Page 31 of Fey Empire (Fey Lords #5)

Chapter thirty

I wake up with a start. The curtains are still drawn, but it is morning. I am alone in bed, surrounded by pillows, with the covers tucked up under my chin.

Every muscle I possess is sore, and my ass feels hollowed out. My neck stings, as do bits of my back and arms. I think I’m covered in bite marks.

Wow. What a night. Selwyn’s behaviour was very unexpected. Almost as unexpected as how much I enjoyed it.

“There is water on the side table.”

I yelp. Selwyn is sitting in an armchair by the drawn curtains, dressed in a green satin dressing gown. Staring at me.

Gingerly, I heave myself up into a sitting position. My muscles protest, and things leak out of places.

I reach for the tall glass of water and gulp it down. It is cold and refreshing. I didn’t realise I was thirsty, but I feel much better now. I drink it all, and place the glass back carefully.

Selwyn is still staring at me. He is half in shadow, making his expression hard to read. Is he still in rut? He seems calm. Terribly calm. Eerily still .

I watch as he slowly rises from the chair and walks towards me with a cautious grace. He reaches the side of the bed. He is out of the shadows now, and I can see him clearly.

There is a look of profound sadness and grief in his gold-flecked eyes. My heart thumps against my rib cage. What is wrong?

He gracefully sinks to his knees and bows his head.

What the hell is he doing? Princes do not kneel. Mages do not bow their heads. Especially not to their vessels.

“I do not deserve your forgiveness,” he says quietly. “However, I wish for you to know that I am remorseful enough to beg for it.”

Oh. Oh my sweet goddess and all the stars. He thinks his rut was too much for me. And why wouldn’t he think that? I fell apart after our wedding night. I have been scared of him. He knows I fear everything. I am in every way the little lamb he calls me.

A long, curved dagger appears in his hand. My body recoils in alarm. Where did that come from?

“If you will accept the offering, I will cut off my horns and lay them at your feet.”

“No!” I gasp.

If he had gone into rut even a week ago, it would have been too intense for me. Absolutely. But it didn’t happen a week ago, it happened last night. After I took his horn into my mouth.

“Losing you forever is the penance I will suffer. Giving you my horns is but a token of my shame.”

The knife lifts.

I fly out of bed and fall down to my knees in front of him. My fingers wrap around his wrist, even though he is far stronger than me and I have no chance of physically stopping him.

“Please don’t,” I croak.

Grief and immense sorrow are swirling in his beautiful eyes. “I hurt you. The most precious thing in all of the worlds, and I hurt you. You will never trust me after this. I deserve to lose you. And you deserve an apology.”

“Selwyn, no,” I plead. “I’m fine. It was rough and wild and intense…”

My words stutter to a stop. A fierce blush heats my cheeks. “And I loved it.”

Selwyn blinks. Then he fixes me with an incredulous look.

I suck in a quick breath. “I’m not scared of you anymore. I no longer think you are a monster. And… and you have shown me that sex is not shameful.”

I fall silent. Selwyn stares at me. I think I have rendered him speechless. That’s okay because I have more to say.

“I know it was a rut!” I blurt. “It was biology that cannot be denied or fought. Any more than an omega in heat can control their need to be filled. I also know I threw you into your rut by sucking your horn. I didn’t understand what effect it would have, and you didn’t know I was going to do that. ”

I pause.

“Last night was an accident. A glorious, enjoyable accident.”

Selwyn’s brow furrows. Then his eyes narrow. “If I stabbed you, you would apologise for getting my dagger bloody.

“Probably,” I admit .

His eyes widen. Then he barks out a laugh. A short, sharp sound of surprise.

My lips curl up in a smile.

His eyes glow for a heartbeat, then he shakes himself like a dog, or a wolf.

He flows to his feet and the next thing I know, I’m in his arms, in a bridal carry. Being carried somewhere.

“I used you and hurt you. Violated you. And now you are comforting me.” he states. “I’m being a self-obsessed ass. You deserve better. I will do better. You have my vow on this.”

We reach the wonderful bathroom. He walks right into the water with me still in his arms. The hot water instantly soothes my sore muscles, and I sigh in bliss.

Whatever happened to my nightgown? I don’t remember taking it off last night.

Just as that thought crosses my mind, a tattered strap of white cloth bobs past, floating on the surface of the water.

Oh that’s what happened to it. Selwyn ripped it off of me.

He sees the remnant and makes a distressed sound. Then he takes a deep breath, sits on the underwater seat and arranges me on his lap.

This is becoming a habit I really could get accustomed to. Imagine making each other cum every night or morning, and then bathing together like this? Heavenly.

Selwyn’s soft lips brush tenderly over my neck. My eyes flutter closed. He is kissing where he bit me.

His lips move to another spot, further along on my shoulder. Then another spot.

Oh my goodness. I think he is going to kiss every bite mark and bruise on my body .

“Lips are softer than a sponge,” he says. Then he kisses another bite mark.

My head drops back as all my muscles sag.

“I will serve you forever,” Selwyn whispers.

My heart flutters. My stomach flips. My mind spins.

I think this is a swoon. I think I am swooning.

And nobody can blame me.

H allelujah. The fates are finally smiling on me. There are only ten more thank-you letters left to write. I am very nearly free of them.

I stretch in my chair. Then I try to rub the cramp out of my hand.

Loki’s tail thumps against the floor where she is sprawled, and I turn around just in time to see Dyfri stride in through the secret door.

“Tea?” I offer.

I have no idea why he didn’t use the main door and knock, but I’m still going to treat him like a guest.

Oh, actually, I do know why he can’t use the front door. He can’t be seen visiting me. Not after all the scandal I have caused.

He shakes his head. “I am not staying for long.”

His dark eyes drop down to the side of my neck and stay there. I slap my hand over the bite mark, and I blush fiercely.

“Everything okay?” he asks .

I nod frantically. Sweet goddess, I’m going to die of mortification. I should have worn a scarf even though I wasn’t expecting any visitors.

Dyfri nods in acceptance. He is going to drop it, thank goodness.

“We need to talk about Mabon.”

Mabon? Okay. I was not expecting that. Although, this is a far more pleasant topic than discussing all the rumours flying around about us.

“I found out who hurt him.”

I blink. That was damn quick, although I don’t know why I am surprised. This is Dyfri. I have no doubt that he is capable of anything he puts his mind to.

And he is far, far more clever than I am. I cannot fathom how he figured out from Mabon’s funny turn that someone had hurt him. This is why I am terrible at plotting.

“It was the Resistance.” Dyfri stares at me with a deeply intense look.

My brow furrows. Why is he telling me this? I mean, it sounds awful, and I feel for Mabon, I really do. But Dyfri doesn’t strike me as the type to give information freely. Or to gossip.

He rolls his eyes. “I need names.”

My jaw drops. Why the hell does everyone think I’m involved with the Resistance? What is it about me that gives that impression? Is it simply because I am human?

“You gave me a truth serum!” I splutter. “You know I don’t have anything to do with any of that.”

He crosses his arms over his chest. “They captured him. Did things to him.”

My stomach rolls over while my blood turns cold .

“They unbound his hair.”

Dyfri’s dark eyes blaze. Goosebumps shiver along my skin. The sunlight dims, and everything grows heavy and oppressive.

I swallow dryly. Holy stars. By the sound of it, having your hair unbound is worse than torture. I wonder what the hell it meant when I undid mine.

Dyfri continues to glare at me. My gaze helplessly tracks down his long undone hair. I try to swallow again, but I can’t. My heart aches. Oh my poor Dyfri.

He stiffens. Oh fuck, he caught me looking at his hair. Now I am in trouble.

“I don’t know anything! I swear!” I exclaim hurriedly.

His eyes narrow.

“I’ve never had anything to do with the Resistance. I don’t know anything about anything. I will swear on anything you like. I’ll take another truth serum.”

Because actually the first time only proved I had nothing to do with the assassination attempt. It doesn’t prove I’m not involved in anything else. Heaven knows there are factions within factions.

“Blake believes you are working with them.”

My heart drops. I took the note. I passed it on. I am involved. Does this mean Selwyn is working with the people who hurt his brother?

And… oh my sweet goddess. No wonder Blake doesn’t like me. He thinks I’m aligned with the people who hurt his prince. But wait, I thought Blake used to be with the Resistance?

I’m so confused. I can feel my face scrunching up with the effort of trying to puzzle this all out .

Dyfri sighs heavily and uncrosses his arms. “Alright, I believe you.”

He does? Hope flutters through me.

“You are far too dumb to be in the Resistance.”

“As dumb as a hamster.” I nod eagerly. His previous assessment of me was quite correct.

Dyfri laughs. Rich and melodious. “Let's have that tea.”

That’s the best idea I have ever heard.