CHAPTER ONE

CHANEL

I woke to the rhythmic tapping of rain against my windowpane. It was cold for October in the Midwest. My reluctant move to Chicago wasn’t going as bad as I thought it would. From the outside looking in, Chicago seemed dangerous. Now that I had taken up residence here, it wasn’t bad at all in my neighborhood. It wasn’t any worse than where I came from.

Regardless, I didn’t want to be here. I was going to make the best out of this bad situation that was forced upon me. No need to bitch and moan about it. I was at a point where I could say it is, what it is.

I had just finished making my apartment livable. No more boxes or random clothes tossed about. Everything finally had its place. It felt like a comfortable, cozy home. It wasn’t too bright and bold. But it wasn’t too dark and dull. I reached a happy medium. This apartment was my new sanctuary.

Months alone in a new city all by myself was driving me stir crazy. After a few months of getting adjusted, I was ready to have some company at my place. My best friend Morgan was coming in from out of town just to visit me. She was bringing the one thing I didn’t have in my refrigerator, wine. I hadn’t wrapped my lips around a bottle of anything alcoholic in a long time. I wasn’t on a cleanse, but it sure seemed that way. I wanted to start my new life in a new city completely dry. I didn’t have a drinking problem, but I was embarking on a new life. With that came a new state of mind.

Morgan was my long-time loyal friend. She was my ride or die. She was driving six hours to see me. Although she didn’t like to drive, I thought it would be safer for her that way. Who was I kidding? It would be safer for the both of us. I had a restraining order against my ex-boyfriend from the court. I wasn’t sure the order held any merit out of the state of its issue. I could hope.

I left town because I was terrified he would come after me. I wasn’t sure what he would do. Would he try to follow my friends to find my current location? Who knew? I didn’t want to take that chance. I wished I never laid eyes on Alonzo Lopez. It was much too late for wishes. Bad things happened, and I never thought I would be in this situation. But I was in it up to my eyeballs.

Earlier in the day, I was in a good mood at the office because I knew I would see my friend later. Morgan arrived soon after I got home from work. I buzzed her up to my spacious two bedroom second-floor apartment. She wheeled her cute little rolling luggage into my front door. She had her shoulder bag and a cloth grocery bag slung over her shoulder. Seeing her made me emotional. I missed her. When we hugged, I felt a huge weight lift off my chest. I missed all my friends. Starting over was hard. Seeing my bestie made everything feel just a little bit better.

My friend looked pretty damn good. She was exactly the same as last time I saw her, but her summer tan had worn off. She was pale again. Her sandy-colored hair was pulled back in a low, curly ponytail.

Morgan’s eyes scanned me up and down. “Coco, you cut your hair.”

I missed being called Coco. “Yes, I did.” I took the shopping bag with the wine from her shoulder and rushed it into my open kitchen.

“Why? I loved your thick, long hair.” She followed me until she stopped to lean on the kitchen island.

“New life, new hairstyle, new me.” I removed the wine from the bag and placed the four bottles on the countertop.

“I kind of like it. I’m just used to seeing you with long ass hair.”

“It’s not the first time I cut my hair.”

“I know, but you should let me curl it.”

“You can, tomorrow. Aren’t you tired from all that driving?”

“A little, but I haven’t seen you in three months.”

I grabbed two wineglasses from the cabinet and the corkscrew from the top junk drawer. “I had to go. I didn’t have much of a choice.” I removed the cork of the Pinot Grigio.

“I know. It’s just so crazy not having you around. I have to hang out with dingy ass, Donna.”

“Donna loves you.” I poured the wine into both of our glasses without spilling a drop.

“Donna gets on my nerves. She fetishizes me and it’s weird.”

“She does, but you know she has color issues. Ignore her.” I slid Morgan’s glass across the island.

“I try, but she is too much.”

I took a long gulp from my glass. “Have you heard anything about Lonzo?”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Thank God.” I let out an enormous sigh of relief.

“No, well, I know he’s out on bail. I would be very careful if I were you.”

“I am as careful as I can be.” I took another drink to calm my nerves.

“How’s the new job going?”

“It’s okay. It’s kids, so it can’t really be bad.”

“If you say so. Kids get on my nerves.”

“Everything gets on your nerves. ”

Morgan giggled. “You right. I need a Caribbean vacation. We should go to Mexico.”

“I can’t leave my job for a vacation. I just started.”

“Ah, yeah, that’s right.”

“I met a guy.” I opted to change the subject.

“Already? You just got here. Who? How? Where?”

“At work?”

“Really? I can never meet anybody.”

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “You already have a boyfriend.”

“For how long? I really think he’s going to leave me for a White woman.”

A White woman? Morgan was biracial. She was so light that she was White passing when she wore her hair straight. So I had no idea what she was talking about. “Why do you think that?” I decided to indulge in her far-fetched fantasy.

“I don’t know. I just do.” She took a sip of her wine. I could tell she had things on her mind. “Tell me about this guy you met at work.”

“He comes into the office a lot. We started talking and I think he’s feeling me.”

“Wait. Hold up. He comes into the pediatrician’s office? So you saying he got a kid or kids?”

“No, I don’t know. I never asked him that.”

“Is he a FedEx driver or something? Because I know you know better than that.”

“He’s a pharmaceutical sales rep.”

“Is he White?” Her face morphed into a huge frown.

“No, of course not.”

“He’s Black.”

“Oh, for real? That’s a good job for a brotha.” She slapped her hand down on the countertop. “What’s wrong with him?”

I shrugged, thinking about the question. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with him. I don’t know him well. He just stops in to peddle his drugs. We talk. He seems like good people. That’s it.”

“Is he tall?”

“Now you know, you the only one that date short dudes.”

“The short ones have all the money.”

“That’s not true. Plus, you have more money than every man you ever dated. I swear you don’t make no sense.”

“Okay yeah, first off I gets my coins, but they never know how much money I make.”

“Now that’s true. You are the queen of secrets.”

“I will take that as a compliment. You need to stop opening up and telling these men all your business.” She was right.

“Anyway, he’s tall. He’s fine, and I think he’s normal.”

“Ba-bee, your judgment is not good.”

“No, no, no, don’t do that. I picked one thug. It is not a pattern.”

“I guess, child.” She smacked her lips.

“Don’t even try me like that.”

“I’m not, but Lonzo Lopez is not one bad apple. He’s the whole damn apple tree.”

“That may be true, but I didn’t know about his past. He hid it well. He acted like a gentleman in the beginning.”

“He did. I will give you that. But I really don’t want you to jump into anything serious until this mess with Lonzo is over. He needs to be locked away in some prison downstate, upstate or in another state.”

“I agree.” She was right again.

“Get him gone before you even think about dating someone new.”

Morgan was trying to run my life. What else was new?

“His case is going to take forever to go to trial.” Probably an entire year, and since he was out on bail, I had to stay away. I wasn’t the only witness to his crimes, but I didn’t want to testify against him. The state was making me. I really hoped they changed their minds and didn’t call me to testify. They didn’t need me to put him away.

“Hey, Coco, straight up. I just would feel better if he was gone for good.”

“You? I will feel better if they locked him up and threw away the key.”

“I would be okay if he ate a bullet.”

Geez, that was harsh. I felt bad because I actually agreed with her. I just didn’t have the balls to say it out loud. Lonzo, six feet under, would solve all my problems. I shook my head yes.

“You should stay away from anyone with a penis.”

She had a good point. I shouldn’t even think about men. The last one was an epic fail. Lonzo was a crafty chameleon. He was so nice the day we met. I just didn’t even see whom he really was inside.

There was a brief silence between us as we finished off our first glass and we took turns pouring ourselves another.

It was late when we finished eating the Chinese food I had delivered. I missed hanging out with Morgan. I missed so many things from my old life. If you’d asked me to predict the future, I would’ve never guessed I would be in this situation. I fled my seemingly perfect life because of a man. I had never dated a Mexican, and if I live through this nightmare, I will never date another one. I’m over it and for now over dating at all.

We both drank wine until we were both between tipsy and drunk as a skunk. Morgan could drink me under the table, around the table, and on top of the table. After two glasses of wine, I was a giddy, giggly mess. I was a featherweight and my bright skin friend was a heavyweight.

After trying desperately to learn TikTok dances we were too old to master, we sprawled out on the couch to watch the classic vampire movie Blade. Morgan loved Wesley Snipes, and I just didn’t get it. She thought he was fine, and I tried to never have any thoughts about the man. I had many things in common with Morgan, but our taste in men wasn’t one of them .

I should’ve stopped drinking. By the end of the movie, I was three sheets to the wind. Morgan was getting there. She had the stomach of an Irish sailor.

“Hey, didn’t you tell me there were a lot of old people in this building?” There she was with her random questions.

“Pretty much.” I shook my head up and down.

“Are there any cute guys?”

“Cute guys?” I tried to think about her question. But it wasn’t looking good for me. I was at the intoxicated stage where I was going to repeat the words that were said to me. I was probably going to slur them as well. I knew myself.

“Yes, any cute ones in your building?” She repeated.

“Not any cute ones, but there is that one weird guy that lives in the basement. I guess it’s a basement apartment. It’s below ground.”

“Basements are below ground.” She smarted.

“Right, but it’s on the other side of the building. His apartment has a black door, and he’s down there with the storage spaces and the laundry room.” It seemed that I knew a little too much about my strange neighbor.

“What’s weird about him?” Morgan asked.

“He only comes out at night.” Something I found quite peculiar.

“Maybe he works the night shift.”

“I don’t think so. There’s no set time. He just only leaves his apartment at night.”

“Ohhhh, hell, he’s nocturnal. He must be a vampire.”

That was a leap, but I went with it. “One morning I left to go to the gym at five in the morning. It was still dark out and I saw him in the entryway. He didn’t see me. He had red paint all over him.”

“Red paint.” Morgan’s gray eyes bulged. “Child, that was blood. He’s a vampire. You live in the same building as Edward Cullen.” Morgan was somewhat excited about her wild declaration. My bestie was a vampire fan, just like me .

“He’s a little bit cooler than Edward Cullen. He’s more like Angel from Buffy.”

“Oh well. Maybe you should shoot your shot.”

“He’s White.” It tackily came out of my mouth because I always forgot Morgan was biracial. “I’m not shooting shit.”

“Girl, stop.” Morgan chuckled.

“You see what happened the last time I dated outside my race. I’m sticking with the brothers. At least I’ll know what I’m getting.”

“You trippin’. My dad is White, and he’s awesome.” That was true. “I didn’t say marry the vampire.”

“Well, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying let’s have a little fun.”

Her idea of fun was too mischievous for me. She was White passing, which came with White privilege. The things she could get away with, I couldn’t even think about. Sometimes she would forget that we weren’t the same. It wasn’t her fault. But I wasn’t too drunk to do anything that would get my Black ass in trouble. I knew better.

Morgan hopped off the couch. She strolled over to my little workstation by the window that faced the courtyard and the street. I watched her rummage through the hodgepodge of things on my desk. She grabbed an ink pen out of my gold rhinestone cup. Opening the printer’s drawer, she grabbed a single piece of the white copy paper. She trotted back over to me. What was she up to?

I missed Morgan and her antics. I was going to be depressed when she left me to go back to Minnesota. I wish I had a friend here in Chicago to distract me from the loneliness.