Page 63 of Galaxy Gladiators Romance Box Set #11-19
Chapter Two
Z oey
I’m in the lee of Steele’s arms as we wait for the gangway to lower. There are too many of us to cram into the exit area, so some people have spilled out into the hallway. Neither our sister ship, the Devil’s Playground , nor the pirate ship has landed yet, so it will just be us and the folks from Sanctuary.
We freed them only a few months ago, but they have already celebrated three matings, and Bayne and Willa who used to be on our ship and chose to stay on Sanctuary, have a young one on the way. Bayne’s a canine shifter, and Willa sent word back to our ship that when he bit her during their mating, it eventually turned her into a shifter, too. I’m thrilled for them. I can’t wait to see their baby.
I grind my teeth together and squeeze my eyes shut as I try to force the words “race mixing” and “abomination” from my mind. It’s not just the words, I actually hear my father’s voice reverberating in my head.
Yes, Papa, I know, I know. A shifter is an abomination, a shifter baby is an abomination, a human mating an alien is an abomination. If my father knew what happens between Steele and me in our bed, it would bring down my father’s wrath.
I close my eyes for a moment and picture pushing him out the door of my mind and slamming it closed. I open my eyes and savor the peace that comes without his voice on perma-repeat in my head.
I heard an interview where the person said, “When you grow up in Japan you wind up speaking Japanese.” It’s true. You learn what you’re taught. The day after I was abducted, I had been scheduled to be part of a caravan from my home church where my father was the preacher, to a neighboring state so we could protest something. I can’t remember if it was to protest loving someone of the same sex or loving someone of a different race. All that hate has blended together over the intervening two years.
I never truly believed that screaming epithets at people was right. Sadly, I also never questioned all the hate my father spewed in the name of the Lord.
I know it’s part of my bedroom problems—all the hate and the beliefs that were crammed into my brain before I was old enough to speak. They drilled into me that interracial marriage was wrong. How am I supposed to feel truly okay about loving a male with the most beautiful silver skin I’ve ever seen?
He’s leaning over me, his chin resting comfortably on my head, his arms wrapped protectively around my waist. I may be conflicted about my feelings, but they’re as real as the metal beneath my feet. I love this male with all my heart.
I want things to change. I want, with all my being, to have a complete relationship with my mate.
For the first time in my life, I know what the word thunderstruck means. I feel as if planet Fairea’s axis shifts beneath my feet. I hold on more tightly to Steele’s forearms because I feel a maelstrom buffeting inside my body and my mind.
I want to change! I want it so badly I can taste it.
Despite how messed up my childhood was, I certainly know how to pray. I close my eyes and pray as hard as I can for God’s mercy and help to transform.
With or without God’s help, I’m going to do what I can to become the person I want to be, the person Steele deserves.
I’m going to slap a smile on my face and I’m going to talk to everyone on Sanctuary. I’m going to do what I read once on a Facebook meme—fake it ‘til I make it. I’m going to pretend I’m okay inside. I’m going to act as if I’m comfortable with all these people. I’m going to try my hardest to have fun, even though I was taught that playing cards and singing and dancing weren’t allowed. Even though they told me certain types of fun were the devil’s work. Even though they taught me to fear, no, to despise strangers.
I’m going to make friends even if it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
“You ready, Zoey?” Maddie asks after she catches my eye. She’s our resident chef, and she’s over the moon about being able to cook for so many different people while we’re here. She’s especially excited about the big feast we’ve planned for Blessed Peace Day.
I’ve never really found my place on the Fool’s Errand . After the males fought for our freedom, Callista took over comms, Savannah helped in the engine room, and Dahlia taught Steele how to read. I’ve just been assisting here and there, never feeling I had a lot to contribute. I help Maddie in the kitchen every day, though.
Blessed Peace Day is going to be a huge celebration where we try to incorporate bits and pieces of everyone’s holiday traditions. The feast will be a thanksgiving, and goodness knows, we have a lot to be thankful for. Most of us were abducted, all of us were slaves. We’re all free and we have each other—a found family.
Some of the decorations are going to be from Christmas, some from Chanukah. The males have been planning some of their own contributions. I’m not going to judge that they’re not doing it “right.” There is no “right,” because I don’t know how Blessed Peace Day should be. I can just enjoy being with friends.
“I’m ready, Maddie. Just let me know when you want my help in the kitchen.”
“Naomi runs a lot of the day-to-day events at Sanctuary, and she told me not to worry about helping for the first few days. She says they’ve been preparing for a week and want us to have some time off. I’ll let you know when I need you. In the meantime, have fun!”
The ramp thuds onto the Fairean soil, and we move forward and spill out, greeting everyone who came to welcome us.
Steele knows me so well. He stays close, always keeping a physical connection—either holding hands or snugging his arm around my waist. I just vowed to behave differently, so I press into the loud, happy fray and say hello to everyone I met when we were here last.
My eye is drawn to Willa. She’s pregnant with Bayne’s baby and she’s showing. Maybe I’ll work up enough nerve to ask to put my palm on her belly. It’s a shifter baby, a canine-human hybrid. I should feel repulsed, but deep down, I’m envious.
Everyone else from the ship is staying in the compound instead of sleeping in our cabins on the ship. I’d begged Steele to stay on the Fool . It seemed scary and daunting to be in new quarters surrounded by so many people I barely know. But now I’ve changed my mind.
They’re all being housed in either the enormous mansion where the women and most of the couples are housed, or the dormitory where the single males live.
“Steele,” I raise on my tiptoes to whisper in his ear. “I’ve changed my mind. Would it be okay if we get a room on land instead of staying on the Fool ?”
His brow furrows in question. “Are you sure, Zoey? You’ll feel safe here?”
“Yes.” I nod. “I don’t want to miss out on any of the fun.” Even to my own ears that sounded like a giant fib, but I give him my most sincere look and he blasts me with his handsome smile.
We freed all the people on Sanctuary when we came here to kill the male who at one point in time owned us all—Daneur Khour. Naomi took on a leadership role, as did Dhoom, one of the eight gladiators who Khour had imprisoned in an underground dungeon in the middle of the property.
When Steele asks Naomi if we can stay in the compound instead of the Fool , she looks concerned and says, “We don’t have a room available in the dorm or the mansion, but there’s a little cottage near the barn. Frankly, I think it’s adorable, but you’ll be a few steps from all the action.”
“Perfect,” I say, plastering a smile on my face. I don’t have to look at Steele’s face to see he’s looking at me with a giant question on his face. I’m acting in a decidedly un-Zoey-like way. Good. That’s my goal.
“We’ve done a lot since you guys left us in charge here. We’ve bought livestock, cleared fields, and planted crops. We’ve cleaned and done some renovations, but your little cottage hasn’t gotten the full reno yet. It’s not terrible, but Fairea isn’t without its share of bugs. Let me ask Juno and Abraxx to help you sweep and air it out. They’re your neighbors in the cottage nearby.”
Ten minutes later, we’re re-introduced to the two who are now a mated couple. I met Abraxx when we liberated him from that horrid dungeon. He had to be helped up the stairs—all the males did. They were emaciated and abused.
He looks great now—and so in love with his mate, who he met at the fair.
Planet Fairea has an enormous Renaissance Festival about an hour away by hover. It covers many square miles and is a destination for people from across the galaxy. I’m hoping to visit during our vacation. It’s impossible to see everything in a day, so maybe we can even go more than once.
As Juno and I clean the counters and re-wash the few dishes in the tiny kitchen, the males sweep and vacuum.
“It’s nice to meet you, Zoey. I’ve only been here since Abraxx rescued me a few months ago. My job as a slave was to dance to bring crowds into my owner’s booth at the fair. Even though Abraxx offered to buy me, I feared I’d never be free because my owner put an astronomical price on my head. So I begged Abraxx to break my ankle.”
When she sees my eyes widen in surprise, she explains, “It made me useless to my owner. Worthless. That way, Abraxx could afford to buy me. He brought me here and freed me. He’s the best male in the galaxy. I love him with all my heart. The sygnet on the bottom of his largest brill ? That’s like a wedding ring for his species. It proclaims our mating.”
I assume his brill are the thick ropes of flesh he has instead of hair. They make him look very alien, although he has humanoid facial features. There’s a beautiful piece of jewelry made of interlocking bands of gold that rings one of his brill . And despite his alien appearance, two things are clear—he’s handsome, and he treats Juno like she studded the sky with stars. It’s also clear the feeling is mutual.
I’m in awe of Juno’s bravery. It must have been an agonizing choice for a dancer to ask someone to break her leg. But look at them now, the love radiating off them would be obvious from miles away.
“I guess I’m preaching to the choir when I talk about loving my male, though,” Juno says, “I hear you and Steele are mated. It’s obvious how much you love each other. He can’t keep his hands—or his gaze—off you. Lucky girl.”
Her smile is easy and genuine.
“Yes,” I say.
“Abraxx and I live in the cottage you passed on the way here. We’re a bit closer to the center of the compound. We’re so happy living here, but we’re glad to have a little more privacy than if we lived in the mansion. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask. And don’t worry if you hear me screaming. I assure you, there’s absolutely nothing wrong.” She gives me a lecherous wink, then giggles.
A hot jolt of jealousy slices through me and cuts me to the quick. Beautiful Juno has obviously never had to struggle to enjoy her handsome mate in their marital bed.
We thank Abraxx and Juno for their help cleaning and are on our way to the Fool to collect some clothes when the pirate ship touches down.
The first time I met the pirates, when they rescued and returned one of our gladiators, they scared me to death. I guess I’ve seen too many pirate movies. But Captain Thantose has a wicked sense of humor, and all the males couldn’t have been nicer to us.
The males and females on the ship hurry down their gangway and a hugfest begins. Four of the pirates have human mates, and all the women are hugging each other. KJ and Slag, or A’zul, as he’s called now, had a baby. My arms ache to hold him. I just stand back and watch, though. I’ll catch KJ when there are fewer people around and see if I can hold little Bran’Zen.
The males slap each other on the back. I don’t know what other alien males are like since I’ve only met gladiators and pirates, but they all seem to love to laugh and taunt each other in jest.
I glance at Steele from where we’re standing at the far edge of the activity and see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows. It strikes me that he wants to join his friends, wants to tease and joke with the guys.
We’ve been together two years, and this is the first time it hits me that he’s missed so much by being with me. He’s my mate. I can count on his boundless love. He’ll stand with me at the periphery of the action all day long as he holds my hand and protects me with his presence from the crippling shyness and anxiety that overwhelm me when he isn’t there.
Guilt stabs through me as I realize how much he’s sacrificed to be with me. He’s so staunch, so dependable, so supportive. But my neediness is hurting him.
“Let’s go say hello,” I say, my heart hammering. Licking my trembling lips, I pull him into the bustling crowd.
I’m swept into a bunch of girl hugs, one of which is especially awkward because Allura, the newest member of the Ataraxia crew, has four opalescent arms, all of which are squeezing me tight.
The crowd moves en masse to the dining room, and we put pre-made sandwiches and salads out, then tuck in as good-natured jibes and compliments are thrown faster than I can follow.
Although my heart is still beating way too fast and my palms are clammy from anxiety, I mentally pat myself on the back. I’m handling this. If I needed any additional incentive for changing my behavior, one look at Steele is all I need.
There are laugh lines at the edges of his eyes as he happily banters and jokes with everyone. This causes me to renew my vow to change my behavior starting today.
Steele leans in. His hand around my waist hitches me even closer. “My Zoey’s so brave today.” He presses a soft kiss to my cheek, then jokes with one of the males across the table.
I must be doing something right. My mate noticed how hard I’m trying.
Dhoom, the male who has taken on a leadership role in Sanctuary, stands and announces, “Welcome to Sanctuary. We’re glad you’ve joined us to celebrate the holiday. We wouldn’t be here without you gladiators who freed us and helped us forge the papers of ownership for the compound. Thanks also to you pirates who saved Thran and Melodie’s lives not long ago.
“We’ve planned five days crammed with festivities, starting with an obstacle course in the arena near the river. We’ve been busy repairing the buildings here on our compound and becoming self-sufficient with our crops and animals. We haven’t begun working on the crumbling arena, but with your help, we’re going to have fun there tomorrow.
“I propose we let the ladies take a quick tour of the fair while we males clean the arena and prepare for some friendly competition tomorrow. Don’t worry, there will be time for other trips to the fair. I’m certain you all want to get something special for your friends and loved ones. Blessed Peace Day is quickly approaching.”
Panic hits me hard and fast as tightness squeezes my belly, then flies to all my limbs. Just the thought of leaving Steele makes me gasp and slam my eyes closed.
I force myself to take slow, deep breaths and open my eyes. I’m not the old Zoey. I may be a work in progress, but progress is the operative word. Although I’m not comfortable with all these women, I know they all like me.
“Don’t worry, Zoey,” Steele whispers, “I’ll stay with you. We can hang out in our new cabin—”
“I won’t hear of it,” I say, surprising myself with how bold my voice sounds. “You have fun with your buds in the arena. I’ll be fine with all my friends.”
It’s sad that my words, which would sound so normal coming out of anyone else’s mouth, seem to surprise my mate. His gorgeous blue eyes pop open and his head tips back.
“It’s no problem, my love. I’ll stay here with you.”
“How am I supposed to get you a surprise if we’re connected at the hip?” I ask, as if going our separate ways is the most natural thing in the world.