Page 46 of Dirty Roxie

Quinn

Roxie offers to model her new (disguise) wig for Daria and me while we wait for dinner to arrive. The three of us disappear into the bedroom for a little chick-chat at the same time.

“I love this look.” Daria runs the ends of Roxie’s wig through her fingers.

“Yeah?” Roxie asks.

“Definitely. You look like the girl from Jessica Jones.”

“That’s what I thought too!” I add.

Roxie beams, taking it as the compliment it was. “Okay, so am I being totally vain if I tell you both I thought the same thing?”

“No,” I tell her. “You’re being honest. It can’t be vain if it’s true.”

“I keep meaning to ask you.” Roxie lays a hand on my thigh. “You doing okay? You know, after everything.”

I nod, touched that she even asked. “Yep, as good as I can be.”

“Did the therapist I recommended help?” she asks.

“Yousent her to that therapist?” Daria breaks in.

“She’s the best,” Roxie says.

Daria nods thoughtfully, making a face that’s halfway between questioning and frowning.

“What?” Roxie asks.

“Nothing,” Daria says.

Which I know is not true. The therapist upsets Daria and she’s upset about me telling her my feelings about my kidnapping and rescue. It makes me mad that she’s not willing to just own up to it now. And very unlike her. Leading me to believe she’s trying to protect me somehow, which just makes me angrier. “Oh, just tell her,” I say. “You know you want to.”

“Tell me what?” Roxie asks.

I steel myself for what’s coming next. Yes, I told Daria to tell her. No, I’m not ashamed of my feelings. But having it out in the open is still just this side of scary.

“The therapist you think is so great says it’s okay for Quinn to be mad at me for not rescuing her sooner.”

“But you were in the hospital,” Roxie defends. “You got blown out of a tree.”

I knew Roxie would come to her defense. Just like I know the others will too. Because no one was in that room with me. They didn’t experience what I did. Which means they won’t understand where I’m coming from. I get it probably seems selfish and immature on the surface, but it’s also part of my healing process. Mine, not theirs. So, they don’t get to dictate how it goes.

“Exactly,” Daria says drily, agreeing with Roxie. Her tone immediately pissing me off.

“Since when are your feelings more important than mine?” I ask Daria.

“I didn’t say they were,” Daria says.

“Ya kinda did,” I return.

Mack chooses that moment to enter the room with a glass of vodka for Daria, a fresh beer for Roxie, and something yellow with a pineapple wedge for me. “Are we talking about our feelings, girls?” He affects a high-pitched voice and bats his eyelashes at us, immediately breaking some tension that was mounting.

“Only sort of,” Daria says.

Sort of, my ass.

“Daria doesn’t think my feelings are as important as hers,” I tell him, suddenly pulling my balls from some deep pocket I had hidden away. Or maybe didn’t even realize I had.