Page 30 of Grimm County Wishes (Grimm County Lawmen #4)

“ W ell, well, well.” Christian rubbed his hands together. “Our little Al is growing up. It’s about damn time!” He raised his beer mug into the air, foam sloshing over the top as it collided with the other mugs.

“He’s been whoring so long, I was worried he might never slow down. Least, not before the syphilis took him,” Mr. Bill added, playing with the zipper on his purple velour track suit. Which he was wearing shirtless. Obviously.

Al rolled his eyes and glanced at his watch.

Lindsey had insisted on a “family advice” scene before they left town with the final three women.

Unfortunately, Al had no family, at least none that he wanted to admit to.

Jeannie said she’d handle it and had convinced Christian, Nick, and Mr. Bill to participate.

He was still in shock. Well, not so much about Christian.

Jeannie had probably talked to Marina first and she would have made Christian participate.

And Mr. Bill, well, it made sense to have an elder-type person, and better Mr. Bill than Ms. June.

But Nick? He had no idea how she’d managed to convince him to film a scene.

It was like pulling teeth to get him to tape for Grimm County Lawmen.

The table went awkwardly silent, the three of them sipping their beers while Lindsey glared from the side. What was he supposed to do? He’d never had one of these conversations before.

Nick prodded Christian with his elbow, nodding toward Christian’s hand.

“Oh! Right.” He raised his palm, lowering his eyes to look underneath. “You are two dates away from proposing. What will you be looking in order to make your decision?”

“Oh, good question, Sheriff Prude.” Mr. Bill tipped his glass toward Christian before taking a sip.

“Yeah, that actually is a really good question.” Al’s brow furrowed. Lindsey was grinning now. “But, um, I guess I’m looking for someone with wife material.” Whatever the fuck that meant.

“The fuck does that mean?” Nick asked.

Al groaned. “I have no idea. I heard it somewhere.”

“It’s different for everyone,” Mr. Bill answered.

“For some, like our sheriff here, wife material includes stellar cooking skills. Someone who can whip up a perfect Sunday meal and have dinner on the table every night.” Mr. Bill’s eyes twinkled as he looked at the sheriff.

They were neighbors, and Mr. Bill knew full well how disastrous Marina’s cooking skills were.

“Someone who cares for you.” They all turned to look at Nick, shocked that he was taking part in the conversation. “Makes soup when you’re sick. Buys snacks you like, even if she hates them. Wife is for life. Little things matter.”

Al paled. A wife is for life . The twenty thousand dollar wedding show bonus would be nice, but the only person he’d ever pictured himself marrying was Jeannie.

“I couldn’t have said it better myself, Beast.” Christian patted his friend on the shoulder. “So, tell us, Al, what are the little things that matter to you?”

“Someone I can laugh with. I learned growing up in the trailer park, you can get through even the most dismal circumstance if you can laugh.”

“That’s an excellent one.” Mr. Bill nodded. “My Peggy Sue was always quick to laugh, which was good because no one else thought my jokes were funny.”

Al scratched his chin, thinking more about the question. “I also like a woman who can solve problems. Like assess the situation, figure out what needs to be done. If she needs my help, I’m here for that. But if she can handle it on her own, well, that’s damn sexy in my book.”

“Anything else?” Christian asked .

“Uh, well, someone who is kind. Kindness is huge. My mom was a nightmare.” He shrugged when he saw Lindsey flinch, but the three men all nodded in agreement. “I’ve seen enough meanness to last a lifetime, so I want someone kind.”

“Laughter, problem solver, kind. Know someone like that?” Nick asked, pinning him with a glare.

“I, uh, well …” He did know someone like that. Someone who lived right next to him and made his heart swell just thinking about her.

“What about their performance in the sack?” Mr. Bill asked.

“Damnit, Bill!” Christian scolded.

“The sack?” Al squeaked, glancing at the camera. “I’m not sure that’s really appropriate.”

“The hell it’s not.” Mr. Bill slapped his hand on the table. “You can’t marry someone without making sure you’re compatible first. Everyone knows that. Now what kind of woman do you want between the sheets? Kinky? Shy? Dominating?”

“Uh, well, I’m not talking about that.” Al buried his face behind his beer. Now was not the time to remember his night with Jeannie. The way her body melded into his, the way he came so hard he almost passed out.

The table grew silent again when Nick again pointed to Christian’s hand.

“Yep!” He sat up straight and peered at his palm. “What if the woman doesn’t want to live in North Carolina? Are you prepared to mow—uh, move—away?” Christian’s head drew back.

“Move away? What the hell? Who said anything about moving? Are you moving, Al? Where did you get these ladies from? You know we have lots of great women here.”

“I haven’t talked to them about that yet. Mercedes is from Texas, and Iona is from somewhere. Jersey, maybe? I had assumed because they did the show, they were willing to move.”

Mr. Bill chuckled. “Boy, you must know better than that. You can’t assume a woman is going to pack up and move a bunch of states away just to be with you.”

“I can’t?” Al was confused. They already knew where he lived. And was this conversation even necessary? He wasn’t even sure he was going to propose. He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling hot and itchy all the sudden.

“Al, seriously, you cannot move away,” Christian said, setting his mug on the table. “You are a key member of the sheriff’s office. I don’t know anyone who could fill your shoes. I’d be gutted to lose you. ”

Al’s hand dropped. What did his boss just say? He looked to the camera, then back at Christian. Right, the cameras. Damn, that man could put on a show.

“I’m not saying this because of the cameras, dumbass.”

Okay, was everybody a mind reader now?

“I’m saying this because I mean it. You are the heart of our department. I admit I originally hired you because I knew you’d be good for the show’s ratings and we needed the first season to be a success.”

Al shrugged and nodded. That was fair, and he wasn’t offended. He’d only applied because of the show.

“And sure, the first year you spent more time taking selfies than statements.”

Again, fair. He had blown off the first year, thinking he was biding his time until a bigger offer came through.

He went on calls, patrolled his beat, but his heart wasn’t in it.

But then Halloween came, and several of the kids in one of his neighborhoods had dressed up as Deputy Al.

They walked around the neighborhood, escorting the younger kids and keeping them safe. And something inside Al shifted.

“It was like a switch flipped or something, and you started actually doing work. You became a real deputy. And with your past, uh,” he looked toward the camera and back at Al, “struggles, with law enforcement, you are perfectly empathetic with our citizens. You know exactly when to crack down and when to cut someone a break. I hope you find love, I really do, but please try to pick someone who won’t take you away from us. ”

Nick grunted with a nod. “Been knowing you a long time. Good kid, even better man. Like having you around.”

Al’s throat tightened, and if they kept going, the tears that were threatening to come out might fall and embarrass him on TV. Although maybe that was okay. Emotionally available men were currently trending.

“Marriage is a partnership,” Mr. Bill added with a knowing smile.

“And the number one necessity for a strong partnership is communication. So whoever you have feelings for, talk to her about what you want in a relationship and listen to what she wants. Being the star of the show doesn’t make your needs more important.

If anything, your needs are gonna be in the toilet when she watches the replay of all your whoring. ”

“I’ve not been—ugh, whatever. I appreciate all the advice. Anything else?” Al nodded toward Christian’s hand, where he was pretty sure Marina had written him a cheat sheet.

Christian took a final peek. “Keep your eyes open and you might find that the thing you’ve been looking for has been in front of you the whole time.” He shrugged .

“Did you read that off a fortune cookie?” Mr. Bill asked.

“Um, not a fortune cookie, no. Why, you got a better line?” Christian asked.

“Yes.” Mr. Bill rubbed his hands together and placed them flat on the table. “Your heart will know before your brain does. And once they are both in sync, put a ring on it.”

“Thanks. Nick? Any last pearls of wisdom before I head out?”

“Don’t fuck it up. A good woman will forgive you, but she’ll have a limit. Don’t push past her limit.”

Al nodded. That was good advice. But what was Jeannie’s limit? Not that it mattered. But if it did matter. Did she have a limit, and had things already gone too far?