Page 166 of Fire Fight

“Is he awake?” Birdie asked. “Can we see him?”

“He’s not awake yet. We’ve got him pretty heavily sedated. But a few of you can go back and sit with him if you’d like.”

“Mom and Aspen,” Trey said automatically. “Then we can rotate after that.”

I shot Trey a grateful smile, then grabbed Birdie’s profferedhand, following the doctor out and into the emergency department.

“It’s not up to me to tell a doctor how to do his job,” Birdie whispered, “but I don’t like the words ‘heavily sedated’ very much. Not with his history.”

“That makes two of us. Let’s check on him, then we can make the team aware of his previous addiction issues.”

Birdie nodded, and we proceeded forward, locked arm in arm.

That cloying, antiseptic smell hung in the air, and I had to force myself to keep my feet moving. Being back here—even if it wasn’t the same hospital from either of my previous ordeals—brought up all kinds of bad memories. In that moment, I vowed to find a therapist at the first opportunity to work through my lingering issues, but this wasn’t about me. This was about being there for Crew. Hand still gripping Birdie’s tightly—honestly, I couldn’t tell which of us was keeping which upright and moving—we entered Crew’s room.

The first thing I noticed was how small he appeared. This larger than life man, the one who’d stolen my heart and saved me in more ways than even he knew, had his arm wrapped in a sling, heavy white gauze wrapped around his head, an IV line snaking from the hand of his bad arm.

And it was all my fault.

Birdie let me go and moved to his bedside, gently brushing his hair off his forehead, leaning in to press a kiss there.

“My baby boy,” she murmured. “You got yourself into a real mess this time.”

“I—” I started, unsure what I’d been about to say. Fuck, this was harder than I thought it’d be. I hadn’t balked at getting into the ambulance with him, so why was this tripping me up?

Birdie’s gaze snapped to where I stood, suspended in the doorway, unable to cross the threshold. As if sensing that, she walked back over to me, guiding me to Crew’s side.

“It’s okay,” she whispered. “He’s going to be okay, honey. You’re going to get that time together. Right now, he needs you here with him. Even if he’s not awake, I believe he can sense us. Talk to him. Give him your strength.”

She pressed a kiss to my temple, holding me for a beat and allowing me to soak up all that motherly warmth. Then she gave Crew’s hand a squeeze and left me alone with him.

No one else appeared to take her place, so I had to assume she was giving me and Crew the space I needed for me to get some things off my chest. To share with him what was in my heart.

So I did what she suggested, I pulled up a chair, cradled Crew’s hand in mine, and talked.

I told him anything and everything I could think of, from stories of my childhood and how much I’d idolized my sister, how much I missed her, to dreams of what I thought our future should look like. An hour passed in a blink, and my throat was raw from endless talking.

“I never planned on you, you know,” I said, smiling through my tears, eyelids fluttering closed against my blurred vision. “This was only supposed to be another stop, another map dot and a pat on the back for a job well done. But this case was the best thing that ever happened to me, because it brought me toyou.”

“Despite almost dying?”

My eyes flew open, landing on the gorgeous blue depths of Crew’s.

I choked on a sob. “Despite almost dying,” I agreed. Rising to my feet, I bent over him and dropped a gentle kiss to his forehead, murmuring against his skin, “God, you scared me.”

“How long have I been out?” he asked, his voice rough and pained.

“About twelve hours.”

The sun beyond the hospital had long since risen, though Crew’s curtains remained closed.

He tried to shift on the bed, instantly hissing in pain. “Fuck. Everything hurts.”

“That’s to be expected,” a new voice intoned, and I jerked my head around to face the doctor.

“Let’s hear it then.”

The doctor’s voice remained flat as he detailed all of Crew’s injuries, and another curse slipped past my man’s lips when he finished.