Page 47

Tears rolled down his face without permission. “She was toxic. That love was survival—not real…not this.”

He reached for her hand. She didn’t pull away.

“This right here? With you?” His voice cracked, barely making it past his throat. “This feels like peace…like home…like shit I thought only existed in dreams.”

Aku’s heart thudded loud in her chest. She felt it in her ribs, in her knees…in the way her hands trembled at her sides.

This man she loved so loudly and so quickly, it scared her…

and not because he was wild, or street, or rough around the edges.

But because when she looked at Malik, she saw every version of herself reflected back - the soft parts, the woman she wanted to be, the girl she thought she lost when she lost Devin.

“Then why you never said that before?” she whispered in that syrupy sweet tone she’d got from her mama.

Malik looked away, jaw clenched tight. His next breath sounded like it hurt. “’Cause I ain’t think I deserved you…still don’t.”

His voice broke again. “You so fuckin’ bright, baby…and I’m—” He swiped his hand down his face, almost like he was trying to erase the vulnerability. “I’m just some nigga from Crescent tryna keep his heart from bleeding out all over the sidewalk.”

That hit her in a place nothing ever had.

Aku stepped into him without thinking. She just moved. Her body already knew where it was supposed to be. Her thumb brushed his cheek where a tear had snuck down, quiet and angry.

That’s what she loved about him.

He wasn’t cold. He wasn’t numb. He felt everything, even when it nearly killed him.

“I don’t care where you from,” she whispered, eyes locked on his. “I care where we goin’.”

Aku didn’t just love light.

She never had.

She was raised on love that showed up. Love that hollered, and prayed, and stayed no matter what. Love that tucked you in even when it was tired. Love that made a plate and cussed you out if you forgot where you came from.

That’s how she loved now…with her whole chest, with her blood, with everything that made her woman enough to stand in the storm and still offer somebody else her umbrella.

He wasn’t just a chapter in her life. He was the plot twist, the underlined paragraph, the shit that made the story real…the italics in her head.

He was rough, yeah. Good thing her love was made to reach deep places. She could love his wounds without bleeding out herself…could hold his hurt without letting it swallow her whole.

That’s what made this time different. It wasn’t one-sided or a situation where one needed to change to fit the other. This love was falling, crashing into the dirt not giving a damn as long as the person you love fell with you. A shower never hurt nobody.

That’s what made it theirs.

When he looked at her like he didn’t understand, how someone like her could stand by someone like him…she didn’t flinch, she stood taller.

“You’re not just some nigga from Crescent,” she murmured, pressing her forehead to his. “You’re mine, and I don’t love broken pieces. I love the whole you. Give me your pain and I’ll shower you with my pleasure, Black man.”

He kissed her forehead, then her cheek. Greedy and needy - just held her there, both of them breathing in, that quiet between healing and acceptance.

“Malik?” she asked after a long pause.

“Yea?”

“How’d the meeting go?”

He laughed, bitter and dry. “It was bullshit. All they cared about was money. Wanted to change everything...didn’t feel right.”

She smirked. “I might know a guy who knows a guy.”

He raised a brow. “Who?”

“Bu,” she said, a slick grin tugging at the corner of her mouth.

Malik blinked. “Oh, word?” He sniffed.

She stepped back, slowly. “Yup. But first, you gotta answer for that fight with my Daddy.”

Before he could respond, she shoved him playfully. “I can’t believe you fought my Daddy…”

“Man, he swung first!”

“I don’t care. Now you gotta fight me.”

Malik backed up with his hands raised. “I don’t hit women.”

“Oh, you not gon’ need to. I’m ‘bout to beat yo’ ass with this love.”

He caught her as she lunged toward him, lips crashing into his as they both stumbled backward into the living room. The tension melted into laughter and low moans. She straddled him on the couch, kissed his eyelids, his jaw, his neck.

“You know this mean we forever, right?” she whispered.

Malik looked up at her, eyes red but soft. “Been forever since you first told me I looked like peace.”

Show me what forever feels like,” she slurred, daring him to fuck her into oblivion.

His hands worked quickly, lifting her shirt, tapping her thigh for her stand up and pull them pants down. “Turn around…let me see that pussy.”

It was as if the days’ worry had disappeared. Aku’s stomach wasn’t queasy anymore either.

Aku obliged, shaking her ass when she touched her toes.

His rough hand rubbed across her buttery skin. “Open that pussy for me…let me see sumthin.”

Aku giggled, sucking in a deep breath. Her hands rubbed her ass before she pulled her cheeks apart. “You see it?” she asked, looking over her shoulders. “And you gon’ buy me a new lamp too,” she sassed when her eyes went to the missing lamp. Solar had cleaned all that up before they left.

“Cuh,” Malik growled. “I ain’t thinkin’ ‘bout no damn lamp when this pussy in my face like this.”

“It’s in your face but you ain’t doing nothing.”

“Tell me what to do, Mrs. Talk-a-nigga through it.”

“Eat this shit, duh…cuh.”

His head fell back laughing. “Ay, you so damn funny.”

“And what else?”

“Got a pretty ass pussy…”

“What else?” she huffed, feeling his breath against her skin. She was still bent over…still had her pussy open, ready for him.

Using his hands to keep her steady, Malik swiped his tongue up her slit slowly. He shook his head in it too. “Fuck,” he mumbled, flicking his tongue more. “If I could bottle this shit up, I would.”

“You’d sell it on the app?”

“Fuck no! I’ll kill a nigga that even tell me he dream about it.”

“Kill this pussy after you eat it like you’re starving…worship me and this pussy, Black man.”

Malik did what she said, licking and sucking on her—hungry like she said. Smacking sounds filled the room and mixed with Aku becoming more and more undone.

“You eat my pussy sooo gooooddd,” she gripped her breasts.

Dipping a finger in, Malik sucked on her clit. “Hmmm,” he praised.

Aku threw her pussy back at him, feeding it to him. “Get nasty, baby! I want you to drown in this shit!”

Malik’s dick hurt, listening to her voice.

“Ooo, yes…right there…like that.” She twirled her hips faster, pushing back on him more. Her release was right there and Malik sucked it right out of her. “Baby!” She came hard, falling forward, but he caught her before her head hit the table.

“Bring yo’ ass here,” Malik growled, pulling her busted lip into his mouth while he fumbled with his pants to release his dick. Aku hissed from the pain, but kept kissing him.

With her still in his arms, Malik flipped her around, her back on the couch. “I love you, baby,” he kissed while lining his dick up to her opening.

“I looovvve—” Aku sucked her lips into her mouth, euphoria taking over her voice.

Malik gave her slow, deep dick strokes while looking into her eyes. Meanwhile, he constantly told her how much he loves her and wants to give her that fairytale she deserves. “The world could be burning, but long as you with me…let that hoe burn.”

Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes, legs spread back, touching her shoulders. “I?—”

“Shh,” he hushed her. “Don’t talk…just let me make you feel good, baby.”

“You doooo!” Aku writhed under him.

The room smelled like sweet, nasty, love-making.

Their bodies tangled under the covers, bare skin still hot from everything they just gave each other.

The TV was on low, playing some late-night rerun that neither of them paid attention to.

Malik laid on his back, one hand behind his head, the other still resting on Aku’s thigh.

She was draped across his chest, chin on his collarbone, nails dragging light circles on his stomach like her fingers didn’t know how to sit still when she was in love.

He was quiet, but not distant. The kind of quiet that comes when your heart is full and your mouth don’t know how to hold all that truth at once.

Aku rolled onto her side, facing him. “You alright?”

Malik looked at her, eyes red but soft. “I ain’t never been better,” he said, low. “You made me feel safe…emptied me out too,” he teased.

She swallowed, lips trembling before she smiled. “Good, that was the goal.”

He cupped her cheek, running his thumb over her jaw. “You know what’s crazy?”

“What?”

“I used to think love was some shit for everybody else, some shit that passed me by. But then you showed up talkin’ shit, wearin’ them stupid ass boots in a hundred degree weather, actin’ like you wasn’t tryna love a nigga. And now…I’m ruined.”

Aku laughed a little, soft and tired. “You not ruined. You better.”

He didn’t say anything…just stared at her, eyes heavy with something deeper than lust. “I wanna give you everything…whatever makes you smile, I’m tryna be that.”

“You will.”

“I mean it though, Aku. I don’t want you to ever feel like you gotta dim anything for me to shine. I’m tryna be the type of man your Daddy wasn’t ready for, but your Mama gon’ smile at every time she see him.”

That pulled a chuckle from her. “You already fought my Daddy. What’s next?”

He smirked. “Now I gotta fight you.”

She leaned in and kissed his shoulder, then his chest, then his neck—slow, careful kisses like she was thanking each part of him for still being here, still breathing…

still choosing life. Her body slid down his, kissing the bruises gently.

Her hands moved over his skin, tracing his ribs like she was trying to learn them by heart.

Her mouth was warm, full, careful but sure. She took him in slow, pausing to let his body twitch, moan, react. Her tongue moved in circles, her lips soft as her hands anchored his hips to the mattress.

He hissed through his teeth. “Damn…you tryna kill me? Told you I was empty,” he laughed.

Her eyes locked with his, teasing. “No, just tryna remind you who the fuck I am.”

Malik’s head fell back, hands clenching the sheets. Her name tumbled out his mouth again and again, like a prayer he couldn’t stop chanting. She talked him through every stroke. Told him to let go, to stop overthinking…that she had him…and she did…all of him.

When it was over, she kissed his thigh, and crawled back up to lay across his chest again. He pulled her into his arms and whispered against her hair.

“I love you, Dorothy. I been saying that shit over and over ‘cause I gotta keep reminding myself.”

“I know,” she whispered, “I heard you.”

She laid there for a while, listening to his heartbeat. It was steady…strong. She smiled into his skin and closed her eyes.

When he was good and sleep, Aku slid out the bed an hour later, careful not to wake him.

She grabbed her robe, pulled her sweaty waves back into a loose ponytail, and padded down the hallway.

When she opened the front door, her Mama was already standing there, eyes scanning her like she used to do when Aku snuck in late from a party.

“You alone?” Aku whispered.

Solar nodded. “Your Daddy’s sleep. I left him a note, said I was gettin’ some air.”

Aku pulled her inside. “C’mon.”

They walked through the hallway in silence until they stepped into Noodle’s old room. Solar clicked on the lamp and looked around like she was stepping into a memory.

“You still keep it clean,” she said, voice low.

Aku just nodded and went straight to the drawer where she kept a stash of random toiletries and things she never used, but didn’t throw away. She grabbed the box and peeled off the wrapper.

She’d texted her Mama earlier telling her to come alone in about an hour. There was something she needed to do, but only wanted to do it with her favorite girl.

Solar blinked. “That a pregnancy test?”

Aku didn’t answer, just walked into the bathroom and closed the door.

It felt like the longest three minutes of her life.

She paced, sat on the toilet, stood up again, and splashed her face with cold water. Tried to pray but the words wouldn’t come. When the timer on her phone buzzed, she hesitated before turning it over.

Two lines.

She walked back into the room slowly, test in hand. She didn’t even say anything at first…just held it up.

Solar’s eyes welled immediately. “You pregnant?”

Aku nodded, a ghost of a smile lingering on her face.

“I don’t even know how far I am,” she whispered. “I mean, I got a feeling but?—”

Solar stood and pulled her in close, wrapping her arms around her daughter. “Oh, baby…”

Aku’s chin trembled. “Please don’t tell Daddy.”

Solar laughed through her tears. “You know I keep the best secrets.”

Aku pulled back, smiling despite the tears. “Don’t I know it.”

They sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding each other.

“I wanted to wait. I wanted things to be perfect. But nothing’s perfect.”

“No,” Solar said, brushing a curl out of her face. “But love like this? It’s real. That’s better than perfect…that boy love your dirty drawls. I see that shit all on his face.”

Aku nodded, resting her head on her Mama’s shoulder.

Her world was about to change, and somehow, she wasn’t scared.

Not anymore.