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CHAPTER NINETEEN

Christy

The last few days have been a blur. If I’m not with Evan, I’m thinking about him or watching him on TV. I know we’re moving faster than we talked about, but we can’t help ourselves. The more I thought about it, the more I thought, Why fight it? If we both feel this way and want to be together, then we should be.

Tonight is the concert, and I’m beyond excited about not only seeing Zach Bryan, but also having a date night with just Evan.

He’s been great with Nolan, but I want some adult time too.

I exit my bedroom with Evan still asleep in bed and laugh when I walk out to the living room to see all the blankets and pillows lying on the floor. I was surprised when Evan suggested to Nolan that they should have a sleepover, but what I didn’t expect was the fort to be made in my living room, using every single blanket and sheet I had in my house.

The two of them lay on the floor, watching a movie under the fortress Evan had built until Nolan fell asleep and Evan carried him to bed.

As Nolan’s night was ending, mine was just beginning.

The way that man makes me feel is something I can’t describe. Happiness, pure joy, heaven—none of it explains the way I feel when I’m in his arms.

I make a pot of coffee and drink some water while watching the sunrise, taking this moment to really appreciate the direction my life is going right now.

The coffeepot dings, so I reach for a mug and hear the sound of bare feet heading my way.

As I pour the one item that helps me be a better mom, Evan wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my neck.

“Good morning,” he says breathily, making my chest tighten just from the sound of his voice.

I lean back into his touch. “Good morning. How did you sleep?”

“Much better once I was off that floor and inside you.” He places lingering kisses around my shoulder.

“Glad I could be of assistance,” I tease, making him laugh.

“How much time do we have until Nolan wakes up?” He moves my tank top strap down my arm.

I chuckle and pull it back up. “Nice try. He’ll be up any minute. Why I was blessed with a kid who doesn’t sleep in, I’ll never understand.” I hear Nolan’s bedroom door open and laugh. “Yep, right on cue.”

“I thought we were sleeping on the floor,” Nolan says in a sleepy, whiny tone.

Evan leans down to be closer to Nolan’s size. “We did for a little bit, but I didn’t want you waking up with a sore shoulder or anything.” He rubs Nolan’s shoulder like he’s a trainer. “You have a game today, and we’re going to throw beforehand, right?”

Nolan jumps up in excitement when he remembers their conversation from last night. “Oh yeah. Let me get my glove!”

He turns to run to his room, but I stop him.

“Hey, turbo man, chill,” I tease. “It’s only seven in the morning. Let us wake up and get our day going. Go watch some Wild Kratts .”

Nolan looks at Evan to see if he’ll say differently.

Evan holds up his fist to give him knucks. “We’ve got time. Go watch your show.”

Nolan agrees and walks to the living room to curl up under all the blankets that are still there.

After we’re all ready, we head to the park where Nolan’s Little League games are. We’re a few minutes early so Nolan and Evan can throw the baseball around.

I sit and relax on a park bench a few feet away and watch Evan teach Nolan to throw a ball properly. His interactions with Nolan surprise me a little bit. I know he has nephews, but I also know he’s pretty much been on the road since they were born, so it’s not like he was around much. His level of comfort with Nolan is something I rarely see in men, unless they are the kid’s father.

Evan teaches him about stretching, warming up, arm angle, and how to move your body with your throw. When Nolan throws the ball and hits Evan directly in the glove, he runs over to me.

“Did you see that, Mommy?”

I give him a big smile. “I did! Great job!”

With every throw, Nolan gets better, and the smile on Evan’s face grows bigger.

“Okay, bud.” Evan catches the ball and starts to walk toward Nolan. “I think that’s it for right now. We have your game in a little bit, so we don’t want to throw too much. We have to build your arm strength.”

He rubs the top of Nolan’s Terrors hat, which he wears daily now—even in this instance while he’s dressed in his full Little League uniform for his game, where he’ll have to switch it to the team hat soon.

Nolan moves his arm up and down, rubbing his little muscles. “Yeah, I don’t want to throw my arm out.”

Evan laughs. “No, you don’t.”

“Want to throw more tomorrow?”

“We’ll find another day after we look at my schedule.”

Nolan nods, then looks at me. “Can I go play on the playground until the rest of my teammates get here?”

I tilt my head toward the play structure that’s close to the fields. “Yeah, go ahead.”

Nolan throws his glove on the ground and takes off running.

Evan leans down to pick it up. “And just like that, the glove means nothing,” he teases as he sits down next to me.

I nudge him with my leg. “That was pretty cool of you.”

He shrugs like it was nothing. “I love playing catch. Some of my best memories with my dad are of playing catch.”

“Well, get ready. These games are a hoot to watch.”

“I’m pumped,” he says, and I can tell he really means it.

We hang out until a few more players arrive, and I go to get Nolan. When we get back, a few families are talking to Evan.

Nolan runs up and grabs Evan’s hand. “Johnny, did you hear he’s a real baseball player?” he says to his friend standing there.

Johnny bounces with excitement. “I did. And he’s going to watch our game!”

Evan looks at me with a cheesy grin, making me laugh. He’s so nonchalant when it comes to being a professional athlete when he’s around adults, but when he’s around kids, he eats that shit up, loving every second of their joy.

“Okay, boys, let’s go get warmed up,” Coach Tim says, then reaches his hand out to Evan. “It was nice to meet you.”

Evan shakes his hand. “Yeah, you too. Good luck out there.”

He laughs. “Thanks. We need it.”

Everyone walks away, leaving us alone.

I wrap my arms around Evan’s waist. “You’re pretty cool—you know that?”

“Why am I more excited to be here than I am at my games?”

“Because you consider what it would have been like to have someone like you at one of your Little League games.”

The grin on his face is contagious. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Nolan is in his first year of coach pitch; although it’s a step up from T-ball, it’s still a long way from real baseball, but you wouldn’t know it, watching how into the game Evan is. When Nolan is up to bat, Evan sits on the end of his seat, and when Nolan gets a hit, Evan jumps to his feet, cheering him on.

“Go, Nolan!” he yells out, making me laugh.

Nolan jumps up and down with his hands in the air while standing on the base in his own celebration.

Evan turns to me. “We need to come up with his double celly. He’ll be there soon.”

“His double celly?”

Evan smirks at me. “The celebration he’ll do on base when he gets a double.”

“Oh jeez.” I shake my head, laughing more.

Evan winks and goes back to watching the game.

When it’s over, Nolan runs into his arms. “Did you see my hit?”

Evan gives him the biggest hug. “I did! Great job, little man.” He looks at me, then at Nolan, and back at me. “I don’t know about you, but I think a hit like that deserves some ice cream!”

“Can we?” Nolan begs.

“Sorry, should I have asked you first?” Evan whispers to me.

I shake my head with a grin. “Just don’t make a habit of it.” I point to the car. “To ice cream we go!”

Nolan hops out of Evan’s arms and runs to the car. Evan holds my hand as we walk to the car. Even though I feel people watching us, I don’t care.

For the first time since I had Nolan, I finally feel like I’m living for the both of us.