Page 23 of Don’t Love the Boy Next Door (Hotties Next Door #2)

Chapter Twenty

Ethan

I drop my gym bag on the floor and pull the fridge open for some water.

After gulping half the bottle down, I plunk down on the kitchen chair.

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what happened last night.

Phoenix didn’t even give me the chance to explain why I pretended to be someone else online.

At school today, she avoided me like the plague.

She must have come to school right before first bell and skipped history class so she wouldn’t have to look at me.

And she and Katie weren’t in the cafeteria during lunch.

I feel really bad about the whole thing. Pretending to be someone else online wasn’t cool. But at the same time, I’m happy I did it. We had a lot of fun chatting and playing together. She actually talked to me, unlike real life.

Still, it wasn’t right, and she hadn’t given me the chance to explain. Apologizing doesn’t seem to be enough. But maybe I deserve this.

I don’t know why it’s so important for her to forgive me. She was my enemy. But things were looking good between us before I told her the truth. Was it a mistake to be honest with her? No, I don’t regret that.

Maybe we’ll never move past this.

“You look like crap,” Eric says as he walks into the kitchen, guitar in hand. He must have been practicing in the basement. At least one of us is in a good enough mood to jam. I’m so relieved we don’t have band practice today because I would pretty much drag us all down.

Why do I care so much?

Eric flops down next to me. “What’s up?” He studies my face. “Does this have anything to do with Phoenix? Was she that mad at you?”

I nod. After she stormed into her house, I entered mine and locked myself in my room. Didn’t want to talk to anyone. I just sat there, replaying it over and over in my head, wondering if I should have gone about it differently.

“She looked like she wanted to kill me,” I tell him.

He blows air from his cheeks. “You expected this. I mean, you can’t really blame her.”

“She didn’t even give me a chance to explain. And I couldn’t catch her today. I’d text her to meet me so we could talk, but I’m pretty sure she blocked my number. She deleted all my comments on her videos and removed me from her friend list on games.”

He doesn’t say anything as he plays with his guitar strap. Then he says, “That’s rough. Maybe she needs some time.”

I shake my head. “Phoenix doesn’t forgive that easily. I hurt her and I doubt she’s ever going to talk to me again.” I sit back. “And I don’t even know why I care so much. If she wants to hate me, let her hate me. But…” I shake my head again.

“You care because you don’t like hurting people.”

I don’t say anything as I think it over. That might be true, but there’s something else there, something I don’t really understand.

I get to my feet. “I’m going for a run.”

I’m a bit tired from football practice, but I push myself because I don’t know what else to do.

I don’t want to think about her all the time, to be so distracted that I keep messing up the things that matter to me.

Like practice this afternoon. Coach was hard on me, but he had a good reason.

I sucked, let the entire team down. And it’s weird because I’ve never messed up by practice because of a girl.

Even when Charlotte and I fought, I never brought that with me to football.

I pass Katie’s house and stop in my tracks as I glance at her bedroom window. The shade is shut. Peering into the other windows, I can’t find either girl. Maybe that’s for the best. If Phoenix caught me looking into the house, she’d call me a creep and stalker.

I continue my run, the sweat dripping down my face.

I should probably take it easy, give my body a chance to recover after practice, but I don’t.

I push harder until my legs are on fire and beg me to stop.

Bending over, I try to catch my breath, but my lungs feel like stone as I try to yank in some oxygen.

I need to forget about her and pretend none of this happened. Because if I don’t, I might mess up the chance to follow my dreams.

But as I run back home, I can’t let it go. Just can’t. She deserves an explanation. Then she can be done with me for good.

As I reach my front door, my phone rings with a video call from Charlotte. I’m not really in the mood to talk to her, but I can’t ignore her, either. We’ve been texting a lot, and I feel close to her again.

“Hey,” I say.

She squints at me, then makes a disgusted face. “You’re all sweaty.”

I give her an empty smile. “Went for a run. What’s up?”

She shrugs, smiling that smile that I usually love. Now I just feel…nothing. “Was thinking about you. I really miss you.”

“Really?”

She nods, her smile growing wide. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot. Like every second of every day.”

A pang of guilt attacks me. Truth is, I haven’t been thinking about her much. Been too busy worrying about Phoenix.

“Yeah?” I say.

She laughs. “Why are you so quiet?”

“I’m not. Just got a lot on my mind.”

She lifts a brow. “Like me?”

“Uh…”

She giggles. “Of course you do. So I thought about it a lot. Like, I really miss you and it’s stupid that we broke up because you moved away.”

I drop down on the grass before my house. “I thought that was what you wanted.”

She tilts her head to the side, eyes narrowed as she thinks. “I know, but it was stupid. I mean, we could have at least tried long distance.”

I blink at her. “What?”

She rolls her eyes. “I want to try to date long distance. Are you sure you’re okay?”

It feels like the world is shifting on its axis. “You want to get back together?”

She nods enthusiastically, another bright smile on her face. “Of course I do! I don’t think I’ve stopped loving you.” She frowns. “Don’t you feel the same?”

My gaze leaves hers. Do I? I’ve been waiting for this moment. But now that it’s come…

I glance at the house next door. All shades are shut, like Phoenix is locking me out.

“Ethan? Hello? Did the video freeze?”

I turn back to Charlotte. Her eyes brighten again. “So what do you say, boyfriend? Excited to try this long distance thing?”

I avert my eyes again. I should be excited. I should be dancing around the planet. Cheering at the top of my lungs. But I’m not. Instead, I keep looking at the house next door, hoping and wishing a certain girl who isn’t Charlotte would come to the window. But of course that doesn’t happen.

“Ethan? What’s wrong with you?”

I don’t know, honestly, but one thing I do know—my feelings for Charlotte. Just a few weeks ago, I would have cried for joy at the chance of getting back together with the girl who used to mean everything to me. Now…now I feel nothing.

“Ethan!”

I snap my gaze to her. “No.”

“No what?”

I swallow the lump in my throat. “I don’t want to get back together with you.”

Her mouth drops. “Excuse me?”

I swallow again, but it feels like there’s a rock lodged inside. “I don’t love you anymore.”

Her eyes flame. “How can you say that to me?”

“What do you want me to do? Pretend I love you? That would only hurt you.”

“It’s that girl, isn’t it? That girl from the band.”

I tear at my hair. “I told you she’s just a friend.”

“But there is someone else.”

My mouth opens and closes to refute, but I can’t get the words out. And I can’t stop myself from peering toward the house next door.

“I’m really sorry, Charlotte,” I say. “I thought this was what I wanted, but it’s not. And I’m very sorry to hurt you like this.”

She sighs, her shoulders sagging. “No, I’m sorry for getting mad at you. I mean, you’re all the way there and I’m here. Chances are we wouldn’t have worked out, anyway.”

“Can we still be friends?”

“Sure. Good luck with your game on Friday.”

I smile. “Thanks.”

She disconnects the call and I stare at the spot before me. I can’t believe I don’t feel anything other than friendship for Charlotte. I actually refused her after wanting to get back together for so long.

And why can’t my eyes stop springing toward next door?