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Things with all three of my men have been intense, but they seem to be okay with our situation. With sharing me. And I have to say, I’ve never been more satisfied or happier.

If they’re good, so am I.

All of my free time is now taken up, and my family has noticed, asking me about a new boyfriend. I’m not quite ready to spill the beans on that one though. I can only imagine the judgmental look on my mom’s face when she finds out I’m not dating one man but three.

Or more specifically that I’m sleeping with all three men.

I do have one lone defense though, and that’s how we’re exclusive…you know, amongst the four of us.

After that first day where they held me in proverbial detention, I’ve been spending more time at their places and in their offices—which, go figure, seems more secure than their homes. Because you know, kids.

We all have families to work around, but it’s been nice to get to know theirs a little bit more. They each have kids who are full of life and personality, even if the teenage mood swings have me a bit uncertain sometimes.

But fuck, I was a teenage girl not that long ago.

Cassidy is the most standoffish for me, even if she gave that peptalk to Waylen about my weight and body image, et cetera.

She usually hides in her room when I’m over, but I got her to come down to help with dinner once by putting on some loud pop music and singing along to it until she joined me. That girl has a set of pipes on her.

Even if she’s a bit shy about it.

Junior has been a pleasant surprise. I’m not sure if it’s weird that we’re only a few years apart in age, and I’m dating his dad, but that guy is a perpetual ray of sunshine.

I think he’s hiding some deep hurts though.

Not my place to push it, but someone who’s been through the kind of trauma he has can’t be happy all the time.

I’ve pushed Waylen to talk to him about it more. They’re close, and I like how hard Waylen works to keep their connection strong.

Ivan has been over the moon to have me in his house after school. Apparently, I make his dad more fun. I think he just likes the treats I bake when I’m over. That and the unsolicited advice about how to treat his new girlfriend because he finally got the nerve to ask Chelsea out.

I even made him a picnic basket so he could take her out to the park one weekend for a lunch date. It was a big hit, and we high-fived over it.

Ruby has been the best. She’s settled into an easy routine with me when I’m over, always wanting to learn how to bake something new with me. We’ve also been trading book recommendations too. I like her taste, and I think she might actually let me read one of her original stories soon.

Time with Waylen, Matteo, and Nick has also developed into something more serious. I spend nights in their beds more often than I do in my own, and occasionally, I get more than one of them at a time. Usually late at night when the kids are already in bed or are away with friends on the weekend.

They’ve made it a habit of torturing me when they’re together, denying me orgasms until I’m so on fire that I can’t think of anything else.

And as energized as I was when we started this a few weeks ago, it seems to be catching up with me. I must be missing too much sleep or not taking proper time to myself or something. I can’t say that I want to be on my own on any given night.

I’m as addicted to the three of them as they seem to be with me, but we’re adults with responsibilities, so something will have to give at some point. Even if it’s only one night to recuperate on my own. Spend some time with my family.

Because I still haven’t introduced them.

I really don’t know how.

So, I push it away and stop thinking about it and stretch myself a little thinner each day because of it.

Today though, I wake up nauseous. Nick rubs my back as I press a cold compress to my forehead and then throat.

“You alright?”

I nod. “Pretty sure I’m just running on fumes. I’ll be fine.”

When I straighten, he tucks me back against his chest. “We’re running you ragged. We’ll understand if you need a night off.”

Yet as he nuzzles the side of my neck, it’s going to be hard to say no and deny us all what we actually want.

“Mmm. I might have to.”

“Well, come on. Let’s get you some breakfast and on to school so that you can go home and rest afterward.”

He makes Ruby and I breakfast burritos, but I struggle to eat mine, packing it away for a snack after class and settling with the cup of coffee. I brush it off and tell him not to worry about it, even though I can see it doesn’t work.

After class, in the lab, I do something I shouldn’t. Especially not at work. I set up some tests that have nothing to do with my experiment.

Nick is the one to pull my blood for me. Each of them knows I hate doing it myself, and Nick is gentle. I barely feel it. He likes to fuss about putting the bandage on and kissing it better. It’s obvious he’s the dad to a little girl who got beat up from sports as a kid.

He won’t stick around long enough to watch me run the equipment, which is a blessing. He’s got meetings this afternoon with some prospective sports teams. Nick lingers just long enough to get a few kisses.

“Need any other help?” Those gentle fingers tuck a stray hair behind my ear, and I close my eyes to his comforting touch.

“Mmm. No. I’m okay. Thank you.”

He leans in to steal another kiss. “Anytime, Liv.”

And I know he means anything . He’s told me time and time again that if I want or need anything, all I have to do is ask. I love that about him. He’s more kind than he’s charming, and he’s ridiculously charming.

I brush my hand across his cheek and give him a slight pat. “Go do your own work.”

That full, bright smile squeezes my heart with the emotions I’ve been teetering on these last few weeks—ever since our surfing trip.

I set up my tests. The waiting is the hardest part. It takes roughly an hour, and I can’t really concentrate on anything else during that time, so I wipe down my table and the equipment. I pace in circles, rubbing the back of my skull and neck.

My head is pounding, and my stomach is roiling even though I tried to eat more of that burrito. I only got halfway through it before I simply lay my cheek against the cool metal of the lab table with my eyes closed, counting my breaths.

When the results ding on my laptop, automatically uploading to the database for me to access. I type in my password, hold my breath, and click on the results.

Numbness spreads through my chest as I stare at them.

I’m absolutely flabbergasted.

The long shot hunch. The box to check to assuage my anxiety. Is positive.

It’s positive.

I’m pregnant.

Fuck, what do I do? I have no idea whose it is.

This is going to blow up in my face.

And there’s only one person I can talk to about this. I need my bestie.

I text her, When are you out of work?

Her reply is almost instantaneous. In an hour. Y. What’s up?

I’ve gotten some bad news…maybe. Not a great text to send, but I’m borderline panicking here.

Meet me at my place. I’ll be home ASAP. Use the hidden key to get in.

I pack up immediately, having three hours before my session with my subjects. I have to get there before anyone asks me what’s wrong because I might just break down. And I cannot do that at work. Not with everything else I’ve been doing here.

Shawna makes it home a mere five minutes after I let myself into her place and nurse one of her blue sports drinks. The moment she spots me, it’s like she already knows. When my hand covers my stomach, the tears come.

I’m terrified about what this means for the peace I’ve found with my men.

Will this be the end of their willingness to share me? Or will this mean I finally have to make a real choice. Will it be made for me?

I can’t lose them. Not any of them.