16

ALESSANDRO

“ I made lunch. Would you like some?” I poke my head into the den. Isabella is curled up on the couch reading.

The way her eyes light up when she smiles makes my heart skip a beat.

She makes me feel so alive.

Like someone else entirely.

Not a don, a leader of warriors, a criminal mastermind. I’m just Alessandro. I can indulge every desire with her without judgment.

The escapism of it is horribly dangerous. Adriano was right to worry. But I won’t bring this back with me. Unless she is willing to come…

Thoughts of Catalina no longer destroy me, but they inject doubt into this relationship. The fact of the matter is that it’s damn near impossible for someone like me to have love, security; which is why the elders want me to marry for politics.

It keeps the risk lower.

Mostly for the other person. They could be used against me, they could get hurt just being near me.

“Isabella?” I ask after we’ve both taken several bites of our risotto and braised pork. I’ve gotten pretty good at cooking since we’ve been here.

“Yes?”

“What are your plans after this?” Her eyes crinkle at the edges. She knows it’s not just a simple question I’m asking.

“I’m not sure. My vacation got thrown for a loop. I may head back home. The snow is sort of a damper on exploring any more of the countryside or looking for more family members.”

Family. Right. That’s why she came here.

A stray thought worms its way into my mind unbidden.

What if she joined my family?

What if I told her everything, all of the dirty details of my life. Who I really am. I have a feeling she already knows more than she’s let on. We just haven’t addressed it. It would make things easier.

Would she come with me if I asked?

“So Rome, right? I think you mentioned that a few times. Your job must be wanting you back by now.”

“Yes…I mean, mostly it’s a freelance position,” she shrugs.

“Photography, I remember. Freelance. So you could work from anywhere?”

“I mean, I could.” She’s avoiding my gaze.

“Would it be too much of an imposition if we tagged along with you back to Rome? We’ll likely head there before returning to New York.

Her eyes light up at this, a nugget of information that I never shared.

“I'd love that. Always better to travel together.” She smiles, finishing her lunch, clearly avoiding the elephant in the room.

“Good. We may be leaving as early as next week.” I stand clearing our dishes. It’s too easy to leave the room and not say a damn thing about it either.

That our time is coming to an end.

We’ll go our separate ways and probably never see one another again. After leaving the dishes in the sink, I head straight to my office, slumping into my chair across from Adriano working on his laptop. He glances up, tonguing his front tooth.

“What?” I ask.

“Nothing.”

“No, out with it.”

“You can’t tell her. Or ask her.”

“Ask her what?” Playing a fool never worked on Adriano. He frowns, raising one eyebrow.

“She’s an outsider. You can't put that on her, dragging her into our lifestyle.”

“I knew the risks when I let her stay. I accept the consequences.”

“I’m sorry that it has to be this way.”

Does it, though? I want to ask.

Isabella has shown total acceptance of me so far. She’s open minded. Tenacious. She’s adaptable.

But asking her into my life would be like offering her poison. Even if she knew the risks, she would still be in danger.

There's no way for any normal person to truly understand how deadly and dangerous it really is.

“You'll be doing her a favor sending her away, Aless.”

Those words haunt me the rest of the day as I occupy myself in any way I can to avoid talking to her, spilling my guts, and bearing my soul to her.

The truth tries its hardest to surface, the reality that I can’t bear to be without her. The idea that I could corrupt her to have what I want. That I could save her if I don’t.

Even so, we brush fingertips as we pass each other in the hall, stealing kisses here and there. After the past week, how can we not?

That night Adriano split a couple of bottles of wine, chatting in my office. I’m feeling a rich, heady buzz when he staggers out to go to bed. He never had the legs for drinking like I did. That and he’s pissed I still haven’t gotten around to ending things with Isabella, or making it clear that we cannot continue after this.

I’m staring up at the ceiling when I hear the door creak open.

Isabella’s leaning in the doorway, wearing her nightgown, holding her own glass of wine.

“Are you coming to bed tonight?” Her voice is low, sultry.

We hadn’t really discussed that either. How we would behave once Adriano and the staff came back.

“I hadn’t decided, honestly.” I don't mean to be short with her, but my temper has been rubbed raw today. The responsibilities of my life avalanching back onto my shoulders.

Her eyebrows furrow. “You can talk to me, you know, tell me what's going on. What's bothering you? You haven’t been yourself all day.”

“I really can't. I mean, I shouldn’t.”

“You won’t, you mean.” Her tone goes flat.

It's tempting. To get all of my woes off my chest.

“Why won’t you just?—”

“You know, sometimes you really push too far. All your fucking questions,” I snap.

She's taken aback for a second, watching my closely.

“I seem to remember you liking my inquisitive nature. But you never actually tell me anything. Every answer is a dodge, a move on a chess board,” she bites back, bitterness in her voice. “We can just be lovers, if that’s all you want. We can just be physical. But I don’t think that either of us really want that.”

“I shouldn’t have even done that,” I say before I can stop myself. “I have to make the hard calls. I didn’t, and now look at us.”

“Fine. So you make a hard call. Say you end this, you shove down the guilt, the pain, and move on. Go back to your life. Alone. Miserable. And for what?”

“It’s my obligation.”

“Then better for you to have let me die out there in the blizzard when I knocked on your door. Better that we never met.”

“It would be!” I shout, staggering to my feet.

“Always playing the martyr, Alessando. Living your life for everyone but yourself. Denying anything good for you!”

“What I want doesn't matter. I do what I have to do.”

“There’s always a choice.” She stabs her finger into my chest.

A snarl reaches my lips at the gesture, tempting me to snatch her hand, break her finger. “You have no idea who I really am.”

“Then show me who you really are. Let me in, Alessandro!”

“I've already let this go too far.”

She's leaning over the desk, glaring at me. Challenging me.

“Show. Me. Who. You. Really. Are.”

In a heartbeat I'm over the desk, crushing her in my arms, our mouths colliding feverishly. The heady scent of wine fills my nostrils.

I slam her into the door, closing it and tear her gown from her, ripping the straps to expose her tits, devouring one nipple whole.

“Oh, God yes! More!” Yet there’s a wide-eyed hint of terror in her eyes, or maybe it’s just surprise at my outburst.

I find that I don’t care which.

I’ve wanted to show her the truth for days.

I pull away without hesitation, leaving her stumbling in my wake, storming over to the bookcase. I click the button under the shelf, opening the secret door.

The door swings back quietly on greased hinges, the lights flickering on automatically, revealing my private chamber. A room I had made for a day I thought would never come.

Isa’s eyes widen as she approaches, surveying the room, realization dawning as she sees what lies within.

Chains, ropes, straps. The toys.

Our gazes meet, searing and smoldering, and a shiver shoots through me at what I see in her eyes. She's not afraid.

Or rather she is, but she wants this.

And that desire written clear on her face has me rock-hard, about to burst out of my pants.

Her pulse is throbbing in her neck, her chest heaving her perky, tight breasts as she steps in cautiously. She looks back as I close the door, padlocking it.

“Get ready, Isabella. Tonight, you're going to find out who I really am.”