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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

M y blood pounds triple time. Tingles and bursts of heat break out in the darkest and most awkward folds and crevices, all around my body. A squirm in my panties is more than I can hold back. Trying to keep my body under control is making my head buzz ad blur with confusion.

Before I can stop myself, I let out, “Yes.” And I should stop there. “I am having feelings for you.” Now I’ve gone too far. But I can’t stop myself “All of you.” I shake my head, like I’ve made the dumbest mistake. “I have strong feelings for all three of you, and now I suppose you’re going to leverage that against me.”

He moves along the couch, nearer to me. Our knees are almost touching.

“What makes you think we’re against you, why do you assume that?”

“Well, let’s see. I got this funny notion from the fact that you seem to have kidnapped me. And then you kept me inside. Oh, and the cable ties on my wrists.” I look at him, “Little things like that.”

“You don’t know what you don’t know.”

“So here’s something I do know, I’ve confessed to having feelings for you.”

“And the other two.”

“But I’m not getting anything back from you.”

“Meaning?”

Hesitant, I search his face before I ask, “Do you have feelings for me?”

Now it’s out there, I feel an awful tension, waiting to hear what the Mastermind will say. And about what the Warrior will think if he steps back in here right now. Our talk in the bedroom was awkward and uncomfortable and I felt bad at the end.

The Mastermind jumps up and springs away like he’s been burned.

“This is fucking unbearable.” This is the most emotional I’ve seen him. “I can’t wait for you to get your fucking memory back.”

He stamps into one of the bedrooms and slams the door shut behind him.

A few minutes later, the Warrior bursts in through the front door. His eyes dart around the room, searching. Then they fix on me and his face reddens. He shouts,

“You cannot fucking leave her alone.” He kick the front door shut behind him, then stays rooted to the spot, glowering at me. He yells again, “Not under any circumstance. Get out here.”

The hot blast of mistrust stings and cuts me deep inside.

Slowly, the Mastermind opens the door to his room. At the same time, the front door opens behind the Warrior. He’s startled and a hand goes to his hip as he spins. The Emperor almost walks into him and demands, “What the hell is going on?”

“Boy genius left the package unattended.”

“She was driving me nuts,” the Mastermind turns is hands, palms up.

“Oh,” the Emperor thunders, “Well, that’s alright then.”

“Yeah,” the Warrior’s head snaps round and he barks, “If she got to you, shook you up and got on your nerves, then all bets are off.”

“Of course,” the Emperor shuts the door behind him. “We can’t have anything make our star hacker’s little fee-fees sore, can we?”

“The fuck,”with his face reddening, the Mastermind’s chin flattens. “It was two minutes.”

“Mm,” the Emperor says, “And how long did it take her to squeeze out of the house this morning? Anyone remember?” His eyes narrow at the Mastermind. “In case you’ve lost your fucking memory, too, Einstein, she’s more resourceful than a jungle cat, and she has the willpower of a herd of charging bison.” He glowers. “Just for a handy aide memoire .”

“Have you lost your memory?” the Warrior says, “Or only your fucking mind?”

“Alright, alright,” the Mastermind backs up an inch and turns his palms forward.

“Enough,” the Emperor snaps. “We’re taking her to the house.”

There’s a heavy pause. Quietly, the Mastermind says, “The old house?”

A shiver trickles down my spine and I don’t even know why.

“The new house,” The Emperor tells him. “Let’s hope that’s enough to shake something loose in her head.”

Tilting his head, the Mastermind says, “We could have taken her there in the first place.”

“Yeah, boy genius,” the warrior’s lip curls. “Nobody would have thought of looking for us there.”

“Okay,” the Mastermind’s eyebrows go up and he sighs. “Let’s get on and get it done.”

I stand. “If you’re all through talking about me like I’m not here, are you going to tie me up again?”

I stick out my wrists defiantly, hoping they’ll all be shamed into leaving my hands free. It nearly works, too. Until the Warrior slings a sideways look at both of the others. Then he says, “Pack an overnight bag. Just in case.”

“Oh, I’ll be careful to pick a few stylish wardrobe items.”

“I was meaning a toothbrush.”

I flounce to my room as he draws a heavy-duty cable tie out of his pocket.

Before we set off, there was talk of putting me in the box at the rear, but the Emperor’s decree was that I should be able to see the road, the driveway, and the house.

I ask, “Where are we going?”

From the driving seat, the Emperor lets out a dry chuckle. “You’ll see. I’m really hoping you’ll recognize the place.”

The warrior says, “We’re taking big risks, going there.”

“It’s a risk, us going anywhere,” the sullen Mastermind chimes in.

Shaking his head, the Emperor says, “We were taking bigger risks sitting around with our fingers up our asses while our world is getting swallowed up in wildfires out there.” He turns to look over his shoulder. “If we don’t get back in control of things and fast, there’s not going to be anything left.”

Black tinted windows go all around the passenger part of the Escalade. I’m sat in the far back seat, between Mastermind and the Warrior. We drive down, off the mountain, then wind through townships and agricultural suburbs for a while, before we turn up another incline.

As we start up the steep mountain road, the Emperor says, “While I drove back from dropping the doc, I made a call.”

Mastermind’s eyes flash and a trace of a smile pulls at his lips.

Warrior stiffens. “You mean…”

“Yup,” the Emperor tips the mirror to look back at us. “She said she’ll meet us at the house.”

“Who?” I look between the three men.

“You’ll soon see.” The Emperor moves the mirror back to the driving position as he negotiates a series of twists in the road. He calls back, “Looking familiar? See anything you recognize yet?”

“Me?” I say, “Not so far.”

After some time ascending, we pull off the road between two stone gateposts and up a long, wide drive. We rise up to a turn and then, in front of us is a wide, sleek, modern house.

Graceful proportions, and natural wood and stone finishes make it seem like it belongs in the wooded landscape.

We park in the garage and enter the kitchen from there. The house is as gorgeous on the inside as it is from the drive.

The Warrior spreads his arms open in the kitchen. “Remember this?”

I shake my head. The Mastermind leads me upstairs to a sumptuous bedroom suite. As I peer into the fully tiled shower and bathroom, with a spa bath and movie-star mirror, he says, “Recognize it now?”

“Should I?”

His disappointment is obvious. “You put enough time and money into building it.”

“I built this?”

“You had an architect and a project manager on site, but you pretty much ran the building crews yourself.” His eyebrows steeple. “You spent the best part of a year on it. You threw a huge Christmas party as a housewarming.” He sniffs a long, slow breath in. “This is your baby,” he blinks. “So to speak.”

I’m shaking my head. How could I have done this? But, even more, how could I have forgotten?

He gives me time to look around, so I explore the closets and rifle a few drawers. Nothing seems familiar to me, though. When I shrug, he leads me back downstairs.

A woman is entering through the front doorway. A woman with the face and eyes of an ice queen. She obviously knows me. I can’t tell for certain whether the icicles around my heart are from recognizing her or if they’re just a simple reaction to the chill in her stare.

The Mastermind quickens his step and embraces her. As he does, he seems to drop a couple of years. His eyes look younger.

The Warrior waits his turn for a hug. She’s polite, but warm.

The Emperor nods to her and says, “Ester.”

She returns his nod. Then she looks in my face.

“Darling,” she says, “You do look pale.”She asks the men, “Has she been eating alright? Have you been feeding her properly?”

Her eyes slip to the Mastermind. “Upstairs? Nothing?”

His mouth thins. “If there was anything, I didn’t see it.”

She asks me, “You don’t see anything here at all that you recognize? Nobody and nothing?”

I shake my head.

To the Mastermind she says, “She didn’t even want to change into her own clothes?” His lips press together as his head turns, once.

She steps toward me and her voice softens into a lull of compassion. “You poor thing. I hope you’re not trapped in there too long.” Then to the men, “Take her to the old house.”

Even though I have no idea what she’s talking about, my stomach drops through the floor as she says the words.

“If that doesn’t rouse her, nothing will.”

My knee shakes.

“Meanwhile,” the Mastermind says, “while we try that. And while we try everything else–” he steps toward her.

“Oh, no.” She raises her hand, palm out. Firm. Then points a finger. “Absolutely not. After today, I’m heading straight back to Italy. I’ve done my time in the trenches, thank you very much.”

“What about your contacts?” the Warrior implores her. “Chicago, for instance.”

“Seriously? You want me to go begging?” Her eyes narrow and her lips thin. “I know exactly how many favors I have left that I can call, and I may well need every one of them for my own skin. No. I’ve done what I can, but this is not my mess.”

The Emperor draws breath to speak but her eyes cut to him. His chest falls. Almost as quietly as a breath, she asks him, “Have I made myself clear?”

When she takes my hand, I’m completely surprised and disarmed by her warmth and tenderness. “You, my darling, you can come to me. Now, tomorrow, any time. Whether you know me or not. La mia casa è la tua casa .”

She shoots back a look across the three men. “But I won’t stay in the States. Not after tonight.”