Page 8 of First Dates and Birthday Cakes: MM Romantic Comedy

Jake was being weird.

He’d got back an hour ago from a work trip to Sheffield, having accompanied one of his skaters up there to a qualifying competition at the Olympic-sized rink. He’d dumped his bags at home and come to meet me at The Star for dinner, and it was a good job that I was already sitting at our table when he joined me, because otherwise the kiss he laid on me would have knocked me clean off my feet.

He pulled back and cupped my face, staring down into my wide eyes.

The world fell away—the latest top-forty hit playing over the speakers fuzzed out to white noise, the sound of people talking and laughing faded to a hum, and the cheerful pub around us blurred until the only thing in focus was Jake.

“Uh,” I said stupidly as I tried to remember how to breathe. “Hi. Hello. Glad to be home?”

“You have no idea.” His hungry gaze roamed over my face, as if he hadn’t seen me for a year.

I caught his wrists, frowning when I felt the rapid beat of his pulse under my fingertips. “Are you okay?”

He bent down and kissed me again. This one was short, fierce, and no less overwhelming. He pulled away, changed his mind and darted back in for one more, then collapsed into the chair opposite.

“I thought it was a good trip?” I said. His skater had qualified, and nothing made him happier than that. He didn’t seem happy. He seemed…off? No, not off. But not himself, either.

“It was a great trip. I just…I’m ready, Ben. I’m really, really ready.” His voice throbbed. “To be home.”

“Right.” I eyed him. His cheeks were flushed and he was staring at me. His dark eyes were heavy.

Oh.

I knew that look.

I shifted on my chair. “Do you…? Do you want to skip dinner and go home right now? We can always order pizza instead, if you?—”

“No.”

I straightened, somewhat taken aback by his vehemence. “Okaaay. Thai?”

“No, I mean…” He swallowed hard and rubbed his hands over his face. “Sorry. I’m a bit wound up.”

“Jake, are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes! I’m fine. I’m better than fine, I’m great.” He stretched a hand out across the table, reaching for me. I reached back, and he tangled our fingers together. “I’m excited to be here, that’s all.” He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed it.

Someone was really in the mood tonight.

Jake hid a smile against my hand. The light abrasion of his stubble over my skin sent a wave of goosebumps rippling down my arm.

My fingers tightened on his. “No to pizza and Thai. How about Chinese? We could?—”

“No,” he said. “We need to stick to the plan. Dinner here. And then, when I get you home…” He trailed off into a deliberate and meaningful silence, backed up with a serious smoulder.

I raised my brows. “Don’t stop there,” I said. “When you get me home, what? Can I expect something fun?”

He grinned and slouched lower in his seat. “Mm-hmm.”

“Any hints?”

“It’s a surprise,” he said, looking very pleased with himself.

“I hope you realise that you’re setting some pretty high expectations. If all I get after this is the same old Saturday night special, I’ll be disappointed.” I absolutely would not be disappointed. I loved his Saturday night special. I loved him and what he did to me any night of the week. Or day. I wasn’t fussy. “You’d better deliver.”

“Oh, I will, Ben. I will.”

Bizarrely enough, he sounded both threatening and nervous when he said it, which made a peculiar combination for Jake.

Had he been looking things up on the internet again, I wondered, and would I be able to walk tomorrow?

Not that I cared. Tomorrow was Sunday. I didn’t have to go anywhere. I could have a long lie in and insist he brought me breakfast in bed, just like I usually did.

His intensity eased somewhat as we ate, but he continued to give me little touches and hot looks all throughout the meal, with the result that by the time I was tucking into dessert, I was as wound up as he was.

I didn’t mess around with my apple crumble, packing it efficiently away under his intense focus. I’d nobly offered to forgo it for once so we could get home all the sooner, but he wasn’t a stupid man, and he didn’t take me up on it.

Nina, our earnest teenage server, bounced up with the card reader less than a second after I’d set my spoon down beside my empty bowl. While things were relaxed at The Star during the week, on a Saturday night tables were in demand, and she was ready to hustle us out the door and seat the next customers.

I opened my mouth to ask for the bill, and snapped it shut when Jake spoke first. “Two coffees, please, Nina.”

I don’t know who was more surprised, me or Nina.

“Sure, guys,” she said brightly. “Be right with you.” She gather up my empty bowl and trotted off to the kitchen.

“I take it I need the extra stimulant to get through whatever awaits me at home?” I said.

Jake’s smile was slow and filthy. “It can’t hurt.”

“You know I won’t sleep until after midnight if I drink coffee this late,” I warned him. “I don’t want to hear any complaints about fidgeting.”

“Ben.” He leaned forwards and touched my cheek. I managed not to nuzzle into his hand, but it was a close-run thing. “Trust me, you won’t be sleeping until at least three a.m., and it won’t be the coffee keeping you awake.”

My stomach plunged.

“Did you want decaf?” Nina said helpfully from beside my shoulder.

I cleared my throat. “No, thanks,” I said. “Just the usual.”

We sat and drank our coffee, Nina shooting us impatient looks every time she bustled past. For a moment, I thought that Jake was going to order another round but when I came back from the gents, our table was occupied by another couple and Nina was jotting down their order on her notepad.

I spotted Jake waiting by the exit and headed over.

One of the best things about living in a small town like Chipping Fairford was that everything was in walking distance. We’d bought a house together last year on the outskirts of town and it took longer to get home from the pub than it used to, but I was more than happy to wend my way through the soft twilight streets, holding hands and talking quietly.

Well.

UsuallyI was happy to do so.

Tonight, there was no wending.

Jake set a pace that was more power walk than evening stroll, and he gripped my hand so tightly as he dragged me along after him that I eventually had to ask him to ease up before he ground my bones to dust.

The heated looks that had been put on the back burner while we ate were once again up to a full boil, and I felt his attention on the side of my face the whole way. I started to blush. His eyes were hot and glittering in the dusk, glinting in the streetlights, and he was unashamedly staring.

In a carnal way.

Or in what I misinterpreted as a carnal way.

It was actually emotional and a little bit panicked, although I didn’t realise it right then, what with being all-in and fully onboard with the carnal situation.

We made it home in record time and I couldn’t wait any longer. As soon as we hit the doorstep, I turned and stretched up to kiss him.

“Mmm.” He smiled against my mouth.

Sliding a hand to the back of his neck, I pulled him closer. He staggered and bumped into me, squashing me against the door.

I kissed him deeper, rolling my hips into his and…rolling them into the air? Jake pulled away from the kiss with a very unsexy smacking sound, and unwound my arms from around his shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” I said, still staring at his mouth.

“Let’s take it inside.”

“Right. Yes.” I glanced around. There was no one out here to see us, but considering the way things tended to escalate once he got his tongue—or anything else—in my mouth, it was the smart move.

I opened the door after a couple of fumbling tries, very aware of his big body thrumming with tension behind me, of his heat sinking into me, and stumbled across the threshold.

I’d left the kitchen light on when we went out, but Jake must have closed the door when he dropped his bags off earlier, as the hall was dark. He pulled the front door shut, and I jumped him. I had my hands on his arse and my mouth on his the second he faced me.

He moaned quietly, returning the kiss with desperation, and then he pulled away again, easing me back.

I dropped flat to the floor and gazed up at him suspiciously. “What’s going on with you?” I said.

“Nothing.”

“You’re being weird tonight.”

“No, I’m not.”

“I mean, I’m fine with it. I don’t care. I like it weird. You know I like it weird.”

Jake laughed. Loudly and a little hysterically, his eyes flicking to the side.

“Ohhhh,” I said. “Is that what this is about?”

“No, I?—”

“You want it weird tonight, baby?”

Jake sucked in a breath, eyes going large.

“Yeah?” I said. I shimmied up to him and plastered myself against his front. “How weird are we talking? You want me to open my toy box and get out the?—”

He bent his head and kissed me hard, muffling the rest of my words.

I moaned into his mouth, making it nice and theatrical.

Jake liked to hear me make some noise. He got off on my enthusiasm, which was a good thing, as more often than not, he had me wailing.

I bit his bottom lip and dragged it between my teeth—slow, gentle, and filthy.

Releasing him, I said, “And since it’s your birthday next week, as a special treat, we can go as hard as you want this time. I won’t even mind if you want to try putting two of them, right up my?—”

He clapped a hand over my mouth.

I blinked up at him, startled.

Narrowing my eyes, I grasped his wrist and drew it slowly away. “Okay,” I said. “We can stick with one, that’s fine, we—oh my god.” The last bit was muffled, because he covered my mouth again.

I tossed my head and mmphed, but I couldn’t shake him off. He looked like he was trying not to laugh. I went still, and raised a brow.

Very slowly, he slipped his hand away.

I could read between the lines. “If you’re trying to tell me you want to gag me, then?—”

Oh, this was getting ridiculous.

Jake’s hand was back over my mouth, and he’d moved to stand behind me. One arm was around my waist, and he pulled my head back to rest on his shoulder.

I writhed against him. In a sexy way, not to get free.

He choked and arched his hips away.

Rude. Now I wanted to get free.

I bit his hand and he yelped, letting go.

I turned to face him, putting my hands on my hips and glaring.

In the low light, Jake looked like he was torn between laughter and some other emotion I couldn’t quite put my finger on.

“I’ve changed my mind,” I informed him crisply. “Hot, nasty, it’s-nearly-your-birthday-and-you-can-go-to-town-on-all-of-this-however-you-wantsex is off the table. You clearly don’t want it weird. That’s fine. You know what you get? Vanilla sex. That’s it.”

“God, I hope you’re still saying that later tonight,” he said with feeling. “Come here.”

“What are you?—”

He opened the front door and hustled me out.

“What on earth are you doing?” I demanded as he pulled the door shut and pressed me up against it.

“Improvising.”

“Improvising what?”

“Uh.” He ducked to kiss me and I jerked my head away. He sighed. “Adjusting. I didn’t mean improvising, I meant I’m adjusting my plan for the evening. I didn’t see it going quite like this.”

“Too late. I offered weird and you shot me down. Now I’ve adjusted my plan for the evening, and that plan is, you’re getting a big old serving of vanilla.”

He shifted his weight. “Ben, can you keep your voice down?” he said. “Just a tiny bit?”

I ignored him. “Vanilla. The most boring flavour of all. You know what? This sex is going to be so boring, I might even fall asleep in the middle of it. I’d say feel free to go ahead and keep thrusting, but that’s probably too kinky for you, what with being all about the vanilla. You’ll just have to pull out and deal with blue balls.”

“Ben,” he said on a desperate-sounding giggle.

“Oh no, sweetheart. We are going to have sex that is so incredibly dull,” I threatened. “I’ll lie there and say things like, yum. That’s so nice. Ooh. We’ll gaze tenderly into each other’s eyes. You heard me. Soul gazing. That’s what’s on the cards for you tonight. There was going to be bouncing and moaning. Now it’s soul gazing. If you’re lucky and I don’t fall asleep in the middle of it, I might lean up and give you a sweet little kiss on the lips to encourage you. Probably not, though.”

“Ben, this really, really isn’t the time to be discussing our sex life.”

“I think it’s the perfect time.”

“No.” He stepped into me, snatched me against him and clamped his hand over my mouth. Again.

Whatwas his deal, seriously?

“Do you trust me?” he said.

I rolled my eyes at him and nodded.

“Okay. I’m going to take my hand away and you’re not going to mention our…intimate relations…at all.”

Intimate relations?

“Okay?” he asked. “I have something I really need to get off my chest here, something I’ve been wanting to say for a while, and talking about bouncing and moaning and making it weird isn’t the vibe I’d had in mind for this specific moment. At all. Okay?”

“Okay,” I said against his hand.

He cautiously removed it.

We stared at each other in silence. I blinked at the look in his eyes—open, raw, and intense. Even though the diffused light from the street light nearby was dim, I could see it all shining through.

“Ben.” He touched my cheek softly. “I love you.”

I smiled at him. “And I love?—”

“Shh.”

“My god. Am I not allowed to talk at all?”

“It would probably be for the best.”

“Fine. Sorry. Carry on.”

He lowered himself to the doorstep.

Now, normally when Jake went to his knees before me, I could expect a swift unbuttoning and unzipping, and I’d be the delighted recipient of one of his top-notch blowjobs. Since we were outside, I was about to stop him, but then it hit me.

He went down on one knee, not two.

And his hand went into his own trousers, not mine.

My heart skipped a beat.

When he pulled his hand out, he was holding a small square box. He flicked it open with a thumb, and held up to me. “Ben Porter, will you marry me?” A classic, plain gold band sat in the box.

I opened my mouth but no sound came out.

He began to smile.

I took his face in my shaking hands, bent down, and kissed him.

Our lips parted softly and we…okay, fine.

We soul gazed.

“Well?” he said. “Was that a yes?”

“What do you think?”

“It seemed promising. But I’d like to hear you say it.”

“Yes,” I said.

Jake surged to his feet, caught my chin, and lifted my mouth to his. He kissed me and kissed me, until I was laughing and clutching his shoulders to stay upright.

“Come on,” I said when his kisses got more desperate, more demanding. “Come on, let’s go inside.” I wasn’t sure why he’d decided to propose on the doorstep, and right now, I didn’t care. All I cared about was getting some privacy. I fumbled behind me for the door handle.

“In a minute,” he said, stopping me.

“Okay,” I said breathlessly. “Oh. Yes. The ring!”

He’d taken it out of the box, stuffed the box in his pocket, and lifted my hand. “May I?”

“Please do.” I shivered when he slid it slowly down my finger.

It felt strange. Cold and heavy.

I was never taking it off.

Jake stared down at my hand, which he had gripped between his and was holding between us. “I’m starting to regret this.”

“That’s got to be the fastest case of buyer’s remorse in all of human history,” I said.

I’d have panicked, except the look on his face didn’t match his words. The look on his face wasn’t even close to regret. On the contrary, it was a look I was very familiar with. It was tight with need and hard with possession. It screamed: mine.

That was not the look of a man who had changed his mind, despite how it sounded.

“No,” he said quickly, and lifted my hand. He kissed the back of it fiercely. “Not this. Never this. Never you.”

“I know,” I said, smiling up at him.

“Do you?”

“Yes.” I shrugged. I wasn’t certain about many things in life, but Jake’s love was impossible to doubt. “So, if not this—oh—” he kissed my hand again, lips curving against it and eyes flaring when he saw what it did to me, “—then what exactly are you regretting? Proposing on the doorstep? Or…was that like a thing? A symbolic thing?”

He looked thoughtful. “That makes sense, doesn’t it?”

“Yes. We’re on the threshold of the next phase of our lives. I think it’s romantic. Good job.”

“It is romantic,” he said. “Or it could make a nice callback to our first kiss.”

“Our first kiss was at the ice rink. You just lost a point on that one.”

“First kiss with tongue.”

“Less romantic, but okay.” I looked at him suspiciously. “That’s not the reason, is it?”

“No. Nope. Sorry. Going forward, though, whenever we tell people this story, let’s say that’s why.”

“All right. Are you going to let me in on the real reason?”

The heat in his eyes shifted towards amusement. “I want you to remember that you love me.”

“I will never forget,” I vowed.

“And remember that this right here, this moment between us, was a romantic and beautiful moment.”

“Etched into my memory,” I assured him.

“God, I love you.” He dropped a quick kiss on my lips, straightened, and said, “Okay. Here it is. I may have got carried away when we were planning this whole thing.”

“I like it when you get carried away, and—wait.”

His words sank in.

…when we were planning….

…when we…

…we…

A yawning chasm of horror opened up deep inside me.

“We? We who?”

“I didn’t mean to tell him, Ben,” Jake said. “I had a moment of weakness, and next thing I knew, everything had spun out of control. You know what he’s like.”

“No,” I said.

“He floated the idea of celebrating your next big milestone and everything with you on Thursday, and said that you were fully on board with it. Carte blanche were his exact words. Or I never would have agreed.”

I gazed up into Jake’s face. He knew I’d forgive him anything, but he had the grace to look a little nervous, at least. “You bastard.”

He grinned. Probably because my lips were twitching. “It sounded like such a good idea in theory. I was going to propose, give Ravi the signal, and then…” He trailed off.

“Finish, please,” I said, holding onto his sides and digging my fingers in.

“Then the friends and family gathered in the kitchen would leap out, and ta-da! Surprise engagement party. You’d get all the fun of it but none of the buildup, which you hate. It was going to be seamless. And magical. Or something.”

“It’s definitely something.”

“But as soon as we got into the hall, I realised…” He broke off and gazed down at me. “I realised that I may have made a mistake.”

“Just to clarify, not the whole bit about proposing?”

“God, no,” he said. “You are mine for good. No take backs.”

“Yeah,” I whispered, stretching up to kiss him.

I should probably pace myself here. I was, after all, going to get to kiss him for the rest of my life. No need to wear my lips out on day one of happily ever after.

Just one more, though.

I always wanted one more.

He stroked my cheek and ran the back of his fingers along my jaw and down the side of my neck. “I thought about everyone in the kitchen listening, and I didn’t want them to hear it.”

“Good call,” I said. “I wouldn’t have wanted them to hear—” I broke off. “Oh my god.” The hands I had been gently smoothing up and down his sides turned into claws of desperation and I dug in. “Jake.”

“What is it?” His eyes widened.

“They heard me talking about our sex life.”

“No, no,” he said. “I’m sure they didn’t.”

“Why didn’t you stop me!”

“I did try.”

“Not hard enough. Not nearly hard enough!”

“Calm down. No one heard anything. The kitchen door was shut. I made Ravi promise. It was part of the plan. Party to celebrate, yes. Audience for the actual proposal, no.”

“If you’re so sure they can’t hear then why did you bring us out here, huh?”

He winced. “Nobody heard. And if they did, then it wasn’t that bad.”

“It was bad!”

He started laughing.

I shoved him. “I can’t believe you.”

He swayed back towards me and leaned his full weight against me. “How was I to know you’d get all sexy and try to seduce me the minute we walked in the door?”

“It’s Saturday night and I’m wearing my get-me-some jeans, that’s how. Also, don’t pretend like you haven’t been eye-fucking me for the last two and a half hours. You know what that kind of eye contact does to me!”

“Ben.” He tipped my chin up and gazed down at me. “Nobody heard. You weren’t that loud?—”

“I was loud! You told me to keep my voice down! That means I was loud!“

“You weren’t that loud.”

I was loud. I’d done it on sexy purpose!

“They were all in the kitchen, behind a shut door. And even if they did hear, then the worst they’d have heard was you offering to give it to me weird.” He only just managed to get that last bit out before he dissolved into very unmanly giggles.

“That is still off the table,” I said, desperately trying to believe him.

And really, it wasn’t that bad. Everyone knew we had a sex life. There is no shame in it. Did my mother need to hear things like that? No. Had she heard—and seen—worse? Sadly, yes. She once walked in on me as a teenager when I was fooling around with Harvey Wheeler, the son of Dad’s veterinary nurse.

More than once, she walked in on me fooling around with myself, until my dad took pity on me and quietly installed a lock on my bedroom door.

But that had been when I was a teenager!

“Are you sure?” Jake said. “Because I think I can convince you to change your mind.”

“I doubt it.”

“No? You mean after we’ve gone in there and put them out of their misery, you won’t let me have it? Vanilla, weird, however I want it?”

“Why are they miserable?”

“They’re going to think you said no, we’ve been out here so long.”

“Aha,” I said. “I mean, I could have said no.” I poked him in the chest. “This is why proposing in front of other people is a terrible idea. You’re either pressuring the other person to say yes so they don’t cause a scene, or you’re risking embarrassment in front of everyone you know.”

He caught my poking finger. “I didn’t propose in front of other people. Ravi suggested it?—”

“He is such a drama ho, seriously.”

“—but I said absolutely not. This bit is between you and me.”

“Mm-hmm. And the ten people earwigging in my kitchen. All of whom,” I added indignantly, “got the memo about us getting hitched before I did.”

“Ten people,” he said, and winced again.

“More than ten?”

“Listen, I’ve already told you that I got carried away, and I am sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I suppose I got swept up in the idea of, you know.” He had his hands on my hips and he firmed his grip, pulling me closer. “Winning you.”

“Winning me?”

“Yeah.”

“Like a prize?”

“Yeah. I’m good enough to snag Ben Porter. I want the world to know.”

The astonishing thing was, he wasn’t even being funny about it. He didn’t say it wryly, or with a twinkle in his eye or with a curl to his lips that said he was fighting back a smile.

He meant it.

My heart turned over. “Like you just competed in the Olympics and I’m the gold medal?”

He bit his lip and nodded.

I curled my hand around the back of his neck and drew him down to me, pressing our mouths together. “That’s incredibly flattering,” I murmured.

“It’s the truth.”

“Well,” I said, “I regret to inform you that you didn’t actually win gold on this occasion. You’re in second place with silver. Because I’m the one on the podium with the gold medal.”

“What?” he said, pulling back and scowling at me.

I really misjudged that one. And his competitiveness. I widened my eyes at him. “You,” I said. “You’re the gold medal.”

“No, Ben, I won the gold medal. Which is you.”

I hid my smile. “I beg to differ.”

“No, I…Ben. This is my metaphor. Don’t ruin it. I won the Olympic gold medal in boyfriends.”

“It’s my metaphor. You just said I was a prize. I was the one who brought up the Olympics.”

His scowl deepened.

“I’m waving to the crowd,” I said, and threw up a triumphant arm, waving to an imaginary audience behind him. “Everyone’s clapping and cheering.”

He growled and hauled my arm down. “Stop it. I won the gold medal.”

“Don’t be a sore loser. Silver is nothing to sneer at.”

He pinned my arms to my sides and bit my neck.

My knees went weak and I sagged against the door. “That’s cheating,” I said.

“Don’t care. I’ll cheat, I’ll be a sore loser, I’ll take silver instead of gold…I don’t even care. So long as I’ve got you. That’s the only thing that matters.”

“You have me,” I said, holding him tight. “You have me.”

He squeezed me hard against his body, then let out a huge sigh. “I really do regret this,” he said. “I’m not in the mood for a party right now?—”

“You mean a victory parade?” I said sweetly.

“All I want is to drag you upstairs and spend the next few hours making you scream. Ah, well. Live and learn. I’m not going to let Ravi anywhere near our wedding, I’ll tell you that much.” He opened the door and walked me backwards through it.

I did my best to smooth my hair down, and checked that all my buttons were buttoned and zips zippered. My lips felt hot and puffy and I was pretty sure I had stars in my eyes to match the ones in Jake’s, but there wasn’t anything I could do about that now.

“You ready?” Jake said.

“Yes. Let’s do it. What’s the signal?”

Jake drew me into the sitting room after him , took a deep breath, and said loudly, “He said yes!”

“That’s inventive,” I muttered, and he elbowed me.

I braced in anticipation of the door bursting open and Ravi hosing us down with champagne.

Nothing happened.

We exchanged glances.

Jake raised his voice. “He said yes!”

Still nothing.

“Wait there.” He strode across to the kitchen door and snatched it open, saying, “You missed the sig...huh.”

“Huh?” I followed him, and stared into the kitchen. “Huh.”

It was empty.

Well. Empty of people.

The kitchen island was an absolute riot of flowers and cake and balloons, a huge silver ice bucket with champagne chilling, and a tray with two glasses on it, tied together with a big pink ribbon.

“What?” Jake said, bewildered.

I shoved him out of my way and beelined for the cake.

“Oh my god,” I said. “Look at this thing.”

It was, I shit you not, two feet tall. It was twice as big as the one he’d bought for my fortieth birthday. It looked like a wedding cake.

Scratch that, it was a wedding cake.

It was a gorgeous, delicious-looking monster of a wedding cake. A great big four-tier pink concoction with buttercream icing and sequins.

There were even two little men in tuxedos on the top. They were wearing ice skates. It was easy to tell which one was supposed to be Jake and which one was supposed to be me, because one of them was bent over laughing, and the other one was facedown in the buttercream.

My skating hadn’t improved much since we first met, despite Jake’s best efforts. I was great at falling, though.

I’d never seen a cake that big in real life.

It was bigger than my cousin Sophie’s cocker spaniel.

“Where is everyone?” Jake said, confused.

“Not here.” I darted to the cutlery drawer and snatched a knife out of the block above it. “Who cares?” I eyed the cake, reconsidered, and got a bigger knife.

“He was supposed to…I mean, he said he’d bring a cake, but this is…this is a lot.”

“I know,” I said gleefully. “We’ll be eating it for a month. Do you want to cut it or shall I?”

Jake hooked a finger in the ice bucket and tipped it towards him. He grunted. “Ice hasn’t melted.”

“Okay, Sherlock. What does that mean?”

“It means someone was here not that long ago.”

We stared at each other.

“Do you think they all ran away because we took so long and they thought I said no?” I said.

My dad would have headed the charge out the backdoor. He had a problem with secondhand embarrassment, which truly was a cross to bear, considering me and my mother.

“No,” Jake said. He picked up the obnoxiously large card propped beside the ice bucket and scanned it. “This was a double bluff.”

He passed me the card.

It was from Ravi.

Happy Engagement, my friends.

PS: Ben, I told you I was the discreetest person you ever met.

PPS: Jake, I told you I knew how to throw the perfect engagement party.

PPPS: Enjoy, losers!

“That dick,” Jake said with feeling.

I laughed. “Did you want to have loads of people here?”

“No. Like I said, I regretted the whole idea practically at once but I felt, you know. Committed. And then Ravi just kept texting me about it. He wouldn’t let up. I should have suspected something.”

“Of course you should. It’s Ravi. Then again, I’ve known him since I was three years old and I still fall for his shit. Don’t beat yourself up.”

“It was pretty obvious, now I think about it. He said he’d take care of everything, and all I had to do was on pain of death not to even mention it to anyone because he wanted everyone to think it would be a huge surprise to both of us. Which—” he waved an arm around the kitchen, “—it obviously was.”

I smiled. “No one else knows,” I said confidently.

“What?”

“That’s why he did it.” I looped my arms around his waist and eased him around so his arse was propped against the edge of the island. “He knew that I’d be pissed off if I was the last to know about my own engagement.”

Jake grimaced. “The more I think about it, the more I realise what a terrible idea this was in the first place. I bought the rings six months ago, Ben. It’s taken me that long to get up the nerve to ask you.”

I gazed up at him. Get up the nerve? “Did you really think I’d say no?”

“No. Still, some part of me wakes up next to you every day and my first thought is, I can’t believe I get to wake up next to this man.”

I shook my head.

“Yeah,” he said, tilting up my chin and holding it. “I love you. Six months I hid that box in my gym bag.”

Wise choice. The one place I’d never go.

“Sometimes, I was walking around with it in my pocket. I nearly proposed once when we were watching Jurassic World for the hundredth time, but you told me to shush because it was getting to the good bit.”

It was my favourite movie, and I wouldn’t apologise for it. I never claimed to have good taste.

Except in men.

My taste in men was stellar.

I couldn’t really wrap my head around the idea that he’d been trying to ‘get up the nerve’ to ask me to marry him, and he’d been on the brink of it for six months while I’d been blithely going about my day, doing things like putting the bins out, hanging up laundry, lounging on the sofa with my head on his lap while watching velociraptors cheerfully murder people.

I really couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that Ravi had somehow managed to surprise us both with an engagement party that was supposed to be a surprise only to me.

He truly was a party wizard.

I’d never hear the end of it.

“So,” I said.

“So?”

“Shall we get this party started?”

Jake flexed against me. “What did you have in mind?”

“Are you kidding?” I gestured at the cake. “Obviously we’ll start with—” Jake ducked his head and kissed me. “Or,” I said breathlessly when he pulled back, “we save the cake and the bubbly until after.”

“I like the sound of that.”

~END~