Page 69 of Deviant Reign (Knight's Ridge Empire 6)

“Yes, yes,” I chant as my release surges forward thanks to my imagination.

My phone continues to buzz but I don’t look. I can’t peel my eyes open to see what he’s saying as I race toward the breakpoint I’ve been desperate for all day.

“Oh God. Yes. Theo. THEO,” I scream, probably way too loudly with my stepmum downstairs, but fuck it. I needed this. I needed this so fucking badly.

Utterly spent, my body sinks into the mattress as my heart pounds, my muscles twitch and endorphins on top of endorphins fill my blood.

Fuck. I needed that.

I might have got myself off last night while I was talking to him. But knowing he was watching took the experience to a whole new level. A twisted and deviant level I didn’t know I needed but now totally crave.

My phone continues to buzz somewhere beside me, but it takes me longer than I’m sure is really necessary to finally move to find it.

When I light it up, I discover I’ve got the longest stream of the filthiest messages I’ve ever read in my life as Theo explained to me in vivid detail just how watching me made him feel.

His words ignite another inferno inside me and I quickly find myself rubbing my thighs together in an attempt to squash another wave of desire taking over me.

Wrong. So wrong.

But it’s his final message that gives me pause and throws cold water over my out-of-control libido.

His Lordship: I need you, babe. So fucking bad. Tell me you’re coming this weekend. I know Stella’s invited you.

“Shit,” I hiss, shifting on the bed so I can pull the sheets over my rapidly cooling body.

The longer I lie there staring at that message, the more my skin burns with his stare despite the covers hiding me from him.

He wants an answer. He deserves an answer. But I don’t have one.

I shouldn’t go, I know that. I should stand my ground, let them all go and do their thing. It would be safer for me to stay here, to lock myself in my room and forget all about them having fun.

So why is it that the thought of letting them go without me sends a shooting pain through my chest?

I finally have friends. The kind I’ve always wanted. I shouldn’t squander this chance to be normal.

Fuck the crazy psychopaths who seem to be after me. They shouldn’t have me cowering and hiding in my fucking bedroom like a pussy.

But even as I think it, a rush of fear that still lingers from being locked up in that cell—even if it was for only a short time—races through me.

Unable to answer his demand but not willing to just ghost him after everything that just happened, I start tapping out a reply.

Emmie: Good night, Theo. Sleep well. x

Immediately, I put my phone on aeroplane mode and breathe out a sigh of relief before throwing the covers off and rushing toward the window. I keep my eyes down, not wanting to risk seeing him out there, if he actually is, as I tug the curtains closed.

I hoped that I might feel some kind of relief cutting myself off from him, from the outside world, but as I walk across the room, ignoring the old Reapers shirt I was wearing and pulling out a pair of my own pyjamas, the only thing I can focus on is the tight knot of anxiety sitting heavy in my belly.

I stop, resting my palms on my dresser, and take a few deep breaths.

I was meant to walk away. To sever whatever this thing was between us. To stand firm in my quest to prove that Theo, his father, my grandfather are all fucking certifiable for this whole situation.

I don’t care that Theo was as blindsided with it as I was. He accepted it and followed Daddy’s orders. He lied, used me, played me, tormented me.

All because of her and her stupid fucking decisions and life choices.

“Argh,” I scream into the silence of my room.

Why am I so drawn to those who are bad for me?