Page 28 of Forsaken (The Nightwolf Pack #3)

CHAPTER 28

S erafina

A flash of red-hot heat stirs me awake. Though it’s completely dark in the bedroom, I know exactly where I am.

I don’t need to see him to know that it’s Ronan who sleeps on my left side, closest to the door. Montgomery is to my right, and Noah has alternated between sleeping on either the other side of Montgomery or at the foot of the bed.

It takes a lot of work to disentangle myself from the mess of limbs. At some point, all three of them ask me where I’m going.

Montgomery even offers to carry me to the bathroom.

After the romp in Noah’s office and Ronan watching, all three of us came home and spent at least a few hours in the bedroom. Montgomery, of course, freaked out because, yes I had worked up an appetite.

A smile touches my lips as I think about how crazy he gets when he thinks I’m hungry or tired or thirsty, or in need of anything.

He’s the one who carried me to the bath, insisting I soak in there for at least thirty minutes while he brought me homemade sugar cookies—my favorite.

Leaning down, I press a kiss to Montgomery’s lips just because. He groans, his lips searching out more. I cover my mouth to keep myself from laughing out loud.

“I’m just going to the bathroom,” I tell him when he latches his arms around me.

He reluctantly releases me, allowing me to get up.

I move swiftly to make it out of the ridiculously huge bed.

I head to the bathroom and do my business before heading to the kitchen to get some water to take care of the cotton stickiness in my throat.

While in the kitchen, though, instead of a bottle of water, I grab a couple of lemon ginger tea bags from the cabinet and pour some water in a large mug. I start to reach for the microwave to warm the tea up but stop.

A quick glance over my shoulder tells me there’s no one behind me. I likely would’ve scented or heard one of my mates enter, but a part of me is feeling extra anxious over what I’m about to do.

On an inhale, I take the mug into both of my hands, holding it there as I stare down into the water. I start to count down from ten to one.

By the time I reach five, the mug and the water inside are hot. Not tepid, or merely warm. Though the water isn’t scalding hot, it’s heated enough that steam rises from the mug. Yet, the mug doesn’t burn my hands.

“What the hell?” I whisper.

I’ve always run rather warm, body wise. My aunt used to just say I was lucky. That so many women tended to run cold, and it was great that I didn’t need so many extra layers during winter months.

But running hot and being able to freaking heat up a mug of tea until it’s nearly boiling are two different things.

I shake my head, wondering what this means.

Confusion wars within me and I decide that I need fresh air. I don’t want to go back to the room with all three of my mates sleeping peacefully. Not when my mind feels so restless.

Leaving the mug on the counter, I move to the door.

I’m surprised when the sliding glass door easily opens. No alarm or anything goes off. As I slide the door closed behind me, I almost kick something over that’s sitting on the back porch.

I gasp when I see it’s my bow and my pack of arrows next to it. I lift the bow and run my hand along the limb. The wood is shiny and smooth, almost as if it’s been refurbished. The worn grip remains the same, however. My fingers fit comfortably into grooves I long ago established.

Next, I turn to the arrows, and yup, they’re my original silver arrows.

I pivot to look over my shoulder at the back of the house. They returned my bow and arrows again. Next to the bow is a note. I pick it up to unfold it.

Just don’t use these in the house.

Or on anyone of us!

Be safe, baby.

A laugh pushes through my lips when I recognize Ronan’s handwriting as the first line, Noah’s as the second, and Montgomery’s as the third.

They’ve returned my bow and arrow.

Memories of Aunt Wilma first showing me how to handle the bow and arrow push through my mind’s memory. A smile creases my lips.

My heart tightens with the ever-present pain of missing her.

Between memories of my aunt, the bow in my hands, and recalling how earlier Noah returned my cell phone, tears start to blur my vision.

This thing between Ronan, Montgomery, Noah, and me has gotten deeper than I could have ever imagined. They’ve all managed to reach a place deep inside of me that I believed was inaccessible.

After wiping away the unshed tears, I place my bow down before stepping off of the back porch. The thought of fleeing or escaping doesn’t even cross my mind.

The mere thought of leaving the three of them causes pain akin to what I imagine a silver arrow ripping through my heart would feel like. Even worse than when Ronan and Noah pushed me away the first time.

“What do I do now?” I whisper into the night air.

But what if…

What if it’s true that I’m a threat to them? I don’t even know what the hell I am. Not completely a wolf. But obviously not completely a human either.

In my head, I run through what I know about me. I’m not the daughter of the people who I initially believed were my parents. Though I was told I shifted, I have no conscious memory of ever shifting.

But lately things have felt different …

As if there’s a shift happening inside of me. A growing inner voice and strength that wasn’t always present.

“Serafina?”

I peer over my shoulder to find a naked Ronan standing in the doorway. The men aren’t shy about their bodies. Most shifters aren’t. And if I hadn’t grown up around shifters my entire life, it might freak me out to see how comfortable they are with their nudity.

Even if I’m not one of them, I can appreciate growing up among shifters. Comfortable with nudity or not, I can’t help but admire Ronan’s taut muscles and tall stature.

A glow passes through his eyes. I silently watch as he moves closer.

“It’s cold out here,” he says, moving closer until he steps off the porch as well, coming to wrap his arms around me. “You’re so warm,” he says, nuzzling his head into the crook of my neck.

“I haven’t been out here long,” I tell him by way of explanation.

Ronan pulls back to look down at me.

“Thank you for my bow and arrow.” I thrust my head in the direction of the bow.

He frowns. “You know you’re safe here, don’t you? With us. No one will touch you.”

I swallow and look away but still answer, “I know that.”

He squeezes my shoulders. “Still, the bow and arrow are yours. Given to you by your aunt.” Obviously, Noah told him about our earlier conversation.

“Besides,” he starts, “I know you’re not going anywhere.”

I raise an eyebrow, and he smirks cockily.

“What’s the point when you know we’ll just hunt you down?” He shrugs, and I actually laugh.

“I’m sure my phone you gave back has a tracker in it or something,” I reply.

His smile widens, letting me know I’ve hit the nail on the head.

“I put the tracker in place after searching your contact for the … guy you screwed.”

I snicker. He’s still smarting off of the fact that I wasn’t a virgin before the first time we had sex.

“Did you find anything there?”

He snorts. “You know I didn’t.”

Because the one man I’ve had sex with wasn’t anything serious enough for me to save in my contacts.

Yet, I can’t let Ronan know that. I like the fact that he’s jealous.

“Who said it was just one guy, anyway?”

Maybe that wasn’t the right thing to say. Because his eyes immediately glow, and all of a sudden his hand is around my throat.

My nipples harden and my pussy immediately weeps.

“I know you’re just saying that to piss me off. You should know, it’s working,” he warns. “Will you wear such a pretty little smile on that beautiful face of yours once I get my hands on him?”

“You don’t even know who he is.”

“I can find out. Don’t test me.”

I roll my eyes and do my best to pretend like I’m not turned on. But Ronan raises his nose and sniffs the air.

“You get off on seeing me like this.”

Damn wolf senses.

“You know I do,” I reply, knowing there’s no use in lying about it. He can scent it.

He pulls me in by the throat, kissing me in a way that leaves no question of his possessiveness.

“What in Mother Moon am I going to do with you?” he asks once he pulls back.

My lips spread.

“Besides that,” he says, making me laugh.

“What are you two doing?” I peek over Ronan’s shoulder to find a yawning Noah standing at the door. He’s thrown on a pair of gray sweatpants, much to my chagrin.

“Someone interrupted my alone time,” I say, smiling. “Did you come out here to further intrude?”

Noah chuckles and approaches us.

“Thank you for fixing up my box,” I tell him.

Noah’s eyebrows raise and he peers over his shoulder at the box still sitting on the porch. I don’t need anyone to tell me for me to know who it was that fixed up my bow.

“And for leaving the grip,” I add.

When he faces me again, the half grin on his face warms my heart. I lift on my tiptoes and place a kiss to his jaw, the hairs of his stubble tickling my lips.

“Do you really want to be alone, Little Hellraiser?” he asks in a deep, rough voice.

My nipples tighten, but I take a step back, grinning. “Maybe.”

He cocks his head to the side. “Liar.”

I move away from both of them, onto the stone walkway that leads out into a trail into the forest.

“That wasn’t nice.” I raise my hands over my arms, stretching. I spin to face the dark forest with my arms still raised. Two pairs of male growls sound behind me. I know it’s because with my arms high, Montgomery’s T-shirt lifts above my ass.

“What’s it like?” I turn back to them and ask.

The growling ceases as I’m confronted with two confused, yet gorgeous men, their intense gazes on me.

“To live with a wolf inside of you? To shift at will. What’s it like?”

They look toward one another.

“I’ve lived among shifters my whole life. But, for the most part, I’ve only been an observer. An outsider.”

I pause before asking, “What does it feel like to be two beings in one?”

“The best and worst gift all at once.”

I raise my gaze to find Montgomery leaning against the doorframe. Ronan and Noah turn to face him as well.

Montgomery stares down at this chest, running a hand over the half wolf, half human tattoo.

“Why?” I ask.

He comes closer to me.

“He can be my best friend. A constant companion. A protector when I need it. His instincts are so much more attuned than my human side. He can see and know what I couldn’t put into words or analyze with my human mind.”

“Yet?” I ask, listening to what Montgomery says, but also to what he hasn’t said.

“And yet, if he’s not controlled, he’s the biggest threat to us. He’s still a wild animal that needs to be controlled and tamed at times. And if he’s not, all hell will break loose.”

Montgomery looks me in the eyes. “There were times he was at his worst when I thought it would be better if we were both dead. But he somehow managed to keep me alive. I think …”

He pauses and shakes his head.

“I know he did it because he knew one day we would find you.”

I inhale deeply, his words hitting me square in the chest.

Montgomery’s eyes widen and he looks back at his brothers. “Did you see that?”

Ronan and Noah are now both staring at me. And not in the sexy way that has me wanting to rip off this T-shirt.

“What?”

Ronan blinks. “You didn’t feel that?”

“Feel what?”

“Your eyes,” Noah says. “They …”

“They, what? Glowed?” I ask, laughing.

“No,” Montgomery answers, seriously. “But they did light up.”

“Isn’t that the same thing?” I wave my hands in front of me. “Which is impossible because my eyes don’t glow.”

You’re a danger to anything you come in contact with!

I tighten my hands into fists, hating that that memory has to pop up right now. It’s been weeks since I’ve had that dream but here it is again.

“Stop being weird. It was probably just a light from the forest or something.”

I take a step away from them. “Anyway … show me your wolves,” I say, folding my arms across my chest.

They go silent.

I hate the uneasy feeling that moves through me. It’s as if they’re trying to figure me out. A feeling I’ve lived with for most of my life. The doubts on my decision not to tell them about the whole ability to warm water with my bare hands begins to war inside of me.

“Well?” I say, throwing my hands out to my sides. “Don’t just stand there. I’ve never seen your wolves up close, and since I can’t shift myself, yours are the closest things I get to the experience.”

Yes, I’ve lived with shifters my entire life, but after I failed to shift, I kept my distance from the pack members.

“You want to see our wolves,” Ronan says.

I nod even though he didn’t form it as a question.

He looks between his brothers. Within a few seconds, instead of the gorgeous and dangerously sexy man who stood before me, he transforms into a beautiful white wolf on four paws.

I’ve seen his wolf before but only in action or in threatening situations. Now, I get to inspect him up close. Kneeling down, I run my hand over his soft fur. It’s an illusion though. Because beneath the softness, lies immense power of the muscles beneath.

I scratch at his wolf’s belly, making him growl. While he’s baring his teeth and growling should look terrifying, I know it’s not an angry growl. Intuitively, I know it’s a mix of Ronan’s wolf and his human telling me they like my touch.

Soon enough, I’m surrounded by two more wolves. Both share the same white pelts that Ronan’s wolf has. But I can easily tell which one is Montgomery and which is Noah. For one, all three of them maintain their human eye coloring. It’s as if they’re looking at me from both their wolf and human perspective.

Additionally, Montgomery’s wolf is slightly smaller than his brothers. While still large and imposing from a human perspective, I can read the story of the years of survival he went through just by looking at his wolf. He also has patches of scars and missing fur on his belly and back. Further evidence of the struggles he went through while out in the wilderness alone. My heart aches thinking of him all alone in this world. No pack or brothers to rely on. Just himself.

I run my hands over his sides before nuzzling the top of his head with my nose. I press a kiss to his head, to which he whines and actually turns over onto his back, showing me his belly.

I laugh at the obvious sign of vulnerability. His wolf is telling me he’s all mine. To think, Montgomery once believed this is the wolf that would hurt me. He’s putty in my hands as I rub his belly.

A whine from my right catches my attention. It’s Noah’s wolf. His eyes are narrowed at Montgomery’s wolf. He yips at him, to which Montgomery barks back.

I’m not quite fluent in wolf speak, but I imagine Noah is telling Montgomery something like “man up” to which Montgomery’s wolf is telling him he’s jealous. The two nip at one another, but it’s not in a warring way.

They’re playing with one another.

Soon, Ronan intervenes to break it up and the two pounce on him. I laugh, clapping my hands while watching the sibling rivalry.

All of a sudden, Ronan’s wolf scents the air and then he looks over at me. His eyes narrow, causing a rippling feeling in my belly. He looks hungry.

His eyes start to glow. And like a lightning bolt I feel three pairs of glowing wolf’s eyes on me. The feeling is invigorating. Everything inside of me heats up. My muscles tense and feel primed for takeoff.

Even more than sexy and passionate, I feel powerful. As if I could conquer anything. I don’t know what this feeling is coursing through me, but I decide not to question it.

Instead, I eye all three of my mates in their wolf forms before turning and sprinting toward the woods. I don’t have a destination in mind. All I know is that something in the pit of my stomach wants … no, needs me to run.

More importantly, perhaps, it wants to be chased. By my mates.

And chase me, they do.

Behind me the echoes of Ronan’s howl beat at my back. A powerful rippling effect happens through my body. I don’t stop running though. If anything, I pick up speed. There’s no rhyme or reason to my running.

The dirt, rocks, twigs, and other natural debris of the forest don’t sting or hurt. The sensation of the Earth under my feet propels me forward. That and the sounds of all three of my mates pursuing me, licking at my heels.

I glance over my shoulder to see all three still following, running at almost full speed. Which means I must be running fast as hell. The question of just how fast I’m going occurs. I’ve always been decently fast but never wolf speed.

Yet, my three alpha mates look as if they’re having to use their supernatural speed to keep up with me.

I don’t think too much about it as I cut around another group of trees, coming to a winding trail. My lungs expand and take in all of the oxygen I need to keep me moving at this rate. The air rushes over me, and I glance up to spot the full moon high in the sky.

A sudden tingling starts at the tips of my fingers.

Before I realize what’s happening, it spreads up my arms, over the rest of my body. Soon, my feet are barely touching the ground, and my vision narrows but sharpens at the same time. Also, I don’t need to duck as much to avoid low hanging branches.

All of my senses become almost painfully heightened and … I’m running on four legs instead of two.

That awareness brings about an immediate jolt through my body. I slow down, almost skidding to a complete stop. My breathing is rapid and my heartbeat races while my tongue hangs out of my mouth. Like …

Like a wolf catching its breath.

I peer down to see the ground much closer than it normally is. More than that, I catch sight of paws.

Wolf paws.

“ What the hell just happened?”

I thought I asked the question in my human voice but all I hear are wolf yips. I peer up to find all three of my mates in their wolf forms staring back at me, wide-eyed.

Noah is the first to break the silence. He howls loud at the moon.

I can’t help it as I throw my head back and howl also. My wolf responding to her mate.

In an instant I’m weak and confused. My legs tremble until my body collapses to the ground from exhaustion.

All three of my mates surround me. Montgomery nudges me with his nose, soothing me with his touches. Within seconds all three of them shift back into their human form. I’m too confused by what’s happening to even attempt to change back to human.

Am I really a wolf right now?

The question floats through my head. Where did a wolf come from? Did I truly just shift?

Why do I feel so strange and disconnected from her if she’s supposed to be a part of me?

“She’s hot,” Ronan’s deep voice pierces my thoughts.

It takes another few seconds to realize he’s said this as he lifted me from the ground.

His body heat calls to me, even though I’m nowhere near cold.

“Too hot,” he says, worry sounding in his voice.

I try to tell him that the heat feels good. It’s comforting. There’s no pain and it’s soothing to the aching in my muscles. I crave more heat, in fact. But I can’t speak, not in this form. Even my attempt to yip or howl is thwarted by the overwhelming tiredness coursing through my veins.

Is shifting into a wolf this draining for them as well?

So many questions but they’re all locked inside of me. I’m too tired to try to communicate at this point.

I lay my head against Ronan’s bare chest and let him carry me. I can sense Montgomery and Noah beside us. They’re in their human forms. My wolf feels their wolves nearby, however, which soothes us in a way that I didn’t know I needed.

My eyes start to drift closed.

The last thing I recall hearing is Noah’s voice when he says, “Her paws left burn marks on the trails.”