Page 5 of Guarded by the Yeti (Monster Security Agency)
Chapter Five
Kaelthar
Oscar is a Sasquatch, or a Sassie, as everyone calls his kind. All the Yetis I know that have left the Himalayas have a Sassie sponsor, or therapist. We have trouble integrating in a society that is so different from ours, and especially the Yetis that are not mated have a harder time. Like me. Sassies understand humans, and a lot of them have hybrid families, so they’re hybrids themselves.
Oscar is half Sassie and half human. You wouldn’t be able to tell if you saw him, as he’s a beast of a monster, almost as tall as I am, covered in brown fur from head to toe, but his personality is so human that sometimes it’s even hard for me to relate to him. Decades ago, Sassies used to have the same “ailment” as Yetis: going berserk around ovulating females. They’ve conquered their nature, and that’s what Yetis strive to learn from them.
Oscar has been my therapist since I moved to the US, and three months ago, I was convinced I was fine, better than ever, and that I could deal with my issue on my own. It turns out I was wrong. Now I’m pacing in the snow, phone pressed to my ear. It’s embarrassing to admit that Ysella is making me doubt I ever made any progress.
“Slow down, Kaelthar. Stop blaming yourself. Take a deep breath, and let’s try to get to the root of the problem.”
I do as he says. I take three deep breaths and push the air out slowly. My breath turns to mist. Focusing on my surrounding helps. I ground myself in the here and now, take in the serene landscape, and tell myself that it’s okay. I’ve got this. I’m in my element. I almost lost it a few minutes ago, but instead, I called my therapist. I’m not a beast that goes insane around a woman. I’m a rational creature that can fight this and win.
“What do we know? That you don’t do well around women.”
I can hear him moving around. If I had to guess, he’s going into his kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee. Oscar is addicted to coffee. He drinks at least ten cups a day. Monsters like us need to consume extra if we want to feel the slightest effect.
“Still, you accepted this job,” he continues. “Why?”
“I couldn’t get out of it. Lucia insisted. And you know me... I can’t say no to Lucia.”
“I know that you’re a bit of a people pleaser, Kaelthar.” It’s like I can hear the smile in his voice. “Especially when it comes to a lady who asks nicely.”
“Or not so nicely,” I grumble. “Doesn’t matter. I can’t say no.”
“I have a theory. Do you want to hear it?”
I sigh loudly. “I don’t know...” I scratch behind my ear.
“It has nothing to do with your being a people pleaser.”
“No?”
“No. I believe that if you truly thought you’re a danger to this woman you’re protecting, you would’ve told your handler and refused the job.” I don’t say anything, so he goes on. “Knowing you’d have to be so close to your client, sharing such a small place, you wouldn’t have risked it. You’re a good man, Kaelthar, despite the challenges your biology is throwing at you. I believe you accepted the job because you need companionship. And because the pledge of celibacy you made a year ago isn’t working out for you.”
I grit my teeth. It’s true. A year ago, I pledged to be celibate. For life. Because my desire to mate – triggered by any woman during ovulation – makes it impossible for me to determine if the women I’m attracted to are good potential mates. I’ve noticed myself too many times wanting to ravage a woman, only for the sentiment to go away completely the next day, whether the ravaging had happened or not. A few times, I even thought Lucia was perfect for me.
“What does this mean?” I ask. “I don’t get what you’re saying.”
“What I’m saying, Kaelthar, is that you saw this woman, and you felt something.”
“Yes, I felt that I should protect her. She’s gone through the sort of trauma not even you, with your psychology degree, would understand.”
“I think it’s more than that. You’ve been alone for so long, you need companionship. And when her brother asked you to take her away, you saw an opportunity to be with this beautiful creature, just the two of you, together, at the end of the world. There’s nothing wrong with that. Look at you, you’re protecting her honor. You’re not taking advantage of her, even though she nearly jumped your bones a few minutes ago. You gently rejected her and went out for a walk. You’re doing great!”
I take a few more deep breaths and release them into the frigid air. I’m feeling better. Oscar’s words are soothing, reassuring. He’s right. It might feel like I’m failing because I desire her so much, but in fact, I’m handling it well. I don’t even have an erection anymore. I’ve been talking to Oscar for the past half hour, so it would be weird to still have a hard-on.
“Thank you,” I say. “I think you’re right. I don’t want to hurt her. I don’t want to take advantage of her.”
“Good. Are you feeling better?”
“Yes.” I grin. “Much better.”
“Are you ready to go back inside and behave like a proper gentleman?”
“I think so, yeah.”
We say our goodbyes, and Oscar makes me promise to call him whenever I need another pep talk. Well, I guess this means I’m back in therapy.
I return to the cabin and remember at the last moment that I was supposed to bring in firewood. I circle the house, go into the shed, and fill my arms. The freezing winter air has cleared my head and cooled my body. It’s as dark as when we arrived, and while I’m used to it, I hope it won’t bring Ysella’s spirits down even more. I know that humans can have a hard time near the North Pole. They don’t deal well with not seeing the face of the sun.
When I enter the living room, I find Ysella on her knees in front of the fireplace, stoking the fire. I decide it’s fine to sit next to her. Nothing will happen. I won’t lose it.
She turns to me and gives me a questioning look, as if to ask why I’ve been gone so long.
“I went for a walk.” No reason to lie. “I needed to clear my head.” I throw two logs into the fire. “Listen... about before. It won’t happen again. It can’t. You are my client, and I am your bodyguard. I will keep you here, safe, until your brother lets the MSA know that we can return, and then we won’t even see each other again.”
My heart aches as I say the last words. Is that what I want? To finish this job and never see her again? With all the other women, it was only lust. Ysella is different. Just the fact that I want to fight my lust so badly tells me she’s different.
“This is for the best. Don’t you agree?”
She shakes her head.
I sigh. “I think it’s for the best.”
I look at her white hair. So close to the fire, it shines in warm tones. I want to reach out and touch it, but of course I don’t. I will suppress this urge like I’m going to suppress all of them. It’s like she reads my mind, because she reaches over to touch my long beard. I pull back a little, and her fingers linger in the air. She looks disappointed.
“This isn’t because I don’t like you,” I say. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. And your hair suits you even better now.” I chuckle awkwardly, and she gives me a smile. “We can go for a walk tomorrow, if you want. You’ll blend in with the landscape.” Now she laughs a silent laugh. It reminds me that she can’t talk. At least, that’s my conclusion. “You know what? I have a notebook around here somewhere. I should have a pen, too. What if I bring them to you, and then you can write down what you want to do?” She nods. “Yes?” I smile, relieved. “Be right back.”
It takes me a few minutes of rummaging through various drawers to find what I need. I’m not the type who uses pen and paper. Finally, I find an old, yellowed notebook and a pencil that’s been sharpened too many times. I don’t even know where I got it. Then I remember it’s a leftover from when I built my cabin and had to take measurements. I bring them to Ysella, and she reaches for them greedily. She scribbles something and shows it to me.
“I want to play the piano,” the note says.
“Piano.”
She gives me a broad smile, straightens her back and starts playing on an imaginary keyboard.
“Right. I assume it helps take your mind off...” The terrible things she’s seen. Her parents being chopped into pieces in front of her. “Playing the piano is your escape.”
She nods, and that seals it. I can’t say no to her. I don’t have a piano, and I don’t know where to get a piano, but those are just details.
“Okay. I’ll take care of it tomorrow.”
She throws her arms around me, and I’m too slow to pull away. Correction: I don’t pull away because I don’t want to. She clings to my neck, and I let her.
I can’t deny I’d love to hear her play.