Page 15 of Delay of Game (Norwalk Breakers #4)

FIFTEEN

GRACIE

Rob’s face gave away his disappointment. His brow set, mouth forming a thin line as he set the box of vinyl flooring by the door.

I bit my bottom lip, surveying the room through his eyes. “I meant to…”

The words died on my lips. I’d had weeks to clear out Aunt Mercy’s room, to move the furniture, box up the donations, and set aside the mementos. Still, the number of a local women’s shelter that posted online that they needed furniture in good condition remained uncalled.

Rob sighed heavily, raking a hand through his hair so the ends stood up. He craned his neck down the hallway. “We can’t put all this stuff in the bathroom. Will it fit into your room? Or maybe we can get some of the furniture downstairs?”

I eyed the solid wood furniture doubtfully. “Maybe?”

“I could call someone,” he grunted.

My chest tightened and I rubbed it with a fist. “Don’t do that. How about we work in a different room? I swear I’ll get this done by next week.”

“I have an away game next week. And if we finish this room, you can patch and paint while I’m gone.

” His voice sounded tight. Even if he didn’t say it, I’d definitely annoyed him.

“We don’t need to sort this mess. I just need it out of here.

Let’s move what we can downstairs. Everything else lives in the hall. ”

The last month of packing had already left a maze of tight trails through the house. More stuff wouldn’t make a difference.

Rob wasted no time pushing an old oak wardrobe across the room and into the hall, leaving barely enough room for him to squeeze back in.

Forcing myself not to sort through every sheet of paper and picture, I grabbed a stack of empty boxes, putting them together and cramming as much as I could fit into each.

Annoyance radiated off of Rob as he muscled furniture out of the room.

“Do you just want me to handle this? I watched you put down flooring in the kitchen. I can probably put down the flooring on my own. You could go hang out with Mila,” I offered, unsure how much I’d actually retained, but willing to try anything to ease the tension in the room.

“No,” he said through clenched teeth as he attempted to slide a dresser across the floor.

“There are a bunch of books in the bottom drawer.” I pulled open the drawer, frowning at the encyclopedia I’d jammed in there to get out of the way.

“Why?” He collapsed against the dresser, dropping his forehead onto the top.

“I meant to donate those. But…”

“But you didn’t get around to it. Got it.” He crouched down and pushed the dresser forward with a high-pitched squeak of wood against wood. He grunted with effort as he moved it over the threshold and into the packed hallway, my anxiety mounting with each unfamiliar noise.

Cleaning the house shouldn’t be hard. What else did I have to do?

I barely went out. Except for my very new exploration into pottery, I didn’t have any hobbies.

Hell, I couldn’t even work up the effort to join a gym.

At the very least, I should have had the house cleared out.

But every time I started cleaning a room, memories of Aunt Mercy hit me, and the consuming guilt of not visiting, not keeping her at home, overwhelmed me.

Rob eased some of the tension. Normally, anyway. Having him around made the project feel more like a chore and less like an emotional whirlwind.

Except today.

While I packed another stack of books into a box, he walked back into the room, resting an arm on the door frame.

“Listen,” he said, and my body stilled, filling in the rest of his sentence.

Listen, I didn’t sign up for this.

Listen, you need to handle this yourself.

Listen, you’re taking advantage of my help.

Listen, I just did this for my mom. I don’t want to be around you.

My fears whirled in around my head, waiting to find out which one would come out.

He closed his eyes, wiping his forehead off with the back of his hand.

“Work sucked. I’m in a bad mood and I have no business taking it out on you.

I thought coming over would take my mind off things, but I might not be in the mood for a project.

Why don’t we blow this off for the time being.

I’ve got a couple of short days next week.

I’ll come back and finish it up before I leave town. Can we do something that’s not this?”

We.

I stuttered over a response. “You’re…Are you…don’t you want me to finish cleaning the room?”

He craned his neck around, as if he hadn’t considered me staying behind before. Then he shook his head. “Not really.”

“You don’t want to go hang out with Mila?” I winced even as the words raced out of my mouth, my heart skipping a beat.

“She’s got…fuck, I don’t know. Some practice. Mom took her. I just need to make it home for dinner. Besides, Mila’s had enough of me.” He chuckled under his breath. “She doesn’t appreciate my music choices during our morning commute to school.”

I smiled. “She mentioned you don’t like Kidz Bop.”

“Kidz Bop is a musical war crime. I won’t have it in my car. I told her she could pick any actual artist and she said Blippi. Who the hell is Blippi?”

“Answering that will just piss you off even more. I’ll let you figure it out on your own.”

He sobered, his eyes locking on mine. “Besides, you don’t seem like your heart is in this project, either. Why’s that?”

My bottom lip slipped into my mouth. “Nothing in particular.”

His eyes stayed glued to my face, a disbelieving frown forming as his brows pulled close together. “Come on. I told you my deep, dark secret, and you don’t want to tell me yours?”

“Your deep dark secret is work sucks and you don’t like Kidz Bop?”

“Okay, maybe not dark, but I sound like a dick when I complain about my job as a highly paid pro football player. Especially to a teacher who’s making an actual difference in the world.”

“Molding young minds,” I laughed with a shake of my head. “I think you’re allowed to complain about your job no matter what. No one loves their job all the time. What’s going on?”

He shrugged. “I’m not really sure. Something just isn’t clicking with the team, and everything feels…off. Maybe it’s just pre-season nerves.”

“But you don’t think it is?” I filled in the rest of the sentence for him. He shook his head. “Sounds stressful. Especially since you can’t do anything about it, football being a team sport and all.”

His face clouded but cleared just as fast. “Yeah. Nothing to do. So, tell me yours.”

My cheeks burned as I leaned against the wall, crossing my arms over my chest. I didn’t want to admit to myself that I was avoiding Aunt Mercy. Admitting to Rob what a shitty niece and person I was almost too much to bear. “You’re going to think I suck.”

His face softened. “I won’t think you suck.”

Tears pricked the corners of my eyes, and I clenched my jaw, forcing them away. “No, it’s pretty sucky.”

“Well, the good news is you’re speaking to one of the suckiest people in the area. You’re in good company.”

I laughed despite myself. “That’s not true.”

“Completely true,” he countered, taking a step closer. “I once spent an entire interview refusing to answer a single question.”

“And why did you do that?”

“The reporter tried to publish a picture of Mila.”

“Sounds like he was the sucky person, not you.”

“Okay,” Rob grinned. “I’ll give you that one. How about I once left a practice mid-drill because I didn’t like the coach’s tone.”

“And are you still on that team?”

He shook his head. “Nah. I left at the end of the season.”

“I still don’t think that sucks.”

“I yell at people all the time.”

“You’ve never yelled at me,” I countered. “And I highly doubt you yell at your mom. Or Mila.”

“If you think I’m some chivalrous asshole, I’d like to introduce you to our running backs coach. I’ve yelled at her.”

“Maybe she sucks too?”

He grinned at that. “Probably. I doubt she’d mind me saying as much. Still, you’re in good sucky company.”

Despite his reassurances, I ducked my head.

“I’m avoiding visiting my aunt. I haven’t been in two weeks, and I barely call other than to talk to the nursing staff.” The words rushed out, filling the empty room with a confession I wasn’t sure I should have made. My breath stalled in my throat.

He nodded, meeting my eyes. “I get it.”

It wasn’t the response I expected, though I wasn’t really sure what I expected. Something between disgust and sympathy. Some acknowledgement that avoiding my ill aunt made me a monster. Not an “I get it.”

“But I still suck.”

He shrugged, extending his hand to my elbow and giving it a squeeze. “It’s gotta be hard not knowing if she knows who you are or where she is. Especially after living together for so long.”

“It’s only, she’s hardly ever lucid at night, anymore. If I go in the evenings, I make her mad or scared right before bed. It upsets both of us, which only leaves the weekends…”

The pressure of his callused hand on my elbow felt nice, comforting. Rob didn’t seem like much of a toucher, and I waited for his hand to fall away. Dreaded it.

Instead, his fingertips ran up my arm, fluttering over my back as his other hand drew me in close. My cheek pressed to his broad chest as his arms enveloped me in a warm hug. A comforting hug. One I didn’t want to end.

“I should visit, though, even if she doesn’t know me. She doesn’t have anyone else. And I hate the thought of her being lonely. Of waking up in the morning alone and confused. Of the days where she knows where she is and doesn’t know why she’s alone.”

“She’s not alone. She’s near people. Lots of people. She has the nursing staff and the other residents. You did the right thing, moving her into a home. I get why it’s hard to visit.” His breath was hot, lips brushing my hair as his arms tightened into a wonderfully consuming hug.

“I just need to pull off the band aid and visit, but it’s been so long. What if she doesn’t recognize me anymore?” My fears bubbled out of my mouth in a torrent mixed with the tears.

“Then she’ll recognize you the next time. Or maybe the time after that. Even if she can’t remember you, she knows you.”

I burrowed into Rob, the combination of physical contact and my confession lessening some of my stress.

“I’d love to meet her. How about you bring me along?” His grip tightened as his lips glanced the top of my head. An incidental touch so close to a kiss that my body shivered. “Not today. But I’m back in town on Tuesday. How about we go then?”

“You don’t have to do that, Rob.”

“But I want to.” He pulled back, his soft brown eyes searching mine and his hands rubbing my arms. His face twisted, the smile fading into a look of confusion that faded away as his hands fell.

“Now, I have an hour, and I’ve always wanted to know what the fuck a bunco is. Any chance you can explain it to me?”