Page 28

DANTE

Dante jolted upright in bed, drenched in a cold sweat.

Where was Ollie? Was he okay?

Dante glanced around his room. He swore Ollie had been in his arms, slipping away, and Dante hadn’t been able to save him. But, of course, Ollie wasn’t there.

It must have been a dream.

He scrubbed a hand over his face, tempted to reach out through the bond and check on Ollie. But he couldn’t. Ollie had soured on their connection as soon as they’d had their pleasure. He didn’t want Dante to see that much of him.

After getting up and pulling on underwear, Dante went to the kitchen. It was blessedly empty. Ash must still be asleep. Dante opened his drawer and took out a chocolate. He was running low.

A flash of Ollie, blood-soaked and unmoving, cut across Dante’s mind, the feel of Ollie’s blood suddenly coating his hands.

Dante rolled his shoulders, wings rustling. Everything was fine. It was only a memory.

He ate the whole chocolate bar while heating a mug of blood. He brought the hot drink and two more chocolates back to his room. The hollow feeling of doom that had jolted him awake lingered.

Even if he couldn’t feel Ollie through the bond, Dante could still check on him.

He forced the mug of blood down his throat, then picked up his phone and called his mate.

“Hey, Dante. What’s up?” Ollie’s voice was strained.

Damnation, did he not want Dante to call? It probably wasn’t cool to call so soon after a hookup or whatever the hell had happened between them.

“Hi, Ollie. Sorry to bother you. I, um…wanted to check you were okay.”

“About last night?” Ollie sounded even more tense.

“No. I mean, yes. I’d want to know if anything changed there, but that’s not why I called. I had a bad dream.” Dante’s words died and his face burned.

Would death from the known universe be all that bad? It couldn’t be worse than this.

“Oh no. I’m sorry.” Concern replaced Ollie’s hesitance. “I’m perfectly fine, promise.”

“Thank you.” Dante cleared his throat, examining the candy in his hand. “I couldn’t stop from checking, even though I knew nothing would be wrong.”

“That’s okay.”

No one spoke for longer than was comfortable.

“Can I see you?” Dante asked, all but crushing the candy. “I know you have work, but can I see you later today?”

“I’m meeting Dex after work.”

Dante’s heart sank. He needed his mate. Even with no regrets about last night, Dante was shaken. Everything seemed different now that he’d held Ollie so close to his heart.

“I’ll be home after dinner,” Ollie continued. “We could meet then.”

“Yes, that would be great.” Dante sat on the bed, legs weak. “I’ll meet you at your apartment.”

“I’ll text you.” Ollie paused and Dante hung on the silence. “Are you okay to wait? I want to be there for you too. We could talk more now if your dream is still bothering you. Or something else?”

“Thank you, Ollie. I’m all right. See you tonight.”

He needed to have this conversation in person when Ollie wasn’t worried about rushing off to work. But Ollie’s offer mattered.

His mate wanted to take care of him. Dante clung to the knowledge all day.

Dante landed on Ollie’s roof, his insides fluttering more than his wings.

He couldn’t afford to hope anything had changed between him and Ollie. Being intimate over the phone was something they’d stumbled into. It might not mean anything. Ollie could feel lust and longing for Dante and still not desire anything romantic.

But Dante had to know for sure. One day of uncertainty had him at his limit.

He should have gone to see Ren and checked on her progress. He should have worked on convincing Onyx to go on the offensive against Luc. Instead, he’d done nothing but eat chocolate and sugary cereal. Then gone to the store to restock his drawer and fill another with a savory treat stash for Ollie.

At least Ash had been occupied with Harper, so no one had witnessed Dante’s hopelessness .

He paced the roof until Ollie texted to let Dante know he was home.

Dante shoved his phone back in his pocket. Did he wait a little longer to go down? That way, Ollie wouldn’t know he’d been sitting up here, darkening the roof like an impatient gargoyle.

No. Dante wasn’t playing games or hiding things. He and Ollie needed to work this out with all their cards on the table.

Dante went inside and knocked on Ollie’s door. A moment later, it swung open, revealing his wide-eyed mate.

“That was fast. Were you already here?”

Dante cleared his throat. “I was waiting on the roof.”

Ollie’s brow furrowed. “Come on in. Let’s go to my room.”

Dante followed him through the apartment, nodding to Ash and Harper in the living room. He entered Ollie’s bedroom and Ollie closed the door. His sandalwood scent was everywhere, the space small and furniture arranged close together with every surface covered in one thing or another.

Dante smiled.

Ollie sat on the bed, his eyes darting around. “Sorry, there’s nowhere else to sit.”

Dante perched next to him. “This is perfectly fine.”

He glanced at the rumpled bedspread and the sounds Ollie had made last night filled his mind. Dante’s insides went molten. Ollie had lain here and touched himself thinking of Dante. Fuck. Last night seemed even more real now that he could imagine every last detail.

There was no doubt he’d revisit the memory, especially when it might be as close to Ollie as he’d ever get.

The heat in Dante’s core cooled.

“I need to talk about what happened last night.”

Ollie’s cheeks bloomed red. “Was it not okay? It doesn’t have to be a big deal or change anything. ”

Dante swallowed the lump forming in his throat.

“I’m not saying what happened wasn’t okay.

I wanted it as much as you did. And it’s fine if it isn’t a big deal for you.

But…” Dante’s chest tightened. He had to admit what last night meant to him, even if it opened him up to rejection that would break his heart.

His fire burned and sweat tickled his palms. “I’m happy to be your friend.

No, I’m honored to be close to you as a friend.

But if we’re going to have a platonic bond, I can’t add intimacy to the equation.

I can’t have sex with you without it feeding my romantic desires.

If we’re going to remain friends, it can’t happen again. ”

Ollie stared at Dante for a long moment, eyes wide and unblinking. Dante’s fire raged inside him and the air between them seemed to pull tight.

At last, Ollie spoke, his voice shaking slightly. “When I said it didn’t have to be a big deal, I…I didn’t mean it meant nothing to me.” He looked at his lap. “Having you as a friend feels safer.”

Dante’s heart clenched, not sure why Ollie felt that way. “I want you to feel safe and friends is what we agreed on. I’m not asking to change that. We just can’t blur the lines.”

Ollie looked up. “That’s fair. I wouldn’t want to hurt you.”

“I know. And you haven’t.” Ollie shouldn’t feel guilty. Dante wouldn’t trade last night for anything, even if clearing things up strangled something inside him. “Relationships aren’t for you, I know that. I’m not expecting you to change who you are because I have feelings about last night.”

Ollie bit his bottom lip, worrying it between his teeth. “Change who I am? What do you mean? Wait. I’m not aromantic. I didn’t mean relationships aren’t for me in that way.”

He wasn’t? Dante had known that was a possibility, but it had seemed equally possible that Ollie was aromantic.

“Oh, okay,” was all Dante managed to say. Opening up to more than one type of bond wasn’t a bad thing in any way he looked at it. He could only work with what Ollie told him.

Ollie cringed as if he were embarrassed. “Sorry.”

“No, don’t be. There’s nothing to apologize for. I tried not to assume.” Dante faltered. “Can I ask why you aren’t interested in relationships?”

“It’s not that I’m not interested.” Ollie chewed the fingernail of his ring finger, his other arm folded protectively across his body as he seemed to come to some decision.

He straightened. “I’m scared. I’ve been in abusive relationships that took over my whole life, and I’m afraid of getting attached and losing myself and my independence in an us .

Especially with our bond. I have feelings for you, Dante, but I need to know I’ll still be me.

I need to choose. Being a fated mate is this huge thing, and it scares me that I like you because the bond is everything I shouldn’t want. ”

Ollie had chosen friendship as his safe space, and everything that had happened since the beach had been testing him.

Dante reached for Ollie, and Ollie held out his hand. Dante clasped it and held it tight, his heart breaking. “I’m so sorry your past partners didn’t treat you right.”

Ollie looked away, a heavy air of discomfort settling over him. “I don’t want to get into it.”

“We don’t have to.” Dante wished he could take Ollie’s pain away and wrap him in safe feelings.

Ollie’s hand tightened around Dante’s. “Thank you. I’m sure I’ll want to talk about it one day, but not now.” His gaze slid back to Dante and held firm, their eyes locked.

Dante smiled softly. “I’ll be here for you when you do.”

“I like knowing that,” Ollie whispered, voice thick. “I can count on you.”

Fuck if that didn’t feel like the most important thing. Ollie’s trust was a gift Dante would never get tired of .

Ollie cleared his throat. “I’ve always wanted to be open to relationships again—one day—but it’s hard. I don’t know what I need to feel safe. Getting involved is always going to be a risk. But I wish I could figure it out because I want you, Dante, like a boyfriend, a partner, a mate.”

Dante’s breath caught. “What if we could find a way for you to feel safe together?”

Ollie’s face brightened. “Do you think we could?”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. I never thought I’d trust anyone enough to get through this with me. But with you…” He gave his head a little shake. “If we could figure it out, I’d take these feelings and run. As long as I can trust them, knowing magic is a part of it all.”