Page 94 of For the First Time
Promises, promises.
The box opened with a fancy flourish, like even the container was meant to be displayed.I pulled out the glass container, which was obviously a bottle of perfume, the little squeeze-puff handle an older style.It was a round bottle, only about half an inch wide, and made of glass.Real glass.It didn’t have any words or labels on it, nothing to denote what was inside or even who had made it.
“You got me perfume?”I wasn’t sure how I felt about the gift.Mostly surprised.Atlas hated my perfumes.The only reason he’d let me bring them into the house was if I agreed that they’d stay in the box from my apartment—as if caging them in carboard would keep me from using them.
“It’s a special scent,” Everett said.
“We designed it ourselves,” Oaks added.
Despite it being a gift from my whole pack, Atlas’s nose wrinkled.“Personally, I don’t think you need a perfume.I like your natural scent.”
Everett growled, obviously disliking our mates’ words.
“But—” Atlas glared at Everett, “We all know that these court proceedings are going to be stressful for you.We figured, if you wanted to go back to using descenter and perfumes, you could use this.”
“It should smell like us,” Everett said.“Like pack.”
“We found a perfumer in the city and sent in swatches of our scents.”Oaks gave me a look at whatever he saw on my face.“Swatches from our sweat.Such a dirty girl with her mind in the gutter.”
I held the bottle carefully, my mind racing as I traced my fingers over it.Perfume that smelled like my pack.It was a mix of the old and new versions of myself.A part of me didn’t want it—or more truthfully, didn’t want to want it.But I did.As much as I’d wanted to say that I’d overcome the societal standards and expectations of being a beta, it wasn’t completely true.Sure, at home, when I was inexplicably happy and safe, it was easy to pretend designations didn’t exist.That my pack and I were just us.Four lovers.
That perfect picture would quickly crumple when I was in a court room, terrified about my unknown future while some lawyer tried to make me out to be an abuser.I knew myself well enough to know that the stress would have me back to wearing descenter and perfume, desperate to hide my own raging scent of uncontrollable emotions.Because as much as I broke free from the standards when I was home, when I left the ranch I went back to being a beta.Surrounded by alphas and omegas.Expected to act a certain way.
“Thank you.”I held the glass container tightly in my grip, worried it would suddenly fall from between my fingers.
This made the whole thing more real, and that was terrifying.
“Have you made a decision about Lilith?”Oaks asked.His words were careful, his tone soft.
“She says she’s going to do it,” Everett answered on my behalf.
“I think that’s a good call, darlin.You were born to be a protector.”
That made me laugh.“I’m a beta.Pretty sure protector is not in my blood.”
“Pretty sure you’re wrong, Babygirl.You’re the one that alters your scent to appease the other designations.You’re the one who spent years of your life helping omegas.You’re the one that stepped up to protect Hannah.What other betas do you know who do that?”
“You are more than your designation, darlin,” Oaks added, stepping closer to me until I was fully and completely surrounded by all three of my mates.“Everyone else might look at you and see a beta, but I’ve always thought of you more like an alpha.”
I choked on air.“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“No, no, I agree.”Atlas nodded, a look on his face like he was thinking through an intense problem.“Most alphas always claim that they’re the designation that best protects and provides for an omega, butyou’rethe one that cooks for me.That cleans the house and literally breaks the law for me.It’s all talk with them.But you.You actually act.You help.”
Everett agreed, “It’s more than I’ve ever done, Babygirl.That’s going to change now.We’re going to support you.Your alphas and your omega.We are going to support you.Our pack center.”
Tears burned behind my eyes.
It didn’t feel real.Their words.Their love for me.I was just a beta.I was supposed to be the member of the pack on the sidelines, providing and caring for the others, simply content to be included.Betas were taught not to expect bonding into a pack.And if we were, miraculously, bonded in, then we would be the oil in the machine.Not part of the production, just the help to ensure all the other parts continued to move equally.
My pack had been perfectly content before I came along.They were happy and bonded.Yet they’d still wanted me.They chose me and rather than letting me exist on the peripheral of their lives, they all turned to face me, reaching out to include me.
I wasn’t alone anymore.Hadn’t been for months.
My hand came up to trace the Wilder name around my throat.Not cling to it, just touch it.
For the first time, I truly felt like I belonged, like I was more than what society had told me I could be.I was Eve.Mate to Everett, Atlas, and Oaks.I just so happened to be a beta.
The End