himself my anchor… no, that wasn't right. I was the one forging the attachment, like I wanted to be anchored to him. It should have been impossible given the short while we had known each other, and probably would have never been possible on Earth. But here, now? Things were so different. Near-death experiences had a way of changing your perspective.

I had never been a live-in-the-moment kind of girl. I liked plans. But what good had that done for me? It got me abducted by aliens, that's what. So, for the first time in my life, I decided to live dangerously and allow myself to fall.

I closed my eyes, smiling, still waiting for my mind to let go and allow me a few hours of rest. But there was too much traffic in my brain to take my exhausted body into consideration. It was hard to believe how I was changing, how one person could make me change like this.

My independence had always been my greatest motivator. I had always told myself I didn't need anyone and had made a point of not letting anyone close to me. Not even my friends who had sheltered me. Even after I realized it was a defense mechanism born from years of neglect and abuse, I never felt the urge to change it—until now.

I thought back over everything that had happened today since Xyrek’s ship landed. Daisy had been a pain in my ass the entire journey to Rottvan, but part of me had enjoyed her company. I wouldn't have sought it out, but Daisy had done enough of that for the both of us. She was traveling on to Pandrax in the morning, and I was glad I’d had the chance to tell her goodbye. Hopefully, I would get to see her holocasts soon and become her biggest fan. After leaving Daisy and sorting things out with the Commander, I’d packed my few belongings, a lot more than I had when I came to Astrionis, including the comm and tools Xyrek had given me, and we went back to his spaceship. He set course for Darlam, the planet he mentioned earlier. As he did, he filled me in on what Lord Protector Garth had told him. The other Space Guardians and their mates were probably already there.

I wasn't sure how long I lay there, and I was just about to drift off when Xyrek stiffened behind me—not the part that was already hard, his entire body. His feet began to move as if he were running, and his breathing increased. He screamed out a name, startling me into an upright position.

"Allisaahn!" his voice sounded so tortured, so full of pain, that tears welled in my eyes.

I turned and began shaking him. "Xyrek! Xyrek! Wake up!"

He lunged up and wrapped me in his arms. "Allisaahn!"

The eerie similarity to my name sent goosebumps down my spine. I broke free of his hold and grabbed his face with both hands. "Xyrek!"

His startled eyes ripped open. I stared into their black abyss, and all I saw was pain. With a cry, he pulled me back into his arms and kissed my face; his hands moved up and down my body as if he were trying with all his might to reassure himself I was still alive.

"Xyrek, what happened? Did you have a bad dream?"

"Dream?" he nearly scoffed, shaking his head. "I wish."

"What happened?"

Shadows danced over his tortured expression from the sparse light in the room; it was still night. Agitated, he brushed a hand through his hair, then brought it back to my body as if he couldn't bear the thought of not touching me.

"Allisaahn," he repeated, sending more goosebumps up and down my spine and creating a very discomforting sensation in my stomach. Deep down in my bones, I felt I didn't want to hear whatever he had to say. That I wasn't ready for it. Would never be ready for it. Judging by the expression he regarded me with, Xyrek didn't seem to think I could handle the truth either. And that, more than anything, scared the crap out of me.

"It was just a dream." I tried to soothe him. "Sometimes they seem so real that it's hard to…" I trailed off because of his expression.

"I know the difference between a dream and reality, Alice.” Hearing him say my name made me feel cold inside, so much so that I had to rub my arms to keep the circulation going. "This wasn't a dream. I remember everything."

"What do you mean?"

"I know where I belong, I know what species I am, and I know what happened to us."

"You're scaring me."

His expression was grim, almost haunted. "You should be scared."

For a moment, weakness overcame me, and I wondered— what have I gotten myself into ? I should have known better than to take a ride with a perfect stranger. Wasn't that what everyone always said? In my case, it was a spaceship, but I didn't feel like being technical at that moment. Was Xyrek insane? That's why they taught you not to get too close to anyone you didn't know well. The old timers had it right when they said to wait until after marriage to have sex or move in together. Even an arranged marriage didn't sound so bad right then. Anything but being in bed together with an obvious madman on our way to an unknown planet to meet more Space Guardians. For all I knew, he could have made that up, too.

You really did it this time, Al , I chastised myself. Forget getting in a car with strangers. You're out in space—in space —with a man who could very well be a psychopath . Way to go !

But that moment only lasted a few seconds. The more my brain attacked me and my questionable choices, the more I became convinced that Xyrek wasn't a psychopath. It might have simply been a defense mechanism because I really, really liked him, but I didn't think so. This was deeper. Much deeper. I cared for him in ways I never had with anyone before. And if I was wrong, well, then fuck it. I was fully committed to going down with him. This wasn't about me any longer; this was about me trusting another person and wanting to be there for them. I gave up on my family, but I would be damned if I ever gave up on him. No matter where this journey would take us, I would be with him every step of the way. And if I were wrong, fine. Then I would burn for being wrong, but I would burn laughing.

I had a feeling that whatever he had to say would not only shake me to the core but also change anything and everything I had ever believed in. And suddenly, that was fine with me. I wasn't a supporting actor any longer; I was the heroine in this story, and heroines had to endure a lot before they got their happily ever after. And if that was what it took to be with him, bring it on !