Page 56 of Faking the Pass
Merc
It was incredible to be back in Eastport Bay, sitting at the big dining table in my parents’ house, laughing with them and my brothers and their wives.
Little did they all know, they’d be seeing a lot more of me soon. I was waiting for just the right moment to drop the news.
Across from me, Jessica was telling Rosie about our epic camping trip.
“A little sisterly advice? Never, and I mean never, camp for two weeks with a two-and-a-half-year-old while pregnant.”
“Noted,” Rosie said and laughed. “We’re pretty far from that right now. Presley and I have to wait for filming on Miss Marjoribanks to wrap before we can even start trying.”
Seated next to her, Pres wrapped an arm around his wife’s shoulder and leaned in, “I’ve told her we can practice as much as she wants until then. It’s been added to our contract.”
“Contract?” Jess asked, confused.
Rosie shot him a warning glance and poked his side.
“He’s joking.”
Unrepentant, he went on teasing her. “I think we’re up to amendment number three-hundred-seventy now. Want to hear what three-sixty-nine was?”
I was happy for him—really happy. I’d never seen him so carefree and content.
He and Wilder were both poster-boys for the whole wife-and-kids thing.
It just wasn’t for me.
I’d gotten close once, but that hadn’t worked out, and really it had been for the best.
What more could a guy want than money, fame, and unlimited opportunity with women?
“Hold you?” a little voice said, and I looked down to see my nephew Theo’s big green eyes and his chubby little hands stretching up to me.
“Want me to hold you?” I asked, and he showed me his cute little baby teeth, squeezing his eyes tight in a heart-melting grin.
“Well, come here then, little man.” I reached down and pulled the kid onto my lap.
He immediately grabbed my spoon and began digging into the homemade banana pudding in front of me. I hadn’t gotten the chance to start eating it yet.
Jess fussed at him. “Theo, no. That’s not yours. That’s Uncle Merc’s.”
“It’s okay,” I told her. “The boy knows what he wants, and he’s going for it. He’s kinda my hero honestly. I was trying to figure out a way I could eat everyone else’s desserts. He just beat me to it.”
When I laughed along with the rest of my family, Theo turned his head to look at me, the loaded spoon half-in half-out of his mouth.
A gooey lump of pudding landed on my shirt with a squelch.
“Ohhhh noooo,” Theo said dramatically.
Jessica was out of her chair and on her way to my side of the table. “That’s it, mister. You come sit with Mommy.”
“Sorry, Uncle Merc,” she added. “Send us the dry cleaning bill.”
“Hang around much longer, and you’ll need to start a tab,” Wilder advised. “My son’s an enthusiastic eater—not a neat one.”
“Like father, like son,” Dylan said and pointed to Wilder’s chest.
When our oldest brother dipped his head to look for a food stain, Dylan snagged his pudding bowl and pulled it toward himself.
“Made ya look,” he said and cackled before digging into Wilder’s dessert.
Jessica reached for Theo, intending to take him, but he squirmed and shook his head, kicking his short legs.
“Nooooooo. Unk Merc.”
“It’s fine. Let him sit with me,” I urged her. “We’ve got a lot of guy stuff to talk about. And I don’t get the chance to spoil babies that often… but hopefully I will soon.”
Jessica’s eyes went wide at my cryptic words, and I grinned. It felt like the right time to tell everyone.
With my free hand, I tapped my butter knife against my water glass.
“I have an announcement.”
“Oh my God, are you having a baby?” Jess gasped.
“You knocked somebody up?” Dylan asked, jumping to the same conclusion.
“It was bound to happen,” Pres said.
My jaw dropped, and I looked around. “If you assholes will stop lobbing false accusations for a minute, I’ll tell you what’s actually going on.”
There was laughter all around.
“So you know I put in for free agency.”
Several heads nodded. My brothers all leaned forward.
“I got a call this morning from…”
I deliberately paused just to torture them.
“Are you waiting for a fucking drumroll?” Presley asked.
Dylan started drumming the tabletop with his knife and fork.
Smiling widely, I finally finished the sentence. “... The Superbowl champion New England Nauticals. I said yes.”
Screams erupted throughout the room, and my family members jumped up from their chairs and started hugging each other. Mom was crying.
Then everyone moved toward me.
I still had Theo in my lap so I couldn’t get up. Confused by the commotion, he started crying, and Jessica reached for him.
This time, he reached back for her, and she took him from me, dancing around and bouncing him on her hip. “Yay Uncle Merc! Yay Uncle Merc!”
I stood and accepted the dogpile hug from the rest of them.
“You’ve known all day, and didn’t tell us, you bastard?” Presley said.
I laughed and grabbed his extended hand. “What can I say? I like surprises.”
Mostly being on the receiving end, but surprising my family was fun too—especially when it was the very best kind of good news.
After years of bouncing from one team to the next and then living on the complete opposite coast, I was coming home.
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