Page 73 of Estranged Heart

A chuckle tickles the back of my throat, and when she leaves I pull my phone from my pocket and scroll to Silas’s name.

Me: Can’t wait to catch you from falling next weekend.

Silas: You’ll probably be falling with me.

Me: No. I’ll be wearing shoes. You’ll be braving the skates alone.

Silas: You say that now. Looking forward to changing your mind.

And there’s no doubt in my mind that he will. There’s a huge track record that would certainly back up these thoughts too.

I’m wide awake when I arrive home from work, so I fry up some chicken flautas then take a long hot shower after dinner. Struggling to shut my mind off, I step out of the tub, wrap a towel around me, and turn some music on full blast after connecting my phone to a speaker attached to the towel holder. I reach for my toothbrush and that’s when I see it—a blue and white variegated washcloth made of yarn.

A flutter passes through the left side of my chest and I lift it in my hand. It smells of flowers when I bring it to my nose. Flowers and him. Inhaling deeper, I shove my face further into the soft material, and closing my eyes, I picture him standing right next to me in my bathroom. There’s no tightening in my chest and I can’t help but lean more into the idea. I allow the scene to play in my head, of him naked and trying to share my towel, wearing one of his crooked smiles.

I open my eyes and an uneasy feeling washes over me. At first it was hard to bring him here, but now when I imagine it, I can’t handle it not being real. I place the washcloth back on the counter next to Landon’s white soap dish. Silas’s stuff being here doesn’t replace Landon’s or make it fade away. There’s a place for both.

Teeth brushed, I wash my face, and as I’m walking to bed my phone buzzes. I swipe it off my coffee table and head to the couch, embracing the smile that comes when I read over the message.

Silas:Sleeping?

Me: Not yet. Having trouble?

Silas: Yeah. A little. I think I’m on a sugar high.

Laughter bubbles out of me and I hit the call button. It only takes two rings for him to answer.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Sunshine.”

His breaths shake a little. “Hey. Whatcha doing?”

“Nothing really. Just got out of the shower, you?” I lay back on the large fluffy cushions. The cool suede rubbing over my back reminds me I’m only wearing a towel.

“Same. I’m all dry and warm under the covers now. Very naked too.”

“Oh yeah?” I chuckle, stretching out my legs. “No late-night reading or watching a horror movie?”

“No. I don’t usually read or watch scary movies before bed. They keep me up longer because I usually can’t stop thinking about them.”

“I see. What helps you sleep then?” I ask, holding the phone tighter to my ear.

“Listening to music, working out, and . . .” He doesn’t finish, forcing my imagination to run wild.

“And?”

“Orgasms,” he says almost too quietly.

Something like lava travels under my skin. “How do you usually get one?”

“Fucking my hand or between the fold of a pillow.”

Arousal curls inside me and I open my towel. I stroke my cock, licking my lips while wondering whether I’m ready to hear hismoans and cries throughout my house. Letting my curiosity run its course, I place my phone on speaker and lay it next to me.

“Do you make the same sounds alone as you do with me?”

“Want to find out?”