Page 27 of Fated or Knot (UnseelieVerse: The Omega Masquerade #1)

27

LARK

D inner was life-changing. Everything they served me tasted incredible. I had a moment with the herb-and-breadcrumb-stuffed chicken, wondering how they got it under the skin. Fal and Tormund ate with me, while Marius left unannounced at some point.

“All he eats is raw meat and sadness anyway,” Tormund had muttered.

They left me for the evening with reluctance, but I wanted a bath so badly at that point. Jani and Lon helped me to the rain room, which they called a “shower.” They happily told me it was a human invention, which meant no magic went into summoning the warm water that washed down on me. Yet it felt truly magical.

I dried off and practically begged my handmaidens to go and rest. They’d done everything to help me get around and redressed in sleeping clothes short of getting in the shower with me.

“It’s an honor to be picked as a handmaiden,” Lon told me with a fluttery giggle.

“Especially when a princess needs extra hands. We could stay by your nest in case you need anything tonight?” Jani offered.

“Please, go take time for yourselves,” I said again.

They walked me all the way to my nest before promising to be back in the morning with breakfast. They turned off the essence lamps as they went, leaving me with one, a ball of light that floated right over my shoulder as I made my way to my new bed.

Before I inspected the items, I opened the note left for me.

Dearest Metalark,

Welcome back to the family! Please accept this nestwarming gift from us.

Ambriel gave you her favorite stuffed kelpie. She knows he’ll guard you in your sleep.

Eletha gave you a reading faelight. “Everyone should have a light and hope in the dark of night.” She is something of a reader and hopes you are the same.

Siora gave you one of her pillows. She wishes you comfort and support as you settle in.

Tanith gave you the dark blanket. It may not look like much, but it will keep you warm in the Serian winter.

And I have given you the silk blanket knowing dreamlanders appreciate having their stars a little closer to home.

Love,

Nemensia

My lips wobbled in appreciation. Here in my nest, I could be as vulnerable as I wanted, so I finally wept with joy as I decorated my bed with the gifts. I shook the faelight first, eager to see it in motion. It leapt up several feet and lit like an essence lamp, but that light compacted into the form of a butterfly that circled overhead. It would be perfect for reading in bed.

I inspected the details on the kelpie toy with a curious eye. It was clearly already loved by a small omega, with extra stitches in the fabric on its tail and legs. I was more curious about the shape of a stationary water horse. It resembled the more humble horse I knew from its barrel up to its head, with a more predatory set to its eyes and a hint of fangs in its mouth. At the hips, it transitioned to a thick fish tail with fins.

I laid the blankets on top of the sheets the bed was already set with and rested my head on the soft pillow from Siora when I was ready to rest. My fingers explored the texture of the blankets in quiet approval. The one from Tanith was a dark neutral color, but it was dense and trapped my body heat effectively.

My fingertips froze mid-stroke when investigating Nemensia’s gift. I recognized exactly what it was, the same material as the finest traditional pixie garments, Lavir spidersilk. This blanket shimmered with patterns of stars painted over a black background, sure to be stunning in the light of day. It was ludicrously expensive, and here I was, nesting with it.

I thought of Kauz and drifted to sleep with a purr, the stuffed kelpie hugged to my chest.

Alas, just thinking of him didn’t plonk me straight into his dream. I woke to a cheerful pair of moth fae calling from the privacy curtain that it was time to get up. Jani and Lon were just as excited to see me as yesterday when I was done cursing the tenderness under my arms and emerged from the nest. “Good morning. Can you two keep a secret?” I asked.

“Anything that will help us serve you better, Princess,” Jani squeaked.

I switched languages, telling them in their native Serian that they didn’t have to struggle with Theli while I was the only one in the suite. Their antennae shot straight up before quivering. I took that as surprise and excitement, respectively.

“You can also help me practice,” I continued. With my bilingual childhood still a fresh memory, I didn’t butcher the words with a heavy Theli accent, either. “But no one else needs to know about this right now.”

“Of course, Princess,” Lon said, both of them nodding along.

They guided me to my new closet. My new…walk-in closet. I’d thought Kauz had bought me a lot of clothes, but seeing them all hanging up neatly and arranged by color put it into perspective. There were racks and racks of room to expand.

I locked on to the sight of a particular cloak hanging separately from the rest. I balanced on my right crutch and turned it on its hanger, gasping with delight when I saw an embroidery of snowflakes and curlicues for eddies of wind added to the bottom in white thread. The designs completely hid where it’d once been ripped at the bottom.

The embroidery reminded me of Fal, and once we picked out an outfit for the day and I put the cloak on overtop it, I caught a strong whiff of his sunshine and grass scent. He’d gotten it repaired for me. I needed to go kiss him in thanks.

I had a nice conversation with Jani and Lon over a breakfast of pastries and fruit—not too much to eat, so it wasn’t something Tormund delivered—before setting out for the day. I was going to explore the palace. I just had to get around the door. After fumbling the knob a few times, I nudged it open and adjusted my hold on the crutches when they clicked on the marble outside.

Standing just past the alcove that sheltered my door was Marius, who swung around with raised brows when he saw me. He moved his big body in my way. “Do you need something?” he rumbled.

I came to a stop and wobbled before finding my balance. “Not particularly,” I said.

He tilted his head in clear confusion.

“Could you move?” I lifted my left crutch and motioned toward the side.

His nostrils flared, and he didn’t budge an inch.

I felt like I was talking to his beast again, the part of him with extremely selective hearing. “Get out of my way, Marius,” I grumped.

“You need to rest,” he finally said.

“I’m tired of resting. I’m bathed and dressed and want to see my new home.” I tapped my left crutch on the ground to punctuate my statement before placing it down properly.

He considered me for a few more moments before eventually nodding in acknowledgment. “Fine. Where are we going?”

“This is not a ‘we’ kind of outing.”

He crowded closer, leaning in and dropping his voice. I could practically feel his deep tone. “You are clearly an injured and unclaimed omega. Every outing is a ‘we’ kind of outing. If anyone dares to put their starsdamned hands on you, I will be there to break some wrists. Now, tell me where we’re going.” My belly quivered as he spoke. Betrayal at its finest.

I took in a deep breath to recenter myself. A bit of a mistake, as I took in a heady sniff of his scent. He was very minty today. And leaning in so close, I could try to press my lips to the unforgiving line of his. “Marius,” I whispered.

His stare only seemed to grow more intense as he waited for me to speak.

Now wasn’t the time for a vulnerable question. He was in full predator mode, sure to go for the throat when presented a hint of weakness. I packed away everything I really wanted to say and went for levity. “Have you considered a lip ring?”

His ear flicked twice. Stars, that question must’ve really annoyed him. “What?” he growled.

“You have what, five piercings? You could have a lip ring too. Or maybe pierced ears,” I continued.

Marius shook his head, straightening. “Are you trying to distract me?”

“Is it working?”

“Aye. Go on. I’ll follow.” He stepped aside so I could pass. My crutches clacked loudly as I steered myself into the hallway and looked right and left. My new suite was up against the end of the hall, across from a marble stairwell leading to more rooms on the second story. I turned in the direction I wanted to go.

Marius kept pace, slowing his stride to remain beside me. “They’re not piercings for decoration. They’re kelpie tags, designed to identify me in my shifted form,” he said.

I hummed. “Do they get bigger when you shift?”

“They’d be worthless if they didn’t.”

“Will you tell me more kelpie facts?” I invited.

“Only if you tell me where we’re going.”

A small price to pay if he’d let me pester him with questions. Maybe it’d transition to Marius facts instead and I could figure out his hot-and-cold act. “I don’t know. I just wanted to explore.”

“Hmm. Let’s go to the library and see Eletha. You’ll like her,” he said.

I perked up. After her gift of the faelight, she’d been the princess I’d wanted to reconnect with first. “All right.”

“What kind of facts were you hoping to hear?”

“Just anything. I don’t know much about Unseelie races,” I admitted.

“Hmm. The basics, then. We’re called a nixie’s favorite companion because we’re ideal mates for them. Water fae, predominantly male alphas, and loyal due to the kelpie bond. This way.”

We’d reached a turn into a hallway more filled with fae, uniformed servants and other officials going about their day. Eyes turned our way, and the closest fae acknowledged him and his status as a prince. I resisted the urge to bring my shoulders up when I realized most of these strangers were looking at me. Marius continued to wear his hard and unfriendly expression as he stayed alert beside me.

There didn’t seem to be any danger. Most of the fae we passed simply seemed curious. But he didn’t say anything else on our trip to the library, past the occasional acknowledgment toward other males he knew.

I had the impression we crossed most of the palace, heading across a main artery that we’d accessed toward the back and side of the massive building. I tired out by the time we reached the other side of the palace and came to a set of doors labeled “Library Tower.”

Marius took a deep breath once we were inside and exhaled some of his tension. He met my eyes for a moment and murmured, “This is one of my favorite places.”

“I’m going to be right there with you,” I said, extra excited when I realized we were absolutely surrounded by books. Osme Fen was too small to have a library, so most of the books in my room had been keepsakes from my father’s travels or bartered goods I’d gotten by trading less-beloved novels for a chance to read something new.

I just hoped they had a section with books written in Theli. Otherwise, I was going to study written Serian day and night until my eyes blurred to take advantage of the Library Tower. I made my way around slowly, taking in how everything was set up.

As it was a tower, the room was circular, with stacks full of books set at an angle to form a fan around a desk set in the heart of the first floor. A handful of fae wandered about, picking out books. Curved bookshelves lined the walls as well, floor to ceiling, with rolling ladders available at regular intervals. There was a spiraling staircase up to the next level, which I noted with an internal sigh. I was to be limited to the first level, then.

Marius tilted his head, indicating I should follow him. We headed to the center of the room and the two desks set below floating signs that said “Check Out” and “Return.” The desks were shaped like half-moons, with a small divider in between. Check Out was a pristine arc of empty wood with a librarian, a beta naga, coiled up on her tail and waiting with a friendly expression.

Return was another story. There were papers and books scattered all over the desk in haphazard piles, and the librarian in charge of it was bent over a journal, scribbling. Her white-streaked fins twitched, then extended around her in a billow of gossamer. “That’s a great idea,” she said to herself.

“Eletha,” Marius said.

Her pen scribbled its way right off the page as she jumped. She was an adult nixie now, but a lot about her hadn’t changed, only sized up. She still had big blue eyes that sparkled with stars, made huge behind a thick pair of glasses. Fine-boned and petite, she matched her full brother, Kauz, with light purple skin and white hair that she’d thrown atop her head in a messy bun. When she spotted Marius, her face lit up.

“Hey! It’s about time you came to visit,” she exclaimed in Serian.

She got up and jumped at him. He caught her for a big hug and swung her around so her fins swirled around before he set her down next to me. “I’ve been meaning to. I read everything you gave me for the trip, plus a terrible book I bought from an Ilysnor bookstore,” he said.

“Tell me the title, and we’ll ban it from the library,” she offered.

“Definitely.” He cleared his throat, switching back to speaking Theli. “Eletha, this is Lark?—”

“Oh my stars,” the nixie squealed, switching too. “ The Lark?”

“Hi,” I giggled. “Thank you for the faelight. I’m eager to use it once I find something to read.”

She wiggled her shoulders in a little dance. “I knew you’d be a reader! Marius needs a mate who can keep up with how many books he chews through.”

“I’m going to try,” I said, glancing at him curiously. He’d averted his gaze, maybe embarrassed. “Do you have a section of books written in Theli?”

“Do we ever. Fourth floor,” she said. Then she adjusted her glasses higher on the bridge of her nose. “Hmm, if we can get you there right now. I only heard a little bit about what happened. You’ll have to tell me what put you in that cast.”

“It’s a lot,” I warned.

“The best stories are!”

“I’ll carry you, Lark,” Marius offered.

Stars, I’d barely made it a day before running into a situation where I needed to be carried. “It’s fine, we can come back later,” I sighed.

“But.” He raised his brows and gave me a meaningful look. “Books you can read, though.”

I folded easily with that argument and the sight of him being a little less serious. He took the stairs carefully, given that I was holding my crutches and they were likely to clip someone or the wall on our spiraling ascent. Eletha skipped ahead. She must have amazing calf strength.

Each floor had fewer books and more nooks to read them in, the space narrowing closer to the top of the tower. On the second floor, every seat was occupied, though by the fourth, there were several seats open. Marius put me on my feet and held my waist as I maneuvered the crutches back into place. I wouldn’t admit it out loud, but it’d been nice to take some pressure off the forming bruises under my arms.

“So,” Eletha said brightly. “What do you like to read?”

We chattered about books, and she pulled several titles off the shelves to recommend. We only had a few titles that we’d read in common, considering they’d had to have been translated from one language to the other.

Still, it was very easy to talk to her. I hadn’t had much omega company but found her soft voice and scent soothing. She was something of an author herself, mid-revision of book she’d been working on for quite some time. She promised to tell me all about it later.

Marius stood a safe distance away, holding a column of books that grew taller every time she recommended one. Eventually, he said, “I think she has plenty to read now.”

“Okay, maybe,” she said, turning to look at him and laughing when she saw how many books he was balancing. “Lark, why don’t you browse a bit and see if there’s anything else you want to check out. Our Theli language titles aren’t all that popular, so no one’s going to miss them if you take a bunch.”

I grinned. I could definitely make some books disappear, especially if no one minded if they went into my new study. She’d stacked up so many recommendations that I probably wouldn’t get through them all in five years, but I still wandered the room to see what else was here.

Marius sat on a couch toward the center of the room with his sister, the two of them chatting quietly in Serian. I toured the room and ended up spotting and pulling a book I’d loved back home. As I wandered over to place it on one of the two stacks he had split my acquisitions into, Eletha was saying, “You just have to pick a theme. That’s the best way to start.”

“This is real life, not a story. I can’t fuck this up too,” he answered.

Though I burned with curiosity, I went back to the bookshelves. I was starting to feel bad for eavesdropping, though I was sure I’d catch some secrets if I kept doing it before one of the princes caught on.

I picked out two more books I recognized, catching Eletha holding his hand between two of hers and saying, “It will work out.”

Her nails were cut short and rounded, which reminded me that I wanted to do the same with mine. Partially so I didn’t poke holes in any pages, but mostly because I wasn’t used to having needle-sharp nixie nails nor the webbing that still rippled up and down my hands with little control.

Marius looked doubtful. I’d seen that expression way too much when his brothers were talking about how fast their mother’s approval of me would come. Whether it was pessimism or worry at work was anyone’s guess.

“Wait, Lark, don’t sit down,” she said once I started to settle into a chair nearby. “Marius is going to take you to the library nest for a bit.”

“Your nest?” I asked, shocked she would invite me to it so casually.

“Oh, no, it’s more of a comfortable group space. We made it with Siora, Kauz, and Dad to have a room for quiet time but together,” she giggled. “It was nice to meet you! Hope I see you soon.”

I hoped so too. We waved farewell, and she took the majority of my new acquisitions with her, promising to come back, get the rest, and send them along to my new rooms. I picked out a single book to delve into and let Marius carry me again, as the library nest was at the very top of the tower. “I fucking hate stairs,” I muttered.

The kelpie glanced down at me. “I think that’s the first time I’ve heard your curse. Why at stairs, of all things?”

“They’re the worst,” I informed him.

He shrugged. “Go up and down the tower enough, and you won’t even notice them,” he said.

We spiraled up and up, passing a fifth and sixth floor that mostly resembled study spaces, and came to a door locked with a magic sigil rather than a knob. He pressed his hand to it, and it unlocked. “Thalas or Kauz can add your palm to the spell if you like it up here,” he murmured.

There wasn’t a chance I wouldn’t after I got a glimpse of the nest beyond. Wind whistled outside audibly at this height, though the walls must’ve been padded, as it wasn’t much colder here than the rest of the tower. The space was curved like the inside of an oversized bulb, with three triangular windows above covered in icy patterns from the weather. A swarm of faelights circled just out of reach, all designed as different bugs, birds, or bats that flew around aimlessly.

An essence lamp hovered in the dead center of the room, emitting more heat than light. It was clear this space was half owned by omegas, with the other half by big males that wanted to sprawl. One side had blankets, pillows, cushions, and an unfolded sofa bed—perfect for getting cozy. The other side had a couple of tables and huge armchairs made either for the alpha behind me or the winged dream wardens.

I saw Eletha and Thalas’s presence in the way board games, puzzle pieces, and decks of cards were scattered at random rather than being stacked neatly. Marius released an annoyed snort and started picking up after them. I knelt to feel out the blankets, muffling a squeal of happiness against one when I discovered it was fleece.

I turned to maneuver myself to an armchair, just to pause when I saw how Marius’s eyes had dilated. He was staring. “Do you…want to keep that?” he asked with effort. “I doubt anyone would mind.”

“Maybe,” I murmured, easing past him while dragging it behind me. I tripped within two paces, and he rushed to catch me.

“I would have helped you, p’nixie,” he said in his roughened, possibly feral voice. He placed me in a chair and tucked the blanket around my legs. Then he gazed up at me from where he sat with his legs tucked under him, smiling.

Yes, the beast was back. This was the side of Marius that looked at me with open affection. I didn’t have the sense that I was in danger. If anything, his feral side seemed to like me a lot more than his prince side ever did.

“I know you,” I told that beast. “I remember you now.”

He gave me a lopsided grin, flashing fangs. It faded as he blinked a few times, returning to himself and muttering a curse. “I usually have better control than this,” he growled.

“It’s all right. Your beast is kind,” I said. Unlike you sometimes.

He took in where he was and sighed through his nose. “Distract me. Please.”

“You didn’t give me many kelpie facts,” I ventured.

“Ask me anything.”

“Will you tell me how a kelpie bond works?”

He pinched the scarred ridge of his nose. “Of all the questions you could’ve asked,” he griped.

“Sorry, never m?—”

“I did say anything. And it is a cornerstone of Serian culture at this point.” He inspected the rug below, tugging on loose threads. “My kind seek their riders, who are also their fated mates. The pull for companionship is strong . We mate for life with an additional bond outside of regular pack bonds, mind to mind, for communicating underwater.”

“And that makes kelpie loyalty,” I ventured.

He nodded in agreement. “Once mated, my kind shave half their heads and grow the rest long. We braid mementos in our hair from our mates, which transition with us into our second forms. It’s proud, ancient tradition. The unmated and those who’ve survived the loss of their other half don’t do this.”

“I see. Thank you for explaining all that to me,” I said.

I had seen a few kelpies today sporting that look. Combined with the piercings, they were notable even in a crowd. This male would look striking if he styled himself the same way.

Marius took a ragged breath and fixed his predator eyes on me. “I…used to resent all of this. As the years have passed, I hated the visual sign that so many of my people have had something I was denied.”

It sounded like he was dragging every word out with effort. There was pain there, but anger too. Enough that I leaned away instinctively.

“As I have despised the very concept of fate.” He scoffed bitterly. “Some invisible force deciding who is a scent match, or a fated mate, and who loses said mate before they ever get to know them. I urged my brothers to give up on finding Pack Sorles a scent-matched omega. We’d searched for years without finding her. All we needed was a political match that we could support as a strong queen.”

I tried to pull my legs up as a shield, though the cast made it highly uncomfortable. What was he saying? Did he have regrets now that I was here? Or maybe he still didn’t think I’d make for a strong queen. I doubted it, too, but it felt terrible to hear it from one of my scent matches, even the one that was always the most skeptical.

He took in my posture and gusted out a sigh. “I knew I’d fuck this up,” he muttered. He shifted his weight so he was on his knees before me and tilted his head, deliberately baring his throat. My mouth dropped open in utter shock. “What I’m trying to say is that I was wrong. I was wrong about everything . I have been monumentally selfish, and I’m sorry, Lark. Please hear me out before you choose to dismiss me as your mate.”

That wasn’t a pose of trust; it was submission. Something an omega rarely saw from an alpha, ever. Marius had such a dominant alpha presence too… just seeing him this way boggled my mind. He maintained his deference as he continued, “I sensed that you were mine when we met as children. It wasn’t so intense back then. I just wanted to be your friend, to be close to you and protect you if you needed it.”

“I remember,” I murmured.

He rumbled low in his throat. “I don’t, not really, just how right it’d felt to be by your side. You were my p’nixie, the most unique omega who’d ever visited here. Then you never came back…then word reached us of your death. I was in a practice spar with Theodred when Mother read the letter. Her sudden grief at losing a child hit their pack bond, and then his famed self-control slipped for one moment and he hit me with his full strength.” He ran a finger over the silvery scar crossing his face. “I came a hairsbreadth from death and returned with this. The best team of healers and human doctors around restored the shape of my face, but my disfigurement and damaged eye were the trade-off.”

“I see,” I said faintly, swallowing a secondhand sense of guilt. I hadn’t realized I was involved, even this indirectly, with his training accident. I wondered if he resented Theodred for the damage. “Which eye?”

I wasn’t too surprised when he tapped below his right eye. The angle of the scar crossed that socket. It was probably a miracle he still had it at all.

“That is my greatest weakness. If I am to continue as your protector, you mustn’t tell a soul. Theodred kept me as his apprentice and vowed to correct his mistake, which meant extensive extra training to hide how off-balance I was.” He sighed heavily. “I took to it with a vengeance. I got out of my infirmary bed a different boy, an angry one. I hated the world and everyone in it, and most of the fae in the stars too, including you. Especially you. My disfigurement was the constant reminder of your death. It wasn’t fair… Other kelpies never had to know the pain of losing their fated mate so young.”

My heart hurt for him, and tears pricked my eyes. He spoke from a place of deep pain, dredging the depths of who he was at this point. “Marius…”

He shook his head, remaining fixedly in his submissive pose. “My beast never believed in your death. I began fighting with it, furious that it, too, had turned on me. It urged me to leave my life behind and find you. The older I became, the stronger the urges were, until it began to take over and force my body in the right direction. No other female has ever been enough to dissuade it. It has wanted you and only you. My p’nixie . Kauz named it, like I have some split personality. It is a he now and answers to Niall. He only seems to like two fae, Kauz and you.”

Stars, this poor male. “Niall,” I repeated, mostly to myself. Something told me I would need that name.

His eyes began to dilate. “Don’t call him. He’s already too eager,” he growled. “He recognized you when I did not. He—I…am still so fucking proud you perfumed for me. As if some part of you still knew who your kelpie is. Even though I’ve been an ass to you since. My eyes told me you were not my p’nixie, but some frail imposter. I worried my instincts would lead me to breaking you if I allowed Niall any control. So, I tried to scare you away from me on the magirail ride here. If you didn’t touch me or talk to me, I could keep him in check. I only held him back by hurting you…”

Oh, so all that unfriendly posturing was for a reason. Marius gritted his teeth, his presence full of fury, though I had the sense it was all self-directed. My inner omega urged for me to go to him, as he was so clearly struggling. But he wasn’t done talking yet.

“And when he finally seized control, all he wanted was to fall down at your feet. To be claimed. To be your kelpie. I have fought myself for years when I could’ve been working with my instincts, and I will never outlive how sorry that makes me feel.”

He took a ragged breath. As he spoke, he grew increasingly upset, and his pheromones soured, rot lacing his green scent. “I failed at being your protector from the moment I accepted your false death, so…I throw myself on your mercy. I do not deserve to be your mate. I’m sorry I did not rescue you. I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I blamed you for your reactions to your abuser. I’m?—”

Letting the blanket cushion my landing, I slid out of the armchair and onto my knees. I couldn’t take it anymore. I flung my arms around him, hugging the hard lines of his torso, and kissed his exposed throat. My lips landed right next to the parallel impression of closed gills I only recognized because I had them now, too.

He sucked in and looked at me with something like disbelief. “I’m not done,” he said gruffly.

“You are,” I assured him, reaching up to touch his face and the shadow of stubble gracing his cheek. My thumb brushed the dense end of his scar where the skin pulled taut. “How could I blame you for being an angry, lost kid? I forgive you, Marius. Maybe you won’t feel so feral if you don’t have to war with yourself anymore.”

He shuttered his eyelids over those predatory eyes and banded his arms around me. Nosing into my hair, he took a hitching breath. Then another. I was the one who cried, a couple tears spilling down my face as he released his grief one small sob at a time.

“I’ve been loyal,” he mumbled. “I’ve waited for you.”

“I know,” I whispered back.

“If we were parted again, I would tear the world apart to get you back. No force short of death could stop me. I swear it.”

I rubbed his back, trying to soothe him even though any purr I attempted to make got choked in my throat. “You won’t have to, stars willing.”

“I won’t war with Niall anymore. He’s right. I am yours.” His voice rose to a growl. “I want you to start the kelpie bond soon, p’nixie. Sink those little fangs in me.”

My breath caught. He couldn’t mean he wanted it right now. The rawness of how he felt meant he probably wasn’t thinking straight about his one permanent bond. “I will. But I also want more of the Marius I saw in my forgotten memories. My best friend,” I said.

He sighed and scented me again. “I can’t promise I know who that boy is anymore.”

“Maybe I can help you figure it out. And by the way, you’re not disfigured. I think you’re a handsome beast, especially when you smile.”

By the way he stilled, I figured that was the wrong thing to say about his scar. He released me from the hard grip of his arms to cup my face with both his callused hands. The feral side had risen in him, and it growled “ mine ” before grabbing a fistful of my hair and slanting a possessive kiss over my mouth.

He kissed me harder until I parted my lips and tasted his mint and waterlilies on my tongue. The pressure relented, and he stroked his fingers through my hair, petting it as he slowed to leisurely explore my mouth. His other hand wavered, uncertain, before closing around my hip.

Stars, he was as untouched as I was. I didn’t really know where to put my hands either, but they ended up on his chest, feeling the ridges of muscle through his shirt. We kissed all the while, until he gasped from the brush of my fingertips on his skin. I’d inched up the hem to expose a bit of his belly and the hard V leading to his groin, and even a little tease had coaxed out a tremble.

Maybe he’s a little touch starved too.

“Touch me,” he demanded in an insistent whisper. “I need you.”

I was starting to explore his body with my fingertips when there was an insistent knock on the door. “Marius, what the fuck,” Fal said through it, speaking Serian. “Your emotions have been going crazy over the pack bond. Why haven’t you been responding? What’s going on?”

The kelpie took a deep breath and released it in a frustrated groan. “It’s like we’re back on that fucking train,” he muttered. He got up and opened the door, switching languages as he said, “Everything’s fine.”

Fal scented the air before spotting me. He blew me a kiss with a flourish of his hand. “You took Lark to the book nerd loft. That didn’t take long,” he remarked.

“I’d prefer to have her here rather than anywhere near court.”

“Indeed.”

“She forgave me.” He sounded like he was in a daze.

Fal smirked. “Oh. That explains why I thought you might be dying. You were apologizing .”

I started to fidget and glance around, feeling weird about eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Shut the fuck up,” Marius grumbled.

“She’s far too sweet. I would’ve drawn out your suffering a lot longer,” the dark elf remarked.

Marius sighed tensely. “She said she wants the old me back. The one she was friends with before…everything,” the kelpie said with a vague wave of his hand. It seemed that request was going to weigh on him.

Fal glanced in my direction, something like appreciation in the way he nodded toward me. “Hmm, a complete personality change from being perpetually unkind. Think you can handle it?” he challenged.

The kelpie began to snarl.

“What are you two talking about?” I interjected to cover for myself and also to hopefully stop another aggressive encounter between them.

As always, Fal had a quick, smooth nonanswer. “I’m wondering if I’ll be labeled a book nerd for staying with you here. Most of the time, I’m not even allowed through the door. I talk too much, allegedly.” He rolled his eyes and rattled his earrings with a toss of his hair. “Shall I pluck you from this nest and return you to yours, mo stór ?”