Page 8 of Darkest Before Dawn (His Perfect Darkness #2)

I nara

I wake up to a faint creaking sound and the sensation of being rocked like a boat on a gentle ocean. My throat is raw and sore, but the rest of me is warm and comfortable, cradled by a blanket.

My face feels clammy, and it’s hard to fight my way back to consciousness. That must be from the gas.

As I lie here, fighting the slumberous feeling, I get a sense of deja vu. The morning I woke up after eating at Paisanos and then dreaming of my mystery dom, I felt the same way. There’s a similar heaviness to my limbs.

He drugged me then like he drugged me now. Why did I ever think I could trust him?

I open my eyes, and the first thing I see are the bars. Round and shiny, painted gold, they stretch overhead to create a circular ceiling.

I push myself up. I’m lying on a thick pad, a makeshift bed piled high with blankets and pretty pillows. Light falls over me, bisected by the bars. I look around, and my insides tighten.

I’m in a cage.

I rise, and the structure sways slightly with my movements.

The cage is tall enough for someone twice as tall as me to stand and wide enough that it takes several paces to reach the side.

A short glance off the side tells me I’m still in the dungeon.

The cage hangs in the middle of the room, suspended about ten feet in the air.

He’s done it. He’s caged me like a bird, locked me in here so I can’t fly away.

A wave of weakness makes my legs wobble.

I grab the bars, leaning against them until I can stand on my own.

My shaky limbs and dry mouth catapult me past frustration and into fury.

I can’t believe the bastard drugged me. But now I know there’s nothing Rex won’t do.

No line he won’t cross. I never realized how much I assumed he had a basic level of decency when it came to me.

I relied on it like a tightrope walker relies on a safety net underneath.

But there’s no safety net anymore. Rex ripped it away.

And now I’m a bird in a gilded cage.

I rest my forehead against the bars. They’re solid and shiny, too tightly spaced for much more than my hand and arm to fit through. I peer at the ground below, feeling dizzy.

My gods, I never thought it would come to this.

But what did I expect from a man who murders people without hesitation?

My strength returns slowly. I can’t stop myself from giving the bars a desperate yank, even though I know there’ll be no give to them. They won’t budge. I go hand over hand around the circular cage, not so much trying to force my way out but to prove to myself that I really am trapped.

At the end of the room, a door opens, and Rex strides through. “You’re awake.” He’s changed into a suit, the sort you wear to a boardroom meeting. His hair is freshly combed back from his face and shiny as a raven’s wing.

I close my eyes so I don’t have to look at him.

My animal attraction to him is a weapon he wields against me.

He’s proven to me over and over that he doesn’t see me as an equal, and that’s the thought I need to cling to, not the memories of moments we shared together or all the ways he cared for me.

A mechanism whirs, and the cage lowers, but I still don’t open my eyes, not even when it gently touches down.

His scent wafts over my face as he moves closer. “How are you feeling? There’s water for you if you need it.”

I step back into the middle of the cage as if that will protect me from him. My foot hits a water bottle I didn’t notice before. I stoop to pick it up and sip it slowly, washing the dry feeling out of my mouth.

“Do you need anything else?”

I shake my head and recap the bottle and set it down, still half filled. “Is this how it starts?”

He cocks his head to the side.

“The torture before the murdering. Do you like to put your victims in a cage?”

“No, just you.” He doesn’t smirk, but his smug reply still rankles. “Like this dungeon that I had built for you.”

I had liked that Rex did things for me and me alone. A part of me had thought his obsession was romantic.

But I had also believed there was some goodness in him, something that could redeem him. Not anymore.

“Escalation,” I say to the cage ceiling.

“Many killers start out as Peeping Toms. But voyeurism provides less of a thrill, and they need more. They start to stalk their victims. Collect trophies. And finally. . .” I stop quoting my criminal behavior textbook and give Rex a hollow look. “Well, you know.”

“I’m not going to kill you, Inara.” His tone is patient, almost condescending.

“That’s good to know, I guess.” The sarcasm is satisfying, so I lean in. “Although if you’re lying, I’ll take Paisanos as my last meal. At least I know it goes well with whatever you’re drugging me with.”

“I’m not lying. I’ve done a lot of things, but I haven’t lied to you. I’ve told you everything. No one knows me better than you.”

Oh, how I had reveled in knowing that knowledge. I was proud of the way I peeled his layers apart until I realized he’s a psychopath all the way down. “Lucky me. Is this my reward? A complimentary stay in a cage at Chez Crazy?”

A muscle jerks in his sculpted cheek. “Little bird?—”

“No.” I hold up a hand. “You don’t get to call me that. Especially not when I’m locked in here.” I yank on the bars for emphasis.

“I know you’re upset.”

“Upset doesn’t begin to cover it,” I cry. I snatch up the water bottle and pitch it at his head, but it only hits the bars and rolls back to my feet. “You shouldn’t have done this. Are you insane?”

“You can hate me.” He stands strong, his face inscrutable. He looks like a statue of a man, a general facing down the enemy on the battlefield.

I still feel everything for him, even the things I don’t want to feel. Conflicting emotions I never thought I was capable of. I want to cup his cheeks and kiss him. I want to muss his hair. I want to thump his chest and strangle him. “I trusted you. And you did this.”

“But your safety is my priority. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you.”

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that.” First, I let him flog me, and then I let him hold me.

I thought I could be careful, but I let him in.

I let myself sink into his darkness. I hoped he could be my refuge from the world and the psychic forces that buffeted me.

When we were in the cave with the letters, I tasted BK’s evil, and it coated me like a poisonous film.

I wanted to turn to Rex for comfort, but he’s given into his darkness, and I’ll never have that again.

It hurts so much that I want to howl.

“You know what? A part of me is glad you did this. I thought it would hurt to leave you. Now I can’t wait to see the last of you.

So thanks for making it easy.” I mean for my words to hurt, cruel as a knife between the ribs.

I watch his face closely and don’t miss his flinch.

But with it, I feel an echoing pain in my own chest.

I pick up the water bottle and thrust it through the bars, throwing it at his head. He catches it easily.

I press my face against the bars and remind myself that he’s here to gloat.

To prove his mastery over me. The thought strangles and kills any empathy I feel for him.

“Now I know the truth. I’m just a possession to you.

A trophy you can put on a shelf. I was fooling myself that you could ever see me as more. ”

He shakes his head, but I don’t let him interject.

“You’re like all the other billionaires who inherited Mommy and Daddy’s money. But guess what, Rex? You want a trophy wife? You can have any socialite you want. They’d be happy to spend your money and look good on your arm.”

“I don’t want anyone else.” His eyes blaze as he comes closer to the cage. His controlled expression turns feral, making me glad there are bars between us. “You are it for me.”

“No, I was just an easy target.” All my sarcastic bravado slips away, and suddenly, I’m close to tears, remembering last night.

The tender moments when he held and comforted me, the times he seemed to read my mind and anticipate my needs.

“I thought I could resist you. I had spent so many years being careful. Following my rules. I thought I was strong, but I was actually so needy. And that was my downfall.” I was so alone, hidden behind my thick walls, and when he got past my defenses, I was relieved.

My armor became my weakness. I’d deprived myself for so long I couldn’t be strong. I too quickly craved his touch.

It was easy to forget he was a murderer. That he snuffed out people’s lives as deftly as he tied me up and made me come.

“I don’t hate you, Rex. I hate how fucking weak I am.”

His facade cracks, and I see the pain on his face. “Inara. . . no.” He wants to save me from everything, including my own self-recrimination.

“The saddest thing is, you were it for me, too.” Deep down, I know he’s the only one for me. “And it hurts knowing the one person in the world perfectly suited for me is someone I can never be with.”

“We belong together,” he insists, with the cold command of a man who’s never been denied.

“No. You have to let me go.” I’m not going to submit to him.

“I’ll let you out when you swear to me you won’t run. That you’ll let me keep you safe.”

I shake my head. I can’t bring myself to tell him what he wants to hear. I don’t want to lie to him. Even now, I want to preserve the honesty we had more than I want to be let out of this cage.

“As soon as I get free, I’m going to leave. Go back to the life I was supposed to live.”

Shadows burn in his eyes. “It doesn’t end like this.”

“It’s already over!” I grab the collar around my throat. The smooth metal is not comforting anymore. It’s constricting, and I can’t stand it. I search for a lock or a latch, anything I can manipulate to take it off.

It’s a sign of his ownership, and I can’t bear it.

“I’m not yours,” I say, spitting venom. My stomach is a pool of acid, and my skin is overheating. “I’ll never be yours.”