Page 15 of Fusion (Gravity #2)

Dash

Eggs, check. I placed those on the counter. Bacon, check, check. That unopened package landed beside the eggs. Biscuits, butter, and milk followed, though more gently. I shut the refrigerator door only to tug it open again. Beau liked shredded cheddar cheese on his eggs. That bag slid next to the bacon.

Staring at the bounty, I realized two things: First, it had been years since I’d been to the grocery store, and second, I hadn’t had a home-cooked meal in about that same time. Huh . I surveyed the items and decided to start with the bacon. Beau’s favorite artery-clogging meat. After that, I’d tackle the biscuits, scramble the eggs, then make the pepper country gravy from scratch. Beau had introduced me to the delights of well-made biscuits and gravy.

I tightened the belt to my robe and swiped my freshly filled coffee mug from the base of the Keurig. My quest was to make my guy breakfast in bed. With the press of the bake button, I set the oven to preheat and readied the skillet for the bacon.

So far, so good until I got twisted up searching for the sheet pans. I opened and closed all the cabinet doors and drawers, pulling out all the cookware I thought I needed, and found the pan in the last cabinet. Why did anyone need so much storage space?

My cell phone buzzed and vibrated on the counter. It couldn’t be much earlier than six in the morning, but phone etiquette was tossed out the window since working directly for Lon. I glanced at the screen, set the coffee cup on the counter, and answered the phone while adjusting the heat for the bacon.

“Good morning.”

“Hey, Dash,” Penny said. Lon’s pretty, smart as a whip assistant sounded ready to tackle the day this Sunday morning. Lon and Penny had worked side-by-side for more years than I knew. She technically worked for me as well, but what did you call an assistant who regularly had the answers before you knew to ask the question? I’d learned a lot from her as well.

“Hey,” I said, wedging the cell between my shoulder and chin while popping open the biscuit container and arranging the dough on the sheet pan.

“Lon’s curious if you genuinely intend to take the day off, and if so, are you prepared for court tomorrow morning?” she asked, referencing the case Lon dumped on me last week.

“Yes to both questions. If Beau has plans for today, you might catch me for a couple of hours this afternoon.”

“Lon wants me to emphasize that this is your vacation for this year.”

I chuckled, fully aware of his seriousness. “Got it.”

“This part’s from me: Taking off to be with your guy? I’m really proud of you,” she said. “He’s awfully patient with you.” I turned the bacon, appreciating her words and all her help with birthdays, anniversaries, and holiday gifts. She spoke Beau’s love language so well, making me look great during those events.

“Yeah. He needs some love and convincing to stay with me. I’m having to refresh my breakfast-making skills. I probably should’ve ordered in. I feel like I’m fucking this up.”

The laughter she gave was definitely humor at my expense. “Concentrate, I’ll let Lon know. Bye.”

I tossed the phone on the counter and flipped the bacon pieces sizzling in the pan. Once I felt confident that we were on the way to perfectly cooked bacon, I started cracking open the eggs. Beau liked them scrambled, or at least he used to. The whisking part of the eggs took a minute before I dumped them into another skillet.

“What’re you doing?” Beau asked huskily, startling the shit out of me at a crucial moment of keeping the eggs moving in the pan while flexing my ambidextrous skills to remove the bacon. Even with everything I had going, I managed to push the Keurig start button to begin Beau’s morning cup of coffee.

“I took the day off with the hope of spending it with you. My plan was to surprise you with breakfast in bed. But my culinary skills are rusty. We’ll see how it turns out,” I said, only then remembering the cheese. Dammit.

“Let me help. I’m in here all the time,” Beau said, giving a long jaw-cracking yawn. I didn’t deny his help. The biscuits weren’t even in the oven yet. He took care of that oversight first thing.

“This is your coffee.”

Beau reached around, placing a kiss on my cheek. “Is the milk out to make gravy?”

“Yes, but that might be a more significant challenge than I’m ready for.”

Beau’s mom had spent time with us years ago, teaching Beau and I how to make the homemade country gravy that Beau enjoyed. I hadn’t made it since.

“Let me.” Like a pro, he went through the steps, eyeing how much flour and milk to use rather than using any measuring device. I picked up my cup and leaned against the counter, sipping and watching Beau work. Of course, I noticed a difference in our relationship. Neither one of us depended on the other to get through the days. I attributed that to growth and maturity. But right now, I sensed our old bond sliding back in place.

I chided myself for not making more time for my guy since he was better than all the ice cream in the world. I smiled and sipped my coffee as I decided to take more ice cream breaks too. Ice cream on top of Beau’s sculpted body… Now, that was a treat that deserved all my attention. My gaze locked on his profile. With age and relationship time under our belts, Beau had grown more reserved, quieter. It took effort to extract his thoughts. He’d always been my toughest challenge.

“Do you have plans today?”

“No, not exactly. I had fishing in mind, but the weather isn’t great for it.” While he spoke, he continued stirring the gravy, never glancing at me. I wasn’t thrilled about that. “But we can go anywhere. I’m in.”

His enthusiasm bordered coma levels. “With as thrilled as you are, I must be lagging in my partner duties,” I said teasingly, taking another longer drink of my coffee and scooting closer to Beau.

“I’m barely awake and making the most delicious peppered country gravy you’ll ever eat in your life. Get the pepper grinder and keep grinding until I tell you to stop. Hurry, it’s beginning to thicken up.” Following his instruction, I felt like I added more pepper than there was gravy before Beau told me to stop. He removed the sauce from the heat and continued stirring. “I think the biscuits are done. Can you pull them out?”

We had switched roles. I’d been making breakfast for him. Now, he was preparing mine. I opened the oven door to see Beau’s sniffer was on point and pulled the sheet pan out. He held out a plate for me, and filled his own, right down to tearing the biscuits apart to top with a good helping of the pepper gravy.

“Where’re we eating?” Beau asked, grabbing the silverware then picking up his coffee cup.

“I thought we’d eat in bed, but how about by the window to watch the sunrise?”

“Perfect.” A few years ago, Beau purchased a small dinette and placed it by the large windows. I envisioned him sitting there for any meal eaten in the house. He placed his plate and coffee down and went back to the kitchen to pour two small orange juices.

For the first few minutes, we sat in awkward silence. Him staring at me through the bites, then vice versa until I finally said, “I need to treat you better.”

That declaration seemed to catch Beau’s full attention. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve failed at reminding you how much I care for you. How I want to know more about your work and your hobbies,” I explained, then dug into the biscuits and bacon, taking my first bite. It reminded me of southern living and better times.

“What makes you say that?” Beau asked between bites, dropping a pretty decent size of bacon into his mouth.

“You’re quiet,” I said, restating the obvious feeling of distance between us.

“I’ve been quiet lately. There’s not much to say that you don’t already know,” Beau said, distracted by eating. “Best reason to climb. I’m virtually alone. The meal’s excellent.”

When did being a loner become his thing? We ate the rest of our meal in silence. As the sun rose over the lake, it drew Beau’s attention in that direction. He was such an outdoorsman. Nature fueled him in every way. I suspected the sunrise set his mood for the day.

The constant calculations and arguments that occupied my mind were as foreign to him as relishing a sunrise was to me.

“I’m probably going for seconds,” Beau said, pushing his chair back and lifting his coffee mug to his lips. He lifted his brows and looked at me. I translated the look to a question about whether I wanted him to bring me more. I shook my head no.

A great feature of the home was how the window tinting increased with the brightness of the sun. I’d always appreciated how that kept our energy costs down.

When Beau remained seated, staring at me, I stood with my coffee cup in hand. I rounded the table to approach him, hoping like hell the chair was strong enough to hold us both. I sat on top of his thighs, catching him off guard.

“Hey now,” Beau teased, setting his coffee cup on the table before it spilled over. I wasn’t small in either stature or weight, but his arms wrapped easily around me as mine circled his neck.

“Your body’s changed. You’re leaner,” I said, less than six inches from his face. My coffee had cooled, but I sipped it anyway.

“My workouts are different these days,” he said, staring out the window at the lake.

“You know nothing’s changed for me. The number of hours I work are so I can climb the partnership ladder faster,” I explained. I’d said those words so many times before. His captivating amber gaze landed on mine.

“I’m sorry I’m so basic. I don’t fit well in your work life, but I try.” He leaned in to kiss the side of my neck, just below my jaw.

“You fit anywhere I’m at.” I told the lie as evenly as I could. “Lon likes you.”

Beau nodded, but I didn’t get the sense that he believed me completely, then he turned back to the lake, saying nothing more.

I continued staring at him and his perfect profile. Beau and I were still somewhat young men, regardless of my responsibilities. I felt our bond, but it needed to be nurtured. I ran my fingers through his shaggy hair, wishing he and I were back to where we started. The guy that drew me to him with just the sparkle in his eyes. I kissed his cheek. “I wish I knew what you were thinking. I’m afraid you’re hiding from me, and I’m lost to your pretty face so I can’t figure it out.”

His serious gaze shifted back to me, telling me I’d finally cracked his facade. “You have to know that I spend a lot of time alone. I try to be supportive and understanding. But you’ve become something I don’t get. I try but can’t figure you out.”

“We have drinks and dinner a couple of times a week,” I said, not truly answering his statements.

“With whatever client you’re trying to woo or show appreciation to,” Beau answered. “I get what you’re doing. Truly. Other couples go in different directions too. We’re maturing. I’m good. I probably need more sex; we can work that out.” Beau tightened his hold around me and kissed my lips with a quick peck. “I’ll keep working on how to fit in better. Something’s got to stick.”

I had immediate remorse for the pain in his voice. I furrowed my brows and placed my head on his shoulder.

Through my niece, Joy, I knew my father was following my career. I loved getting under his skin. Now, I was handling all Carter’s overflow from his legal department. My father had eyes, or spies, everywhere, and had to be trying to find my weaknesses.

“Hang on for a little longer. I’ll do better by you.”

Beau laughed at my sincerity. His strong arms tightened around my waist.

“Seriously, stop,” Beau said, grinning cheekily, pressing a kiss on my lips again. “What’re we doing today?”

I perked right up. “Wanna get a haircut?”

“I feel like they’re bad luck,” Beau said, causing me to laugh with him. “I’m serious. It’s the truth.”

When I didn’t stop with the humor, his hold and hands threatened to dump me onto the floor. In a quick grab, I tightened my arms around his neck. If I was going down, so was he. Then he did something more surprising. He scooped me up in his arms and started for the stairs. I had no idea he could carry me this way, and if he didn’t tire out before the top step, I felt sure he’d be dominating me in the sack in a short time.

“I’m not sure Avatar lived up to the hype,” Beau remarked as the credits rolled. He reached over for another handful of popcorn, tossing several pieces into his mouth. I patted the top of the blanket I’d used to stay cozy warm, looking for the remote. As far as I was concerned, with my head resting half on a pillow and half on Beau’s thigh, his fingers brushing through my hair, I could lie here forever.

“I can’t find the remote.” I started to rise when Beau slid his hand between me and the couch then handed me the remote. “More pizza?” I asked.

“Yeah, sure.” While I was dislodged from my comfy spot, I reached for the pizza box on top of the coffee table, picking up a thin slice of pepperoni pizza.

“That might be the longest movie I’ve ever seen,” I said, just as I heard the faint sound of a ringtone. I reached for my phone at the same time Beau bumped my head up, taking his phone from his back pocket. It turned out it was his phone ringing. “It’s my mom. She video-calls every Sunday evening.”

That jackknifed me straight up, and I immediately tossed the pizza back on the box and pushed my hair back into place. I wasn’t sure that I knew she called every Sunday since she texted both of us all the time.

“Hey, Mom,” Beau said to the video call. Kailey, Beau’s baby sister, played with a toy in his mom’s lap.

“Hi, babe. Kailey, say hi to Beau. Is that Dash there with you?”

“Hi, Linda,” I chimed in, but Kailey held my full attention. I waved, giving her my brightest smile. Every time I saw the almost one year old, she looked more like Beau to me and seemed to grow inches between visits.

“Hi, Dash. Are you off tonight?”

“I took the day off. We just finished watching Avatar ,” I replied as Kailey’s nanny came into the frame and lifted Kailey into her arms.

“I’ll be up in a few minutes,” Linda said to the nanny. “Don’t start her bath until I’m there.” Words I’d never heard my mom say to my nannies.

His mom’s transformation was truly remarkable. Her chestnut hair was elegantly swept up. She looked as youthful as Beau and effortlessly beautiful, happy, and content. I envied those feelings. My parents, particularly my father, still had a strong hold on me. I wanted him to regret what he’d done to us. A focus on vendetta was taking over that place inside me where my reasonableness used to reside. And my guy was in sync with everything about his family. Well, except Carter himself, who Beau obviously hadn’t accepted.

“Dash, Wesley asked you to call him in the morning, early. He’s sorry he missed your call last night,” she said. “I was going to text you. He and I just hung up the phone.”

Beau turned to look at me—more like a glare—but I didn’t look at him to know for sure. That silent stare spoke volumes, asking when I’d had time to call Carter while I was with Beau last night. And ultimately what he wanted to know was why I was calling Carter at all.

“How’s Kailey doing? She seems to grow every time I see her,” I asked, trying to steer the conversation in any other direction at least for now.

“She’s good. Beginning to walk. Wesley’s upset he’s missing her first steps,” Linda said. I, of course, grinned broadly, but Beau stayed awkwardly silent and stone-faced. “When she can’t stand on her own, she gets angry. Has Beau shown you the videos?”

Well, no he hadn’t but that was where Linda shined. She included Beau in everything, making sure he felt secure in their new family.

“Kailey’s gonna be a handful,” Beau said proudly.

“Honey,” his mom hedged, trying to form her words. “The reason why Wesley’s trying to get ahold of Dash is that he wants us to designate you as Kailey’s guardian if something happens to us.”

“Mom, nothing’s going to happen to you,” Beau interjected as if that was the dumbest thing he’d ever heard.

“No, Beau, this is important to us,” Linda said. “Wesley has a big extended family, so these decisions have to be made and documented. Wesley has named Dash as his executor to the trust we have for both you and Kailey.”

Beau swiveled his head in my direction again. This time there was no denying his accusatory expression. My explanation of attorney/client privilege wasn’t going to go over as well as I’d hoped it might.

“Dash named executor?” Beau asked. “He probably should have told me before making that commitment.”

“I felt it was better to let the information ride until you found out,” I whispered. “I know how you feel about him.”

“I don’t feel anything about him,” Beau scoffed, dismissing the claim.

“Save such a lie. We three know that’s untrue,” Linda said. “Son, I’m safe and secure, as is Kailey. Wesley’s a wonderful husband and great father. I’m truly very happy. Wesley feels the same way I do. We love each other.”

Beau stared at the screen, his face morphing into a passive expression.

“He’s no longer pouting,” I said to her when he didn’t speak. She and I both knew Beau wasn’t pondering her words. Instead, he turned his dislike into himself, handling it privately.

“Go give Kailey a bath,” he finally said. “Dash took the day off to spend time together.”

“Shocking,” his mom teased. Her raised eyebrows spoke even louder than the words as she looked at me.

“Hey now, I was just on your side, and I like Carter,” I said teasingly. “Stay mad at Beau, not me.”

“I’m not mad at Beau. He’s got to work through his issues with Wesley on his own timetable. But you and Beau rarely see each other anymore,” she said. Her sweet smile and motherly concern almost made up for throwing me under the bus. “And that’s your deal. None of my business.” She lifted a hand and waved. “I love you both. I’m going. Beau, call me tomorrow.”

“Bye, Mom,” Beau said, certainly eager to end the call. My guy. He rarely gave an inch, and that only came when dealing with his mother. Carter didn’t ever stand a chance with Beau. His decision was made and set in stone.

“Bye, Linda,” I said and waved.

Her warm smile vanished when the screen turned dark.

“Beau, I don’t want this to sound wrong,” I started, turning to better face him.

“Then don’t say it.” Beau’s hand slashed between us, cutting me off. “My feelings about Carter are mine, not yours to share. So get off me about it.”

“We’re buying this house from him at a very reduced price—”

“I’m only in a place like this because of you. I’m not this kind of guy.” He stood up and straightened our mess on the coffee table. “How about we go for a walk before it gets too late?”

My guy was a seriously hardheaded man. I followed Beau as he carried the remaining pizza and popcorn into the kitchen. “Babe, you’re not seeing the bigger picture. We can sell this place for three times more than we’ll pay. It’s a great investment.”

“Leave it alone,” Beau said, and dismissed me. He left the room with his hands full of our snacks and glasses.

My heart did a flipflop in my chest. I was a successful attorney, winning cases for a living, but whenever I was with my mister, I eventually reverted to the young man who hung onto every word he said, desperately hoping for a smile or caress along the way.

I wasn’t sure which version of me I liked better, the younger man with ideals and dreams, or the new me who no longer wore rose-colored glasses. My life was spent calculating and arguing for a living. I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, rising to follow Beau. The truth hit me like a ton of bricks, halting me in my tracks. I had new goals for the rest of my life, I wanted to be a man whose reputation instilled fear in his opponents. In order to do that, the rest of my life needed to mature, including my relationship with Beau.

With a spine built with steel, I was determined to be that man. I no longer planned to dress Beau up and pray for the best. My love needed to fill his life with the things he found interesting, and then be waiting here at home for my return.