Page 17

Mindy

is sitting in the front window by the corner with two cups in front of him. His head is down as he stares at the steaming mug.

Whatever this is, it’s bad. Is Pattie sick, or worse, is their baby and my namesake?

“Hey, .” I slide into the seat across from him.

“You came.”

Of course, I did. “What’s wrong?” It better not be that he needs more money. It’s one thing to take out a loan with a balloon payment you can’t afford. It’s another thing to keep asking for money.

He won’t lift his gaze to meet mine.

“Just say it. Whatever it is, just say it,” I blurt out words, hoping they made sense.

He lifts his head up, unable to hide the fear. “I’m in trouble. Big trouble. I need your help.”

has never gotten in trouble, ever. He’s one of those guys that always did the right thing even as a boy. For him to say that, it has to be really bad. But what could it possibly be? He doesn’t even speed when he drives. Everyone goes five miles over the limit or more on a highway, but never .

“What happened?” What can I do to help him would be a better question. But that would show my inadequacy, not the confidence and support he needs now.

“My business hit a rough spot. A couple of employees embezzled funds. And the market had a downturn last year. It’s better now.”

You already told me that.

“But I had to take out a loan to keep everything afloat.”

That’s why I wrote you a check.

“None of the banks were willing to give me one. You know, we just moved into our house a few years ago, so there wasn’t enough equity there to help.”

If you couldn’t get a loan from the bank—

“The only one that would offer me one was the neighborhood loan shark.”

What? How does even know a loan shark? I don’t wanna know. I really don’t want to know.

“He should have been paid off last week. I had a huge contract that I completed. It was more than enough to pay off the loan shark, you, and have a little left over.” absentmindedly stirs his drink. “They didn’t pay. I finished the contract and sent them the invoice. And they didn’t pay it. They might not pay it for a while. Who doesn’t pay their bills? It’s a billion-dollar company, and they gave me some line about having to go through the proper channels to get paid. I don’t know what I’m going to do.” His head falls down, and he holds it up by a handful of hair on either side of his head.

So that balloon payment actually went to a loan shark and not a bank. “How is that possible? They can’t not pay you. You can take them to court.”

“They have lawyers. Lots and lots of lawyers. It’d take even longer. Years maybe for them to actually pay me what I’m owed. It’s better if I wait, but the loan shark won’t wait.”

My stomach sinks.

“He wants more money because I was late paying him. Twenty-five thousand dollars. I was careful this month and saved a little over ten thousand dollars out of the business budget, but that’s not nearly enough to pay him. Mindy, what am I going to do? He won’t just wait until next month to get paid. What am I going to do?”

Never borrow money from a loan shark!! But we can’t change the past, only the present. “Are you sure you can get it by next month?”

’s head pops up. “Yeah. I think so. Do you have a plan?”

Not a plan. I have a check. “You pay the loan shark off until you get the money next month.”

“How? How am I going to get fifteen thousand dollars in a few days? Selling my kidney is sounding better and better than walking in with nothing. This guy is scary.”

The urge to scream fills my lungs and tightens my entire being. I take a deep breath. Urbium usually smells like a thick soupy mixture of the boy’s locker room in my high school, a port-a-potty, and the unwashed masses. But in the coffee shop, it gives a false sense of beauty and joy with the scent of coffee and baked goods..

You can handle this. Flipping out helps nothing.

A boatload of chocolate might help, at least for a few minutes.

Why? Why did my one smart, kind brother have to go do something so incredibly stupid?

“What about your dad?” I don’t consider his father my stepfather anymore. The only good thing that man did for me was pay for my boarding school and not beat up my mom. That can’t be said for all of her boyfriends.

“You know Dad. He’d let us starve or die to prove that we need to be independent adults.”

Yes. Yes, he would. didn’t eat for a week except for the food I snuck him after a fight with his dad. Thankfully, he went back to boarding school, or else would probably have starved to death.

went to a loan shark. My caring, sweet brother went to a loan shark. He put his world at risk to save a job.

Fine, it’s not just a job. He worked his entire life to build this business. To make something of himself to show his dad. “I’m going to write you a check.”

“I can’t ask that from you, Mindy. Your job barely pays anything. And you just got your apartment. It took forever for you to save for that.”

Saving again forever is better than him being broken…or dead. “You didn’t ask. I offered.”

“I can’t take your money, Mindy.”

“You can and you will. My niece needs her father all in one piece, without any broken bones.”

“Mindy, that wasn’t why I invited you to coffee. You… You… You always have practical suggestions and you’re good at puzzles.”

There’s no puzzle strategy to get you out of a loan shark’s clutches. “I know it wasn’t.” I reach out and set my hand on his. “But that’s what needs to happen.”

“I’ll pay you back.”

“I know you will.” would never cheat me. “But right now, you need to focus on getting this guy paid off.” Buried deep down in my purse hidden between an old receipt is what I like to think of as an emergency check. Most people don’t even use a checkbook now, but there are bank card fees everywhere.

What if I ever need to run for my life and hide from the cops somewhere? I can cash my emergency check and then get out of town.

That might officially make me a weirdo, but I’m still good with that.

What if took the money and ran with his family instead of paying the loan shark? If television can be believed—which is almost never—the loan shark would hunt them down and kill them.

That isn’t an option, even if it’s improbable.

I fill out the check that’s going to virtually empty my account. A part of me breathes a sigh of relief that my brother will be safe, and the other part withers and dies at the overwhelming fear that my buffer disappeared with a few strokes of a pen, not that I should need a buffer. My apartment is in better condition than when I signed the rental agreement.

Everything will be fine.

Everyone will be fine.

***

Everything isn’t fine.

The endorphins from speed walking home should have relaxed the tightness in my chest, instead, my ears are starting to ring.

There’s no place to pace in my apartment, and it’s getting dark outside. My neighborhood isn’t really one where you wander around at night.

Winnie… I can call Winnie. She always knows what to say.

“Hey, Mindy,” she answers. “How are you?”

“Have you ever felt like your world turned upside down, but nothing really changed?” the words spew out, probably in a garbled mess.

“Yes.”

There’s the calm, practical answer I need. What I’m feeling is completely normal.

“When my sister, Elynne, moved to the islands to live with her best friend, Bodhi, nothing changed in my life. I fly out to spend a couple of weeks several times a year there and I see her for family-mandated dinners. That’s all we’ve ever seen of each other since we were kids and my parents sent us to different boarding schools.”

Cruel. It was plain old cruel to send them to different places. Fine, Winnie’s parents didn’t want to be bothered with their kids, but at least let the siblings get the opportunity to be together. “Didn’t they take away her trust fund?”

“They tried. My parents hated the fact that she didn’t marry Bodhi and live life the way they were expected to in Urbium, but Grandpa set up a rock-solid trust. The only thing they could do was delay her from receiving funds until she’s thirty-five.”

Being rich and then having it all disappear had to be way more terrifying than my situation. “They wanted to decide who she married? I thought we’d learned it was disastrous to try to control people that way generations ago.”

Winnie’s brittle laugh could compete with fingernails on a chalkboard. “My parents are in a whole other world sometimes. They think women should get married as soon as possible and produce all the children they can. The fact that I haven’t married yet… But at least I didn’t move to the islands.” Her voice has a wistful note to it.

“Do you want to?” I ask another question that’s none of my business.

“Sometimes. But my grandfather loved the fact that I would be the one running his empire. It’s not every day you get the opportunity to do something that has an impact on the world around you.”

Not many women who look like Winnie and have more money than most of the world would love a job in waste management. I don’t even like cleaning my bathroom. And she gets hands-on with every stage of her company’s business, working from the ground up to assess problems and processes. “I couldn’t do your job.”

This laugh is a bit lighter. “Coming from the woman that literally talks people off the edge and listens to people die, my job seems easy.”

Death isn’t as hard as listening to a scared child or worse, one in pain… those cries echo through my head for weeks. “But I also help save lives.” Those people who reach out to say thank you or send pictures that wouldn’t have existed without me balance out the bad days.

“It has to be amazing to know someone got to live because of you.”

“Yeah.” Remember the good. I glance over at my nightstand, where there’s a picture of my brother and his little family smiling. It’s worth every cent.

“Are you ready to talk about what happened today?”

“No.” Because if I mention anything about money, you’d hand it to me without hesitating. I never want to be that poor friend mooching off her rich ones.

“Whenever you’re ready, give me a call.”

***

“Mittens, men are stupid. Have I told you that? Because it’s true.” Mittens lifts up his head and flicks me with his tongue. “Yes, I know you’re technically a male, but you wouldn’t ever be this stupid. Well, ignore the fact that two weeks ago you tried to eat your own body.” Maybe stupidity is just part of the male DNA.

needs to get that contract paid. Because even with this amazing job, I won’t be able to help him again.

He needs to not get killed by a loan shark.

“You ready for a break?”

I jump, startling Mittens who backs away. Maddox’s voice shouldn’t have surprised me. We have a date.

NOT A DATE! We have plans. Plans to eat together. Coworkers eat together all the time. “Sure. I’ll just be a minute.” The last thing in the world that I want to do is eat and make small talk with anyone.

Thankfully, I didn’t drink. If I did, I would probably end up telling him just that, and Maddox doesn’t deserve any of my anger or frustration. He’s just being a nice guy.

The world needs more nice guys.

No matter how I’m feeling, I can go in and pretend to have a nice time.

Smile and never let them see what you’re really feeling. Thanks, Mom.

***

“Burgers and fries were a good pick.” Particularly with whatever seasoning they put on the fries. I might just keep eating until I explode. If I was an emotional eater, these would have hit the spot.

Maddox stares at the board like it contains the cure for cancer.

“You know, games are supposed to be fun.”

He leans back and moves his gaze to me. “They are. Especially when you’re going to win again. In two moves, your queen is going to take my castle, and that will be checkmate. There isn’t any way around it, is there?”

“Nope.” I pop a fry into my mouth. “Sorry.”

He grins. “Don’t be. I’ve just got to know how. How in the world did you get this good?”

I shrug. “Games are fun.”

Maddox lifts the bottle of Snake Bite to his lips.

Don’t pay attention to the muscles in his throat. But how did I never notice how sexy a man’s throat is?

“That’s it. You found it fun, so you got to a point where you could probably compete with grand masters?”

“Is life ever that simple?” Why did I say that? Maddox’s curiosity will make him want to know more.

“No.” He sets down his napkin. “Tell me something real about you.”

Huh?

“We’ve been playing chess for weeks. But the only things I know about you are on your resume and how your strategic mind works. Tell me something real about you.”

Real? “Reality is harder than smiling.” Why did I say that? “Your turn.” I need to stop talking.

“Some mornings I’m afraid to open my eyes.”

Fear hits everyone—I know that logically—But it’s hard to believe a man like him is afraid of anything.

“When did you start smiling?”

Lie. He wouldn’t know. “I’ve been smiling since I can remember.” No one wants to hear your problems or see your tears. Smile and be a good girl. Mom said those words so many times that they’re part of who I am. “Why opening your eyes?”

“Because life is real when you open your eyes. Until then, you can dream that it’s anything you want.”

We both pretend, but I do it to trick others and he does it to trick himself.

Which one is better?

Neither.

And this conversation is too much. “I better get back to work.” A job I won’t be quitting for a very long time.

With that, the pit of my stomach falls out again and that smile returns in force.