Page 24 of Glimmer and Burn (Unity #1)

The kiss with Devin that had made her body feel things she’d never felt before.

Made her knees weak. She’d dream about that kiss forever, there was no denying it.

She hadn’t intended to kiss him like that, either.

Once her mouth had touched his, instinct took over.

It had been thrilling, tantalizing. If she was only going to get one chance to kiss a rogue in a dark room, then she wanted to make the most of it.

It was probably sloppy and amateur, she’d been hasty and clumsy.

Dragging him down over the desk hadn’t been intentional.

She had just wanted him closer, but her damn dress was in the way.

Next thing she knew she was falling backward, and his arm had braced next to her and the sound he made… she had felt it everywhere.

She wished she could focus on the bliss of that stolen moment, but the threat hanging over her threatened to crush any solace she sought.

Once again, Graves had undermined every facet of her strength.

Her fear. Her worry. He had her trembling when Miranda knew she was strong.

It was mortifying. And then her father and his rude comments…

she’d just left Devin to fend for himself.

She had never felt worse than she did right then. Like her world was falling apart around her and she was utterly helpless to do anything.

The carriage arrived home, and Cordelia ushered her away from their chattering mother to her room. Lady Wilde took the hint and decided to wait on their father for more information, allowing Miranda to retreat with Cordelia.

“We can await father here,” Cordelia said, “I’m not sure what’s happened, Miri, but you have never looked so shaken.”

“I’m not really okay to talk about it,” Miranda said, she shirked off the full skirts and all the tedious layers until she was in just a chemise and curled onto her bed. “It was awful, Delia.”

Cordelia flopped next to her and began to pluck pins from her hair, smoothing out the strands as she went. “Shh, I’m sure it won’t seem as bad in the morning.”

“I’m sure it will.”

Cordelia laughed and Miranda sat up. It had been so long since she heard her sister laugh, let alone smile or visit her room or talk to her. Just last year they had shared each other’s every confidence, now Miranda felt like a stranger, uncertain on what she should say or how to say it.

“Why have you been shutting me out all this time?” Miranda asked, and her sister’s soothing gestures stopped.

Cordelia looked away. “I find…it’s easier to not talk about it. And I know you, Miri, you’ll only try and tell me how awful he is and how I should not marry him. But that would only make the reality all the harder, because mother and father are set on it and I…I don’t have a choice.”

“You can tell them, Delia, tell them you don’t want to marry him.”

“Oh, yes, it’s so easy to tell our parents when we want our own way.

You don’t understand. You’re their precious guardian daughter.

The one with all the power who will continue with the grand tradition of guardians in the family.

I’m their feeble human daughter whose only use is to find a good enough match to offset my deficiencies.

You have been loved by all and paraded around your whole life.

Everyone wants to know the society princess.

I am the afterthought. No one remembers Cordelia Wilde, when there is Miranda. ”

Miranda wanted to shake her head and deny all of it, that her sister was not second to her, was so much more than a ‘feeble human’ but she realized with a sinking feeling that Cordelia was right.

At least, about how the world viewed her and how her accomplishments had always been shadowed to the prestige of Miranda’s blood.

Her heart broke for her sister, who she had always viewed as worthy, but perhaps, had not realized that the view from across the hall might be different from across the street.

Even her parents, though Miranda wanted to believe they would never consciously hurt either of their children, were guilty of setting Miranda on a higher pedestal, with higher standards, with greater expectations.

“Don’t fret over it, Miri, I’m…well, there is nothing I can do. I can’t change what I am and I’ve found solace in—” A mischievous glint returned to Cordelia’s eye, a spark Miranda thought long buried. “Well, let’s just say I’ve found ways to cope.”

“You could have come to me,” Miranda started, guilt warring with everything else.

“You’re right, I would have rattled on about how much I think Graves is a snake and hardly appropriate to marry a slug, let alone my favorite sister.

” Cordelia’s smile reminded her of how they often joked about favorites when it was only ever just the pair of them.

“But if you had told me that is not what you needed, I would have stopped. I just wanted to be there for you and, maybe, you would not have had to endure all this alone.”

“I suppose I was a bit closed off—”

“Closed off? You haven’t spoken to me for nearly two months aside from pleasantries at the dining table or over tea.”

“Well. I don’t know.” She pushed Miranda backward, and Miranda fell over, always allowing Cordelia to best her and feel stronger. Only , had she just pretended to fall? Cordelia’s shove had grown more forceful and the shoulder she’d shoved twinged.

The sisters sat in silence for a few moments.

As they had when they were children waiting for mother or father to come in and deliver the punishment for whatever they’d broken or causing a ruckus at the worst moments or locking nanny in the closet.

They didn’t say it aloud, but both knew that they would continue to grin and bear it.

Neither of them were very brave about standing up to their parents. Miranda was afraid they wouldn’t believe her. Cordelia was afraid she’d disappoint them. Though, perhaps it was time to stop being scared.

Miranda knew her father had returned when she heard her mother’s stern voice rising even from the lower foyer. Cordelia made a break for her own bedroom, kissing Miranda’s cheek and whispering ‘good luck.’

Miranda quickly buried herself in her covers. Hopefully, her father would allow her the small mercy of waiting until morning to scold her. She shut her eyes, feigning sleep, until she opened them again to a sky full of stars and a tense silence.

Miranda rolled onto her back to stare at the canopy of her bed.

She was not going to find rest tonight. Instead, she leapt to her feet and pulled on the first dress she saw that she could do up herself.

She had to make sure Devin was alright. And…

her stomach flipped, a jolt of nerves rioting down to her toes.

She was not seeking him out for any other reason than to check on him.

It was not because she wanted to kiss him again.

They could never kiss again, because that would mean admitting she found him even somewhat likable and Miranda hated to lose.

Though, she wanted to think he had enjoyed kissing her, at least. She may not be suited for him—he would surely look down on her innocence and circumstances—but it would be nice to know she hadn’t made a fool of herself.

Like she had with Graves and her father.

Miranda opened her window and nimbly climbed down. So much had gone wrong, certainly the worst was behind her for the moment.