Page 42 of Gamble (Black Light #38)

They’d stopped swaying the music, standing rooted in one spot as other dancers continued swaying around them. Reagan took a deep breath and looked into Elijah’s intense grey eyes.

Be brave. Say it.

“I guess because I’ve been waiting for you to recover enough so that you could take me to your club.”

Elijah looked confused. “What? You want to go back to Runway? We can still go there even if I don’t work there.”

“Not Runway, silly.” She paused, her heart hammering against her ribs as she looked deep into his eyes.

“I can’t get the picture of that naked woman getting whipped while strapped to the St. Andrew’s Cross out of my head.

Of course, I didn’t know it was called that until I Googled it after I got home. ”

The color drained from Elijah’s face as her pulse raced. It was his turn to look surprised. “Wait, a minute. How the hell did you... who told you about... showed you...” He stammered, truly in shock.

“Nalani. And don’t you dare get mad at her,” Reagan said quickly.

“How? When?” Elijah’s pointed questions were loud enough that she could feel some of the couples closest to them on the dance floor glancing their way.

Reagan leaned in closer so he could hear her over the music.

“The weekend before your surgery. I was so angry with you. So hurt.” She let the pain of that time seep into her delivery.

She could see him processing her words, remembering that she’d told him about meeting his friends.

“You know that I stormed into Runway demanding to see the manager, and that’s when I met Madison.

At first, when she said she was the manager, I thought you’d lied to me.

That you didn’t actually work there after all. ”

Reagan’s words came faster and faster and she confessed the secret she’d been holding back for weeks.

“But then she took me to this private dining room where Jaxson, Chase, and Emma, and so many more of your friends were having a dinner party.

Of course, Shane and Nalani were there too.

After I got over the utter shock of being in a room with so many truly famous people, I begged them all to tell me the truth of why you had ghosted me.

It blew me away that not only did they all know you, but they all seemed to even know who I was.

Before Elijah could break in, she continued on with her story.

“At first, Jaxson refused to let any of the employees disclose personal information about you, their co-worker. But finally, Nalani was brave and stood up to him and said that since she no longer worked at Runway, she could say whatever she wanted to.”

“That little... nosy...”

“Friend?” Reagan supplied with a small smile.

“Something,” he muttered, but she could see he wasn’t truly angry “So, if you’ve known about Black Light this whole time, why the hell haven’t you said anything?” His voice was strained with what might have been hope and fear in equal measure.

“Because, like you, I’ve been waiting for you to recover, and... to be honest, I needed time to get my head wrapped around it all. I just didn’t see the point in bringing it up until we could see where this—where we—were going.”

“And now?” His voice was rough with emotion. “Why are you bringing it up now?” He pressed.

“Well, I admit, part of me doesn’t want to see you quit a job that you love, and I know that you do love it, don’t you?”

He nodded before pulling her even tighter into his arms. Elijah’s gaze was smoldering as he asked, “And what about the other part of you?”

Reagan decided to hold nothing back. They needed complete honesty if this was going to work.

“The biggest reason is that I’m fascinated by what I saw and have read so far.

I won’t lie. The idea of turning myself completely over to you scares the bejesus out of me, and I’m not entirely sure I’m going to end up loving the lifestyle like you do, but I do know this: the thought of walking away and never experiencing the true Elijah Keaton unleashed in his dungeon scares me more. ”

The look that crossed his face was so intense it took her breath away.

“Baby, I don’t deserve you. And you need to listen to me, Reagan, because this is so important. I’ll walk away from Black Light in a heartbeat if you decide it isn’t for you.”

“I’d never ask you to give it up for me.”

“You don’t have to ask,” he said simply. “That’s what men do when they’re in love. They do whatever it takes to make the woman they love happy. And that’s all I care about. Making you happy.”

The word ‘love’ hung between them like a promise, and Reagan felt tears prick her eyes.

This time, they weren’t from the wedding’s romantic atmosphere but from the overwhelming realization that she had truly fallen in love with a man who would sacrifice his happiness for hers.

Who wouldn’t force her to change into a watered down version of herself.

“God, I love you.” Her words spilled out.

“I love you more, Reagan Murphy, and I would be honored if you would trust me enough to introduce you to the darker side of my personality.”